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  1. #76
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    hollyblue is offline It may be the cock that crows, but it is the hen that lays the eggs.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bee Happy View Post
    I thought her MS posting was much later on Friday? The one about looking forward from now on. I'll have to wait until my son gives me my ipod back to check.
    There was a post on MS saying that on Dec 2nd. (Thursday), but the FB had the other info.

    ETA: Link http://www.myspace.com/tinaldyer/stream
    Last edited by hollyblue; 12-13-2010 at 12:48 AM.


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  3. #77
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    I suspect in coming days when the joy that Brittnay is safe there will be some who's mind wonders of all possibilities.. is her involvement in this.

    I believe, acutally I know she was groomed by him. A man knows it is wrong to have a relationship such as what he did or intended with a 12 year old. He gained her trust..and while gaining trust predators also include putting fear into the victem. The truth is distorted, things get very confusing but after a bit what seemed UNORMAL seems NORMAL.. brainwashing, yes to some extent. To make a person believe what you want them to believe and have them live by it, feel it, obey or go along with it.. adds up to brainwashing and to do that to a 12 year old girl who is looking for acceptance, to be grown up, to perhaps have attention from boys.. he convinces her that love is love and age is no barrier for LOVE.. she buys into it.. not hard to do.. how many of us women believed a two timing liar and honestly believed him until we even as a grown woman or man realized the lies... it take a while. A mind is a very easy thing to minupliate by those who mindset is to accomplish a selfish deed for themself.

    I think that FBI and LE at all levels are dictating what happens including the her relatives coming to get or accompany her back. I would think that they MAY conclude that she would become emotional, perhaps guilty, feel as if they are disapointed or she may just feel overwhelmed with love and just want to block it all out.. I think it is a good idea for cps/fbi and official persons handle this. They know what they are doing.. they need this little girl as fit as she can be to live a happy life and BE A WITNESS for them.. they are treating this a delicate as they can and for good reason. The family knows she is safe.. speaking to them on the phone and probally being directed by LE as to what the family should and shouldnt say.

    The cps and forensic interview and fbi all interviews with the child are done at a slow pace, a formulated proven technique, limited on questions asked.. a question asked is considered at times leading question even when it is not.. even the voice inflection the defense will try and use.

    i hope everyone keeps in mind she is a child and regardless if she went willingly.. she was used by this man over a period of time as part of a horrible plan on his part


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  5. #78
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    deleted (good post above)
    Last edited by Laddsy; 12-13-2010 at 12:38 AM.


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  7. #79
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    Don't forget about the Stockholm Syndrome (think Patti Hearst), where an abductee develops an affiliation with the abductor as they are so dependent upon them for everything they get (food, drink, shelter, companionship).

    Many victims are too afraid to try to escape, out of fear for their own safety or their loved ones (abductor/abuser made threats to harm them).


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  9. #80
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bee Happy View Post
    I thought her MS posting was much later on Friday? The one about looking forward from now on. I'll have to wait until my son gives me my ipod back to check.

    Found it:

    http://www.myspace.com/tinaldyer
    Last edited by finishstrong; 12-13-2010 at 12:45 AM. Reason: Quote deleted


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  11. #81
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    belimom is offline Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter ~MLK Jr
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    Quote Originally Posted by Laddsy View Post
    I cant help but think of the countless chances she would have had to get away. (if she wanted to)
    That's just it... She was groomed -- and she is a child.

    Try to think back to how you thought as a child. I know different people mature or act differently at different ages. But at some point, we all still thought that we HAD to do what our parents and other adults said. We didn't realize we had a choice - almost like training elephants in the circus (put a huge chain on the baby elephant, they can't break free, they stop trying; put nice little cutesy rope on adult elephant b/c chain is no longer needed and rope looks better to the spectators). Same principle. I keep waiting for the day when my own children get old enough to realize that they don't have to do what we say. Sure, they pitch fits and don't always listen/obey immediately. But in the big scheme of things, they still look to us to control their lives. They don't realize that we don't have a big chain on them - it's all in their heads b/c they're children. I think Brittany is still at the stage of doing what an adult says b/c 'adults are in charge'. PLUS, she had been groomed. PLUS, she may have seen JE kill and/or beat her mom: she KNEW what he was capable of doing to her if he got angry with her.
    Fly high and free, Jhessye ~

    My posts are meant to help think through possibilities and are strictly an additional opinion under circumstances when many points of view need to be considered. I apologize in advance to anyone whose potential involvement is contemplated in error. Please understand that much of what is happening is merely brainstorming during unfortunate events.


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  13. #82
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    belimom is offline Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter ~MLK Jr
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    Just a reminder: do not quote from her MS or FB. Against TOS here.
    Fly high and free, Jhessye ~

    My posts are meant to help think through possibilities and are strictly an additional opinion under circumstances when many points of view need to be considered. I apologize in advance to anyone whose potential involvement is contemplated in error. Please understand that much of what is happening is merely brainstorming during unfortunate events.


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  15. #83
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    I worked with troubled kids for many years. I don't think it's unusual that none of BS's family went to SF to get her. This is a very delicate situation...probably more delicate than any of us want to think about (and I'm not implying that BS is/was in any way complicit). The chances are high that she was sexually assaulted by JE. Her father adores her but he's also a cop...the investigators didn't need for him to ask or answer questions regarding what all had happened but you know that under the circumstances, no relative, including/especially her dad, could make idle conversation with her for all the hours it will take to get her home. I feel sure that she's spoken with her father and with other relatives and that they have been instructed as to what can and can't be discussed with her during their chats. Even when she gets back to VA there will be at least a short time when she's not with family...when she's in a protected custody situation...so that until law enforcement get what they need from her, no one else clouds her memory or interferes with what she knows or doesn't know. This little girl has been through an amazing trauma and only she and/or JE knows the answers to lots of questions. The investigators just won't run the risk of someone, well-meaning though they may be, interfering with the investigation of all the possible crimes committed over the last several days.

    BS will certainly be given contact with her father and other relatives. She'll be given medical treatment if she needs it. She'll talk with a psychologist or psychiatrist for lots of reasons, chief among them to assess her risk for suicide. They also need to try to ascertain whether she's still in the mental clutches of JE and, if she is, start the process of breaking that bond. That's a delicate process too.

    I don't think this child is being mistreated by VA authorities...she's being treated as what she is...a child who who has been abducted and whose mother has been murdered. That's quite a balancing act for everyone involved, including Brittany. But she is a key witness here and also a victim...she must be protected as both and that's a tricky situation. I feel sure, though, that investigators will work quickly to de-brief Brittany and make sure that she's secure with family ASAP. Not only is she a child, her father is part of the "blue line". She will be treated as fairly and as well as possible, I'm convinced. (Just MHO, of course )



  16. #84
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    In response to several post questioning last seen/shopping with mother Friday:


    http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2010/...dy;cbsCarousel
    "As far as we know, you know, the mother and daughter were doing some shopping or some errands together on Friday morning," he said.


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  18. #85
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    Quote Originally Posted by belimom View Post
    Just a reminder: do not quote from her MS or FB. Against TOS here.


    Oops!! Sorry!!!!




    ETA: Quote deleted


  19. #86
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    Based on the TS and BS's comments on FB and MS, I think that Thursday, Dec 2, was the day JE was told to leave. TS was trying to be positive, while BS wasn't very happy (summarizing). Maybe they took some time to do some mother/daughter stuff on Friday after whatever went down Thursday evening. Came home and had run-in with JE... and it went downhill from there. Again, Brittany is still a child and a victim through all of this... just like Jean Marie Berlinghoff - and Jean is 15, not 12.
    Fly high and free, Jhessye ~

    My posts are meant to help think through possibilities and are strictly an additional opinion under circumstances when many points of view need to be considered. I apologize in advance to anyone whose potential involvement is contemplated in error. Please understand that much of what is happening is merely brainstorming during unfortunate events.


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  21. #87
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    Quote Originally Posted by sam24 View Post
    Here's what erks me the most. Brittany's fb and myspace messages were 'screaming out for help'. She even changed her name to his and pictures with him and ily and hcb to him. UH, why did it take something like this for the relatives to say 'what a second, why is she posting this stuff?' Why did not one of her friends say 'uh, Brittany, this is not right, this guy is not right.' It would be one thing if this had been totally secret however, that doesn't seem to be the case. Did no one in her family not see the fb posts about him. She was screaming out for help, someone, anyone, she was looking for some guidance, from anyone. That's the sad part. Just my opinion but I place all the blame on those left that did nothing until it was way too late. I'm not going to say much about Tina, she's paid the ultimate price and her state of mind is unknown to me however every one of her friends that has been interviewed has talked about how sweet and nice she was to everyone. I want to believe that she had major blinders up and saw what was taking place as just innocent fun between her daughter and boyfriend, probably never imagining that he would take it to the level he did.
    Maybe she was eager to have a father figure and hence the last name change, pictures with him..etc. In any case, imo, it's very easy to judge a situation on the outside.. "they should have done this" "this could have been prevented by" but sometimes you just don't know if you should act on a feeling about something. It's quite possible they did. We don't know all the details. For me personally, in this situation, I can only blame evil in mans' heart.
    John 3:16


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  23. #88
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    Quote Originally Posted by sam24 View Post
    Leaving out of Salem, I'd say they took I-40. Takes you straight through TN, AK, OK, TX, NM, then CA, almost a straight shot to SF. They would have been able to stay on that road all the way across. That weekend had lots of snow further north (I-70) too.
    Yeah. I've been on a road trip from Riverside - CA to Salem - VA ( when I moved here ) and it's easier staying South. I'm pretty sure if they took the North approach, they would have ran into bad weather, especially going through Salt Lake City - UT. I have a friend from there and she's been complaining about the snow for over a month now. Not to mention, it's a lot colder.


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  25. #89
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  27. #90
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    Quote Originally Posted by shorty42404 View Post
    Maybe she was eager to have a father figure and hence the last name change, pictures with him..etc. In any case, imo, it's very easy to judge a situation on the outside.. "they should have done this" "this could have been prevented by" but sometimes you just don't know if you should act on a feeling about something. It's quite possible they did. We don't know all the details. For me personally, in this situation, I can only blame evil in mans' heart.
    I totally agree and I shouldn't have worded it the way I did, I felt real bad after posting it, maybe the family did do more than we know of. I hope that was the case. I do believe she was in need of a father or male figure for guidance in her life. My parents divorced when I was 12 and I did not see my dad again until I was in my twenties. I felt totally lost for a long time. My mother was one of those started putting the men she dated ahead of her concern for her own children. You can bet your last dollar that my child (13) does not worry like I did. 12 is an extremely tough age when things aren't going right. Again, I'm sorry I wrote that, I don't really blame anyone other than JE, just very frustrated with the whole situation.


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