Scottish Court deals with Bizarre Fetishes

SCOTTISH courts are dealing with an ever growing collection of fetishists.

In September 2003, pervert Ian Curtis was caught having sex with a frozen chicken.

When he was discovered by his wife Jean, the former military policeman, 42, of Glasgow, was dressed in a skirt, silk blouse and rubber stockings.

Jean, who later divorced him, shouted at her hubby: :laugh: 'You dirty b ****** , that's my Sunday lunch.'

In the same year, farmer Darran Emms, 35, was caught having sex with the family's Rhodesian Ridgeback dog by his pregnant wife Suzanne.

In 2002, Ross Watt appeared in court charged with having sex with a traffic cone and a shoe.

The 33-year-old, of Edinburgh, who was being watched by a crowd, was remanded in custody pending a psychiatric report.

In February 2003, officers arrested oddball Michael Bramham, who duped an Edinburgh woman into letting him cover her feet with baked beans.

In 1993, Karl Watkins was jailed for 18 months for trying to have sex with pavements. :waitasec:



http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/t...line=bizarre-fetishes-on-rise--name_page.html

How exactly does one go about having sex with a traffic cone and a shoe?

Jeana?

:laugh:

Mabel said:

Jeana?

Click to expand...

Mabel said:

How exactly does one go about having sex with a traffic cone and a shoe?

Jeana?

Click to expand...

Mabel: Till Jeana answers, I must pop in here :angel:

But don't make me.

I really have seen it done. (YEA).

Ok directions.

MAD DOG 20/20
Streets of any city, I perfer to see it done in a city such as: Tampa, LA, Miami, or NY

They seem to be those cities that have those kind of people who indulge in these sorts of behaviors on a regular basis. The country folk seem to do the animals. The city dwellers, (inner) like your equipment, easy to get at, Your following me here, right.

So you sauce yourself up with some MAD DOG 20/20
--you must be a male, tie one on...start a howling real loud to gather a crowd.
--usually there will be some electricial equipment laying by.
blackouts, always something needing to be fixied in cities.

maybe you have dropped some drugs to add to your buzz

you are so wigged out.
you do not have a woman, you start to imagine the cone,
she is looking hot.
it's sweaty out, you dig the color orange.
she appeals to your senses....
you feel your body heat rise
you want to make your move

she is rather attractive you are thinking?:HappyBday

Oh my GOD, it's party time

Your howling
You see her shoes, but it is blurry.
You turn her upside down.
(well you think it's a her, but it's a f.(freakin' cone and a homeless person's shoe)
you balance the cone as you fall on the shoe, trying to navigate yourself as to get the right angle....

and you yell..

"BABY, BIG DADDY IS COMING"

I think the rest of the picture is clear.

I don't mean to explain this, but I have seen the cone like behaviors from the boys in the city when it gets to hot and loving is scare.

Thank you.

have a great day.

:liar: Cause hey, it's party time.
Sidenote: Never dress in Orange in a hot city. You may be mistaken for a f. (freakin')Cone.

Pardon my French all.
G

I've seen how some of those cones behave. They're tramps.

Mabel said:

How exactly does one go about having sex with a traffic cone and a shoe?

Jeana?

Click to expand...

MUST I TEACH YA'LL EVERYTHING????? geez!

Casshew said:

When he was discovered by his wife Jean, the former military policeman, 42, of Glasgow, was dressed in a skirt, silk blouse and rubber stockings.

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Where might one get "rubber stockings"????

LOL Jeana

I dare ya to Google rubber stockings!!!

Why is it some men seem to feel the need to stick it to each and every hole they can find?

Gozgals said:

Sidenote: Never dress in Orange in a hot city. You may be mistaken for a f. (freakin')Cone.

Click to expand...

I will never wear orange again...

tybee204 said:

LOL Jeana

I dare ya to Google rubber stockings!!!

Click to expand...

No way Jose!!! LOL :chicken: :chicken: :chicken: :blushing: :blushing: