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  1. #1
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    UK - Inside the mind of the paedophile - and the wife standing by him

    Many will find this article deeply disturbing. But as a paedophile ring is smashed, one man jailed for child porn offences gives a brutally honest insight into his warped desires... and his wife reveals why she's standing by him.

    Bill Henkel and his wife Sharon sit close together on a sofa in their bright, immaculate detached home in a quiet corner of eastern England.
    They are active members of their local church. They sing in old age homes and Henkel, 47, likes to help the elderly of the parish with D.I.Y. jobs.
    On the surface, there is nothing remarkable about the couple. The same could be said of their home.


    Observant visitors, however, might note the absence of any computers - a clue to the fact that this is no ordinary marriage.
    In June 2003, Henkel was caught downloading child pornography at work. He was prosecuted, sentenced to 15 months' imprisonment in March last year and released at the halfway point in October.
    In the wake of the smashing of Britain's largest internet paedophile ring, reported in yesterday's Mail, Bill's account of his desires and his battle to control them makes compelling reading. It offers a chilling insight into the mind of a paedophile.

    [More]

  2. #2
    IrishMist's Avatar
    IrishMist is offline You can't control the wind - but you can adjust your sails
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    That was interesting, Blaize, thanks for posting it.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by IrishMist View Post
    That was interesting, Blaize, thanks for posting it.
    Welcome IrishMist. It's a good article because it doesn't seek to sensationalize the content.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by blaize View Post
    Many will find this article deeply disturbing. But as a paedophile ring is smashed, one man jailed for child porn offences gives a brutally honest insight into his warped desires... and his wife reveals why she's standing by him.

    Bill Henkel and his wife Sharon sit close together on a sofa in their bright, immaculate detached home in a quiet corner of eastern England.
    They are active members of their local church. They sing in old age homes and Henkel, 47, likes to help the elderly of the parish with D.I.Y. jobs.
    On the surface, there is nothing remarkable about the couple. The same could be said of their home.


    Observant visitors, however, might note the absence of any computers - a clue to the fact that this is no ordinary marriage.
    In June 2003, Henkel was caught downloading child pornography at work. He was prosecuted, sentenced to 15 months' imprisonment in March last year and released at the halfway point in October.
    In the wake of the smashing of Britain's largest internet paedophile ring, reported in yesterday's Mail, Bill's account of his desires and his battle to control them makes compelling reading. It offers a chilling insight into the mind of a paedophile.

    [More]
    Why the absence of computers at their home is a clue to the fact they do not have an ordinary marriage, I know heaps of married people who do not have computers, and they are happily married. I dont understand. He had access to a computer at his workplace, and you dont necessarily need a computer to be a pedophile, you just have to be a slime balll.

  5. #5
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    Thanks so much, blaize - that was fascinating.
    I do not intend to tiptoe through life only to arrive safely at death!

  6. #6
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    An interesting read about a very scarey couple......Thankyou Blaize.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shazza View Post
    Why the absence of computers at their home is a clue to the fact they do not have an ordinary marriage, I know heaps of married people who do not have computers, and they are happily married. I dont understand. He had access to a computer at his workplace, and you dont necessarily need a computer to be a pedophile, you just have to be a slime balll.
    Ah I think that was a reference to his IT related background .

  8. #8
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    I thought it was interesting that his wife managed to delude herself that given the opportunity he'd never act on his fantasies.

    "Asked whether his despair was rooted in the fear that he might eventually try to act out the fantasies he was viewing online, he pauses.
    Sharon tries to answer for him: "I don't think that was ever likely. He'd been fighting these feelings for so long and he'd been open about his problems with me. I don't believe he could have hurt a child."
    Yet before she can continue, Henkel interrupts and with chilling honesty says: "Sharon, you're kidding yourself. Why do you think I tried to kill myself?
    "I did realise that the fantasies were getting stronger and I was becoming more and more obsessed. After a while, the material you're viewing doesn't give you the same buzz and you look for more extreme versions.
    "Eventually, the most hardcore images you could find wouldn't do it for you. I recognised that my fantasies were going in a direction I didn't like and that I might not be able to control myself.
    "So, yes, I think there was a danger that I might have tried to get access to a child, and I really didn't want to go there." [Link]




    Thank god he was caught but also that he came to the personal realisation from finding those images of himself and his brother on the web, that children are not objects to be used to satisfy one's sexual desires.

  9. #9
    OneLostGrl's Avatar
    OneLostGrl is offline I'm going against the grain- I'm going sane
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    wow. very interesting article! thanks so much for sharing!

  10. #10
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    That was a very interesting article, Blaize. Thanks.


  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by OneLostGrl View Post
    wow. very interesting article! thanks so much for sharing!

    I totally agree. Thanks much.

  12. #12
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    She claims to be "sickened and disgusted" by what he did...thats total bs, if she was she's have left his sick a**, imo. Even he himself tells her she is kidding herself when she says she doesn't think he could ever hurt a child.
    I commend him for trying to get help but it's just like dr.'s told him...they can't cure him. He WILL do this again and he at some point in time will probably actually molest some poor child.

  13. #13
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    Welcome everyone.

    The thing is the wife was making a distinction between the actual physical rape of a child and the online depiction of the act. The mental gymnastics involved in that nice little delusion leads me to believe that if he had acted further on his desires she would have found some way of rationalizing that too.

    I have to commend Henkel though on his clear eyed understanding of his own behaviour & his ongoing attempts to manage his condition & impulses. I think his identification with other victims of child sex abuse, (he & his brother were both sexually abused as children), may be the one thing that if worked on with his councillors will keep him from offending.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by blaize View Post
    Welcome everyone.

    The thing is the wife was making a distinction between the actual physical rape of a child and the online depiction of the act. The mental gymnastics involved in that nice little delusion leads me to believe that if he had acted further on his desires she would have found some way of rationalizing that too.

    I have to commend Henkel though on his clear eyed understanding of his own behaviour & his ongoing attempts to manage his condition & impulses. I think his identification with other victims of child sex abuse, (he & his brother were both sexually abused as children), may be the one thing that if worked on with his councillors will keep him from offending.
    Yes - the wife has made a decision to stand by him through this and part of that decision has to involve some rationalization IMHO. I don't fault her for it - she obviously loves this man and feels like he is a good man in other ways. I am a cheerleader for those who choose to extend themselves in love to people that much of society believes to be monsters.

    The same rationalization this couple shares appears in my own marriage. My husband and I are both recovering drug addicts - the odds are very high that neither of us will stay clean and yet both of us hope, pray, believe that we can! My husband believes this in the face of one massive relapse I had after a number of years clean.

    Sexual addiction (and this man is both a pedophile and a porn addict, IMO) and drug addiction have similar components - mainly the obsessive/compulsive nature of getting your fix. When the man in this story described calling his wife and lying about a problem at work so that he could go back and look at porn online in secret, he describes behavior I have engaged in many times so that I could go do drugs in secret.

    I much appreciated the husband and wife's public honesty. I was fascinated by the incident in which he found pictures of himself online and had a moment of clarity that what he was doing was not at all harmless. I was also interested to read how he developed his attraction to children.

    I think most pedophiles offend and reoffend because pedophelia is a sexual orientation and it is so difficult to NOT act out on your own sexuality. I feel compassion for them - I can't imagine a life where acting out on my sexual desires would always harm someone else and be a crime.

    The man in this story seems to have a grip on how the odds are stacked against him and other pedophiles - he recommends almost lifelong monitoring of some sort or another.

    Articles like this are so important - the more we know about pedophiles, the better able we will be to protect out children.
    I do not intend to tiptoe through life only to arrive safely at death!

  15. #15
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    Very interesting article, pardon my delay in posting a reply, I was busy vomiting.
    "I was sickened when I learned what he had been doing. I could have walked away then and left him to it, but within hours of him being found out, I could see his remorse was genuine.
    I think this line is what bothers me the most. I have seen a paedophile look VERY remorseful, but it didn't take long to realize his remorse was in being caught, not in what he did. Maybe I'm wrong with this guy, but I think he would be the rare exception.
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