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  1. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by thebear14 View Post
    yeah I've actually been meaning to mention that Phoebe had plans to wear a spaghetti strap black dress to cotillion - again, not a dress I would wear if I was a cutter. Cutters tend to want to hide their scars - not show them off.
    Excellent memory, that's right. Sadly, that's also the dress she they used for her services.

  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by Laurence View Post
    True... but timewise that's at Villiers (the boarding school in Ireland) and the photo would be 7th grade or so (and I am pretty sure she was pulled out and went to her mothers school for 8th grade, the year before they came to the US). So it may pre-date alleged cutting problems (which as of now there is no evidence of, just accusations from bully supporters in SH).
    Beautiful pictures, Lawrence...I think you put that one up, eh? I received from a person who cares, some beautiful new images of pics we had and put them on the photo thread, today. I received a tutorial on posting pics...and what do you know? I did it! I think I'm going to add an email link to my posts so if people have any pics or info, they can anonymously email, too...as soon as I figure out how... I saw adnoid has one...I want one, too...lol...

    PS>>>NO idea how that angry smilie got there!!! And I don't know how to take it off...lol...oh, well...
    Last edited by daisy7; 04-24-2010 at 05:09 PM. Reason: deleted angry smilie -- LOL


    “In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.”

    Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

  3. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by thebear14 View Post
    yeah I've actually been meaning to mention that Phoebe had plans to wear a spaghetti strap black dress to cotillion - again, not a dress I would wear if I was a cutter. Cutters tend to want to hide their scars - not show them off.
    DING, DING, DING!

    WE have a WINNER! And for you, thebear14...


    “In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.”

    Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

  4. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paladine View Post
    DING, DING, DING!

    WE have a WINNER! And for you, thebear14...
    why thank you

  5. #35
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    Hi McKEire Thanks for posting.

    Quote Originally Posted by McKEire View Post
    All this media coverage on her essay of "Cutting" is really bothering me. It in no way indicates she was a cutter, and even if she was, that makes it ok for those kids to stalk and harrass her? that makes her suicide ok? It kills me that she is being victimized even in death.
    yeah I agree - it's been bothering me as well. After the first day or two of it I just started to ignore it all because these people just don't get it. First, as you said, just because she wrote an essay on it in no way indicates that she was a cutter and second, even if she was, it definitely doesn't make her being harassed okay or her suicide okay. As far as I'm concerned, nothing Phoebe did makes what they did to her okay, nothing at all.

    Quote Originally Posted by McKEire View Post
    I am so happy to have a place to discuss this case with people that care.
    Phoebe has been on my mind every day since her death. I have never cried over one person so much before, and I didn't even know her. I was a cutter in high school and suicidal as well. I could almost feel her pain, even though I was not bullied to the extent she was.
    yea I agree. I have never been so bothered by someone's death that I didn't know. I only started following this case around a month ago, when the charges came out. I had heard about it before but just kind of brushed it off. For the past month though, the case has consumed me. It's made me very sad, and very angry. It's like I'm in mourning for someone I never knew, and it's very difficult. Luckily we have this forum so we can discuss aspects of the case and how we're feeling and for the most part everyone is very kind and receiving

    also, thanks for sharing your story about also being a cutter and suicidal. I know it's not always an easy thing to talk about. I too was a cutter off and on from around 12-15. It's not generally something I bring up because it's not how I identify myself. However, it was something I went through and dealt with at a young age and I think that's why this particular aspect of the story is making me angry. Too many people are opening their mouths about something they really know nothing about. And although I was a cutter and dealing with some pain and sadness, I was never suicidal. I thought about it at times, but never seriously enough that I would consider myself suicidal. It was never a real plan or thought in my mind. Also, as a cutter, I can tell you I would never have written an essay on cutting that would be seen by my classmates while I was going through it.

    I've mentioned this before, but cutting is a lot more common than most people would think, and it's not just these greatly disturbed, weird kids doing it - it's kids you would never imagine. I say this not because I'm trying to say Phoebe was a cutter, I mean it's possible but like we've been saying, it seems unlikely right now. I say this because I know we've read a lot about how Phoebe seemed fine the day she died and the days proceeding it, besides her getting down about the harassment. Just because she seemed fine on the outside doesn't mean she was okay on the inside. I remember many times acting like a normal silly 14 year old girl at school then coming home and falling apart. You never know what's going on on the inside of someone.

    anyway, sorry for making this a long rambling mess of a post. Just wanted to comment on a few things McKEire said as well as some things that have been swirling around in my head for the past few days.

  6. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paladine View Post
    Hello, Herding Cats Yes. It would be easy to see.

    But it's also irrelevant and a way to divert blame from the perp and place it on the victim, imo...
    I completely agree about it's (ir)relevance...and also agree it's a defense tactic. I guess I'm thinking that in pretrial motions, there would/should be a motion to supress based on evidence (or lack thereof) in re: cutting.

    I feel ever so bad for Phoebe and her family...and keep them in my prayers.

    Best-
    Herding Cats

  7. #37
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    I hate when the defense in a trial puts the victim on trial - by attacking their character. "He/she did such and such", almost like an excuse as to why the perp did what they did.

  8. #38
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    I posted this on the photos thread but thought I'd post it here, as well. It's a good picture, more recent, with arms totally exposed in a shorter dress...and because it's pretty...see the spark in her eyes?
    Attached Images Attached Images
    Last edited by Paladine; 04-25-2010 at 02:13 AM.


    “In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.”

    Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

  9. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paladine View Post
    I posted this on the photos thread but thought I'd post it here, as well. It's a good picture, more recent, with arms totally exposed in a shorter dress...and because it's pretty...see the spark in her eyes?
    very pretty

    I actually found out that picture isn't that recent - it was taken while she was still in Ireland. It may be about a year old but wasn't taken in America as I originally thought.

  10. #40
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    I have yet to even see a scrape on her body. And whoever brought up the fact that they would see the scars at the autopsy THANK YOU! You are right, all of that would have to be recorded and marked.


  11. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by thebear14 View Post
    very pretty

    I actually found out that picture isn't that recent - it was taken while she was still in Ireland. It may be about a year old but wasn't taken in America as I originally thought.
    Thanks, bear...and good morning, to you...


    “In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.”

    Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

  12. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by redsky View Post
    I hate when the defense in a trial puts the victim on trial - by attacking their character. "He/she did such and such", almost like an excuse as to why the perp did what they did.
    I can't wait to hear what Phoebe did that allowed Sean to block the library door so she couldn't leave while the others taunted her. Or what she did that allowed Longe to throw the can at her.

    There are some people I don't like. I'm planning on taking notes on what it is exactly somebody has to do to suddenly make things that are improper, immoral and illegal to suddenly become allowable. So I can, you know, get away with it too. (/sarcasm)


  13. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by redsky View Post
    I have yet to even see a scrape on her body. And whoever brought up the fact that they would see the scars at the autopsy THANK YOU! You are right, all of that would have to be recorded and marked.
    And if there are any leaks as to the autopsy to the press/defense/town in general then somebody needs to get in serious trouble.

  14. #44
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    I read yesterday about cigarette burns too. She supposedly showed up to school with them the day she died. I think it was that Irish Central article. Let me see if I can find it somewhere.

    It was that drudge report not Irish Central.
    Last edited by WaddupYo; 04-27-2010 at 11:31 AM.

  15. #45
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    Angry

    Quote Originally Posted by Laurence View Post
    I can't wait to hear what Phoebe did that allowed Sean to block the library door so she couldn't leave while the others taunted her. Or what she did that allowed Longe to throw the can at her.

    There are some people I don't like. I'm planning on taking notes on what it is exactly somebody has to do to suddenly make things that are improper, immoral and illegal to suddenly become allowable. So I can, you know, get away with it too. (/sarcasm)


    The question in my mind when I read those parts in the indictment documents was: why did the DA not charge them with unlawful restraint/kidnapping?

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