Second-Grader Commits Suicide in New Jersey

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iNTERESTEDWOMAN

iNTERESTEDWOMAN

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My heart is breaking for this little guy. I have a 3rd grader, and if he took his life, I think I would have to take my own...




http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,305463,00.html

Police said several family members were at home when he died.
They found his body after he didn't answer a call to dinner.
Grief counselors were at the boy's school.
 
omgoodness...that is the absolute saddest thing ever :( i dont even know what to think!!
 
Oh my gosh, how awful! I have a son in 2nd grade and I can't imagine what could be so awful that would make them resort to such a tragic act??

That poor little boy :(
 
I can't imagine someone so young having such deep sadness. I wonder if he had psychological issues or a bad home?? Either way, what a horrible story.
 
I can't imagine a 7 year old committing suicide.. I wonder if he was playing around and "accidently" hung himself???
It's very sad either way.
 
If I were his teacher I'd be passing everyone the rest of my career! It's not her fault - but there's probably no telling her that for awhile.
 
in the gifted and talented program
maybe he couldn't take getting a bad mark. you build those kids up so much... just giving them one bad mark can be that devestating? OMG!
 
pedinurse said:
in the gifted and talented program
maybe he couldn't take getting a bad mark. you build those kids up so much... just giving them one bad mark can be that devestating? OMG!
Click to expand...

In fairness to parents, I think it can be difficult to encourage a child to succeed without giving him or her the idea that failure is the end of the world. Particularly with some kids.
 
OMG this is beyond horrible. I have a seven year old and can't imagine.
 
Nova said:
In fairness to parents, I think it can be difficult to encourage a child to succeed without giving him or her the idea that failure is the end of the world. Particularly with some kids.
Click to expand...

oh nova, i wasn't even thinking about the parents. i was more thinking about the school system.
 
What a tragedy for that family! He must have been a very intelligent little boy to have such an abstract solution for what he deemed to be so horrific. I cannot fathom a child of that age committing suicide.

It sounds as if there must have been warning signs this boy was troubled before this happened. A child doesn't wake up one morning and decide to "end it all".

While they have ruled out abuse or homicide in his case, they need to take a serious look at how driven his parents were about the boy's success and failures involving school/activities. The pressures being put on children today with AP classes are incredible. Maybe they need to put an equal amount of importance into teaching self-esteem and the arts. They have to maintain a balance in gifted students.
 
I think what hit me SO hard about this case is my own son. Ryan is 8 and in 3rd grade and very bright. Yesterday when he brought his report card home he had such a sad little look on his face. His words haunt me, even before I read this story. He said almost in tears, "Mommy, I didn't make straight A's, I got one N".

Not knowing what he ment by "N", I must have sounded shocked when I said..."WHAT???" He proceeded to take out his report card to show it to me. He actually did make all A's, but in the personal and social developement area that is marked with Proficiency Levels such as S=Satisfactory, N=Needs Improvement and U=Unsatisfactory, he received an N for "works well in groups". The teacher also wrote a note that he was working hard on being more patient with his peers, but sometimes gets frustrated when they don't understand concepts as fast as he does. I was all choked up when I gave him a big bear hug and told him just how wonderful he did do. He got 6 A's, 7 S's and one little tiny N. Unfortunately that N was Huge to him.

I can't wait for him to get home from school today so I can tell him how important he is to us, and that although good grades are great, we'll love him even if he flunks 3rd grade.
 
This is heartbreaking and leaves me almost speechless. My firstborn (also 7) is naturally hard on himself. He is a perfectionist and a people pleaser.

It is a balancing act to praise him for doing well in school without making him think that not doing well sometimes isn't the end of the world. We have always told both of our sons that we care that they give their best effort and have fun learning - we don't care about the end result (grades).

My prayers to this family. I cannot imagine such pain.
 
iNTERESTEDWOMAN said:
I think what hit me SO hard about this case is my own son. Ryan is 8 and in 3rd grade and very bright. Yesterday when he brought his report card home he had such a sad little look on his face. His words haunt me, even before I read this story. He said almost in tears, "Mommy, I didn't make straight A's, I got one N".

Not knowing what he ment by "N", I must have sounded shocked when I said..."WHAT???" He proceeded to take out his report card to show it to me. He actually did make all A's, but in the personal and social developement area that is marked with Proficiency Levels such as S=Satisfactory, N=Needs Improvement and U=Unsatisfactory, he received 1 N for "works well in groups". The teacher also wrote a note that he was working hard on being more patient with his peers, but sometimes gets frustrated when they don't understand concepts as fast as he does. I just about started crying when I gave him a big bear hug and told him just how wonderful he did do. He got 6 A's, 7 S's and one little tiny N. Unfortunatelly that N was Huge to him.

I can't wait for him to get home from school today so I can tell him how important he is to us, and that although good grades are great, we'll love him even if he flunks 3rd grade.
Click to expand...

Sounds like my 1st grader, IW. I hate "grade" pressure :rolleyes: - we don't put any on our sons, but they still get it from the school - you just can't change that, And it is human nature to compare yourself to others that way at that age.

It's not until you're an adult that you realize that some of the happiest, most successful people in the world weren't good students and schjool is about a lot more than report cards.
 
pedinurse said:
oh nova, i wasn't even thinking about the parents. i was more thinking about the school system.
Click to expand...

Sorry, pn. I didn't think you were blaming either. And, of course, some parents communicate unrealistic expectations to their kids. I was just acknowledging that there's a fine line between encouraging a kid to succeed and making a neurotic wreck of him.
 
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