GUILTY NC - Joyce Hoskins, 47, shot to death, Wilmington, 4 Dec 2005

Joyce Hoskins told parole officers Nov. 9 that she no longer wanted Gradie Rhodes barred from contacting her despite having called Wilmington police a day earlier about a domestic disturbance involving him.

Less than a month later, the 47-year old Hoskins was fatally shot at her apartment at 1002 Grace St. That same morning, Sunday, Rhodes turned himself in to authorities and was charged with first-degree murder. He’s being held at the New Hanover County jail without the possibility of bail.

If Hoskins had proceeded with the domestic violence complaint, Rhodes might have been back in prison and Hoskins might still be alive, officials with the N.C. Division of Community Corrections said.

But domestic violence advocates say women often have been threatened by their abusers and are afraid of repercussions, which prevents them from continuing to pursue legal remedies.
http://www.wilmingtonstar.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20051207/NEWS/51206025/1004/FRONTPAGE

Honestly, I don't think it would have made a difference. Those that want to kill you will. No restraining order lately has been able to protect a victim. I know with dealing with police, although their intentions are good, there are limits to what they can do legally. So, you are left to your own resources. Just think Katrina victims. Bodies are still being found daily because there was some stupid order if the water was 5 ' don't go in. I can't swim. 5' would do it for me especially if I was incapacitated to some degree. Otherwise, I would have 5" and I surely would panic over that.

I think it could have made a difference - if the restraining order had kept up, maybe he wouldn't have been in that apartment - probably living with her. It's sad, but they'll often do that - go right back to their abuser, live with him, and he goes off again, and they're dead. That's why a lot of states have taken the decisions out of the abused person's hands.

Details said:

I think it could have made a difference - if the restraining order had kept up, maybe he wouldn't have been in that apartment - probably living with her. It's sad, but they'll often do that - go right back to their abuser, live with him, and he goes off again, and they're dead. That's why a lot of states have taken the decisions out of the abused person's hands.

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Details, this is only one case. Most with restraining orders don't allow them in. They violate it anyway. Yes, abusers have a way with reinventing themselves to their victims. I will grant you that. But on an even playing field the restraining orders don't work.

They don't work 100% - but nothing - other than maybe killing every domestic violence accused person - will work 100%. A restraining order does help, and it does work sometimes, even a lot of the time. It helps the police to be able to arrest the violent person while they are still in the intimidation phase, before they get around to murder.

Remember, we only hear about the ones where it didn't work.

Details said:

They don't work 100% - but nothing - other than maybe killing every domestic violence accused person - will work 100%. A restraining order does help, and it does work sometimes, even a lot of the time. It helps the police to be able to arrest the violent person while they are still in the intimidation phase, before they get around to murder.

Remember, we only hear about the ones where it didn't work.

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I would so like to believe this.And I will cede to you on this because I don't have statistics. But right now in my life I wouldn't rely on one. I trust no one. I stay anonymous. I stay on guard.

The thing is that even if the victim does not go back with the abuser, she is often in more danger than if she allowed a reconciliation.
An abuser often gets worse when the victim threatens to leave. If she calls LE and has him arrested, then he is even angrier. Now the legal system will usually issue a restraining order against the abuser. However, a restraining order does not really offer the victim any type of protection. If the abuser breaks the order, he goes to court, the judge says you can't do that, a fine and he is free to make another contact.
Domestic violence is an issue of control over another person. If she/he attempts to escape that person, they will often try harder to exert the control. An arrest followed by release just makes them madder. Added to their desire for control, you often get a desire for revenge.
A piece of paper saying don't make contact with the victim just doesn't provide much protection. Most abusers know that if they break the restraining order, then the punishment won't be much. Add to that the fact that if they can manage to exert control over the victim again, then she won't make a complaint. And if there is no complaint, there won't be a court case anyway.
Some states are exploring the possibility of putting GPS devices on domestic abusers for a while. At least when they do that, they know if the abuser attempts to go to the house and sneak up on the victim. IMO it is a step in the right direction.

Yep - but there are different level of abusers. Some won't be stopped; some will. Stopping some of them is a good first step. I also wouldn't trust one to protect me if I were in that situation - but I'd sure have one because it might work, and because it lets me call the police and have him hauled away anytime I so much as see him. Some of the abusers will kill in the end, but a lot of them aren't going that far, and for them, the restraining order prevents their harassment and intimidation attempts on their victim. A GPS would be good - ideally one that is on both the abuser and the victim, so anytime they are in range the police are notified.

The abuser does get worse when you try to leave, but there's no cure for that - other than staying with him, and that's the worst choice of all.

The only thing you can do is let LE know there is a problem. Give as many facts as you can and any written documents. After that you are on your own. I know, I live this daily.

Statistics have shown that the one act a DV victim can take that is most likely to result in their death is to call law enforcement. Protection orders can be helpful in accomplishing a lot for the victim (i.e., custody of the children) but everyone must remember that a protection order does stop a bullet. Sadly, sometimes it is safer for a victim to take the abuser back or return to the abuser. A victim once told me, when I asked her why she was going back to her husband, that at least at home, she knew where everything was...i.e., the furniture, appliances, etc. So she could maneuver around her surroundings, if he came after her.

Stuckinahs said:

Statistics have shown that the one act a DV victim can take that is most likely to result in their death is to call law enforcement. Protection orders can be helpful in accomplishing a lot for the victim (i.e., custody of the children) but everyone must remember that a protection order does stop a bullet. Sadly, sometimes it is safer for a victim to take the abuser back or return to the abuser. A victim once told me, when I asked her why she was going back to her husband, that at least at home, she knew where everything was...i.e., the furniture, appliances, etc. So she could maneuver around her surroundings, if he came after her.

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How sad. A friend of mine has a protective order against her ex in two states, where she lived before and now in SC. Guess who is coming to see her in SC? They've been together and apart for 17 years. I've given up on giving her help and advice. She's the one who told him where she lives now.

Are the odds really better than staying with the abuser long term? Because we see plenty of these women end up dead who stayed with the abuser too.

No the odds aren't any better. But that is the trap a victim gets into when deciding whether to stay or leave. Some think the answer is that if he abuses, you leave. But that is not always a good answer for all. Victims will often say, at least if I am living with him, I know where he is and have an idea of what he is thinking.

In this case the victim backed off her complaint and now she is dead.

In this case, the victim was following through on the complaint. Now she is dead.
http://websleuths.com/forums/showthread.php?t=33253

The domestic violence system is broken, and it needs repair.

From February 2010:

http://www.starnewsonline.com/article/20100208/ARTICLES/100209705

Gradie Lee Rhodes, a 58-year-old convicted murderer, was sentenced to life in prison without parole after pleading guilty to first-degree murder in the Dec. 4, 2005 shooting death of his wife and the mother of his two children...

This was the second murder conviction for Rhodes, who had previously been convicted in 1989 of killing the mother of another son... She was 21-year-old Avonna Terry, who was killed on June 9, 1988 in Wilson County.

Rhodes was released from prison after serving 16 years of a possible 50-year sentence.

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