TN - Gail Nowacki Palmgren, 44, Signal Mountain, 30 April 2011 - #3

10EC_Dad said:

But never call 911?

Click to expand...

Didn't have time?

fbx said:

Another thing about Gail's mental state, which may not mean anything, but if you are a mom, you know what it's like to get both/all your kids ready for 2 different overnight trips without them forgetting anything, and how hectic and stressful that can be.
A few weeks before She went missing, Gail managed to do this whilst under the added stress her marriage was causing her...and also apparently her deteriorating mental condition....
AND she also took time to consider the possible conditions on one of the trips, and then to think not just of her own child, but of all the other kids, and went to the trouble of finding and providing some just-in-case equipment for them, without which all would have been absolutely miserable.

Just an example of the kind of person she is...and how lucid her thoughts were around this time-frame of personal troubles.

Click to expand...

I forget, are you one of the people posting as someone who actually knows her?

10EC_Dad said:

I think we must consider Matt's remarks that she has left before. Her recent actions do give some validity to his assertion that she has had emotional issues.

I think she was a very stressed and confused woman. It seems her life was unraveling. She felt he was having an affair and she was alone. He had a job and she lost hers. Was she concerned that should lose the kids in a divorce?

I hope she will be found safe but I fear otherwise.

Click to expand...

<modsnip> What man files for a separation from his wife while she goes missing, what man files for sole custody of his children while a wife goes missing or asks to take sole possession of the family residence let alone thinks he needs a restraining order from this said wife when you're implying there is no proof said abuse? Why would this husband need a restraining order in the first place? Just because Gail lost her job doesn't mean her husband is better than her. Have you seen the unemployment rate nationally lately. Millions are losing their jobs at no fault of their own. You're coming across as if it was Gail's fault she lost her job and do you know that to be fact? NO! I was a damn good wife and I waited on my husband hand and foot and in the end he admitted to everyone I was a good wife, but he found someone else that was more exciting than me which whom ended up being his 5th wife, but that didn't stop him from trying to have me knocked off, stalked, run off mountain roads, etc to get me out of the way. Hell no it didn't stop him and I wasn't a mental case either, but boy was I hurt that anyone that I once loved could stoop so low as to do this to me and my children. Read all the crimes commited that are discussed on these forums and then you have someone start stalking you and you tell me you wouldn't be nervous. Its only natural for Gail to be scared. <modsnip>

fbx said:

Loosing her job is really a non-issue...Gail was enjoying being a full time mom 100%. Loving it. The whole dept. was affected since after restructuring it didn't exist. This lay off was not a performance based issue and looking for another job was something she laughed at the thought of several times in my hearing.

wondering why would you say, "...and she was alone" ?

Click to expand...

For a professional, losing a job is a big issue. If she wanted to be a full time mom she could have quit her job.

Did she have another relationship with a man?

10EC_Dad said:

But never call 911?

Click to expand...

That is a very, very valid point on the idea of a situation where she felt she was in imminent danger.

However, I don't think we have proof her cell phone definitely was with her. All we have is the cell phone ping that makes me think "Probably" and then the credit cards and license left at home that makes me think "Maybe not".

MacGyver said:

What makes me even more sad--and mad--is that there was absolutely no search until last Saturday--3 weeks later!!! If she did have an accident on those curvy backcountry roads, she could have needed help and it never came.

Please help us find Gail Marie!!!

Click to expand...

Yes. That's the absolute worst part. Nightmares about having driven past her when she most needed help, are keeping sleep at bay most nights since. Then waking up with the anger attached to the why-no-looking ,finishes off the rest of the night...

10EC_Dad said:

I am not dissagreeing with you but I would like to see a link where LE has found him in a contridiction.

Click to expand...

Dad, I don't think you will find much to quote by Matthew. He doesn't have a lot to say. Therefore not much in the way of contradiction. Matter of fact he does not respond to even defend himself against the many accusations. Rumor is rampant. And yes it is acknowledged here that it is rumor. His lack of action and the little action he has made only makes him more suspicious.

I don't think that you have ever experienced abuse of any kind! Lucky you. A lot of us here have been in abusive situations. They are not all alike and often for reasons that are really really hard to explain many victims hide the abuse. Many of us go to great lengths to protect our abusers sometimes. It is not something you are real proud of later when you come to your senses or are forced to face reality. Most of the time the abused really love their abusers (or think they do) and are afraid they will lose them. What does this have to do with Gail or this case? When one has experienced this 1st hand, they tend to recognize certain signs. This case has it written all over it in my opinion. We could be wrong and most on this thread have all admitted this, but things do not look good for Gail. And the evidence when you read all the way from front to back point more and more to this. Point out something to give me hope that I am wrong. Please.

10EC_Dad said:

I think we must consider Matt's remarks that she has left before. Her recent actions do give some validity to his assertion that she has had emotional issues.

I think she was a very stressed and confused woman. It seems her life was unraveling. She felt he was having an affair and she was alone. He had a job and she lost hers. Was she concerned that should lose the kids in a divorce?

I hope she will be found safe but I fear otherwise.

Click to expand...

She would be concerned if he was driving her crazy, making her think things were in fact different than they actually were. Sounds controlling and manipulative and happens every day. Setting up this scenario of her mental instability IMHO could work if over a period, but I do not think it was about custody. This would fit into the 'driving away upset and unsure what to think anymore' accident scenario for GP.

I think the helicopter fly-over of Life force may give some answers, if not, the woods are in full spring/summer foliage, it is hot and not safe in many areas.

I think we need to be really careful about how we judge Matt based on his press appearance and what he's said to the media. There is no right way to act in this situation, especially when the missing is someone you're trying to divorce anyways.

I think we need to look at his actions more.

TheDoormouse said:

That is a very, very valid point on the idea of a situation where she felt she was in imminent danger.

However, I don't think we have proof her cell phone definitely was with her. All we have is the cell phone ping that makes me think "Probably" and then the credit cards and license left at home that makes me think "Maybe not".

Click to expand...

But didn't she stop at the house?

Didn't a neighbor see her leave the house? Did the neighbor see another car? From accounts here, she is smart. Why leave the kids alone? Why not alert the neighbor?

10EC_Dad said:

But didn't she stop at the house?

Didn't a neighbor see her leave the house? Did the neighbor see another car? From accounts here, she is smart. Why leave the kids alone? Why not alert the neighbor?

Click to expand...

I'm not the person who was arguing she dropped the kids off because of a person following her.


and I agree. It seems very unlikely she dropped the kids off BECAUSE someone was following her. I couldn't imagine a mother leaving a 9 and 12 year old alone in the house and HOPE the bad guy comes for her instead.

also we don't have proof she didn't contact LE in the weeks before about a guy following her. LE is being very secretive, and I highly doubt in a place this hush-hush the first thing LE would do is tell the media "welp, she mentioned something about a car to us, but we blew her off"

redfish said:

Dad, I don't think you will find much to quote by Matthew. He doesn't have a lot to say. Therefore not much in the way of contradiction. Matter of fact he does not respond to even defend himself against the many accusations. Rumor is rampant. And yes it is acknowledged here that it is rumor. His lack of action and the little action he has made only makes him more suspicious.

I don't think that you have ever experienced abuse of any kind! Lucky you. A lot of us here have been in abusive situations. They are not all alike and often for reasons that are really really hard to explain many victims hide the abuse. Many of us go to great lengths to protect our abusers sometimes. It is not something you are real proud of later when you come to your senses or are forced to face reality. Most of the time the abused really love their abusers (or think they do) and are afraid they will lose them. What does this have to do with Gail or this case? When one has experienced this 1st hand, they tend to recognize certain signs. This case has it written all over it in my opinion. We could be wrong and most on this thread have all admitted this, but things do not look good for Gail. And the evidence when you read all the way from front to back point more and more to this. Point out something to give me hope that I am wrong. Please.

Click to expand...

You obviously are not aware of my past.

Thanks for sharing the background of many here. That gives me a better insight to their posts.

I try to view things objectively and see each case by it own merits.

MacGyver said:

One of my colleagues is from Chattanooga and her father lives on SM. He has told her on the Mountain, they think MP is strange and there is something not right about him.

I've known him 15 years and always thought he was a great guy--he has even been a guest in my home on multiple occasions. However, as many of us have stated, no one knows what goes on behind closed doors.

One question . . . there are many of us on GP's side who talk about the Gail we know. Am I the only one who finds it strange that no one has said anything positive in the media about MP? Even before he lawyered up?

Click to expand...

I think (JMHO) it's because he does not seem to be actively looking for her.

Have talked to several people about this because, as you said, marital problems aside...he seems to be a great guy. These are people who have been through a terrible time with spousal drug and alcohol abuse and child custody nightmares. All say that no matter how much they might wish their ex-spouse off the planet, if they went missing they would without hesitation start an active and aggressive search because....how could they not do this for their children?
Also...when did he lawyer up?...it was before the media were interested and very shortly after April 30th.

fbx said:

I think (JMHO) it's because he does not seem to be actively looking for her.

Have talked to several people about this because, as you said, marital problems aside...he seems to be a great guy. These are people who have been through a terrible time with spousal drug and alcohol abuse and child custody nightmares. All say that no matter how much they might wish their ex-spouse off the planet, if they went missing they would without hesitation start an active and aggressive search because....how could they not do this for their children?
Also...when did he lawyer up?...it was before the media were interested and very shortly after April 30th.

Click to expand...

The separation filing was made May 6. The divorce atty is a criminal defense attorney. So the earliest we know for certain he retained an attorney is 5-6-11.

We also know that he does have a PI looking for clues and information over at Arlene Dunham's house.

I have a very close family friend with a somewhat similar situation.. Infact the more I learn.. The more I think on it the more the two are eerily alike..

She no longer works, husband is full breadwinner making very good money they have a daughter 12 and son 9.. She has found out that there has been an affair and tho from the outside her husband seems to be one of the good guys, even I would have attested a year ago that he was a great guy and good family and marriage but now I know different.

She fears him and tho has yet to be physically violent he is extremely verbally and emotionally abusive and there have been 911 calls during these verbal abuses. She knows that the marriage has to end not healthy for the kids to be raised in home where mom is very verbally and emotionally abused.. Little by little she has been doing these exact things Gail was.. Giving several of us different things to hold onto..proof of the affairs, important docs such as her birth certificate, passport, kids passports, receipts, and yes even cash..

She is suffering emotionally quite terribly and her doctor has her on two medicines, neither of which would indicate instability but rather medications to help her get through this nightmare which she knows has barely begun.. As she just recently began meeting with an ATTY..

She too had a very very strong suspicion that she was being followed and yes even began to question was she being paranoid.. Fact is she wasn't.. Her instincts were dead on and he was having her followed 24/7 and her cell tapped.. Things have gone from bad to worse as he confronted her as soon as he was told that she had been to see an ATTY .. He has threatened her life and for the time being she is still there but has a separate phone to communicate with us on and he is completely unaware of all the important docs and money that she has given us for safe keeping.. Her plan is to let things cool back down and she feels that once he gets back to traveling alot of out of town for biz that shell resume her little by little getting things in order so that she can leave and divorce him.. Her main thing that she has to have are his docs from the biz he owns as he's not claiming his correct income. Infact is claiming such a small amt that it woulnt allow for her to provide for her children even the most basic of needs.. This is why she says she can't leave until she gets the documentTion of what his true income is..

We fear for her greatly now knowing the truth if just what goes in behind their closed doors but not even the most slightest bit do any of us for one second believe that her reasons for giving us the important items to hold onto indicate that she would commit suicide, that she is an unstable individual, or that she's gonna take off and leave the kids with her husband..

They're indicative of the complete opposite.. Preparation for a contested divorce against a man who she knows is gonna be hell to go thru a divorce from and that she is attempting to have as many ducks in a row as she possibly can before the world war 3 begins..

IMO I see Gail and her actions much the same way.. Indicative of an intelligent woman with a logical head on her shoulders that is doing her best to prepare for that horrendous battle that is inevitably going to come..

And IMO it's quite likely that MP saw this too that GP was gearing up for that divorce and well we all know that a good amd large sum of money would be leaving MPs bank account each and every month of every year for the next decade.. That alone is more than enough motive and in fact sadly has become extremely frequent when speaking of husbands killng their wives for these very reasons..

Of course there is the chance that Gail just happened to cross paths with something nefarious that is completely unrelated to MP or just to have crossed paths with a fate that tragically and accidentally took her life. I think many of us always know these are possibilities in the many cases such As Gail's and the reality of the chances of it being something completely unrelated are slim to none.. She feats someone is following her.. She has a marriage that has come apart at the seams with a pending divorce and is already preparing by giving those items of importance for her fam/friends to hold onto to use in those divorce proceedings.. Yet something absolutely unrelated took Gails life??

As I said slim to none..

TheDoormouse said:

I'm not the person who was arguing she dropped the kids off because of a person following her.


and I agree. It seems very unlikely she dropped the kids off BECAUSE someone was following her. I couldn't imagine a mother leaving a 9 and 12 year old alone in the house and HOPE the bad guy comes for her instead.

Click to expand...

I concur. But it does make me think that perhaps the person following her was not the person threatening her, if she was in fact being threatened and left out of fear.

Interesting that she had made arrangements to meet her dh at the house with the kids, but was compelled to leave them before he got there and leave in a hurry. My knee jerk is that she did not want to see her dh, but was honoring the arrangement for some reason.

That could support leaving on her own accord/leaving out of fear of something/being involved in an accident due to being distraught/being harmed either by a stranger or someone known to her.

10EC_Dad said:

For a professional, losing a job is a big issue. If she wanted to be a full time mom she could have quit her job.

Did she have another relationship with a man?

Click to expand...

You're right about being able to quit her job anytime for full time mom-dom. The thing is though, that being a very successful professional she wouldn't have really considered it...BUT when it happened, she quickly figured our that being a full time mom is a fabulous gift to be treasured and enjoyed while you can!!!

I'm not aware of any other relationship....find it hard to believe though.
I asked why you thought she felt that she was alone for a very specific reason.
You should have noticed by now though, that she had many people around her that care for her and in whom she has a great deal of trust. Her sister and Brother-in-law have sacrificed 3 weeks of their lives so far in an attempt to locate her...what of their jobs and lives at home?

MacGyver said:

What makes me even more sad--and mad--is that there was absolutely no search until last Saturday--3 weeks later!!! If she did have an accident on those curvy backcountry roads, she could have needed help and it never came.

Please help us find Gail Marie!!!

Click to expand...

You are sooooo right!!!!!!!
IMHO whatever the circumstance (took off, foul play, whatever) why didn't LE at least LOOOK?

KWIM

:>)

JBean said:

I concur. But it does make me think that perhaps the person following her was not the person threatening her, if she was in fact being threatened and left out of fear.

Interesting that she had made arrangements to meet her dh at the house with the kids, but was compelled to leave them before he got there and leave in a hurry. My knee jerk is that she did not want to see her dh, but was honoring the arrangement for some reason.

That could support leaving on her own accord/leaving out of fear of something/being involved in an accident due to being distraught/being harmed either by a stranger or someone known to her.

Click to expand...

JBean, she did seem to be keeping her part of a "bargain". She agreed to return the next day. hmmmm okay. But Arlene says they had plans that day, made the night before. hmmmmmm. A late night phone call? Wish we could see phone record!

Okay she arrives home in record time. Unloads kids. No husband in sight. Puts Purse/ID on counter.... talks to sister on phone.... What happened that she rushes back off leaving her ID behind? Rushes right past Suzie without even acknowledging her "arm waving" What in the world? Something frightened her? Husband says he spoke to her on the phone. hmmmmm Did they make a plan to meet somewhere private where the kids would not hear? Did someone call and say something happened to Grandma or Matthew? Sure wish we had that phone record.