Will you do this for Caylee?

We all know how precious our children are - all of them. In Caylee's memory I would like to ask everyone to do this simple task:

In your daily life, in public places, in parks, everywhere you go - watch out for the little ones. Take note of their approximate age and thus their abilities and inabilities. Watch their mood and demeanor. While you are in line at the store, while you sit on the bench at the park, while you walk into the school to pick up your own - PAY ATTENTION.

Notice their hair colors, eyes full of wonder and awe but most importantly, would you please notice their parents? Are the parents watching them? Are they distracted while the little one climbs on something dangerous? The best parents will notice that you are watching their child - just smile and nod your approval. The distracted parents might have a very good reason so don't get angry, just do what you can to protect the children. Notice the children, you never know when you might see one that needs noticing - needs your help. Just be honest and do this with love in your heart for Caylee and all of the children - no one will be mad at you for caring!

Do this in Caylee's name...please!

comments/thoughts?

Sadly you can watch, you can listen, you can even judge those around you. But that doesn't mean you can protect the child. I agree this is a great idea, however, as a mother of 3, I even at times seem frustrated in a store (well did when they were younger). Does that mean someone should report me for talking sternly to them in line? NO! I am known to be a great mother...so was Casey according to those closest to her. How can you know? <shrugs> Sadly, you just never know. Sometimes it's the ones who appear happy in plain sight who are in the most danger....as we've seen in this sad case

RIP Caylee.

cocoamom said:

We all know how precious our children are - all of them. In Caylee's memory I would like to ask everyone to do this simple task:

In your daily life, in public places, in parks, everywhere you go - watch out for the little ones. Take note of their approximate age and thus their abilities and inabilities. Watch their mood and demeanor. While you are in line at the store, while you sit on the bench at the park, while you walk into the school to pick up your own - PAY ATTENTION.

Notice their hair colors, eyes full of wonder and awe but most importantly, would you please notice their parents? Are the parents watching them? Are they distracted while the little one climbs on something dangerous? The best parents will notice that you are watching their child - just smile and nod your approval. The distracted parents might have a very good reason so don't get angry, just do what you can to protect the children. Notice the children, you never know when you might see one that needs noticing - needs your help. Just be honest and do this with love in your heart for Caylee and all of the children - no one will be mad at you for caring!

Do this in Caylee's name...please!

comments/thoughts?

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Yes, Cocoamom, I will and do do this, more so now than ever before. Caylee has changed how I see children. All children. Quiet ones, loud ones, shy ones, crying ones, good ones, misbehaving ones...they all get a smile from me (and Caylee).

No! I am not talking about reporting anyone! I mean just watch out for them. There are accidents and dangerous things that happen. There are really nasty people out there just waiting for a frustrated mom to be distracted by another child or something so they can snatch and run.

I'm just saying watch out for them and don't be afraid to help! You never know when just noticing or watching can prevent the death or injury of a child -

:blowkiss:

No problem here, I will do it for little Caylee!

I think this depends..... on exactly what is seen. A few weeks ago I took my son for a weekend to an indoor water park. Part of the park had a small circular area no bigger than 8X8 with a strong current making it difficult to exit that area. A young girl, probably 7-but small- saw me and asked me to help her get out. I did... and held her up above the water but at an arms length. Her brother got a little scared and immediately told me, I am supposed to stay with her. He might have been all of 9. I immediately reasurred him I was just going to move her to the edge of the pool.

I wasn't sure if I did the right thing, but my immediate concern and thought was if she was exhausted she needed to be able to hold herself on the edge to regain her energy.

I think sometimes we need to instruct our children not only to fear strangers, but to recognize situations that might be safe.. .ie, a parent who has been there with their child all day...and other adults are around. Kind of like a safety in numbers thing.

I don't know if anyone could have recognized ahead of time Casey would do this. jmo

me too!

Today my heart has been heavy-I watched my 5 year old daughter play and I wondered how KC could be so evil. Your children love unconditionally and have so much potential. It makes my heart ache.
We went to our zoo to see Christmas lights and I watched all the other children having fun, and I thought how unfair that Caylee will never see another Christmas tree, open another present or just laugh. KC took everything away from Caylee, and her grandparents that loved her.
I think we should all hug our own children a little longer. Never take a minute you have with them for granted. Realize how blessed you are that they are in your life. Do that in Caylee's honor.

I do this now. Here in the last week. I had a co-worker explain to me that she knew of a child who's dad busted his nose( he is only 3) because he dumped out Shampoo in the tub. She said she wanted to get custody of the child, what would I do. I explain to her I wouldnt wait on trying to get custody. My first stop would be DSS. To report this abuse ASAP. She went the very next morning and got a caseworker. Now the child has been removed, to a foster family. Until she can get some sort of Custody. It all boils down to do whatever to protect a child.

Cubby said:

I think this depends..... on exactly what is seen. A few weeks ago I took my son for a weekend to an indoor water park. Part of the park had a small circular area no bigger than 8X8 with a strong current making it difficult to exit that area. A young girl, probably 7-but small- saw me and asked me to help her get out. I did... and held her up above the water but at an arms length. Her brother got a little scared and immediately told me, I am supposed to stay with her. He might have been all of 9. I immediately reasurred him I was just going to move her to the edge of the pool.

I wasn't sure if I did the right thing, but my immediate concern and thought was if she was exhausted she needed to be able to hold herself on the edge to regain her energy.

I think sometimes we need to instruct our children not only to fear strangers, but to recognize situations that might be safe.. .ie, a parent who has been there with their child all day...and other adults are around. Kind of like a safety in numbers thing.

I don't know if anyone could have recognized ahead of time Casey would do this. jmo

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BLESS YOU CUBBY!! Although her brother was alarmed at you, you may very well have saved her life! See? by not being afraid to step up, you helped a child! Arms length, explaining to the brother, etc. You did exactly right!! It even sounds like the brother may have been grateful for your help and just maybe he wanted a little hand up too!

Thank you for watching out for children! :clap::clap:

cocoamom said:

We all know how precious our children are - all of them. In Caylee's memory I would like to ask everyone to do this simple task:

In your daily life, in public places, in parks, everywhere you go - watch out for the little ones. Take note of their approximate age and thus their abilities and inabilities. Watch their mood and demeanor. While you are in line at the store, while you sit on the bench at the park, while you walk into the school to pick up your own - PAY ATTENTION.

Notice their hair colors, eyes full of wonder and awe but most importantly, would you please notice their parents? Are the parents watching them? Are they distracted while the little one climbs on something dangerous? The best parents will notice that you are watching their child - just smile and nod your approval. The distracted parents might have a very good reason so don't get angry, just do what you can to protect the children. Notice the children, you never know when you might see one that needs noticing - needs your help. Just be honest and do this with love in your heart for Caylee and all of the children - no one will be mad at you for caring!

Do this in Caylee's name...please!

comments/thoughts?

Click to expand...

I've been in "situations" concerning children I wasn't related to twice. The first time a young couple was going through a super market oblivious of the fact that their young (about 3) daughter was going in and out of the automatic doors. Well, I stayed with the child until her parents finally realized she wasn't with them. Then I told them it wasn't safe to let her roam around alone. They weren't rude, but I don't believe they took too kindly to me either. Maybe they learned something, maybe they didn't.

The second time was disturbing and it disturbs me to this day. I was in NJ about 12 years ago, in a bar/restaurant type of place sitting at the bar with my ex hubby. A man walked in with two boys, one a teenager, the other about 8 or so. They sat at a small table where I could see them very clearly. They seemed to be very strained and the teenager was smoking - it was allowed then, but he was too young to smoke. The three of them sat there, ordered some food, but my hinky meter was going off big time. These three didn't really look alike and they just weren't comfortable. I told myself it was a father on his weekend visit with his kids, but I'm not sure that was true. I've always wondered if this was a guy like Parnell or the pizza guy who abducted Shawn Hornbeck and the other child. I minded my own business that night, but I've asked myself over and over if there was anything I could have done to find out if everything was on the up and up. Does anyone have any ideas how to handle a situation like this?

sure will cocomom= more so now than ever

Blackwatch said:

I've been in "situations" concerning children I wasn't related to twice. The first time a young couple was going through a super market oblivious of the fact that their young (about 3) daughter was going in and out of the automatic doors. Well, I stayed with the child until her parents finally realized she wasn't with them. Then I told them it wasn't safe to let her roam around alone. They weren't rude, but I don't believe they took too kindly to me either. Maybe they learned something, maybe they didn't.

The second time was disturbing and it disturbs me to this day. I was in NJ about 12 years ago, in a bar/restaurant type of place sitting at the bar with my ex hubby. A man walked in with two boys, one a teenager, the other about 8 or so. They sat at a small table where I could see them very clearly. They seemed to be very strained and the teenager was smoking - it was allowed then, but he was too young to smoke. The three of them sat there, ordered some food, but my hinky meter was going off big time. These three didn't really look alike and they just weren't comfortable. I told myself it was a father on his weekend visit with his kids, but I'm not sure that was true. I've always wondered if this was a guy like Parnell or the pizza guy who abducted Shawn Hornbeck and the other child. I minded my own business that night, but I've asked myself over and over if there was anything I could have done to find out if everything was on the up and up. Does anyone have any ideas how to handle a situation like this?

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You did great on the first one! Second one, there isn't a lot you could do. I guess I would have taken a deep breath and probably embarrassed my husband but I would have got up and gone to the rest room. On my way back I would have gone right up to one of the kids (probably the smoker to offset alarm and win one over) and asked "Hey! Are you the Johnson brothers?" (or some other such made up name). Before they can answer, I would have continued with a little blabber about how my son goes to school with a couple of boys who like to wear red hats ( or blue shoes or whatever stands out) and he says they are the Johnson brothers...while talking smile and act all nonchalant and cheerful to the "dad" or whomever else is there.

Just some idle chit chat like that completely catches people off guard because no one expects you to do that! Offer up a name like "my son's name is Charlie. Do you know Charlie?"...."so what IS your name anyways? Well Robert, you sure are handsome! I love your haircut (or long hair or black hair or bright blue eyes, or mysterious looking eyes - whatever is true and stands out that they would take as a compliment)..."

You might get a name, you might not. They may just look at you like you are from another planet, whatever. Just smile and shrug and go back to the table with a wink to them (and your embarrassed spouse)...if the "dad" acts strangely - and you WILL notice strange - like leaving right away or getting real stern with them, find a way to get out after them and get a tag number and description of the car....that's about all you can do.

Write it all down - ages, clothing, etc. You may hear that very day of a missing child, it might be months, if you see something, you can pull out your paper and call LE. You might never hear anything but at least you can sleep and not wonder every day -

This is just what I would have done. My number one rule is follow your instincts. If they are screaming that something isn't right - it probably isn't! What's the worst that will happen? They think you are some crazy lady from the restaurant? Oh well - who cares! I also would mention to my waitress how strange the whole situation seemed "don't you think so?" Involve someone else slightly just as another witness who noticed for later if needed...

I don't know, maybe I'm just nuts and paranoid - I don't care, the kids are worth it and I have never had any ill reaction to anything I did!

Blackwatch~
You should always trust your instincts. In this situation, you can always walk by and drop something (accidentally) and strike up a friendly conversation as you retrieve what you dropped. Cellphone photos help out too... as does getting a license plate number if you think something is off kilter. Jot down physical appearance of people in question, and what they were wearing..even if you write it on your hand or a napkin. And ask authorities about it if need be.

There is always a fine line when attempting to assess some situations. Its easy to get the wrong impression. Most authorities will be willing to check out the situation. I noticed something peculiar involving a little girl in a store last year, while I was at work. I was able to follow this woman discreetly and confirm my feeling. I reported what I saw to the management and it was dealt with legally from there. I believe its better to report something odd, than to let it go. People do need to be aware.(By the way, this girl was appx 20 months old and had red lashings across her back, which were visible when her mom was yanking her around by the arm and screaming at her.) It was very hard to resist grabbing HER mom by her hair!

Cocoamom-- excellent post for awareness!

cocoamom said:

No! I am not talking about reporting anyone! I mean just watch out for them. There are accidents and dangerous things that happen. There are really nasty people out there just waiting for a frustrated mom to be distracted by another child or something so they can snatch and run.

I'm just saying watch out for them and don't be afraid to help! You never know when just noticing or watching can prevent the death or injury of a child -

:blowkiss:

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Thinking back I've had a few of those moments ( life or death of a child ) where you just react........ instinct .

I lived in an aptment complex with a playground that parents would send their kids to play, without supervision . My apartment was right off the playground but I always supervised my kids , I would just sit on the betch watching all the kids play.There was an 18 month old baby left in the care of her 10 yr. old sister on the playground . It was spring ,there was a ditch filled with water near by . Older sister got busy playing forgetting about the baby , the baby started going for the ditch . I was way on the other side of the playground and saw what was happening so I ran like a crazy yelling NO . The baby reached the side of the ditch (small hill leading down ) the baby couldn't stop but rather picked up speed plunging into the water . I mean she was under water , I reached in and pulled her out . She was fine Thank God . I carried her back to her aptment to have not so nice words with the mother . Didn't even seem to faze her that the baby almost drown .

Four years later that same baby died in a tragic house fire , she was found behind the front door . The parents saved them selves leaving the kids in the house , that same older sister had 3rd degree burns trying to save her baby sister . So sad

As a mother of 6 it's just in my nature to keep my eyes open .

cocoamom said:

BLESS YOU CUBBY!! Although her brother was alarmed at you, you may very well have saved her life! See? by not being afraid to step up, you helped a child! Arms length, explaining to the brother, etc. You did exactly right!! It even sounds like the brother may have been grateful for your help and just maybe he wanted a little hand up too!

Thank you for watching out for children! :clap::clap:

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Thx cocoamom. While her brother was obviously frightened by the "stranger" carrying his sister away, she recognized me as a mom who had been playing with my son for several hours. I don't know if he said anything to his parents and I never saw them, though I saw him swimming for awhile. I hope the parents took this example not only to understand a 9 yr old who is capable of swimming isn't always going to be able to 'help' a 7 yr old. this was a really strong current that I had a hard time walking through carrying my son.

There was another time years ago when my son had just turned two and we were at the phx zoo with my dad. A group of moms and kids were at the picnic table when one 3 or so yr old walked off.... no one noticed.... walked right into the bathroom. I probably should have gotten up at the time but didn't, and kept an eye on the bathroom door and waited for one of the parents to notice her missing... when that happened I was able to let them know where she went.

Sad thing is most children are not harmed by strangers, but by those they love and are supposed to trust.

IrishSweetOne said:

Thinking back I've had a few of those moments ( life or death of a child ) where you just react........ instinct .

I lived in an aptment complex with a playground that parents would send their kids to play, without supervision . My apartment was right off the playground but I always supervised my kids , I would just sit on the betch watching all the kids play.There was an 18 month old baby left in the care of her 10 yr. old sister on the playground . It was spring ,there was a ditch filled with water near by . Older sister got busy playing forgetting about the baby , the baby started going for the ditch . I was way on the other side of the playground and saw what was happening so I ran like a crazy yelling NO . The baby reached the side of the ditch (small hill leading down ) the baby couldn't stop but rather picked up speed plunging into the water . I mean she was under water , I reached in and pulled her out . She was fine Thank God . I carried her back to her aptment to have not so nice words with the mother . Didn't even seem to faze her that the baby almost drown .

Four years later that same baby died in a tragic house fire , she was found behind the front door . The parents saved them selves leaving the kids in the house , that same older sister had 3rd degree burns trying to save her baby sister . So sad

As a mother of 6 it's just in my nature to keep my eyes open .

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Oh Irish! So sad! But you know what? That little baby had four years with us thanks to you! And her big sister will probably be the best mom on Earth now ~ I believe in there being a reason for everything that happens even if we don't understand it right away!

Cocoamom,
Thank you for your heartfelt post.
I understand each and every poster in this thread.
My own personal feelings are, its better to know that you are wrong, then never know you were right.
Maybe if someone would have seen the signs and stepped in, Caylee would be with us today.
It takes a community to raise a child, and along with a voice, we can keep them safe.:blowkiss:

IrishSweetOne said:

Thinking back I've had a few of those moments ( life or death of a child ) where you just react........ instinct .

I lived in an aptment complex with a playground that parents would send their kids to play, without supervision . My apartment was right off the playground but I always supervised my kids , I would just sit on the betch watching all the kids play.There was an 18 month old baby left in the care of her 10 yr. old sister on the playground . It was spring ,there was a ditch filled with water near by . Older sister got busy playing forgetting about the baby , the baby started going for the ditch . I was way on the other side of the playground and saw what was happening so I ran like a crazy yelling NO . The baby reached the side of the ditch (small hill leading down ) the baby couldn't stop but rather picked up speed plunging into the water . I mean she was under water , I reached in and pulled her out . She was fine Thank God . I carried her back to her aptment to have not so nice words with the mother . Didn't even seem to faze her that the baby almost drown .

Four years later that same baby died in a tragic house fire , she was found behind the front door . The parents saved them selves leaving the kids in the house , that same older sister had 3rd degree burns trying to save her baby sister . So sad

As a mother of 6 it's just in my nature to keep my eyes open .

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Bless your heart, how tragic for those children.

I had an incident too, with a small child yanking on a pole stuck in the grass to tie off a yard with new grass. I bent to eye level and was nice/calm in asking the child to stop. Apparently this scared the older 7 yr old sibling who was out watching this baby...and when mama came out she was screaming and cussing at me. Her sister actually had to hold her arm back when she went to punch me in the face. My godsons family heard the commotion and I asked them to call the police. Mama accused me of using racial epitaths... and LE threatened to arrest me. I had a bad taste in my mouth for a long long time after that....

Cubby said:

I think this depends..... on exactly what is seen. A few weeks ago I took my son for a weekend to an indoor water park. Part of the park had a small circular area no bigger than 8X8 with a strong current making it difficult to exit that area. A young girl, probably 7-but small- saw me and asked me to help her get out. I did... and held her up above the water but at an arms length. Her brother got a little scared and immediately told me, I am supposed to stay with her. He might have been all of 9. I immediately reasurred him I was just going to move her to the edge of the pool.

I wasn't sure if I did the right thing, but my immediate concern and thought was if she was exhausted she needed to be able to hold herself on the edge to regain her energy.

I think sometimes we need to instruct our children not only to fear strangers, but to recognize situations that might be safe.. .ie, a parent who has been there with their child all day...and other adults are around. Kind of like a safety in numbers thing.

I don't know if anyone could have recognized ahead of time Casey would do this. jmo

Click to expand...

You did Good Cubby !!