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View Full Version : GUILTY Boy Locked in Closet for 4 Years, Escapes



gitana1
09-28-2009, 01:43 PM
Here we go again:
http://www.koco.com/cnn-news/21136946/detail.html
Reminds me of Kyle in California. Horrible.

momtective
09-28-2009, 01:48 PM
This just breaks my heart. I'm so glad he managed to escape and get help.

momtective
09-28-2009, 01:54 PM
http://www.myspace.com/309422583

Oh yeah...lock him up and throw away the key.
From his MS page "he dont watch tv much, He mostly plays with his xbox 360 or ps2 or is on the cpu but when he's with someone they get all his attention."

gitana1
09-28-2009, 02:15 PM
http://www.myspace.com/309422583

Oh yeah...lock him up and throw away the key.
From his MS page "he dont watch tv much, He mostly plays with his xbox 360 or ps2 or is on the cpu but when he's with someone they get all his attention."

Great find. Notice how his only myspace friend is an 18 year old girl? Sick bast*#d

momtective
09-28-2009, 02:16 PM
Great find. Notice how his only myspace friend is an 18 year old girl? Sick bast*#d

Yeah and her last name is McCall...same as his accomplice...maybe it's her daughter.

tracy87
09-28-2009, 02:30 PM
is it known the relationship between the victim and the 2 who held him? or did i miss it in the article? :}

how does anyone get away with hiding/holding someone captive for over 4 years? where are the cousins, aunts, grandparents, teachers? didn't anyone notice he was missing?

poor kid...to go from the age of 10 to 14 with little to no contact with anyone. how will he be affected for the rest of his life? mentally, spiritually, physically, scholastically: will he be able to recover?

so sad.

Vegas Bride
09-28-2009, 02:54 PM
Yeah and her last name is McCall...same as his accomplice...maybe it's her daughter.

I think that is her mother, on his myspace you can click onto hers and she has her parents names listed on the little scroll down part.

How many children are being kept like this? How is it possible they aren't missed by someone?

VB

STEADFAST
09-28-2009, 03:35 PM
I'm confused about the address where the article says the child was held. The only thing on that road is the guard house for a base (I assume the National Guard base.) -- no houses along there, and barriers are scattered all over the road, like in front of all bases. I can't imagine that a National Guard base would have family housing. Anybody know? Otherwise, that address seems like it must be the captor's work address.

cynsational
09-28-2009, 04:28 PM
http://www.newsok.com/oklahoma-city-youth-tells-police-mother-locked-him-in-home-for-4-12-years-beat-him/article/3404633?custom_click=lead_story_title

There is a video at this link. Apt shown is at:
2269 NE Grand Blvd.

At the court website in Oklahoma, it looks like LaRhonda and Steve have lived at numerous apartments in Oklahoma City and have been kicked out of numerous places.
http://www.oscn.net/applications/oscn/casesearch.asp

gitana1
09-29-2009, 03:51 PM
is it known the relationship between the victim and the 2 who held him? or did i miss it in the article? :}

how does anyone get away with hiding/holding someone captive for over 4 years? where are the cousins, aunts, grandparents, teachers? didn't anyone notice he was missing?

poor kid...to go from the age of 10 to 14 with little to no contact with anyone. how will he be affected for the rest of his life? mentally, spiritually, physically, scholastically: will he be able to recover?

so sad.

It looks like it was the child's mother and her boyfriend that were arrested.


I think that is her mother, on his myspace you can click onto hers and she has her parents names listed on the little scroll down part.

How many children are being kept like this? How is it possible they aren't missed by someone?

VB

The one friend on the perps myspace is listed as 18 years old. Could be the mother, though, just lying about her age, because she looks a lot like the woman arrested. Hard to tell.
Good question about how many kids are being held like this. As we have seen from other cases, neighbors and family members really need to start being more nosy and to report, and keep reporting if they feel something is wrong. That might limit these kind of case. Unfortunately, it seems that sometimes witnesses who could report and protect the child, end up joining in on the abuse, as we saw with the case of Kyle in CA. Where the heck do such monsters come from? Or, is it that creeps just tend to associate with other creeps?

MeoW333
09-29-2009, 04:04 PM
Thank God he managed to escape! Maybe the mother and co. had told relatives he had gone to live with his father or to a reformatory? It is a wonder these children aren't missed!
Some families aren't very close so i guess wouldn't know..

kgeaux
09-29-2009, 08:38 PM
I cannot even fathom a mother allowing, much less participating in, this type of abuse of her child. They poured alcohol on his tummy and set him on fire. Beat him with extension cords. Thank God his older sister finally helped him to escape.

Young man, you were created for better than this. I hope and pray that you can heal from the wrongs done to you. Your very best revenge against this abuse is to become MORE than you have ever dreamed you could be. God bless, son. God bless.

Vegas Bride
09-29-2009, 08:43 PM
The one friend on the perps myspace is listed as 18 years old. Could be the mother, though, just lying about her age, because she looks a lot like the woman arrested. Hard to tell.
Good question about how many kids are being held like this. As we have seen from other cases, neighbors and family members really need to start being more nosy and to report, and keep reporting if they feel something is wrong. That might limit these kind of case. Unfortunately, it seems that sometimes witnesses who could report and protect the child, end up joining in on the abuse, as we saw with the case of Kyle in CA. Where the heck do such monsters come from? Or, is it that creeps just tend to associate with other creeps?

The 18 yo friend on his myspace, I believe is the daughter of his girlfriend, and the sister of this young boy. If you go to her myspace, she has her parents names listed and also says she has sisters and brothers.

VB

belleyes
09-29-2009, 09:21 PM
It looks like it was the child's mother and her boyfriend that were arrested.
The one friend on the perps myspace is listed as 18 years old. Could be the mother, though, just lying about her age, because she looks a lot like the woman arrested. Hard to tell.
Good question about how many kids are being held like this. As we have seen from other cases, neighbors and family members really need to start being more nosy and to report, and keep reporting if they feel something is wrong. That might limit these kind of case. Unfortunately, it seems that sometimes witnesses who could report and protect the child, end up joining in on the abuse, as we saw with the case of Kyle in CA. Where the heck do such monsters come from? Or, is it that creeps just tend to associate with other creeps?


*bolded by me*


1. REPORT REPORT REPORT-- Many times people dont report the things that set the "hinky meter" off but, That one "hinky" just might be the missing piece CPS needs to open a case. I know that people dont believe it but CPS does have to follow state regs on opening a case. (ie:evidence or complaints)

2. Yes they do associate with each other. True Case----- I had a client who had a family "intervention" with a relative who was looking at child porn--the intervention was not becasue of the act but because of the amount of time the child porn was taking up:eek:
Turns out the perp was actually making child porn but family denied the seriousness of the situation long story short ---perp is away for 24 years:dance:


* yes I reported this when my client brought it to my attention unfourtunately police investigations cant be done on "hearsay" so it took a lot longer to get a resolution on this case But CPS was able to remove the children*

Salem
09-29-2009, 09:21 PM
Bless this child. May he be safe for the rest of his life!

Salem

mysticrose
09-29-2009, 10:44 PM
A report taken by police indicated the boy was filthy, wore no shoes and had scars lacing his arms and back. He reportedly displayed scars on his neck, stomach and torso and claimed the abuse started shortly after he moved in with his mother after she was released from prison 4 1/2 years ago.
Mom charged with locking son in closet

The Oklahoman quoted a former landlord of McCall's who said she always kept the door to a bedroom closed, adding she never saw the boy among McCall's six other children


http://www.upi.com/Top_News/2009/09/29/Mom-charged-with-locking-son-in-closet/UPI-15561254223956/

mysticrose
09-29-2009, 10:46 PM
Mother Locked Up After Locking Son In Closet For Four Years

by JORDAN C. ALSTON September 29, 2009, 12:55pm

A 14-year-old teen is resting easy in the strong arms of Child Protection Services after serving a four year stint as a prisoner in his own home.

37-year-old LaRhonda McCall has been charged with 20 counts of child abuse and neglect after her teenage son “escaped” from a closet that she locked him in for nearly 4 years.

Police were alerted to the situation after the teen made his way to a National Guard facility in Oklahoma City and caught the attention of a security guard on duty


http://hiphopwired.com/11080/mother-locked-up-after-locking-son-in-closet-for-four-years/

mysticrose
09-29-2009, 10:49 PM
Officers Who Helped Abused, Starved Teen Relive Encounter
Posted: Sep 29, 2009 5:31 PM MDT
Updated: Sep 29, 2009 8:12 PM MDT

OKLAHOMA CITY -- The officers who helped a 14-year-old after he escaped from a home where he was allegedly beaten, starved and locked up in a closet by his mother and her friend spoke out about their shocking encounter with the boy.

The National Guard building on Northeast 36th Street is where that 14-year-old boy sought refuge after his 18-year-old sister helped him escape from what he called an abusive home. It was there that he approached the officers on duty and said he needed a police officer.

"He said that's he's been abused for the past four years and didn't want to go home. He was tired of it," said Leslie Sanders, Oklahoma Military Department.

The boy said the abuse happened at this apartment, just a mile away from the National Guard building. Officers said his body was covered with new and old wounds.

"They looked like bruises and burn marks. His wrists looks like he'd been handcuffs and had ropes or chains around him," said Paul Clark, Oklahoma Military Department. "At first it was kind of 'oh my god' and then it was like OK, let's get this kid some help."

The officers took the boy inside, fed him and called police. LaRhonda McCall, 37 and her friend Steve Hamilton, 38, were arrested and each face 20 complaints of child abuse and child neglect

http://www.newson6.com/Global/story.asp?S=11227295

mysterygirl
09-30-2009, 10:46 AM
That poor poor boy. Thank god he escaped because I have no doubt they would have eventually killed him.

I hope he can heal from this evil

Hopeful One
09-30-2009, 11:09 AM
Sick. I hope and pray that he can find a loving family that will take him in and treat him well.

cynsational
09-30-2009, 06:02 PM
I am so mad I could scream. On the local news koco, they said that this mother had previously been in prison in New York for murdering another child. What is going on with our justice system?

The mother arrested Saturday on suspicion of locking her son in a closet for more than four years was arrested 14 years ago in connection with the death of her 2-year-old child in New York, police said.
more info at link. I am too mad to type anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

http://www.koco.com/news/21162547/detail.html

kgeaux
09-30-2009, 08:56 PM
I am so mad I could scream. On the local news koco, they said that this mother had previously been in prison in New York for murdering another child. What is going on with our justice system?

The mother arrested Saturday on suspicion of locking her son in a closet for more than four years was arrested 14 years ago in connection with the death of her 2-year-old child in New York, police said.
more info at link. I am too mad to type anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

http://www.koco.com/news/21162547/detail.html

Oh, God. When are we going to learn that we cannot return children to abusive parents. I truly believe that anyone who would hurt, starve and kill their own flesh and blood cannot be rehabilitated. It's like pedophilia---the scales of justice should tilt sharply toward the protection of children, screw the perpetrator's right to be "reunited" with their kids.

I hope this woman and her "boyfriend" never, ever have access to another child for the rest of their sorry lives. And I hope and pray that this young man recovers from the evil done to him.

mysteriew
09-30-2009, 10:38 PM
I am so mad I could scream. On the local news koco, they said that this mother had previously been in prison in New York for murdering another child. What is going on with our justice system?

The mother arrested Saturday on suspicion of locking her son in a closet for more than four years was arrested 14 years ago in connection with the death of her 2-year-old child in New York, police said.
more info at link. I am too mad to type anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

http://www.koco.com/news/21162547/detail.html

I had to stop to think about this. She is convicted of killing one of her kids 14 years ago but is already out??? This kid was a minor child during her incarceration. Who took care of him while she was in prison? Where did they go after she took back the child?

Something tells me there will be children services complaints on this mother. At least sometime before she locked the boy up. Quite possibly cps had this boy in foster care while she was incarcerated, and when she got out they probably gave her her other kids back and never checked again.

MeoW333
10-01-2009, 03:46 PM
All she got for killing her 2 year old was 6months in jail and 5 years probation??!! WTH?? That's crazy!
It says neighbors didn't see the boy among her 6 other children. It seems in these cases we see of severe child abuse, it seems it is one or 2 children that are singled out in the family that are severely abused, while the other children are treated as "normal" members would be. Why is that? Did anyone else notice that?

cynsational
10-01-2009, 07:52 PM
http://newsok.com/okla.-boys-sister-says-she-feared-reporting-abuse/article/3405494?custom_click=rss

The 18 year old sister of an Oklahoma boy who says his mother locked him in apartment closets over four years said Thursday she would bring her brother food, but would tell him not to chew because their mother would check his teeth to see whether he had eaten.

LaRhonda McCall was convicted of second-degree manslaughter in New York in 1996 in the death of her 2-year-old daughter and served six months jail time. Prosecutors in that case alleged McCall, then named LaRhonda Presley, essentially starved the toddler who died in February 1995, according to a New York grand jury indictment obtained by the AP.

She and her brother went to live with a cousin in New Jersey for several years after their mother was convicted.

More at link.

All of her children have been affected by this b*(&#. I can't believe that she wasn't on some kind of lifetime parole that prevented her to have any contact with children, hers or otherwise. I can't believe people can kill their children and just get a slap on the wrist. When will we learn that we can't fix some people that are just plain evil and twisted.

believe09
10-16-2009, 12:03 PM
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091016/ap_on_re_us/us_child_imprisoned

She was charged yesterday with 29 counts in the horrific torture of this boy.

She had 7 children, 6 of whom were actually seen at any given time. She murdered her 2 year old when this boy was born or shortly after.

PSSSTTTTTT, judge-she is going to do it again. Please, Please, Please give her lwop. TIA.

Missizzy
10-16-2009, 02:35 PM
The question was posed as to when are we going to learn to stop returning children to abusive parents. I'd like to respond. It's not about "best practice" and safety, it's about funding. Foster care is expensive. Until we, as a society, stem violence in the home AND step up to the plate with appropriate funding for foster care and adoption, we will continue to see this horrific cycle. We will continue watching in horror as judges and caseworkers are pressured by budgetary committees to return children to "at risk" homes. Please remember when children are in out of home placements, we all pay their bills. We have to be willing to open our wallets.

It's very easy to say, remove the child. However, a foster home must be located. That's not easy these days as foster homes are hard to maintain due to the payments being woefully inadequate. With very few exceptions (granted, brought to our attention by a few rotten apples), foster parents work harder than anyone can imagine for a mere pittance of what it really costs to raise a child. It truly is often charity work. To maintain quality foster homes, we need to be ready to pay for that quality. Children in foster care also receive medical cards, mental health therapy, and medications. All this costs a great deal of money. The legal system is still painfully slow when it comes to terminating parental rights as attorneys fight mightily for "parents' rights". Every time a child has a hearing, it costs money.

We also need permanency for children who cannot go home. The federal government has mandated that children require permanency. They do not want "legal orphans". There are over 200,000 (nacac.org) children awaiting adoption currently in the US. These are children who are typically of color, are in a sibling group, have some range of medical and/or mental health challenges, and are suffering from the trauma of abandonment and abuse. The trauma does not stop the day the child steps through the door of DHS. Even when we are successful in placing a child for adoption, those children and those families require and are entitled to years of post-adoption support.

Consider writing your legislators about the importance of funding for children's services. Consider becoming a foster parent. Consider adopting. Consider becoming a CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocate). If you can't do any of these things, donate to your local foster parents' association, help tutor or mentor or drive a foster child to appointments. It can change your life. No, you can't help them all but you can make a world of difference for one child.

Our family has adopted 10 times and is now fostering one. It's been HARD HARD work. But I never wonder what I can do. I just open my eyes every morning, pick up my day-planner and it's all spelled out for me. If we all work together, we can create a safety net for all our children. The operative word here is "our".

Off my soapbox now...we can carry on.

Columbo
10-18-2009, 08:17 PM
All she got for killing her 2 year old was 6months in jail and 5 years probation??!! WTH?? That's crazy!
It says neighbors didn't see the boy among her 6 other children. It seems in these cases we see of severe child abuse, it seems it is one or 2 children that are singled out in the family that are severely abused, while the other children are treated as "normal" members would be. Why is that? Did anyone else notice that?

Yes, it always seems as if it's just one child who gets singled out for abuse. I don't know why--often the most talented and bright ones, too. I'm thinking in particular of that little girl in N.Y. , Elisa Izquierdo. http://sites.google.com/site/inmemoryofelisaizquierdo/

What on earth could a ten year old child do to deserve the treatment this boy got? "Stealing" ? He was probably stealing food because they didn't feed him. But no matter--locking someone in a closet, abusing and torturing them is not a way to stop them from stealing.

Also, why is it, the people who starve their kids are always big and fat themselves?

erynne936
10-19-2009, 06:43 PM
Yes, it always seems as if it's just one child who gets singled out for abuse. I don't know why--often the most talented and bright ones, too.

I think the parents are intimidated by these childrens' intelligence and inner strength and beauty and they worry they won't be able to control this child, maybe like they have controlled the others, so they beat down the brightest and strongest, especially those that dare to speak up for themselves and question the parents, so that they can stay "on top" and in control.

Missizzy
10-19-2009, 11:44 PM
I just thought I was off that soapbox. Sorry. I truly hope I don't get trounced for saying what I am about to say but I think this needs to be said. I am so relieved that this young man had the courage to say "enough" and ask for help. I am hoping that the adults responsible are put away for a long long time. I agree that the mother's prior sentence for killing her child is unacceptable. However, I'd like to make a general observation on parenting which may or may not apply to this young man at all (please keep this disclaimer in mind). He is a victim and let's hope he becomes a true survivor. Please know that I pity him and have a great deal of sorrow for what he has lived through.

That said, I would like to state that unquestionably some children are challenging to raise and some parents are not gifted with the patience or resources to parent AT ALL. When I read this story, my first thought was that there must be some substance abuse issues in this family. There is obviously severe dysfunction. The mother does not strike me as well educated or resourceful or as having a healthy support system. Something is definitely broken in this family. Once again, where were the neighbors?

If these things are true, it is highly possible that some, if not all, of her children were born with special challenges. While it is possible that this boy was talented and bright and the mother was "beating him down", I think there might be other scenarios. One of life's greatest ironies is that the people who can least handle difficult or "different" children often end up with them. Foolishly, they often keep having them. Did you know that studies show that each subsequent male child born to a substance abusing mother will present greater deficits? What was nature thinking? Our natural rescue response often clicks in upon reading one of these stories and we think "give me that child and I will love and protect him/her". It's not quite that simple.

Children who are born with substance exposure and/or into dysfunction suffer from deprivation in their prenatal and postnatal periods. They often exhibit behaviors that would drive sane and sober parents to distraction. They typically have lower IQs, more mental health issues, spectrum disorders, and defiance and attention disorders. Quite bluntly, they are hard wired differently. The damage to these children begins with multi-generational issues of dysfunction and carries through to a lack of trust and bonding in infancy. This then morphs into difficult toddlers and unmanageable older kids. Add to this a stressed out, mentally unstable parent and tragedy is a given.

I've parented a houseful of "challenging" and "at-risk" children for over 20 years. These are children taken by court order from situations very similar to this story. I chose to do this. It didn't all fall down around me because of deficits in my own life. If I didn't have a great marriage, loving extended family, supportive friends, engaged teachers, caring therapists, responsive police and judicial system, I couldn't do it. I might have stepped over the precipice and become abusive. I can't tell you how many times I've been raged at, spit on, assaulted, called every name in the book. I've spent my life in school meetings, therapy offices, ERs, juvenile court. We parent in a specialized milieu style, processing everything, teaching consequences...all while making our family look as close to "normal" as possible.

I've made certain to be mindful of my own needs and of my marriage. When I'm in trouble, I've called for help and gotten it. I've taken time-outs. I know how to "work" the system and get services in a timely manner. I know the police chief's and DA's phone numbers by memory. I can look at a problem and come up with viable solutions.

In other words, I don't resort to locking a child that irritated me in a closet. I would like to honestly admit that I've entertained the thought, though. Does that make me shameful? I think it shows that I'm human. I try hard to do the right thing. I also strive to have a respected reputation with the professionals I work with. I do my level best to not take things personally and to stay calm in the face of chaos. And, most importantly, I'm fortunate to not have personal demons I fight off everyday which could cause me to stumble and do the unthinkable.

I am not for a single second defending this monster of a mother. She set this in motion. She did the unforgivable. She's obviously sick and demented and pushed beyond her limits to parent in a reasonable way. She must pay for her crime. I'm simply trying to help others who have not lived in homes with difficult or "different" or even too many children grasp that most parents do not get up in the morning thinking, "how can I hurt my child today?" (Note I said most)

When the rent is late, you just got laid off, you can't afford the drugs (legal or illegal) you need, the toilet's clogged, your spouse/partner got drunk and slugged you, the stray cat just had kittens in the bathroom, the pantry's empty, the neighbors' dog is barking, the police keep trying to serve you with a warrant, the baby's crying and just will NOT stop, and the teenager gets mouthy....what are you going to do? Quick...what are you going to do?

Granted, people are responsible for the messes they make of their lives and often children get caught in the middle. People make horrid mistakes when under pressure. They often get stuck and keep repeating their mistakes when they are triggered. And children get hurt and neglected and their souls and bodies wounded.

One of the most powerful statements I learned in all my years of attending trainings in specialized parenting in reference to the parents of abused/neglected children is "their reality is not your reality". I think of that often when I read yet another of these horror stories of a child who is burned or beaten or shaken or tied up or locked in a closet. Folks, we don't live in this woman's reality. I abhor what she did to her child but the "perfect storm" of abuse presented itself at this poor boy's conception. Talented or special needs, he deserved love and protection. He didn't get it. His mother failed him.

We, as a society have to figure out how to halt this process. We can't just keep cleaning up the messes. How many brain-damaged babies and bruised teens can we all accept? We know that many many of these children will not heal and will be stuck in a never-ending cycle of repeating the sins of their mothers and fathers. I don't have the answers but I do know that children are hurting.

mysteriew
10-20-2009, 01:44 AM
I just thought I was off that soapbox. Sorry. I truly hope I don't get trounced for saying what I am about to say but I think this needs to be said. I am so relieved that this young man had the courage to say "enough" and ask for help. I am hoping that the adults responsible are put away for a long long time. I agree that the mother's prior sentence for killing her child is unacceptable. However, I'd like to make a general observation on parenting which may or may not apply to this young man at all (please keep this disclaimer in mind). He is a victim and let's hope he becomes a true survivor. Please know that I pity him and have a great deal of sorrow for what he has lived through.

That said, I would like to state that unquestionably some children are challenging to raise and some parents are not gifted with the patience or resources to parent AT ALL. When I read this story, my first thought was that there must be some substance abuse issues in this family. There is obviously severe dysfunction. The mother does not strike me as well educated or resourceful or as having a healthy support system. Something is definitely broken in this family. Once again, where were the neighbors?

If these things are true, it is highly possible that some, if not all, of her children were born with special challenges. While it is possible that this boy was talented and bright and the mother was "beating him down", I think there might be other scenarios. One of life's greatest ironies is that the people who can least handle difficult or "different" children often end up with them. Foolishly, they often keep having them. Did you know that studies show that each subsequent male child born to a substance abusing mother will present greater deficits? What was nature thinking? Our natural rescue response often clicks in upon reading one of these stories and we think "give me that child and I will love and protect him/her". It's not quite that simple.

Children who are born with substance exposure and/or into dysfunction suffer from deprivation in their prenatal and postnatal periods. They often exhibit behaviors that would drive sane and sober parents to distraction. They typically have lower IQs, more mental health issues, spectrum disorders, and defiance and attention disorders. Quite bluntly, they are hard wired differently. The damage to these children begins with multi-generational issues of dysfunction and carries through to a lack of trust and bonding in infancy. This then morphs into difficult toddlers and unmanageable older kids. Add to this a stressed out, mentally unstable parent and tragedy is a given.

I've parented a houseful of "challenging" and "at-risk" children for over 20 years. These are children taken by court order from situations very similar to this story. I chose to do this. It didn't all fall down around me because of deficits in my own life. If I didn't have a great marriage, loving extended family, supportive friends, engaged teachers, caring therapists, responsive police and judicial system, I couldn't do it. I might have stepped over the precipice and become abusive. I can't tell you how many times I've been raged at, spit on, assaulted, called every name in the book. I've spent my life in school meetings, therapy offices, ERs, juvenile court. We parent in a specialized milieu style, processing everything, teaching consequences...all while making our family look as close to "normal" as possible.

I've made certain to be mindful of my own needs and of my marriage. When I'm in trouble, I've called for help and gotten it. I've taken time-outs. I know how to "work" the system and get services in a timely manner. I know the police chief's and DA's phone numbers by memory. I can look at a problem and come up with viable solutions.

In other words, I don't resort to locking a child that irritated me in a closet. I would like to honestly admit that I've entertained the thought, though. Does that make me shameful? I think it shows that I'm human. I try hard to do the right thing. I also strive to have a respected reputation with the professionals I work with. I do my level best to not take things personally and to stay calm in the face of chaos. And, most importantly, I'm fortunate to not have personal demons I fight off everyday which could cause me to stumble and do the unthinkable.

I am not for a single second defending this monster of a mother. She set this in motion. She did the unforgivable. She's obviously sick and demented and pushed beyond her limits to parent in a reasonable way. She must pay for her crime. I'm simply trying to help others who have not lived in homes with difficult or "different" or even too many children grasp that most parents do not get up in the morning thinking, "how can I hurt my child today?" (Note I said most)

When the rent is late, you just got laid off, you can't afford the drugs (legal or illegal) you need, the toilet's clogged, your spouse/partner got drunk and slugged you, the stray cat just had kittens in the bathroom, the pantry's empty, the neighbors' dog is barking, the police keep trying to serve you with a warrant, the baby's crying and just will NOT stop, and the teenager gets mouthy....what are you going to do? Quick...what are you going to do?

Granted, people are responsible for the messes they make of their lives and often children get caught in the middle. People make horrid mistakes when under pressure. They often get stuck and keep repeating their mistakes when they are triggered. And children get hurt and neglected and their souls and bodies wounded.

One of the most powerful statements I learned in all my years of attending trainings in specialized parenting in reference to the parents of abused/neglected children is "their reality is not your reality". I think of that often when I read yet another of these horror stories of a child who is burned or beaten or shaken or tied up or locked in a closet. Folks, we don't live in this woman's reality. I abhor what she did to her child but the "perfect storm" of abuse presented itself at this poor boy's conception. Talented or special needs, he deserved love and protection. He didn't get it. His mother failed him.

We, as a society have to figure out how to halt this process. We can't just keep cleaning up the messes. How many brain-damaged babies and bruised teens can we all accept? We know that many many of these children will not heal and will be stuck in a never-ending cycle of repeating the sins of their mothers and fathers. I don't have the answers but I do know that children are hurting.

First MissIzzy I want to thank you for you service of your children. I can say that I know how difficult it would be, but I wouldn't really know I can only imagine it. But thank you for taking them in and for doing the work. You also are a very effective advocate. You have the experience and background to speak with some authority about the realities of picking up where other parents have failed. So thank you for that also.

erynne936
10-20-2009, 08:04 AM
i should have added "possible scenario" and "moo" at the end of my post i guess. didn't mean to offend or say that what i wrote was definitely the case here or for all parents and children everywhere.

believe09
10-20-2009, 08:59 AM
MissIzzy, you are more compassionate than I. I agree that it is likely that this mom lacked the capacity to care for her children either because of internal limitations or externally induced ones.

But here's the thing-unless she is of a childlike mentality, we know what causes babies these days. So if she lacked the capacity to deal with her children, the solution that was best for THEM was for her to put them where they were going to be safe. And nurtured. I would think that the most basic parenting skills would indicate that the closet was not where the child belonged. Beyond that, a mind that could create a sugar water insect torture for the child is a mind that had capacity. She could create the scenario and a likely outcome-then she had the ability to reason why this child was better off with someone else. Not to mention the other 6. Not to mention the 2 year old who was starved to death.

On the surface, and I only have media reports to go by, this is a person who is a risk to all children she would carry in the future and is a good case for some kind of sterilization.

Off my soapbox now.

Salem
10-20-2009, 12:40 PM
Sick. I hope and pray that he can find a loving family that will take him in and treat him well.

I hope the officers from the National Guard will stay in touch with him. Just affirm for the child that he did the right thing, he is worthy of positive human contact and admiration. I guess I don't really know how to explain what I'm thinking. I just think if the officers can stay in touch with him, check on him, see how he is doing, it will help the boy replenish his self-worth.

Does that make any sense?

Salem

Texas Mist
01-08-2010, 02:42 PM
OKLAHOMA CITY -- A 15-year-old boy said his mother and a friend of hers beat him, tied him up and even set him on fire over a 4-year period simply because they thought he was "stealing" food from her family's kitchen.

LaRhonda McCall and Steve Vern Hamilton have been charged with felony child abuse and have pleaded not guilty. A judge held a hearing Wednesday to determine whether they should face trial.

In his unemotional testimony, the boy said he has gained 42 pounds since escaping from the home back on Sept. 25. The teen testified he was beaten four times a week since he was 11-years-old with extension cords, pots, and hands and was bound and locked in a closet for days. The boy also said he was forced to stand on ice naked while he was tied up in the garage.

more here

http://www.newson6.com/Global/story.asp?S=11777387


OKLAHOMA CITY -- A teenager testified in Oklahoma County court Wednesday showing the judge his scars as he told about years of abuse. The 15-year-old was unemotional in the preliminary hearing as he explained how his mother LaRhonda McCall and her Friend Steve Hamilton allegedly abused and neglected him over 4 years. During the testimony, McCall shook her head several times.

The boy grew up in New Jersey in the custody of his mother's cousin. He says when he was 10 he was told he was coming to Oklahoma for a visit.

He says he was left here and the abuse began around his eleventh birthday.

The teen told the court McCall and Hamilton accused him of stealing food or money from the family and punished him in various ways.

He says the two withheld food, tied him up, locked him in a closet for several days, beat him with various materials, and hit him in the head with a tire iron and that his mom doused him with rubbing alcohol once before setting him on fire.


more here

http://www.kfor.com/news/local/kfor-news-child-abuse-charges-story,0,5041056.story



According to the boy, who is now in foster care, his mother and Hamilton would use twine, a telephone cord or plastic ties to bind him, whichever was handy, and put him in a closet, the boy said, lifting his arms toward the judge.

"Sometimes they would leave me in there for a couple of nights before I got free," he said.

Half-siblings would risk punishment by sneaking him food while their mother was away, he said in a cold, unemotional courtroom recitation.

"I remember her saying 'Die' and that she regretted having me," Bernell McCall testified, telling the judge that his mother and Hamilton often choked him until he passed out.

...

"All of a sudden I was in a blue flame," Bernell McCall testified. He said he had many scars on his upper legs but didn't show them to the judge.

Other items used as weapons against him included an extension cord, a two-by-four, a bike chain and a car jack.

At one point, he said, his mother and Hamilton tied him to a ladder in the garage and covered him with sugar water. "The sugar attracted the bugs in the garage. They started to bite me." At other times he was put out in the snow naked.

more here

http://hosted2.ap.org/TNMAR/nationandworld/Article_2010-01-07-US-Child-Imprisoned/id-p6106d6aa05294f5e8b8a930b3afd93b1



I really wanna smack this boy's uncle for saying he believes his sister, LaRhonda, for now :furious: :furious: :furious: .....amazing - the boy has scars & has gained 40+ lbs since he got away from that <modsnip> of a mom & her "friend" Hamilton.

The gall of anyone saying he's making this stuff up!! :furious:

Missizzy
01-08-2010, 07:56 PM
Thanks for bringing us up to date, Texas Mist. I can't decide how I feel about the lack of emotionality by the young boy. He's either "boxing" it up or he's affected by spectrum disorder IMO. I would think that he's been doing a lot of work with a therapist and would really doubt that he'd be able to relate this story without tears. I doubt that the judge would allow him to disassociate if that weren't his normal way of communicating.

I'm going to have to say that he's somewhere on the spectrum IMO. That would explain a lot to me. It would explain why his mother couldn't deter him from certain actions, why he didn't fight back more, why this went on for as long as it did. Of course, the child needed food. Of course, he needed love and his freedom. I'm just really wondering if something about his demeanor didn't set his mother off. Please understand that I think she should have immediately gotten help if it did. She committed horrendous crimes against this boy and I hope she grows old inside the prison walls.

However, something strikes me as odd in his lack of emotion. Just the mere act of testifying is frightening. He's relating some very personal and traumatic events. I don't think he'd be allowed to testify if he were so profoundly traumatized by relating the events to the court that he was disassociating. If he has spectrum disorder (Asperger's or some form of Autism) he would be very concrete and honest and detailed about the abuse. However, his spirit wouldn't be as damaged as a normally developing child IMO. Three of my children who were abused are on the spectrum. Each of their testimonies lacked emotion. It was very matter of fact and almost sounded rote. Like they were discussing what they ate for dinner last Tuesday. They, and seemingly, this boy, seem to lack the social understanding of how horrific this crime is...of the full ramifications. Once the pain stops, they pick up the pieces and move on. This is simplistic, of course, and everyone with this disorder/difference is unique but this was my experience and what I'm sensing in the reports I'm reading about this case. This child deserves to have his needs met with compassion. He deserves to be cherished and loved. He deserves justice, whatever his view of the crime was then or now.

Isn't it sad that I'm attempting to rationalize a neuro-difference for him so that I can process this heinous crime? This one is a hard one for me.

Texas Mist
12-04-2010, 02:23 PM
OKLAHOMA CITY (AP) - An Oklahoma City woman charged with locking her teenage son in a closet and beating him has pleaded guilty to multiple child abuse and neglect charges.

Prosecutors say 38-year-old LaRhonda Marie McCall entered a blind plea Friday to 33 counts of child abuse and three counts of child neglect.

Assistant Oklahoma County District Attorney Scott Rowland says a blind plea means McCall has no deal with prosecutors and is throwing herself on the court's mercy. She faces up to life in prison.

more here

http://www.newson6.com/Global/story.asp?S=13616441

Finally! Now if the judge will do the right thing.

And not just her - the co-defendant Steve Hamilton needs cold hard justice heaped on him, too.

Salem
12-05-2010, 12:50 AM
This woman starved a 2-year old to death! http://www.kfor.com/news/local/kfor-news-child-abuse-charges-story,0,5041056.story

For LaRhonda McCall, these new charges follow a felony conviction from 1996 in New York (http://www.kfor.com/topic/us/new-york-PLGEO100100800000000.topic).

In that case, she was found guilty of second degree manslaughter in the death of her 2-year-old daughter. Prosecutors in that case alleged McCall essentially starved the toddler.

How did she get out of jail to continue to reproduce and torture children??????

Missizzy
12-06-2010, 12:16 AM
I've never ever forgotten this boy. This was the very first case on WS which I became really passionate about. I am so hopeful that this young man is in a safe place and on a path of healing.

Shelby2
06-05-2011, 12:24 AM
http://www.koco.com/r/26571257/detail.html

''A woman who threw herself on the mercy of the court after being accused of abusing her teenage son has been sentenced to two life terms for child abuse.''