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  1. #1
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    Army Mom Refuses Deployment

    SAVANNAH, Ga. An Army cook and single mom may face criminal charges after she skipped her deployment flight to Afghanistan because, she said, no one was available to care for her infant son while she was overseas.

    Spc. Alexis Hutchinson, 21, claims she had no choice but to refuse deployment orders because the only family she had to care for her 10-month-old son her mother was overwhelmed by the task, already caring for three other relatives with health problems.


    http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/ap_on_re_...mom_deployment

    In the article, it states that this young woman's mom is caring for her mother, sister, and a disabled daughter AND running a daycare with 14 children during the day. Probably forthe best that grandma couldn't/wouldn't care for the child, he'd have probably been neglected, anyway, due to the sheer volume of other children/people needing care at that house.

    So, this young lady states she has no other family to take care of her child. Hard to believe, but ok, let's say that's true. Get a friend. At one time, she had at least one "friend," because she didn't get pregnant alone.

    I really have a hard time with what I see as a person who signed up for the military to draw a steady paycheck and get all the other "perks" (medical insurance, housing, etc.) and now that she might have to face some real danger, wants to stay home. Her plans may have fallen through with her mom, but I find it really really hard to believe that she has absolutely no one who can step up to care for this child. If that is, indeed the case, then perhaps she shouldn't have gotten pregnant in the first place, knowing she was enlisted in the military, and deployment was a very real possibility.

    I have a niece who is a captain in the Army, who often jokes about having a "furlough baby," so she won't have to be deployed again (at least for a while). Apparently, it happens. (Incidentially, my niece is on her 3rd tour over in Iraq.)

    This mother would get a lot more sympathy from me if her attitude was, "just give me a month to find other arrangements, then I'll deploy."

  2. #2
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    I have such mixed feelings about this.

    While ITA that these moms should have thought about this for the 9 months they were pregnant and since the baby was born - IOW, it shouldn't be a shock that there is no babysitter the day your flight is supposed to leave! - I also worry about some rule being made that will separate mothers who truly do have a change of circumstances.

    Playing Devil's Advocate, what if she truly thought her mother could/would care for her baby. Obviously the mother cares for other children, and there are at least 14 parents who find her qualified. But then she goes to visit and maybe bring some things over for him, and witnesses chaos or worse which makes her fear for his safety while she is gone.

    She asks the army for more time, and they tell her to drop off the kid and get her ass on the plane.

    What would you do?

    Not saying that this is what I think happened, but it is definitely a complication of so many women in today's military. Not every pregnancy is planned, and yet some ARE planned to avoid deployment. I really feel for the people who have to make the decisions about who goes and who stays. It must be a nightmare.

  3. #3
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    There were plenty of "patriotic pregnancies" when my wasband was deployed to Iraq.
    According to Army policy, one MUST have a family care plan in place in order to stay in the military.
    Deployments are part of being in the military, and anyone who has enlisted since 9/11 is well aware that they WILL BE deployed. It's not a "MAY BE" anymore.
    I have a very hard time having sympathy for this woman. Her son is 10 months old. I wonder how long her mother has been caring for the other family members? Surely this situation didn't arise all of a sudden...bottom line is this woman neglected her DUTY as a soldier, period. It sucks, but when you're in the Army, the Army comes first. That's how it has to be in order for our country to maintain our top-notch military. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt and assume that she thought she'd be able to work something out, but...
    Now she will likely receive a dishonorable discharge, which will be a black mark on her record forever. Finding a job will be difficult. I have to wonder WTH she was thinking...
    "Lost is not alone..." T. Miller, Founder TES (and MY HERO!!!)

    "I am only one, but I am one. I cannot do everything, but I can do something. And because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do the something that I can do. What I can do, I should do. And what I should do, by the grace of God, I will." -

    Edward Everett Hale

  4. #4
    EmMomma's Avatar
    EmMomma is offline Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult
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    Quote Originally Posted by EmMomma View Post
    There were plenty of "patriotic pregnancies" when my wasband was deployed to Iraq.
    According to Army policy, one MUST have a family care plan in place in order to stay in the military.
    Deployments are part of being in the military, and anyone who has enlisted since 9/11 is well aware that they WILL BE deployed. It's not a "MAY BE" anymore.
    I have a very hard time having sympathy for this woman. Her son is 10 months old. I wonder how long her mother has been caring for the other family members? Surely this situation didn't arise all of a sudden...bottom line is this woman neglected her DUTY as a soldier, period. It sucks, but when you're in the Army, the Army comes first. That's how it has to be in order for our country to maintain our top-notch military. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt and assume that she thought she'd be able to work something out, but...
    Now she will likely receive a dishonorable discharge, which will be a black mark on her record forever. Finding a job will be difficult. I have to wonder WTH she was thinking...

    ETA: I've contemplated going into the military several times in my adult life. The TWO REASONS I never have are my DD's. Just sayin'...

    Oops. I didn't mean to quote myself.
    "Lost is not alone..." T. Miller, Founder TES (and MY HERO!!!)

    "I am only one, but I am one. I cannot do everything, but I can do something. And because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do the something that I can do. What I can do, I should do. And what I should do, by the grace of God, I will." -

    Edward Everett Hale

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by EmMomma View Post
    There were plenty of "patriotic pregnancies" when my wasband was deployed to Iraq.
    ...bottom line is this woman neglected her DUTY as a soldier, period. It sucks, but when you're in the Army, the Army comes first. That's how it has to be in order for our country to maintain our top-notch military. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt and assume that she thought she'd be able to work something out, but...
    Now she will likely receive a dishonorable discharge, which will be a black mark on her record forever. Finding a job will be difficult. I have to wonder WTH she was thinking...
    (respectfully snipped by me)
    ITA...my niece would LOVE to have children, but as you stated above, right now in her life, the Army comes first. She knew that when she re-upped. At times, it's hard on her because she's in her early 30s and she wonders if she'll ever have kids, but she knew that that would be the case when she re-enlisted.

  6. #6
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    You sign up, you do the time... if you don't want to go they should throw the book at you...

    With a VOLUNTEER army you can't say you didnt know what you were signing up for.
    Lashelle


    "Remember, They will never buy the cow if they can get the eggs for free! " ... Kelly Bundy

  7. #7
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    I don't find it credible that she'd suddenly realize her mom couldn't take care of her child just before she deployed. A single-parent soldier who's liable to be deployed is required to have a child-care plan in place. Either she wasn't honest in her plan or she isn't being honest now. She knew about her mom's other commitments. This situation is of her own making, and she's going to have to take the consequences.

  8. #8
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    I can not believe for one second that she put fourth exhaustive effort to find proper care for her child while she fullfilled her obligation. My initial response was "she didn't ask me, we would have kept him." I would imagine there are thousands of others out there who would be willing to step in and help our service men and women.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Carla Lashelle View Post
    You sign up, you do the time... if you don't want to go they should throw the book at you...

    With a VOLUNTEER army you can't say you didnt know what you were signing up for.
    I'll go one step further....jail time, as well as having to pay back everything you've been given. With interest.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by oh_gal View Post
    I'll go one step further....jail time, as well as having to pay back everything you've been given. With interest.
    I hope the Army doesn't jail her, for the child's sake only.

    One thing that just occurred to me is to wonder why the grandmother would put caring for "relatives" over caring for her granddaughter. Seems the relatives should be the ones told that it's too overwhelming to care for them while she's responsible for her granddaughter.


  11. #11
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    Shouldn't she still be on maternity leave, anyway, if the child is only 10 months old? (Or is the standard one year leave a Canadian thing that Americans don't do?)

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by WhyaDuck? View Post
    Shouldn't she still be on maternity leave, anyway, if the child is only 10 months old? (Or is the standard one year leave a Canadian thing that Americans don't do?)
    One year??!!! Holy Cow!!! 6 weeks for vaginal birth, 8 for C-Section. And, at least every place I've worked in my state, it's unpaid. Unless you use your vacation/sick leave. At my current job, I can also use a Medical Leave of Absence with partial pay. If I want to take any more time that "what is given", it would be unpaid.

  13. #13
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    I believe if they are Active Duty, they can be deployed after 4 months, but don't quote me on that.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lyn1001 View Post
    One year??!!! Holy Cow!!! 6 weeks for vaginal birth, 8 for C-Section. And, at least every place I've worked in my state, it's unpaid. Unless you use your vacation/sick leave. At my current job, I can also use a Medical Leave of Absence with partial pay. If I want to take any more time that "what is given", it would be unpaid.
    Here, you get half your pay for a year. I didn't, because I am a student and a seasonal worker, but if you work for 50 weeks, full time, prior to the birth/leave starting, you get half your pay for one year's mat leave.

    Sorry for going off topic - the story just confused me because of that. Cultural differences, I guess.

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by STEADFAST View Post
    I hope the Army doesn't jail her, for the child's sake only.

    One thing that just occurred to me is to wonder why the grandmother would put caring for "relatives" over caring for her granddaughter. Seems the relatives should be the ones told that it's too overwhelming to care for them while she's responsible for her granddaughter.
    You are much sweeter than I am.
    OK...jail time only if there was intent to defraud the gov't by not carrying out her end of the bargain.

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