Baker Family Dynamics

Capri

Active Member
Joined
Aug 20, 2008
Messages
4,776
Reaction score
89
Between EB & AB, EB seems to be the more dominant one.EB is 42 yrs. old & AB is 31. Would be interesting to know AB's family dynamics with his mother Karen. We know Karen told her friend in AU that AB had left the country with Z and his new wife and she didn't know where they were (for some time at least). We also know that ED, Z's biomom asked for Karen's assistance in finding Z & AB & Karen refused. Lots of games going on in this family. Also EB's daughter mentioned that the family had been distanced for the last year or so because of a dispute over money EB owed her father.


In a Catawba County courtroom Wednesday, Amber Fairchild, 25, described her mother, Elisa Baker, as a potentially violent and unstable woman who has severed ties with her N.C. family and begun an online relationship with a man in London.

Read more: http://www.charlotteobserver.com/20...calls-give-parents-version.html#ixzz15YUWPqWz
 
I think Ab has always relied on take charge women in his life to handle the messier or less convenient details in life for him. It is my impression that his mom, KB, was the primary caregiver of little Z when she lived in Aus. I get the distinct impression that EB was charged with that job once here in the states.

I also get the impression that KB has been AB's enabler all his life. I am not saying she is a terrible person or anything of the sort. Just that I feel she has helped him avoid growing up in many ways by shouldering a lot of things for him throughout his life and the result is the meek, mild, seemingly clueless AB we see today. That may also explain how he could so completely (apparently) give over the wearing of the pants to a dominating, manipulating personality such as EB's.

All of the above is just little ole my opinion.
 
Where to start without getting a TO. We need a boat load of phiz-eh-key-eh-trists (said in my best Ricky Ricardo voice) for this bunch. Well, I could not find those, so this will have to do...running from Ducky now.


[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8E8trKZGbE"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8E8trKZGbE[/ame]
 
Im not sure if this is where I should be putting this if not mods please move or delete.
Im going to try to start from the beginning so this might get long winded sorry in advance.

Kb gives birth to AB. Shes a mom who loves her children and does everything to raise them with love and support. possibly overbearing.
Along comes beautiful ED. Her and AB are young and in love. She gives birth to Zahra. Everyone is instantly in love with this child. Things are hard on the young family, they split up and go seperate ways. Its overbearing on ED who suffers from PPD. She gives Zahra to her dad to make her safe. AB and KB are both upset with ED over the split up causing bad feelings between them.
AB and Zahra move in with KB. She wants to protect them both. KB makes AB feel Zahra is better off without ED in her life.
Zahra gets sick. This makes KB even more protective of her. AB works hard to give his daughter a good life. Hes alone and spends his evenings online.
He meets EB. He develops feeling for this woman who is giving him attention, making him feel loved and needed. EB goes to OZ. Shes doesnt look like the pics but oh well her feelings are what hes after.
AB marries EB who shows love and is making him feel like a man. Shes treating Zahra well, she butts heads with his mom. EB convinces him KB is running his life They go to the USA and get away from KB. This causes a fued with KB. They cut off ties.
This finds them in NC. They move in with EBs father. Life is AB cant find work because hes not a citizen. EB has way to many ailments to work. Bills add up, tention starts with EBs dad. AB not feeling very manly. EB uses this to get the upper hand in the relationship.
They get there own place. Times are hard. EB says we can write checks to get by Ive done it for years . We can sell a few drugs to get by too. Eb starts being mean to Zahra and hides the worst from AB. AB is having doubts but hes stuck in US with no money, he sees things he doesnt like but EB cant be all that bad her kids and "brother" are around alot.
They start having fights over money. BB doesnt pay them the money they need. EB convinces AB that BB and Boyfriend are threatening her. He goes after them to get the money. EBs saying get them to pull over. He does as she says.
AB finally gets work. Hes gone alot but hes finally feeling like a man. He leaves early gets home late. Doesnt get to see his daughter much but EB keeps him filled in on her and things will slow down at work during the winter and he can spend time with Zahra then.
This senario shows how he could be led by the women in his life. I dont know if hes guilty or not time will tell. JMO
 
*runs over and takes plate of brownies away from Teh*
 
I think KB is extremely controlling and possessive. I don't think ED had a chance once she got together with Adam, and especially once she became pregnant and gave birth to Zahra. I think Adam is well and truly under KB's thumb and always has be which is just how she likes it, the only time he seems to have rebelled is when EB wanted him and Zahra to move back to NC with her.

Now look what's happened.

So Adam has conceded and repositioned himself back under KB's thumb. Just as it should be in KB's mind.
 
Im not sure if this is where I should be putting this if not mods please move or delete.
Im going to try to start from the beginning so this might get long winded sorry in advance.

Kb gives birth to AB. Shes a mom who loves her children and does everything to raise them with love and support. possibly overbearing.
Along comes beautiful ED. Her and AB are young and in love. She gives birth to Zahra. Everyone is instantly in love with this child. Things are hard on the young family, they split up and go seperate ways. Its overbearing on ED who suffers from PPD. She gives Zahra to her dad to make her safe. AB and KB are both upset with ED over the split up causing bad feelings between them.
AB and Zahra move in with KB. She wants to protect them both. KB makes AB feel Zahra is better off without ED in her life.
Zahra gets sick. This makes KB even more protective of her. AB works hard to give his daughter a good life. Hes alone and spends his evenings online.
He meets EB. He develops feeling for this woman who is giving him attention, making him feel loved and needed. EB goes to OZ. Shes doesnt look like the pics but oh well her feelings are what hes after.
AB marries EB who shows love and is making him feel like a man. Shes treating Zahra well, she butts heads with his mom. EB convinces him KB is running his life They go to the USA and get away from KB. This causes a fued with KB. They cut off ties.
This finds them in NC. They move in with EBs father. Life is AB cant find work because hes not a citizen. EB has way to many ailments to work. Bills add up, tention starts with EBs dad. AB not feeling very manly. EB uses this to get the upper hand in the relationship.
They get there own place. Times are hard. EB says we can write checks to get by Ive done it for years . We can sell a few drugs to get by too. Eb starts being mean to Zahra and hides the worst from AB. AB is having doubts but hes stuck in US with no money, he sees things he doesnt like but EB cant be all that bad her kids and "brother" are around alot.
They start having fights over money. BB doesnt pay them the money they need. EB convinces AB that BB and Boyfriend are threatening her. He goes after them to get the money. EBs saying get them to pull over. He does as she says.
AB finally gets work. Hes gone alot but hes finally feeling like a man. He leaves early gets home late. Doesnt get to see his daughter much but EB keeps him filled in on her and things will slow down at work during the winter and he can spend time with Zahra then.
This senario shows how he could be led by the women in his life. I dont know if hes guilty or not time will tell. JMO

I agree with your entire post EXCEPTING the BBM portion. No matter how many hours he is working (and we do not know how many or few he's been working lately) and no matter how odd his hours are, I hold him accountable for Zahra's wellbeing and leaving Z for extended periods without setting eyes on her or allowing EB to filter to him info about Z is negligent parenting from someone sleeping under the same roof as his child IMOO.
 
I think KB is extremely controlling and possessive. I don't think ED had a chance once she got together with Adam, and especially once she became pregnant and gave birth to Zahra. I think Adam is well and truly under KB's thumb and always has be which is just how she likes it, the only time he seems to have rebelled is when EB wanted him and Zahra to move back to NC with her.

Now look what's happened.

So Adam has conceded and repositioned himself back under KB's thumb. Just as it should be in KB's mind.

ITA
I think we have seen the Aussie version of Cindy Anthony!
“I’ll stand by my son. It’s really hard to listen to people call him murderers,and a child abuser.But people don’t know,and the police will find out exactly what happened and then we’ll all know the truth.And they all will see that he loved his daughter and she meant the world to him.”KB
I was bracing myself for a statement similar to CA's about AB being Father of the Year when the truth is known-Thank the Lord that didn't happen!! YET!!
 
ITA
I think we have seen the Aussie version of Cindy Anthony!
“I’ll stand by my son. It’s really hard to listen to people call him murderers,and a child abuser.But people don’t know,and the police will find out exactly what happened and then we’ll all know the truth.And they all will see that he loved his daughter and she meant the world to him.”KB
I was bracing myself for a statement similar to CA's about AB being Father of the Year when the truth is known-Thank the Lord that didn't happen!! YET!!

Syrupy wasn't it! I actually think she is worse than CA. Although we don't know how CA would have dealt with similar competition since Caylee's father was not part of the scene. The way Emily was treated is just unbelievable, and I don't believe for a second that AB was the driving force behind that.

KB also seems to have a lot more control over AB than CA had over KC. He seems to willingly follow along passively with her whereas KC at least had some fight in her and rebelled against her mothers control.

Odd.
 
I can certainly see similarities in this mother child dynamic and that of the ICA/CA relationship, but I haven't seen, heard, etc enough from KB or AB to decide if I feel that is an accurate assessment (at least for me) or not yet. Guess time will tell. My gut says mama has run him all his life excpeting when EB was busy running him. But I am not sure about the control factor rivalling CA yet.
 
Where to start without getting a TO. We need a boat load of phiz-eh-key-eh-trists (said in my best Ricky Ricardo voice) for this bunch. Well, I could not find those, so this will have to do...running from Ducky now.


LMBO at your link, Teh!
 
It does seem like fake tears are kinda of an in thing. I didn't see any in her eyes when she acted like she was crying.....hmmmmm.
 
AB saying he wants to bring Zahra home?

http://news.ninemsn.com.au/article.aspx?id=8142856

Appearing alongside his mother Karen, Mr Baker, complained people had yelled "murderer" and "child abuser" at him and said he would like to take Zahra's body back to Australia.

"I think that's where she'd want to be," Mr Baker, a 33-year-old former Queensland sugar mill worker, told North Carolina TV station WBTV.

"She has a lot of friends and a lot of family in Australia that need her to be over there."

She also has a mother AB. Buckle up, I think we're in for a custody battle re; Zahra's remains. I'm backing Emily on this one. The Bakers have seen the last of their dominance and control where Zahra is concerned.
 
Im not sure if this is where I should be putting this if not mods please move or delete.
Im going to try to start from the beginning so this might get long winded sorry in advance.

Kb gives birth to AB. Shes a mom who loves her children and does everything to raise them with love and support. possibly overbearing.
Along comes beautiful ED. Her and AB are young and in love. She gives birth to Zahra. Everyone is instantly in love with this child. Things are hard on the young family, they split up and go seperate ways. Its overbearing on ED who suffers from PPD. She gives Zahra to her dad to make her safe. AB and KB are both upset with ED over the split up causing bad feelings between them.
AB and Zahra move in with KB. She wants to protect them both. KB makes AB feel Zahra is better off without ED in her life.
Zahra gets sick. This makes KB even more protective of her. AB works hard to give his daughter a good life. Hes alone and spends his evenings online.
He meets EB. He develops feeling for this woman who is giving him attention, making him feel loved and needed. EB goes to OZ. Shes doesnt look like the pics but oh well her feelings are what hes after.
AB marries EB who shows love and is making him feel like a man. Shes treating Zahra well, she butts heads with his mom. EB convinces him KB is running his life They go to the USA and get away from KB. This causes a fued with KB. They cut off ties.
This finds them in NC. They move in with EBs father. Life is AB cant find work because hes not a citizen. EB has way to many ailments to work. Bills add up, tention starts with EBs dad. AB not feeling very manly. EB uses this to get the upper hand in the relationship.
They get there own place. Times are hard. EB says we can write checks to get by Ive done it for years . We can sell a few drugs to get by too. Eb starts being mean to Zahra and hides the worst from AB. AB is having doubts but hes stuck in US with no money, he sees things he doesnt like but EB cant be all that bad her kids and "brother" are around alot.
They start having fights over money. BB doesnt pay them the money they need. EB convinces AB that BB and Boyfriend are threatening her. He goes after them to get the money. EBs saying get them to pull over. He does as she says.
AB finally gets work. Hes gone alot but hes finally feeling like a man. He leaves early gets home late. Doesnt get to see his daughter much but EB keeps him filled in on her and things will slow down at work during the winter and he can spend time with Zahra then.
This senario shows how he could be led by the women in his life. I dont know if hes guilty or not time will tell. JMO

Good post!! very believable.

I also think there is a another dynamic here and that is KB is not only into momma bear protective mode but she knows she must share some of the blame for keeping Zahra away from her Bio mom. By believing her son innocent of any wrongdoing she can absolve herself from responsibility.
 
AB saying he wants to bring Zahra home?

http://news.ninemsn.com.au/article.aspx?id=8142856

Appearing alongside his mother Karen, Mr Baker, complained people had yelled "murderer" and "child abuser" at him and said he would like to take Zahra's body back to Australia.

"I think that's where she'd want to be," Mr Baker, a 33-year-old former Queensland sugar mill worker, told North Carolina TV station WBTV.

"She has a lot of friends and a lot of family in Australia that need her to be over there."

Oh, really Dad? It just now occurred to you that Zahra wanted to be back in Australia? That she has lots of friends and family, like <ahem> a MOTHER, for instance, over there?

I'll refrain from adding more, at the risk of making Ducky go

picture.php
 
I think Ab has always relied on take charge women in his life to handle the messier or less convenient details in life for him. It is my impression that his mom, KB, was the primary caregiver of little Z when she lived in Aus. I get the distinct impression that EB was charged with that job once here in the states.

I also get the impression that KB has been AB's enabler all his life. I am not saying she is a terrible person or anything of the sort. Just that I feel she has helped him avoid growing up in many ways by shouldering a lot of things for him throughout his life and the result is the meek, mild, seemingly clueless AB we see today. That may also explain how he could so completely (apparently) give over the wearing of the pants to a dominating, manipulating personality such as EB's.

All of the above is just little ole my opinion.

I couldn't just hit the "thanks" button, just had to say this is EXACTLY how I see it, too!!
 
JMOO I do not see AB as a meek, mild or clueless
If AB was he wouldn't be having a hearing for bad checks and road rage incident.
I do believe his mother KB has ruled the roost.
But I see AB as VERY manipulating also.
I think that AB/KB was abusive and uncaring toward Zahra's mother Emily.
There was a link if I can find it by Emily stating that her PPD was worse by them.
It seems that KB did the raising of Zahra, but I do not see from any pix or video's
of A REAL distraught grandma.
All of a sudden KB and AB are back together like glue.
Why for 2 years was there NO CONTACT???
IMO, I think AB enjoyed his fun and games with Elisa.
2 peas in a pod..........he gets no pass from me.

TIA.
 
"I think that's where she'd want to be," Mr Baker, a 33-year-old former Queensland sugar mill worker, told North Carolina TV station WBTV.

"She has a lot of friends and a lot of family in Australia that need her to be over there."

Well, he certainly chose a fine time to start caring about what Zahra wants... After they've been dismembered you can give your children everything they want because they don't want much any more. :banghead::banghead:
 

Staff online

Members online

Online statistics

Members online
186
Guests online
2,018
Total visitors
2,204

Forum statistics

Threads
590,061
Messages
17,929,621
Members
228,053
Latest member
SweetDreamsAreMadeOfCheez
Back
Top