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  1. #1
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    Spanking illegal?

    At least if your child is under 4 it may soon be a misdemeanor in California.

    http://www.sacbee.com/111/story/110337.html

    "Slapping, smacking, whacking or kicking also would be outlawed."
    Rest in peace little Marcus.

    Where is Jaycee Lee Dugard?

  2. #2
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    I thought abuse was already illegal?
    Happy New Years

  3. #3
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    Spare the rod, spoil the child comes to mind here.. hum... not sure what to think and I don't have kids... I just had to come here and give my opinion.. hehe


    This post is my opinion only, and is subject to making me look totally confused

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by teonspaleprincess
    I thought abuse was already illegal?
    There is a very fine line as to what is considered abuse and what is "corporal punishment." Spanking is not abuse unless it is "excessive" (ie: leaves marks, and other criteria). As for whaking, kicking and the likes, I assume they may fall under the same catergory currently (if it doesnt leave a mark, its not illegal). Corporal punishment is highly discouraged by child protective agencies but its not something that a parent can get in trouble for right now unless it is deemed "excessive" like I said before.
    Rest in peace little Marcus.

    Where is Jaycee Lee Dugard?

  5. #5
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    I have to admit that I give my kids a swat on the behind if I think they need it. I don't come anywhere close to leaving marks though, and never would.

  6. #6
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    I don't have kids, but if I had one like me, I would spank. I was an extremely strong-willed child. Spanking worked like nothing else--literally.

    When I was, oh, nine or so, my parents got the brilliant idea to ground me from reading--that was sheer TORTURE! They would have done it earlier (I was reading around 3), but they didn't want to stifle my learning. By the time I was nine, I was reading on a high school level, so they figured losing a week or two of reading privileges now and then wouldn't hurt my education--just my sanity!

    The spanking hurt more because it was embarassing than anything painful. Only once do I remember being spanked out of frustration. My mom grabbed the first thing she could to nail me--a flip flop! Boy, that really hurt (sarcasm)--it wasn't embarassing, just funny!

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by PaperDoll
    Spare the rod, spoil the child comes to mind here.. hum... not sure what to think and I don't have kids... I just had to come here and give my opinion.. hehe
    A good shepherd uses a rod to direct the sheep along the right path so that they remain safe. A good shepherd never hits the sheep with the rod.

    Likely, this statement from the old testament was not talking about physical punishment of children, but rather about being a trustworthy, observant shepherd and directing children's paths so that they remain safe.
    I do not intend to tiptoe through life only to arrive safely at death!

  8. #8
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    Time outs and taking away priviledges is from my experience MUCH more effective in "teaching a child" that their behavoir is not acceptable.

    Not spoiling the child, setting boudaries, following through with what you have said, natural consequences, are a life long learning basis for children. Holding them accountable and responsible for their actions, honesty, you know the things that will form a ethical human being.

    Not showing the child that "violence" is the answer, what lesson does that teach kids. That violence is acceptable, that Mom and Dad are bigger, stronger, in control, have power over them and can "physically" hurt them.

    About leaving marks, too many parents abuse kids and use the excuse " I was just disipling him, and blame the child. Too many parents "lose control", too many parents uyse physical force.

    A "deeply" religious family "read the Bible literally, and "physically" harmed their kids, you know "the rod", buised the kids, left marks, CAS was involved, kids removed, and the parents "cried" relligious prosecution, they were raising their kids "accoding" to God. They were "hurt" that bad, but had to be taught a lesson. Kids were returned, but they were given parenting lessons, and "well supervised".

    So now I do not agree with any physical punishment for children under any circumstances. Violence is not the answer...........

  9. #9
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    [QUOTE=Pandora]I don't have kids, but if I had one like me, I would spank. I was an extremely strong-willed child. Spanking worked like nothing else--literally.



    The spanking hurt more because it was embarassing than anything painful. Only once do I remember being spanked out of frustration. My mom grabbed the first thing she could to nail me--a flip flop! Boy, that really hurt (sarcasm)--it wasn't embarassing, just funny![/QUOTE lol--that reminds me the last time when my mother spanked me when I was about 12--She used a yardstick on me so much the yardstick broke--but I deserved it--we were throwing snowballs at cars at night,despite her prior warnings not to--we figured she'd never find out but then the cops showed up lol---I don't see anything wrong with spanking as long as it is rarely done--anyway,I'd rather have a little physical abuse than a whole lot of verbal abuse, which can sometimes be even more damaging to one's psyche

  10. #10
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    [QUOTE=Peter Hamilton]
    Quote Originally Posted by Pandora
    I don't have kids, but if I had one like me, I would spank. I was an extremely strong-willed child. Spanking worked like nothing else--literally.



    The spanking hurt more because it was embarassing than anything painful. Only once do I remember being spanked out of frustration. My mom grabbed the first thing she could to nail me--a flip flop! Boy, that really hurt (sarcasm)--it wasn't embarassing, just funny![/QUOTE lol--that reminds me the last time when my mother spanked me when I was about 12--She used a yardstick on me so much the yardstick broke--but I deserved it--we were throwing snowballs at cars at night,despite her prior warnings not to--we figured she'd never find out but then the cops showed up lol---I don't see anything wrong with spanking as long as it is rarely done--anyway,I'd rather have a little physical abuse than a whole lot of verbal abuse, which can sometimes be even more damaging to one's psyche
    LOL. I had a mom like yours. I think a spanking or swat on the behind gets kids attention. It is not meant to hurt so much as to startle them. I didn't beleive in spanking my first kid. I remember he used to grab things off the coffee table when he was about 2 and I was told to slap his hands. I didn't until I realised it is better to slap their hands, not hard, than to have them grab a glass they might break and cut themselves. Or swat their butt when they ran out to the road rather than have them hit by a car. I don't think anyone condones child abuse. This law might confuse spanking and child abuse.


  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by southcitymom
    A good shepherd uses a rod to direct the sheep along the right path so that they remain safe. A good shepherd never hits the sheep with the rod.

    Likely, this statement from the old testament was not talking about physical punishment of children, but rather about being a trustworthy, observant shepherd and directing children's paths so that they remain safe.

    I agree that a shepard wouldn't hit his sheep or be used as a Biblical example but on the other hand God instructed the Israelites to stone their grown kids who were getting into trouble, such as becoming drunkards. I can't believe that kicking a child is still only a misdemeanor.

  12. #12
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    I truly believe that, if I wasn't spanked when I was a kid, I'd be in some sort of trouble all these years later and would not have the good life that I have now.

    I absolutely do NOT feel that I was abused by being spanked and, it is MY butt.
    One body/several personalities

  13. #13
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    IrishMist is offline You can't control the wind - but you can adjust your sails
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    I think this is one of those things that sound good on paper, but doesn't apply well to real life.

    When my girls were young, I tried that touchy-feely thing. Time-outs, talking to them to explain what they did, etc. I couldn't take them anywhere. A couple of well timed swats on the bottom, and what do ya know? A big change in behavior!

    This nanny state business is getting way out of hand, IMO.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by txsvicki
    I agree that a shepard wouldn't hit his sheep or be used as a Biblical example but on the other hand God instructed the Israelites to stone their grown kids who were getting into trouble, such as becoming drunkards. I can't believe that kicking a child is still only a misdemeanor.
    I personally am not opposed to a swat on the bottom, and I definitely don't follow a great deal of what the Bible says when it comes to child-rearing! I just think the "spare the rod, spoil the child" quote is often misconstrued to the detriment of children.
    I do not intend to tiptoe through life only to arrive safely at death!

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by californiacarrie
    At least if your child is under 4 it may soon be a misdemeanor in California.

    http://www.sacbee.com/111/story/110337.html

    "Slapping, smacking, whacking or kicking also would be outlawed."
    Until mine were about 6 years old, nothing got their attention other than a quick swat to their butts. At 1-4 I don't think they comprehended "time out" concept because it never worked for me. They knew they were messing up when I spanked them. Repeating "no", "stop" or "don't do that" was pretty much ignored by them. After the 1st warning, they got a butt smack if their behavior continued. They got the message. I rarely if at all had to spank after 6 years old. Then, time outs and taking away priveleges worked to discipline them.

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