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  1. #1
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    In her shoes...

    I realize everyone reacts differently to tragedy and loss. I've always been one to try and put myself in someone else's shoes and try and figure out how I would react in their position.

    Obviously, there has been many discussions as to how KC reacted and the how this would differ from any "normal" mother. Much of her guilt is present simply through her actions and reactions.

    I thought it would be interesting to see how others feel they would react in her position - with the assumption she is innnocent (I know that is hard!).

    I have four kids, so I would in some cases react differently than a parent with one child (because my other children would still need me). But assuming I had one child and I lost her, here is my best guess as to how I would respond to various situations:

    ** For some reason, I have waited 30 days to report my daughter missing, I'm finally on the phone with the police getting help - I would cry, fall to my knees, no one would probably understand a word I said. My daughter is gone

    ** LE and everyone is pointing the finger at me. Maybe I'm Schizophrenic, maybe im a psycopath with amnesia. I would question my own innocence and sanity. My daughter is gone

    ** Do I get an attorney? No, those that have the most chance of finding my daughter are right in front of me. My daughter is gone

    ** Will I take a lie detector test? I would test cyanide if I thought it would help. My daughter is gone

    ** I'm in jail, I have some money on my books. Would I buy snackes? I would donate it to any charity or cause that could help in the search. My daughter is gone

    ** My brother is visiting me. Do I speak in code? Why would I? My daughter is gone

    ** My parents are here. Do I complain about my situation? NO. My daughter is gone

    ** Someone tells a joke. Something good happens to me. I would not smile nor laugh again. My daughter is gone

    ** The state persues the death penalty. Kill me now. My daughter is gone
    Last edited by SFW; 12-18-2009 at 10:58 PM.

  2. #2
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    Well, I am the mother of only one child, a daughter.

    But, I know I could never make it past 30 minutes with my daughter 'missing'/'abducted' and not calling the authorities, let alone 31 days!
    .... ....... My posts are my opinion, only.

  3. #3
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    If one of my 3 children were missing for 1 minute...I would be hysterical!
    The 31 days...is the clincher....how will Jose ever explain this? "Ugly Coping" is a joke

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pattymarie View Post
    If one of my 3 children were missing for 1 minute...I would be hysterical!
    The 31 days...is the clincher....how will Jose ever explain this? "Ugly Coping" is a joke
    The only way to explain it in my opinion is a movie type of defense. "If you contact the police we will know..."

    The issues with this, and there are many, that the kidnappers are asking for something which even KC has not stated. Additionally, even if this were the case nothing would explain her actions during those 31 days.

  5. #5
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    My cat once got out of the window and I was crying hysterically looking for him outside. Luckily I found him across the street hiding in the bushes. If one of my children went missing, I would be calling the police, family, neighbors, running around, shouting for them, etc......her behavior is the behavior of someone that wanted her child to be "missing" so that she can go on with her so called "life"

  6. #6
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    Stepping in the land of make believe and pretending Casey is innocent and finds herself on the phone with 911 and in the custody of detectives it seems to me the natural reaction is fear, crying, trembling, believing that you are doing exactly what the "kidnapper" told you not to do.

    I would be pleading to keep this out of the news before they saw me on the news. Crying and pleading that they don't understand, crying that I want to explain but I can't.

    That would be a woman in a high level of distress to suddenly find herself out of control of the situation and losing their only negotiating point with the "kidnapper". She would think that her daughter was at the height of danger at that moment. It would be a huge escalation in already horrid situation.

    Kind of the polar opposite of the ice queen and her "you are bothering" me attitude. Casey's only interest was herself (just like the every day that preceded this one).

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by impatientredhead View Post
    Stepping in the land of make believe and pretending Casey is innocent and finds herself on the phone with 911 and in the custody of detectives it seems to me the natural reaction is fear, crying, trembling, believing that you are doing exactly what the "kidnapper" told you not to do.

    I would be pleading to keep this out of the news before they saw me on the news. Crying and pleading that they don't understand, crying that I want to explain but I can't.

    That would be a woman in a high level of distress to suddenly find herself out of control of the situation and losing their only negotiating point with the "kidnapper". She would think that her daughter was at the height of danger at that moment. It would be a huge escalation in already horrid situation.

    Kind of the polar opposite of the ice queen and her "you are bothering" me attitude. Casey's only interest was herself (just like the every day that preceded this one).
    I cannot believe I never thought of this. IF you were instructed not to contact the police this would definitely be in your mind. Surely, she would have mentioned several times her fear that the kidnappers would find out that she contacted police.

  8. #8
    If your child is missing, you call the police.

    If you're afraid your kidnapped child will be harmed if you call the police, you hot foot it home to your dad, the former LE, and say "Please God help me, Dad. I'm terrified and I don't know what to do."

    If your child has an accidental mishap, and dies, and you're scared to call the police, you call your mother, the registered nurse, and say "Please God help me, Mom. Something really horrible has happened, and I don't know what to do."

    I can't get through 31 days of partying and skanking around. I just can't get through 31 days of anything at all except maybe lying in bed, crying incessantly, babbling incoherently, peeing myself, vomiting uncontrollably, and needing to be taken to the hospital. Or laying there unable to speak, or talk, or move, and needing to be taken to the hospital.

    She didn't even cry. She partied.

  9. #9
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    I don't post much but you brought a feeling to me with this post.

    The other night I was watching my beautiful granddaughter - age 4-.

    She decided to play hide and go seek...I couldn't find her. Well, I totally flipped out. She wouldn't answer me.. I threw open all the bedrooms doors, looking for her. I had a fear of dread.... :-(

    I think she heard the anguish in my voice and came out hiding from her grandfathers chair.. I almost cried but was sooo happy to see her.

    It was a horrible feeling that I had, losing her for a few min's.

    There is NO WAY I COULD WAIT 31 DAYS!!!!!!!

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by smart blonde View Post
    Well, I am the mother of only one child, a daughter.

    But, I know I could never make it past 30 minutes with my daughter 'missing'/'abducted' and not calling the authorities, let alone 31 days!
    Me too. And I used to freak if I couldn't see her for 30 seconds in a grocery store. But if she had not reported her own only daughter missing, they might not have found my daughter again because I would have personally taken her out!
    "Anyone who has the power to make you believe absurdities has the power to make you commit injustices" - Voltaire


  11. #11
    Phumi's Avatar
    Phumi is offline Founding Member of AFKBPOFPOPL and Mulch Princess
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    As long as we are playing this game, let's assume the babysitter/Zanny story is true.
    If I had a nanny whom I trusted, and I went one day to pick up my daughter and she was not there, and the nanny's cell was "no longer in service" I would not assume my daughter had been kidnapped. I would start calling hospitals and the police to see if there had been an accident. I would think something had happened to both of them, not that my fabulous, nanny had stolen my baby.
    Last edited by Phumi; 12-19-2009 at 12:02 AM.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Phumi View Post
    As long as we are playing this game, let's assume the babysitter/Zanny story is true.
    If I had a nanny whom I trusted, and I went one day to pick up my daughter and she was not there, and her cell was "no longer in service" I would not assume she had been kidnapped. I would start calling hospitals and the police to see if there had been an accident. I would think something had happened to both of them, not that my fabulous, nanny had stloen my baby.
    Exactly and if my nanny of the year had taken my child and for some totally unbelievable reason I could not tell my friends or family or the police I would take my imaginary 14k out of the bank and hirer the most unethical private detective I could come up with. One that would bend and break the rules to track this B@tch down and get my child. In this make believe scenario someone would be dead at my hands but it would not be my child.

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Macara View Post
    I don't post much but you brought a feeling to me with this post.

    The other night I was watching my beautiful granddaughter - age 4-.

    She decided to play hide and go seek...I couldn't find her. Well, I totally flipped out. She wouldn't answer me.. I threw open all the bedrooms doors, looking for her. I had a fear of dread.... :-(

    I think she heard the anguish in my voice and came out hiding from her grandfathers chair.. I almost cried but was sooo happy to see her.

    It was a horrible feeling that I had, losing her for a few min's.

    There is NO WAY I COULD WAIT 31 DAYS!!!!!!!
    Believe me I've been there. My youngest girls have a habit of hiding on us as a joke. One time they hid in our dog house and I almost flipped out.

    They were gone for less than ten minutes and I had the phone in my hand to call the police when my wife came back. For some reason all she had to do was call their names angrily and they came running out immediately

    Point being, that I never once questioned calling the police I was absolutely frantic. I wanted help and I wanted it now. I would have called the president if I had his number.
    Last edited by SFW; 12-19-2009 at 12:04 AM.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by impatientredhead View Post
    Exactly and if my nanny of the year had taken my child and for some totally unbelievable reason I could not tell my friends or family or the police I would take my imaginary 14k out of the bank and hirer the most unethical private detective I could come up with. One that would bend and break the rules to track this B@tch down and get my child. In this make believe scenario someone would be dead at my hands but it would not be my child.
    Good point. And isn't it strange that she didn't investigate any of the people she is trying to throw under the bus right now? JG??

  15. #15
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    Let the world never Forget.....

    Casey NEVER called the Police - - - - - - Cindy did


    Last edited by tasylshari; 12-19-2009 at 12:09 AM.

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