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  1. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gardenista View Post
    After reading this thread, I'm not so sure I don't agree with what the boys did. I'm about to throw up.
    I apologize. I didn't mean to make you feel sick. But really, if this is true (and I think it likely is) it is truly horrifying.

  2. #32
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    Re-reading one of the books on the case, I came across something that is very telling. Kitty Menendez was seeing a therapist, who noted that she was depressed over her marriage and Jose's philandering, but felt that there was something darker and more sinister below the surface. When he pressed her about it, Kitty would not reveal what else was going on, only that it was "sick and embarrassing". He called Jose in for a meeting; Jose did not treat Kitty like a wife that he loved but as someone he needed to run the household and to look after the boys, but he seemed unwilling to acknowledge that Kitty wanted his love and affection.

    Another thing that seems meaningful in retrospect is that Alicia Hercz, who taught Spanish at Princeton Day School and who was a casual friend of Kitty's, recalled that Lyle at about age 14, twice entered her office, sat down, and stared intently at her. She tried to engage him in conversation (she would ask him how he was or if he needed help with his homework, etc) but he would never respond. It almost seemed as if he was in a trance. After about forty-five minutes, he would get up and leave, again without saying a word. When Hercz told Kitty about these incidents, Lyle never came into her office again.

    On August 14, 1989, just days before the murders, Jose visited his mother Maria and told her that he was looking forward to retiring soon if he could pull off a $20 million deal and hoped that he could run for office. He made the telling comment that he wanted to be nearby while Erik was attending UCLA.

    The more I read about it, the more hints I see that indicate that there was indeed something dark and disturbing going on. I think it was gradually building until it exploded.
    Last edited by Noirdame79; 01-07-2017 at 09:39 PM.

  3. #33
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    It looked almost like Andre Agassi in the photo with Erik. Andre and Erik did some hitting together. When Andre was 14yo he moved to FL to play tennis away from his oppressive "tennis" father.

    In Andre's autobiographical book Open, he exposed:

    he hated tennis "with a dark and secret passion," thanks to the trauma he suffered under the regimen of his brutal father.

    Mike Agassi (who published his own autobiography) was just one among many notorious parents I knew while growing up in the Southern California junior tennis circuit. Another was Jose Menendez, the father of Lyle and Erik Menendez, who moved the family from Princeton, New Jersey, to the greater Los Angeles area when Erik, the younger sibling, was a teenager.
    https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog...have-in-common
    When the brothers were young, Jose demanded that they pick one sport in which to excel, and he recommended that it be an individual pursuit. By the time Lyle was twelve and Erik nine, they had selected tennis. Their parents devoted their time and money toward their sons' games. While Jose oversaw their progress, Kitty managed their daily schedules.
    I lived a life similar to these other tennis families when my DD played years of competitive tennis. It was high stress that she managed to handle with a cool head. She was going to play at Wimbledon or die trying was my X's attitude. He micromanaged her free time, her practice time, her hitting, her running, her diet, her life ... until she went to college in another state!
    She has a fantastic life. I'm the one with PTSD

  4. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeDee View Post
    It looked almost like Andre Agassi in the photo with Erik. Andre and Erik did some hitting together. When Andre was 14yo he moved to FL to play tennis away from his oppressive "tennis" father.

    In Andre's autobiographical book Open, he exposed:






    I lived a life similar to these other tennis families when my DD played years of competitive tennis. It was high stress that she managed to handle with a cool head. She was going to play at Wimbledon or die trying was my X's attitude. He micromanaged her free time, her practice time, her hitting, her running, her diet, her life ... until she went to college in another state!
    She has a fantastic life. I'm the one with PTSD
    Wow! Sorry you have to deal with that. Until I started reading up on this case, I had no idea how competitive tennis is as a sport, and how many parents (fathers especially it seems) not only pressure them to win, but who obsessively monitor their every move! Jose, being the narcissist that he was, probably would have dominated his sons' lives no matter what, but no doubt their involvement in tennis only increased that controlling and competitive edge.

    Speaking for myself, I was not athletic, nor was I competitive (but then again, my mother and stepfather didn't do much for me anyway, they just made me into something of a slave), but my brother played hockey and I hated how hard they pushed him to win all the time. I think it killed his enthusiasm for the sport. They always seemed to know what I was doing all the time, so even at school or with friends or relatives I was too afraid to say that they were physically and emotionally abusing me. Now they act like nothing happened at all, which is really annoying. Isn't it interesting how abusive parents justify their behavior at the time and then later conveniently "forget" that they hurt their kids!
    Last edited by Noirdame79; 01-10-2017 at 12:58 PM.

  5. #35
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    Lyle and Erik with their mother. I apologize for the poor quality



    With their father



    Lyle



    Erik, from a modelling session



    Erik posing on the motor scooter that his parents gave him as a graduation present


  6. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by Noirdame79 View Post
    Wow! Sorry you have to deal with that. Until I started reading up on this case, I had no idea how competitive tennis is as a sport, and how many parents (fathers especially it seems) not only pressure them to win, but who obsessively monitor their every move! Jose, being the narcissist that he was, probably would have dominated his sons' lives no matter what, but no doubt their involvement in tennis only increased that controlling and competitive edge.

    Speaking for myself, I was not athletic, nor was I competitive (but then again, my mother and stepfather didn't do much for me anyway, they just made me into something of a slave), but my brother played hockey and I hated how hard they pushed him to win all the time. I think it killed his enthusiasm for the sport. They always seemed to know what I was doing all the time, so even at school or with friends or relatives I was too afraid to say that they were physically and emotionally abusing me. Now they act like nothing happened at all, which is really annoying. Isn't it interesting how abusive parents justify their behavior at the time and then later conveniently "forget" that they hurt their kids!
    Thank you, Noirdame79. On the upside, I spent hours with my DD and with her participation in tournaments and Jr Davis and such, I was a happy tourist to many cities in our glorious country. The most difficult was hearing my DD being cussed out in Portuguese on the tennis court and not being able to save her from it!

    Your mother and step-father must hold regretful feelings of sorrow for hurting you. No one should become a slave to others. My condolences for any loss of happiness. May enjoyable memories abound!

    Today is Lyle's birthday. He is 49yo. His father died with a four million dollar estate. If Lyle had left Erik out of the crime, he probably could have gotten away with it. Erik had a concious that bothered him.

    Jose drilled holes into walls and such so he could watch Erik in his bedroom and bath! Who can live normally under such scrutiny? Moreover, Jose recorded Erik playing in tennis matches while in high school and would critique the film with Erik when the matches were over.

    Did the parents deserve to die in the heinous manner they did? Absolutely not! Kitty was standing and likely running and screaming. The bottom line is that if not for the continuous, horrific, demeaning, disgusting, sexual abuse then the double parenticide would have never happened. JMHO

    Thank you for posting the photos. I searched, via only Bing, for a video of Lyle or Erik playing tennis, to no avail.

    Erik has thrived in prison without fear of being assaulted each night while he slept. He told lawyer, LA, that his mistake was in not killing himself instead of killing his parents. Does anyone know the name of the Tennis Pro that Erik hired after his parent's death?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=spa8yMnItj8

  7. #37
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    Kitty and Jose Menendez murders happened in 1989. The brothers' first trial was in 1993.
    Coach Recounts Demands Made on Brothers : Trial: Tennis instructor testifies that Jose Menendez was the worst parent he had ever encountered.
    August 21, 1993|ALAN ABRAHAMSON | TIMES STAFF WRITER


    Lyle and Erik Menendez's first tennis coach testified Friday that he never saw love in the Menendez family.

    Charles P. Wadlington testified at their murder trial that their mother, Kitty Menendez, was always angry and sarcastic. Their father, Jose Menendez, was unrelentingly demanding and "the harshest person I'd ever met," Wadlington said.

    Jose Menendez ran the family "sort of like his business," said Wadlington, who was the brothers' tennis coach for five years and fought back tears as he testified. "He would give the orders and they would follow him."

    He added about his pupils: "I thought I was about all they had."

    Listening to Wadlington, a juror wiped tears from her eyes. Lyle Menendez, 25, slumped in his chair, and Erik Menendez, 22, took his glasses off and buried his face in his hands.
    http://articles.latimes.com/1993-08-..._jose-menendez

  8. #38
    Quote Originally Posted by DeDee View Post
    Does anyone know the name of the Tennis Pro that Erik hired after his parent's death?
    Mark Heffernan

  9. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Peppermintswirlz View Post
    Mark Heffernan
    I remember in one of the documentaries on the case, Heffernan stated that Erik was often very emotional, and that he would often find Erik in tears.

  10. #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeDee View Post
    Kitty and Jose Menendez murders happened in 1989. The brothers' first trial was in 1993.
    I was very moved by Wadlington's testimony. It obviously still upset him. How the prosecution could claim that they were outraged on behalf of "real victims" of abuse and overlook or mock so many eyewitnesses (including the brothers themselves) was extremely biased. In both trials, actually. David Conn was no better.
    Last edited by Noirdame79; 01-11-2017 at 12:50 PM.


  11. #41
    http://www.townandcountrymag.com/soc...on-interviews/

    Scroll down to view a preview of an HLN interview with Lyle Menendez scheduled to air Jan. 27

  12. #42
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    I believe the stories of abuse, I believe these boys grew up with a Monster.

  13. #43
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    Erik (testifying at the first trial): More than anything, I just wanted that when I died, that no one would find out that this was happening to me.

    So common among male victims of sexual abuse, especially. This is why so many of them don't come forward, along with fear that they won't be believed. There is also a reason why predators (incest agressors, and/or pedophiles) target boys specifically - because boys are less likely to tell, and less likely to be believed.

    Sad, horrible, but true.

  14. #44
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    Ditto !! ^^^^ post # 43

  15. #45
    If you scroll all the way down to Jan. 5, you can find another brief snippet of the HLN phone interview with Lyle:

    https://twitter.com/hlnpr?lang=en

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