The face of Dom Violence-what happens when he is let out?

[believe09]

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090602/ap_on_re_us/us_abuser_released;_ylt=AhtVigVOTXLWbuLXi2JhE8Zvzw cF;_ylu=X3oDMTJqbHUzNzY2BGFzc2V0A2FwLzIwMDkwNjAyL3 VzX2FidXNlcl9yZWxlYXNlZARjcG9zAzMEcG9zAzkEc2VjA3lu X3RvcF9zdG9yeQRzbGsDYWJ1c2Vkd29tYW5p

His attorney tells the AP that she has nothing to fear-that the perp has no interest in pursuing her.

That should make her sleep well at night.

[AmandaBrown23]

I cant believe that they know full well that he plans to kill her when he is released, and yet here he is walking out free and probably planning her murder right now. And when he does succeed what will they say??? Oh we are so sorry this is so tragic and sad. When will the law protect battered women better? I hate to hear things like this it gets me all fired up.

[believe09]

I cant believe that they know full well that he plans to kill her when he is released, and yet here he is walking out free and probably planning her murder right now. And when he does succeed what will they say??? Oh we are so sorry this is so tragic and sad. When will the law protect battered women better? I hate to hear things like this it gets me all fired up.

Note to self-when possible let's rally the forces and start counting the number of domestic violence victims who are killed or maimed while having a restraining order. It has to be in the thousands.

If that is not indicative of a system that needs to change nothing is....here in MA we just took a giant step backwards regarding this issue with new legislation that makes it infinitely harder to obtain a PO. Yes, there are some bad apples who file to tickle their soon to be ex's. But that number has to be far outweighed by the number of people who truly need them. I have a close friend who fled the state the day before her ex was paroled after having done 3 years for ATTEMPTED MURDER (sorry for the caps) after he tossed her down a flight of stairs in front of her children, breaking all of the long bones in her body. He then stepped over her and sat to watch TV while she bled out. Fortunately a neighbor heard the fall and called 911. It only took her 18 months to learn how to walk again and feed herself....but he was released early for good behavior. Guess where his first call was when he hit the half-way house? Guess where his first visit was as soon as he could get a ride? Want to know why it was not considered a parole violation? She wasn't there...she was long gone by then, but I rest my case.

These folks make a promise to themselves that you will die at their hands because of the wrongs that have been visited upon them, or because you have the b***s to fight back. My friend will look over her shoulder for the rest of her life.

Yeah, nothing like a piece of paper standing between you and your death.

[AmandaBrown23]

Note to self-when possible let's rally the forces and start counting the number of domestic violence victims who are killed or maimed while having a restraining order. It has to be in the thousands.

If that is not indicative of a system that needs to change nothing is....here in MA we just took a giant step backwards regarding this issue with new legislation that makes it infinitely harder to obtain a PO. Yes, there are some bad apples who file to tickle their soon to be ex's. But that number has to be far outweighed by the number of people who truly need them. I have a close friend who fled the state the day before her ex was paroled after having done 3 years for ATTEMPTED MURDER (sorry for the caps) after he tossed her down a flight of stairs in front of her children, breaking all of the long bones in her body. He then stepped over her and sat to watch TV while she bled out. Fortunately a neighbor heard the fall and called 911. It only took her 18 months to learn how to walk again and feed herself....but he was released early for good behavior. Guess where his first call was when he hit the half-way house? Guess where his first visit was as soon as he could get a ride? Want to know why it was not considered a parole violation? She wasn't there...she was long gone by then, but I rest my case.

These folks make a promise to themselves that you will die at their hands because of the wrongs that have been visited upon them, or because you have the b***s to fight back. My friend will look over her shoulder for the rest of her life.

Yeah, nothing like a piece of paper standing between you and your death.

Thats horrible that your friend had to go through such an ordeal. I pound into my sons head everyday that violence is not okay and he should never hit a woman. There has got to be a way to do something about this.

[marla]

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090602/ap_on_re_us/us_abuser_released;_ylt=AhtVigVOTXLWbuLXi2JhE8Zvzw cF;_ylu=X3oDMTJqbHUzNzY2BGFzc2V0A2FwLzIwMDkwNjAyL3 VzX2FidXNlcl9yZWxlYXNlZARjcG9zAzMEcG9zAzkEc2VjA3lu X3RvcF9zdG9yeQRzbGsDYWJ1c2Vkd29tYW5p

His attorney tells the AP that she has nothing to fear-that the perp has no interest in pursuing her.

That should make her sleep well at night.

How awful .. :(

[Columbo]

Why do these guys keep getting freed ? Why do the judges believe what they say and minimalize the horrific damage done to this woman and any victim of domestic abuse ?
Sickening....

[athy]

when i was about 22 and pregnant with 3rd child one of my friends and her 13 year old son were shot. she had broken up with him the day before. two of her daughters came running into our house where they knew we would keep them safe and one daughter was in the bathtub at their house. the daughters told us he had a gun so i called 911 and told my then hubby to hide the girls. i figured he knew they came into my house and if he got in and didn't see them it would stop him at least for a moment or two. the LE just came around the corner as my friend was outside holding her 4 year old daughter in her arms. her 13 year old son was trying to protect his mom and the bf shot him point blank in the chest then shot mom in the neck. he then aimed at the 4 year old but by then the LE were out of the car and were able to stop him.

come to find out he was from another state and when he and his first wife divorced the judge told him he had to leave state because he was afraid the guy would go after the ex. yeah right...so instead of putting him someplace because the guy definitely was mental they let him out so he could come up and kill my friend.

[Fairy1]

My heart goes out to this woman and all the others who are in the same position - many of whom will be killed at the hands of their abusers. It's not enough that she is permanently disabled as a result of the brutal beating he gave her. But now she will have to look over her shoulder for the rest of her - or his - life. Why should she have to move? She did nothing wrong. And she's wise enough to realize it really wouldn't matter. He will find her if he's determined.

I can't imagine what more must be done to keep women safe. This is the USA where - supposedly - women are not second class citizens. Yet so much says that we still are. It's embarassing and frightening.

[mysteriew]

What happens when he goes to jail for DV then gets out?

First of all, he is not just enraged over the original problem, he is also enraged that she had the 'nerve' to call LE on him!

So he goes to jail, and maybe he serves some time, but unless there are major injuries it is usually only a matter of hours. Even if he serves some time, he gets out. Maybe she will be warned, but there will not be any monitoring of him. He served his time and gets his rights back.

One of his rights is to tell his side of the story to anyone who will listen- including the victims family and friends. And that version may not be recognizable by the victim or match any of the injuries she sustained. He also has the right to try to destroy the victim's friendships, to try to leave her feeling as alone as he thinks she should be.

He has a right to see his kids. Usually without supervision. The kids of course are sometimes persuaded to sneak him keys, they know Mom's activities and schedules. And the kids know where she is staying. But visitation is a separate issue and he is entitled to see his kids as long as he hasn't made any attempts to harm them.

Child support is a separate issue. But withholding child support is a favorite issue for alleged Daddys to keep some control over Mommy's. And the child support system is so messed up that if he withholds support then it is months before an attempt is made to enforce it, sometimes it is never enforced.

He has the right to sue for custody of the children. And if he sues for custody, he has the right to say anything he wishes about the mother... his victim. Complaints of abuse, neglect and drug/alcohol use are common. Even if they aren't true. If he can get someone to testify for him, he might even get custody.

He may be ordered for probation, but it takes more than you would think to revoke probation. Just breaking the probation rules by 'visiting' his victim doesn't always count.

Mommy can get a TRO. But no one tells her the difference between a civil TRO and a criminal TRO. Civil TRO's may not be enforced by LE. Even with a criminal TRO, if he calls or shows up and doesn't attempt to injure her or make threats the LE may not enforce the TRO. Not taking into account of course that the very fact that he called or showed up was the threat.

And of course a TRO cannot stop a bullet. LE can do nothing, unless he is actually caught in the act of committing a crime. So by the time that he is in the home, maybe they could enforce the TRO..... but of course by that time it is too late.

If anyone ever has to get a TRO, know that it isn't enough. Know that in addition to the TRO that you must a. Find a safe place to stay. And Mom's house is not a safe place. He will look there. b. Change your life and the lives of your kids. For a period of time you must change your schedule, where you go and who you see. c. Know that he will not change. He may make promises, he may say he is sorry but that rage about the arrest is there and will be there. And he will do it again.

Somebody mentioned fair. No it is not fair. The victim makes the sacrifices and has to give everything up. But that is the way with any crime. The victim is the one who suffers. Domestic violence is a crime like any other crime. It isn't fair.