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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Texas
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    1,231

    IL - Alex Pavlis, 6, beaten to death by new adoptive mom, 18 Dec 2003

    This poor child was adopted only a month ago, from Russia. His new Mom beat him to death while the father was at work. The family had also adopted a young girl, who is now with Child Protection Services.

    What the he**?

    http://www.cnn.com/2003/US/Midwest/1....ap/index.html

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    968

    Re: 6yr Old Adopted Last Month Beaten to Death by New Mom

    Originally posted by Juliana
    What the he**?
    Why do the newspapers keep reporting this stuff? They don't report each and every auto accident, they don't report each and every drop in the temperature. This is getting to be a real drag. Can't they find any decent news to report. We've heard all this stuff before, its not "news".

  3. #3
    ajt400Guest
    But this should be news everytime! A 6 month old child being beaten to death is news to me!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    1,103

    Re: 6yr Old Adopted Last Month Beaten to Death by New Mom

    [QUOTE]Originally posted by Juliana
    [B]This poor child was adopted only a month ago, from Russia. His new Mom beat him to death while the father was at work. The family had also adopted a young girl, who is now with Child Protection Services.

    What the he**?
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Juliana,

    What a horrendous story! How can anyone understand
    a couple who make 3 trips to Russia to adopt this
    6 year old boy? The Mother spends a year learning
    Russian and within one month she murders the kid?

    What excuse can we expect to come from some
    defense attorney on this one??????????

    I also have to ask "What the he**?"

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Oklahoma City
    Posts
    1,031
    well... for one... I can believe it.

    There was a background check done and if it was correctly done then there are no known violent incidents in this woman's past.

    I do not know, and may never figure out, WHY people go into the process of adoption SO naive. ESPECIALLY the adoption of older children. It is NOT like having your own child. You DON'T carry this child for nine months, love him before he is ever born, and bring home a helpless infant who is literally a blank slate that bonded with your voice from inside the womb months before.

    These children are abandoned, and often neglected by the orphanages where they end up living. Even when the care in the orphanage is loving and warm, can you imagine a small child, abandoned by the person with which they bonded, now forced to share any new affection with literally scores of "siblings"?

    These settings are where the seeds are sewn for serious pathology. And unwitting childless couples, desperate to have a child of their own, speaking a language the child doesn't even recognize, become the unsuspecting recipients of a nightmare that doesn't end. They think they will take home Bif and Buffy and everyone will fall right in step with the Ozzy and Harriet wholesome American family.

    The first two or three days they write off any problems to "adjustment". It's the most secure, yet overused "buzz word" they have. And progress usually IS made in bonding and blending these highly qualified, would-be adoptees of neglected (at the very least ) children, with their new charges. But true bonding rarely happens... despite all attempts. And instead of family harmony these heroic saviors of the American Dream end up living with an already well developed, highly functioning sociopath... age 6.

    The reality looks NOTHING like the fantasy looked. This total stranger they now call "son" may "adjust" by stomping on the head of the family cat while they count their blessings that they did not have an infant in the home they brought this child to. And after a awhile his refusal to bond with his new mother causes her to feel hopeless and rejected. And those feeling turn more and more toward anger with each day that shows no improvement in the "adjust" category. The mother resents the child further for disolving her dream of a happy home, and destroying the material things she holds dear. She lashes out and resorts to corporal punishment hoping this will break his mean spirited will... but the son only gets more combative as HIS violent reactions to HER violence also intensify.

    In the end both are hysterical with anger and resentment, but she is bigger. And what started as an unrealistic fantasy ends as an unimaginable tragedy. Not an evil woman... a woman driven to the edge and out of control. And not the sterotypical helpless child... a child tormented by an anti-social personality created years further back than he can even remember.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    2,064
    Sometimes, God doesn't give people the ability to bear children for a reason. This might be one of those times. How very sad this had to happen. :-(

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    Delaware
    Posts
    108
    Babcat, having been "adopted" into an American family 50 years ago, I can attest to the kind of "nonsense" the typical American family might believe about the adoption process. I much later found my birth mother when my son was five years old. The story the Catholic services responsible for handling the adoption told her was different from the story this same agency told my adoptive parents and again much different from the story they told me. Each self-serving deviance hurt all of us as individuals and was perpetuated by an American institution held, at that time, in deep regard. My very personal hatred of this institution was reconfirmed when it was subsequently held responsible for the inumerable crimes of molestation perpetrated by it's "holy representatives", the priests. These events completely destroyed my ability to have blind faith in any religious institution. Everyone involved in these situations was lied to, hurt, and abused by a system hellbent on maintaining it's "public image of integrity".
    Quote Originally Posted by Babcat
    well... for one... I can believe it.

    There was a background check done and if it was correctly done then there are no known violent incidents in this woman's past.

    I do not know, and may never figure out, WHY people go into the process of adoption SO naive. ESPECIALLY the adoption of older children. It is NOT like having your own child. You DON'T carry this child for nine months, love him before he is ever born, and bring home a helpless infant who is literally a blank slate that bonded with your voice from inside the womb months before.

    These children are abandoned, and often neglected by the orphanages where they end up living. Even when the care in the orphanage is loving and warm, can you imagine a small child, abandoned by the person with which they bonded, now forced to share any new affection with literally scores of "siblings"?

    These settings are where the seeds are sewn for serious pathology. And unwitting childless couples, desperate to have a child of their own, speaking a language the child doesn't even recognize, become the unsuspecting recipients of a nightmare that doesn't end. They think they will take home Bif and Buffy and everyone will fall right in step with the Ozzy and Harriet wholesome American family.

    The first two or three days they write off any problems to "adjustment". It's the most secure, yet overused "buzz word" they have. And progress usually IS made in bonding and blending these highly qualified, would-be adoptees of neglected (at the very least ) children, with their new charges. But true bonding rarely happens... despite all attempts. And instead of family harmony these heroic saviors of the American Dream end up living with an already well developed, highly functioning sociopath... age 6.

    The reality looks NOTHING like the fantasy looked. This total stranger they now call "son" may "adjust" by stomping on the head of the family cat while they count their blessings that they did not have an infant in the home they brought this child to. And after a awhile his refusal to bond with his new mother causes her to feel hopeless and rejected. And those feeling turn more and more toward anger with each day that shows no improvement in the "adjust" category. The mother resents the child further for disolving her dream of a happy home, and destroying the material things she holds dear. She lashes out and resorts to corporal punishment hoping this will break his mean spirited will... but the son only gets more combative as HIS violent reactions to HER violence also intensify.

    In the end both are hysterical with anger and resentment, but she is bigger. And what started as an unrealistic fantasy ends as an unimaginable tragedy. Not an evil woman... a woman driven to the edge and out of control. And not the sterotypical helpless child... a child tormented by an anti-social personality created years further back than he can even remember.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Posts
    19,887
    From May 2005:

    http://articles.chicagotribune.com/2...cohol-syndrome

    Saying Irma Pavlis cannot blame anyone but herself for the beating death of the 6-year-old boy she adopted from a Russian orphanage, a judge sentenced the Schaumburg woman Wednesday to 12 years in prison...

    He cited testimony, including evidence that Pavlis hit Alex with a computer cord and that she punched him in the abdomen and struck his head with her hand. "Alex spoke no English. The Pavlises spoke no Russian," Fecarotta said. "But the universal language is not violence. It's love."

    Last month, a jury convicted Pavlis of involuntary manslaughter for the child's 2003 death... With days earned for good behavior and time already spent in custody, Pavlis could be released in a little more than 3 years.



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