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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    NY
    Posts
    479

    Do you enjoy going to the bathroom? Charmin wants YOU! NO JOKE!

    Make $10,000 as a Charmin (yes, toilet paper) ambassador for 4 weeks in NYC

    http://www.charmin.com/en_US/enjoy-the-go/index.php

    Hurry~ interviews are this Thursday.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Louisiana
    Posts
    12,317
    Oh, Man!
    Thoughts and prayers for the people of Paris and all of France!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    sitting on a cornflake
    Posts
    2,371
    I hereby nominate Jose Baez. After all, he's already trying to sell us an enormous load of cr@p, why not sell the paper to go along with it?


    "I look to a day when people will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character."
    -Martin Luther King, Jr.



  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    In Pennsylvania, but wishing she was some place else.
    Posts
    530
    Sounds like a cool job to me.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Colorado
    Posts
    17,715
    I would be more than HAPPY to be a Charmin ambassador! I'll call them on the phone right now. Do they take cute little 61-year-old mother's and teachers?

    I've gone to the bathroom or "taken them to bathroom" in every possible nightmarish situation or "pleasant" situation possible. I've cleaned up every possible, indelicate mess with, yess CHARMIN!!! You betcha - Charmin is the softest but also the STRONGEST! It doesn't just evaporate so the goo gets all over those fingers. It doesn't tear and tear and tear, before you can even get ONE LITTLE SQUARE off the danged tp roll.

    $10,000 dollars. I ABSOLUTELY LOVE CHARMIN!!! YOU"RE THE BEST, CHARMIN!!! TRULY, I KNOW I'm MUCH more convincing than SALLY FIELD selling BonivA!!!!! THan Bob Dole talking about ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION. (wasn't he a cutie pie?) I Listened to you Bob Dole, I really, REALLY did!

    But they actually want you to spend the money to fly up there and THEN tell you why you're the best and show them your resume?

    Sorry, Charmin, I can't really afford or have the time to apply. Is this a joke?

    Dang, I have a really cute little butt too, I think I might HAVE A CHANCE AT it!!

    Does it sound OK if I say I enjoy the restroom if my husband and son remember to put the lid down and I DON"T FALL IN?????

    PLEASE, guys, give me feedback on this. Shall I post I photo of my "attributes"???

    Hilarious; thanks for brightening my day, Charmin and My Meow!

    (hey, that might sound good too!! Feedback please)

    I don't want to be like Carrie Prejean and BLOW my answers....

    Oops, did I say BLOW, hmmm. RUN! GO for it, ladies. Don't HOLD BACK.

    J Bean J Bean, where are ya gal!!! This is a funny topic.

    :Banane45:
    Last edited by Marthatex; 11-03-2009 at 04:28 PM.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon, and the truth. Buddha
    Posts
    22,099
    See, I should win this job hands down but trouble is if I audition I have to bring with me so many props to show why I LOVE going to the bathroom.

    Hey . . .Whaddya thinking here.

    Here is why I enjoy going to the bathroom.

    3 dogs. 2 large 1 little annoying kind. All want my attention NOW

    11 finches. Constant drama in their cage. It wears me out watching them

    1 snake. He's cool.

    And finally;

    One 13 year old boy whose goal in life is to annoy me until I drop stone cold dead from annoyance. That's what it would read on my Death Certificate.

    "Death Due To Extremely Annoying Behavior of Teenager."

    So, for me to audition I would have to show why I like going into the bathroom, locking the door, and just breathing. I would need to bring the animals and annoying teenager to show why I have peace and solitude in that little square room.

    That is until 17 seconds after I lock the door my Treeing Walker Coon Hound throws her body against the door, pops the lock open, and all dogs proceed to come in and beg, whine, and then turn on each other. All of this happens in an area about the size of small stove. Gets a bit crowded when the weiner dog is attacking the treeing coon hound for biting the lab's back leg and chewing on it acting like it's rawhide.

    17 seconds of peace. I LOVE GOING TO THE BATHROOM.

    I don't think my dream of becoming a Charmin rep in NYC is going to happen. I must learn to deal with the disappointment.
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  7. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Colorado
    Posts
    17,715
    I hold your "props" Tricia if you'll hold mine.

    Maybe it could be a team type situation.

    Maybe then I could could consider the flight to New York, but I know if I "scream" too much on the plane I might get kicked off.

    And speaking of Airplane bathrooms - I DO NOT use them, no matter how dire the need.

    So not only do I PROMOTE good toilet paper, I help CONSERVE IT as well!

    ( I doubt that Charmin will want an environmentalist tho; shucks that will disqualify me for sure)

    ANOTHER use of Charmin is when your teenagers paper your neighbor's trees, or a friend's trees.

    Then they are no longer your friends. But that's another good use for Charmin!!!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    33,799
    I'm thinking the guy at the below link might have a shot at it. He could probably say "Charmin's not just for the bathroom. Carry it wherever you go!"

    Man Accidently Pulls Ejector Button While In Jet - Websleuths Crime Sleuthing Community
    Last edited by KateB; 06-07-2015 at 07:55 PM. Reason: repair url tag.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    southwest US
    Posts
    1,687
    OMG, you guys have me in stitches!!!!!!!!


    Tricia, my 14 lb dachshund does the same thing, and if I do not close the door all the way, he finds his way in. Obsessive little dog, he would be attached to me with velcro if he could!

    I think my husband would win. He has set his bathroom (yes he has his own, I would not touch it except to put in gloves and clothespins to clean it) as his home office. He has a magazine rack, makes his business calls from there, etc.

    Too funny!!!!!!!!!!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Colorado
    Posts
    17,715
    OMG!!! That's unbelievable. (ejector man)

    Well, I've been laughing alot at this, but I think I need to go get some things done.

    One advantage of older age is WISDOM, and I've learned that I don't usually win contests.
    Last edited by Marthatex; 11-03-2009 at 05:01 PM.


  11. #11
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    Pacific Northwest
    Posts
    667
    This summer, when I kept the back door open, my geese would come in the house and follow me everywhere, including the bathroom. I had to let them in or they'd honk and wake up the baby. They discovered that toilet paper on a roll is VERY enjoyably chewed, shredded, and eaten. Did they say only humans could apply?

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Colorado
    Posts
    17,715
    Quote Originally Posted by Julessleuther View Post
    OMG, you guys have me in stitches!!!!!!!!


    Tricia, my 14 lb dachshund does the same thing, and if I do not close the door all the way, he finds his way in. Obsessive little dog, he would be attached to me with velcro if he could!

    I think my husband would win. He has set his bathroom (yes he has his own, I would not touch it except to put in gloves and clothespins to clean it) as his home office. He has a magazine rack, makes his business calls from there, etc.

    Too funny!!!!!!!!!!
    It's best ALWAYS to have separate bathrooms. The one thing I hate about going on vacation is SHARING A BATHROOM WITH (ta da!! THE BATHROOM HOGGER)

    I mean, what am I supposed to do when I need to go? Use the trashcan and keep Charmin by the bed????? so usually I RUN in and use it before he even gets up the morning.

    I'm sure my husband could win a prize for sure, cause he's very ANAL about what kind TP we use.

    Oh, yes. Well, now my "chuckles" are starting to turn into "nightmares" (using the trashcan at Yosemite), and resentments.

    Please don't bring back these bad memories. I'd better go check now to make sure I have enough Charmin in every separate bathroom. Would Charmin like to hear about my MENTAL BREAKDOWN, if I go to the bathroom and NOBODY REPLACED THE PAPER?

    In these cases, I am quite resourceful and have learned to fish USED KLEENEX out of the trashcan. Or other soft items. No, Charmin, I don't believe you would choose me, even though I love you.

    Bye now!
    Last edited by Marthatex; 11-03-2009 at 05:14 PM.

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Colorado
    Posts
    17,715
    Quote Originally Posted by PeteyGirl View Post
    This summer, when I kept the back door open, my geese would come in the house and follow me everywhere, including the bathroom. I had to let them in or they'd honk and wake up the baby. They discovered that toilet paper on a roll is VERY enjoyably chewed, shredded, and eaten. Did they say only humans could apply?
    Your goose??? That's hilarious, PeteyGirl.

    "You had to let them in or they'd honk and wake the baby."

    Been there, done that long ago, but I've never had a Goose, just cats, dogs or gerbils.

    Of course now I remember our first dog, a Basset Hound, when we both worked all day - we left him in the house and the toilet paper was from one end of the house to the other.

    Of course now I remember my toddler daughter did exactly the same thing as the dog.

    THERE'S MUCH MORE TO TOILET PAPER THAN MEETS THE ....err....eye!

    I think we could all win the contest!

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    southwest US
    Posts
    1,687
    I think Charmin should just do a commercial on all the ways that toilet paper is used. Dogs chew it up (and geese!), kids pulll it all over the house, teenagers use it to TP houses! Heck, this halloween my son had a halloween party and they used the TP to make mummies out of the kids for a game!

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    southwest US
    Posts
    1,687
    I think Charmin should just do a commercial on all the ways that toilet paper is used. Dogs chew it up (and geese!), kids pulll it all over the house, teenagers use it to TP houses! Heck, this halloween my son had a halloween party and they used the TP to make mummies out of the kids for a game!

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