View Full Version : Town divided over sexual abuse (+ my own personal story)
blueclouds
03-09-2004, 12:14 AM
OK. Well, this story sounds wayyyyyyyy to familiar. Town divided over charges of sexual abuse. Many people cannot fathom that this is true...
http://www.newsday.com/news/nationworld/wire/sns-ap-teacher-accused,0,2997868.story?coll=sns-ap-nationworld-headlines
So, this is also a story for where parents out there MUST believe in their children. I was 15 and abused by a VERY RESPECTED outstanding citizen of a town of 6000. He was my stepfather. IF you live in Canada, you may see the yellow wishing wells "It Shouldn't Hurt TO Be A Child" from Victims of Violence. That's about my story. The ENTIRE TOWN turned against me. I left western canada for Toronto as I needed to disappear to a place where nobody knew me. Then, when I returned, I was ready to face, convict and fight the town, the perp and the justice system. Thanks to my/our efforts at Victims of Violence, children in Canada NO LONGER had to face their perps in court. Thankfully, their testimony could be video taped.
Long and short of this post. PEOPLE PLEASEEEEEEEE when a child, any child makes an effort to come forward, please believe them until absolutely proven otherwise. NO ONE, I MEAN NO ONE believed me. Even the police. Only until the 'V of V' got involved that I was able to get my story out. My sister, now 20 was also victimized and police turned their backs because this super man had an impeccable reputation in this small town.
I don't care if he walks on water, listen to the children.
OK, that's my confession and vent for now. (Please I'm 34, not seeking sympathy.. as I am healed.) I'm just wanting more people to take notice of children they encounter in their daily lives.
Sprocket
03-09-2004, 02:00 AM
Thank you for sharing. And, congratulations on being able to say, you are "healed." Those are the most powerful words of your story. (jmho, of course.)
All I have to say is...Ted Bundy was also, by all accounts, an upstanding citizen! He volunteered at a crisis center hotline, was a good student, and raped and murdered women every now and again. When are people going to realize that molesters, rapists, and murderers come in all types of packaging? Everyone always expects a monster.
I have a cousin who was molested by her stepfather, an upstanding member of his church. I have a friend who was molested by a family friend, a minister at his church and pillar of his community.
Of course, I do remember that story a long time ago where a well respected daycare was accused by several 3-4 year olds of molestation. It turned into sort of a witch hunt and the kids began making up wild stories which were obviously fed to them by their lawyers. The daycare owner was convicted, but I still wonder if it was true. There was no evidence of anything that children were saying (like cameras set up in certain rooms with torture devides, some other pretty wild stuff). I am just not sure in that case.
The police should take EVERY complaint seriously. Let the evidence lead you afterwards.
These multiple victim, multiple offender cases such as in daycare centers are a bunch of lies concocted by overzealous or even downright vindictive police interrogators who keep yelling at the kids to "tell the truth" until the cops eventually hear what they want to hear. Most of the 'victims' are now adults and have recanted their testimony as induced by police brainwashing and threats to jail their parents.
LP Moderator
03-09-2004, 10:46 AM
Blueclouds, a wonderful post and a wonderful reminder of the right thing to do. Thanks for sharing "your" story with su.
lcookster
03-09-2004, 01:42 PM
Whoa, Toth! I will agree that there have been too many instances of inexperienced investigators asking leading questions but you are being way too sweeping in your statement about multiple offenders/multiple victims. I only have to open my newspaper and read about the latest Catholic priest scandal. I believe that there have been far more instances of a child's voice being ignored than the opposite 'unjustly accused' scenario.
Brefie
03-09-2004, 03:16 PM
Whoa, Toth! I will agree that there have been too many instances of inexperienced investigators asking leading questions but you are being way too sweeping in your statement about multiple offenders/multiple victims.
Take no notice of Toth. This poster loves to cause a stir with sensationalism.
Blueclouds, thanks for sharing, it's truly wonderful that you can say you are healed. God Bless you.
Casshew
03-09-2004, 04:00 PM
If the Jury had believed two young girls that Avila molested them... Samantha Runnion woiuld have been alive today.
I agree, you have to believe the children.
LP Moderator
03-09-2004, 04:36 PM
I just heard a story last night about a girl who was doing a ride along with paramedics to get a scouting badge was "convinced" to have sex with them. Hello??? She's a minor!! That's not convincing, that's rape. Children can't consent to having sexual relations.
Now a days if your child is going on a "ride along" with police, fire or rescue services, its a good idea to go along too! And what a crying shame that is.
Brefie
03-09-2004, 04:52 PM
There is nothing left that is worthy of our trust anymore.
Too many stories of police brutality, teachers and priests molesting children, and now paramedics?
Too sad.
LP Moderator
03-09-2004, 05:08 PM
There is nothing left that is worthy of our trust anymore.
Too many stories of police brutality, teachers and priests molesting children, and now paramedics?
Too sad.
That's exactly right. You wouldn't believe how I question my children and the families of people where they've been invited to sleep overs, etc. We live in a really small community, but you never can be too careful. One of our children's friend had a father who was a volunteer police officer. One day, he left his gun out and she picked it up and killed herself. Now I'm sure that it completely shattered their family, but what if that had been someone else's child who had been visiting? Our kids have GOT to be tough these days and unfortunately, we've got to warn them at younger and younger ages of what's out there. THEN, we've STILL got to watch them.
These multiple victim, multiple offender cases such as in daycare centers are a bunch of lies concocted by overzealous or even downright vindictive police interrogators who keep yelling at the kids to "tell the truth" until the cops eventually hear what they want to hear. Most of the 'victims' are now adults and have recanted their testimony as induced by police brainwashing and threats to jail their parents.
Toth is right in some respects that many of these group victims, especially very young children, have recanted as adults. They were led to say the things they said by the police. That is why I say to believe the children first, then let the evidence lead you. It is supposed in the daycare case that the police created the evidence rather than allowed the evidence to lead them. For instance, children that young probably could not make up the fact that there were cameras in rooms with leather whips and chains, but if an officer asked the child, "Were there cameras? Were there chains?", so many times, the child might eventually say, "There were cameras. There were chains."
mindys
03-09-2004, 06:23 PM
BLUE, YOU GO GIRL!! What courage, THANK YOU for sharing! For You:
Hero
by Mariah Carey
There's a hero
If you look inside your heart
You don't have to be afraid
Of what you are
There's an answer
If you reach into your soul
And the sorrow that you know
Will melt away
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
It's a long road
When you face the world alone
No one reaches out a hand
For you to hold
You can find love
If you search within yourself
And the emptiness you felt
Will disappear
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
Lord knows
Dreams are hard to follow
But don't let anyone
Tear them away
Hold on
There will be tomorrow
In time
You'll find the way
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
blueclouds
03-10-2004, 03:38 PM
Oh Mindy, that's one of my all time fav songs. Thank u. Thanks for the feedback all (including you too Toth);)
I agree that there are many overzealous authority personnel out there that could "lead" a child to say things. Especially if the child feels they will be able to leave as soon as they hear those things. There are many cases that are false. There are even more that are not. Majority of the children who talk/show signs of abuse are abused. Just always believe the child 1st no matter, until evidence leads you elsewhere.
Catholic priests for sure. It seems whenever a parent made an accusation the church labeled them bad catholics and at most sent the priest to a different location. I'm sure some of the lawsuits are bogus: simply someone seeing dollars, but I'm sure there are a great many more who keep silent to this day.
I doubt that parishioners were really unaware of priests taking money as well as liberties. They may not have been actually witnesses to anything, but I doubt it was anywhere near a secret as it is claimed to have been.
But these daycare scandals were pure police and psychologist's creations... and they knew it. So did the prosecutors!
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