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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
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    3,135

    Open Letter to the Maddie Forum

    Dear friends,

    I have to say that I am feeling a bit "defeated" this evening, I read through the Not Guilty/Fence Sitters thread and now feel rather blue...

    I know I come across as being hard on the McCanns and I wish I could just remain neutral. I have tried very hard, believe me. I am a huge believer in "innocent until proven guilty" and I hate to rush to judgement. I have been reading and posting and trying to digest and trying to find a middle ground. I have prayed so hard and begged God to let the truth come out. I just keep coming back to how it feels like the McCanns have been lying to me, in so many ways, and to the whole world too.

    The only thing that has mattered to me from the start is this little girl. I do not care if her parents feel like they are been persecuted. I just want to know what happened to her. When I thought she had been abducted by a pedophile, my heart broke into a million pieces. I could not stand to think about it. I have two very young children and I found myself pulling them close, even to the point of suffocation. I could not even consider letting them play in front of the house because my fear was so great. As I searched the internet for information I was confronted with unspeakable horrors.

    As the tide began to shift, my anxiety lessened. I actually felt relief that her parents might be responsible for her vanishing. Perhaps my shift toward the guilt of her parents was because I desperately wanted to believe that this world was a safe place for my children. It was actually easier for me to believe that Maddie was dead than to consider the alternative. Do you know how hard that is, to feel that way??

    I am not a sleuth by nature. I never posted on this board or any like it, before this case. I am a tech, a computer nerd, an internet junkie. I am a logical thinker and I trust my gut. It has yet to fail me. I am a late in life mom who cherishes her children deeply. I cannot imagine life without them. I want to protect children and innocence. To that end I am driven. So I found myself here....

    I want very much for you to know that I am a good person with a really big heart. I do not wish harm to come to the McCanns. I want the truth to come out, in full, with no doubts. Proof, facts, solid evidence...I desperately want that too. Anything less would be hard for me to bear. Please forgive my attempts at humor at their expense. I mean no harm. I only want one thing....the TRUTH.

    I just want you to know that I do not consider myself to be part of a "lynch mob". I hope that you will read my contributions and not judge me to harshly. Maybe knowing where I am coming from will shed some light on how, and why, I am contributing.

    I appreciate all of you, every thought, every argument, every reason is valid to me.

    Thanks for listening (and reading).

    Heather

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
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    3,537
    Heres a cyber-hug and

    Heather, I feel bad you have taken on the burden of being called a heavy.
    I never once got the impression that if the tide turned yet again and the guilty proved to be other than the McCanns you would deny them that truth.

    Your looking for the killer or abductor of a child. If that causes others to feel uncomfortable because the parents have come under suspicion remember, it wasn't you who put them there. They have done this to themselves.

    I am greatful for all your hard work and pray with you for an end and closure so Madeleine can rest in peace.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Posts
    7,118
    Quote Originally Posted by Rino View Post
    Heres a cyber-hug and

    Heather, I feel bad you have taken on the burden of being called a heavy.
    I never once got the impression that if the tide turned yet again and the guilty proved to be other than the McCanns you would deny them that truth.

    Your looking for the killer or abductor of a child. If that causes others to feel uncomfortable because the parents have come under suspision remember, it wasn't you who put them there. They have done this to themselves.

    I am greatful for all your hard work and pray with you for an end and closure so Madelein can rest in peace.
    I second what Rino just said. There is no need for you to feel like a bad guy, Heather.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    7,766
    You don't sound like a bad person at all. You've been more than civil when posters have a different opinion about the case than you do. psst I'll tell you what you need to do...........take a break from your computer and this case for a few minutes, a few hours, a few days, whatever you need. I guarantee you will feel better when you return.

    Take it from someone who knows, you can spend too much time on the computer when following a case that hits close to your heart. Don't make this case your life....make it part of your life. (((hugs))) to you!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    26,902
    Heather darlin, I feel exactly the same way you do if that helps you any.

    Unfortunately, those of us who've been at Websleuths for more years than we can remember and have followed virtually every missing child case during that time seem to have a "sense" about what doesn't sound right. This case has never sounded right from day one. We don't have a crystal ball, but we've seen enough and heard enough to know when we're being fed what we consider to be b.s.

    And, from what I could see, you're far from being the only "heavy" here. Many of us think the family's story is crap and we don't mind saying so.

    Hang in there!!!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Posts
    14,796
    I wish every child and every adult who goes missing would have an advocate like you, Colomom. This would lessen the hardship for the many families who suffer, sometimes years, for a resolve in a case. Keeping it in the forefront will ultimately bring answers and justice for the person harmed. My hat is off to you for doing just that. An American Hero, we can't have too many.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    628
    Rest assured, Colomom, that I don't think that you have a lynch-mob approach. The scenario's that are the basis of our wild theories, are simply the unpleasant, but necessary considerations that an investigative team must evaluate. It seems that you report your findings, and let the chips fall where they may.

    I too, consider the case of the Van Dam parents, (Westerfield vs. Supreme Court of the County of San Diego), and how many people were convinced that one of them killed their daughter. Holy crap...if it weren't for considering the big picture (e.g. the Van Dam's activities that night), investigators might never have known that Westerfield was at the bar with the Van Dam's, until he simply disappeared. If I remember correctly, the Van Dams, and every person with whom they came in contact that night, was fair game for having committed the murder.

    If it is not one of the McCanns, I feel confident that the full vetting of the information/evidence that is causing the PJ to focus on them - will indeed yield the identity of the individual who directly caused Maddie's demise.

    You're the best, Colomom!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Hoffman Estates, IL
    Posts
    397
    Heather, I'm so sorry you feel that you need to defend yourself for feelings many (if not most) of us have here on this board. We all want the same thing--justice for Maddie, nothing less and nothing more.

    None of us knows the truth, we are simply weighing the information that we have so far and trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together. Many of us have done this on other forums as well. I started here with the Scott Peterson case, and even now he has defenders not willing to admit that he is guilty of double murder. Are the rest of us witch-hunters? We weighed the evidence presented at each stage (sometimes it changed hourly) and made our decisions based on this. At one point, too, I was praying that he didn't have anything to do with it, because if he did, she was surely dead. I wanted some evidence to turn up to exonerate him. Is it my fault that none did? Was I guilty of a witch hunt? No, absolutely not. And neither are you in this case.

    You have been wonderful, posting a wealth of information as you find it. At no point have I ever thought that you or anyone else on this board "has it in" for the McCanns.

    I hope you don't get fed up and leave--your information and insight is very valuable, to me anyway.

    Take care and God bless.

    Betsy
    He's guilty. Get over it.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    3,769
    Colomom,

    We have a right to our opinions. Be as it may, be harsh at times. On that thread they are calling this a witch hunt, how interesting??

    Our opinions are based on facts, gut feelings, appearances of the McCanns, but most of all we are all concerned parents wanting to fiind justice for Maddy!

    If I hurt someone's feelings in the process so be it. I have a vioce and I am gonna use it, girl!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    29,161
    Quote Originally Posted by Rino View Post
    Heres a cyber-hug and

    Heather, I feel bad you have taken on the burden of being called a heavy.
    I never once got the impression that if the tide turned yet again and the guilty proved to be other than the McCanns you would deny them that truth.

    Your looking for the killer or abductor of a child. If that causes others to feel uncomfortable because the parents have come under suspicion remember, it wasn't you who put them there. They have done this to themselves.

    I am greatful for all your hard work and pray with you for an end and closure so Madeleine can rest in peace.
    And after englishleigh, I will 3rd it! You have based your point of view on all the information that has been gathered over the last 4 months. Many others in this forum are still catching up. And I agree, if the tide turns the other way, you (as will many of us) will breathe a sigh of relief and allow the McCanns their innocence. And I have not forgotten that I will be supplying the crow for the crow pie you, Shazza and I (and maybe it was Cali?) will be eating.

    Salem


  11. #11
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Posts
    1,148
    Aww Heather, I am comparitively new to this forum but in no way would I think you were part of any lynch mob & it is obvious that you like many of us have the best interests of poor litle Madeleine at heart. I too am a mother who cherishes her children deeply & above all else!
    Your contributions here have been informative & unbiased. So many people all over the world questioned the inconsistencies in this case from the beginning including myself.
    At the end of the day there is not one person who would not want to see Madeleine home & safe & all these nightmare stories go away. Noone wants her dead, noone wants her parents guilty of an unspeakable crime.
    A forum like this will always explore the ins & outs of a case & unfortunately there has been much conflicting evidence in this case. We live in the world of freedom of speech & people are entitled to voice their opinions. That is the essence of a good forum people can speak their minds while having respect for everyone elses point of view.

    {{{ Hugs to you}}} Please don't worry it is so easy to get hurt by internet, take a rest & God will send a solution to this case soon I pray.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Posts
    731
    Quote Originally Posted by concernedperson View Post
    I wish every child and every adult who goes missing would have an advocate like you, Colomom. This would lessen the hardship for the many families who suffer, sometimes years, for a resolve in a case. Keeping it in the forefront will ultimately bring answers and justice for the person harmed. My hat is off to you for doing just that. An American Hero, we can't have too many.
    I have been a reader and not a poster until this evening when I first posted on the fence sitter thread. But, I have found your posts to be very interesting and not at all offensive and you are exactly the reason I LOVE WS. People here have intelligent discussions and the varied opinions allow me to really think about all the angles of different cases.

    You are a GEM and a very articulate one at that. Do not apologize for that. Keep up the posting, I for one value hearing all views.

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Posts
    13,720

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Anchorage, AK
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    1,418
    Heather, I think you are awesome.

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Northwest, Georgia
    Posts
    190
    Heather, I don't think you are someone with a lynch-mom mentality. I think you are a genuine person, and you certainly summed it all up in your letter here. I appreciate that.

    Yes, I am still on the fence .... but to think you have offended me is absurb. I am not sure that you have offended anyone here for that matter. Perhaps I am missing something ?

    I think you are an awesome person with a big heart, and I am certainly happy to have crossed paths with you. I admire your diligence and all that you have taken the time to present here. Again, we may not all agree, but I don't take offense to that.

    I have this gut feeling that I will be eating crow as well by sitting on the fence ..... but only time will tell.

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