Found Deceased TX - Leanne Bearden, 33, Garden Ridge, 17 Jan 2014 #11

peace9274 · Feb 15, 2014

ellabella said:
It's possible there was a drug contribution, but mefloquine isn't the only malaria drug, and most people don't take t after reading about the side effects.

I do know, however, two people very closely who suffered severe mental health issues due to mefloquine.

There seems to have been 'something' (anxiety?) definitely going on with Leanne during
the final days/weeks of their journey. Josh said - at the FB page - that Leanne had stated
she was afraid to return to the US. I keep wondering what it was she was afraid of.

AbbeyR · Feb 15, 2014

Hi everyone, I've been following this thread but haven't posted. What a heartbreaking outcome. I'm so sorry for Leanne and her loved ones.

I just wanted to weigh in on the anti-malarials convo- I've taken Lariam (mefloquine) long term and know many others who have too. It does have a side effects that are relatively common, like insomnia, vivid dreams and sometimes auditory hallucinations. I have also heard of people having more severe psychological symptoms, but this is rare. I would think that if you started experiencing negative symptoms, you and those around you would know. It's also easy to find alternatives, even abroad.

I didn't think Lariam was even prescribed very often anymore as there are better options now, with less side effects.

SStarr33 · Feb 15, 2014

ami said:
Interesting! I wasn't aware of that at all. I now feel really weird for having taken it so long, though again I ran into so many people who chose that particular drug because it was convenient & deemed most effective in the region we were in, and I didn't know of any who personally experienced more than just a few vivid dreams. Reading the potential side effects suddenly makes it seem much more of a gamble. But that's probably true of reading the potential side effects of a lot of things I use (aspartame comes to mind...)

It said that "11-17% of travelers are incapacitated to some degree" which seems like a lot to me. I wonder if they consider vivid dreams incapacitation?

Anyways, we have no idea if she was taking this drug. I just wanted to mention it in case her family or friends were reading here so they could look into it.

peace9274 · Feb 15, 2014

justaparent said:
The 'Friends of' Facebook page seems to have been removed, unless it's just my system.

I understand why they would feel that's the best decision now that the search has come to an end. There's no need for friends and family to monitor and deal with hateful comments.

I saw that also.

cluciano63 · Feb 15, 2014

peace9274 said:
There seems to be something definitely going on during the final days/weeks of their journey. Josh said at the FB page that Leanne had stated she was afraid to return to the US. I keep wondering what it was she was afraid of.

If she was, I feel she may have been dreading the return to a lifestyle that she no longer found acceptable. They had to get back to finding high-paying jobs that fit their qualifications, possibly save for a big house, maybe get pregnant...maybe Leanne had a very different idea of life by then, other than ending up a so-called "soccer mom" in a suburb of Denver, competing at work, competing to have the "perfect" child, car-pooling, etc...it may have sounded tedious and banal to her after sampling so many cultures where work and wealth do not top the list of what is important. And if she felt J was eager to return, she may have been even more frightened of the future. And it may have been impossible for her to tell him...i.e let him/others down.

JMO

ami · Feb 15, 2014

justaparent said:
The 'Friends of' Facebook page seems to have been removed, unless it's just my system.

I understand why they would feel that's the best decision now that the search has come to an end. There's no need for friends and family to monitor and deal with hateful comments.

I'm glad they took it down. I'll never understand people who try to kick grieving people while they're helpless and vulnerable. Thinking of the woman who ran that fb page having to read through the hate as she deleted it, while grieving her friend... well, they have much more important things to do right now.

Is anyone here close enough to run the 5K? I wish I could.

StuckinNewEng · Feb 15, 2014

Kimster said:
One of our members asked me to share this article. I mentioned this case yesterday. The author hopes it helps us as we grasp some kind of understanding of suicide. I felt Part 4 was extremely helpful to me.

I've linked each part so you can find them easily.

Part 1: http://www.correctionsone.com/corre...e-Life-after-the-suicide-of-a-loved-one-pt-1/

Part 2: http://www.correctionsone.com/corre...Life-after-the-suicide-of-a-loved-one-part-2/

Part 3: http://www.correctionsone.com/corre...e-Life-after-the-suicide-of-a-loved-one-pt-3/

Part 4: http://www.correctionsone.com/corre...e-Life-after-the-suicide-of-a-loved-one-pt-4/

Kimster, thank you a million times for this! On behalf of me, please thank the member that suggested posting it as well. The thanks button wasn't enough. I didn't want to comment on any personal dealings with suicide on Leanne's thread, but I had to at least thank you after reading that. Part 4 was very important to me. My older brother, who was a police officer, shot and killed himself at the age of 32, ten years ago. Ironically enough, he was in Lockhart, the town where I just read Leanne's autopsy was completed. No matter how many years pass, my grief never lessens because each day just becomes one more since the last time I got to talk to him and hug him.

Anyway, I needed this article. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
And I apologize for posting this on Leanne's thread, but I definitely wanted to show my appreciation.

Rip Leanne...

ellabella · Feb 15, 2014

The "vivid" dreams my friends had were about rivers of blood, dead bodies, graphic murder scenes.

There was also someone involved in organization who murdered a local based on hallucinations from their meds, but I don't know a lot of details on his case.

Again though, there are so many better options, I don't know why someone would choose to take Larium, IMO. Again this is all irrelevant if she wasn't taking it.

As an aside, it's hard t describe the anxiety of returning home. I have an extremely close family, as in my best friends are my family and I was terrified. And like I said 10 years on it is still a constant struggle to not run away and be the person I feel like I truly am and not the person I am "supposed" to be.

ami · Feb 15, 2014

ellabella said:
The "vivid" dreams my friends had were about rivers of blood, dead bodies, graphic murder scenes.

There was also someone involved in organization who murdered a local based on hallucinations from their meds, but I don't know a lot of details on his case.

Again though, there are so many better options, I don't know why someone would choose to take Larium, IMO. Again this is all irrelevant if she wasn't taking it.

As an aside, it's hard t describe the anxiety of returning home. I have an extremely close family, as in my best friends are my family and I was terrified. And like I said 10 years on it is still a constant struggle to not run away and be the person I feel like I truly am and not the person I am "supposed" to be.

In my case this drug was recommended to me by my travel doc, and this was the case for most people I met in my travels as well (who were taking the same drug). I don't know that there actually were any better options for where the places I was living - this was the top choice, and the others were considered back-ups, and yes reading the side effects makes it look like russian roulette but that's not how it really played out. But whatever, I know this isn't relevant unless it was a factor for Leanne, and we may never know if it was.

My most vivid malaria pill dream was actually one based on fear of returning home. I was getting "sucked" home through a vortex and fighting it. In all of this tragic story, Leanne's fear/anxiety of returning home is the emotion I can relate to the most strongly.

MeSeek · Feb 15, 2014

Oh wow, geesh. I had no idea she had his backpack and both of their wedding rings!

Oye!

Now, this malaria pill hunch is interesting. That never would have crossed my mind.

Leomoon80 · Feb 15, 2014

peace9274 said:
There seems to have been 'something' (anxiety?) definitely going on with Leanne during
the final days/weeks of their journey. Josh said - at the FB page - that Leanne had stated
she was afraid to return to the US. I keep wondering what it was she was afraid of.

for MeSeek: Is it true she had both of their wedding rings? Where did you read this?

IF so, then that speaks volumes, imo.

Elley Mae · Feb 15, 2014

MeSeek said:
Oh wow, geesh. I had no idea she had his backpack and both of their wedding rings!

Oye!

Now, this malaria pill hunch is interesting. That never would have crossed my mind.

Looking for link to, both of the weddings bands and not finding, could you link please. tia

Kimster · Feb 15, 2014

StuckinNewEng said:
Kimster, thank you a million times for this! On behalf of me, please thank the member that suggested posting it as well. The thanks button wasn't enough. I didn't want to comment on any personal dealings with suicide on Leanne's thread, but I had to at least thank you after reading that. Part 4 was very important to me. My older brother, who was a police officer, shot and killed himself at the age of 32, ten years ago. Ironically enough, he was in Lockhart, the town where I just read Leanne's autopsy was completed. No matter how many years pass, my grief never lessens because each day just becomes one more since the last time I got to talk to him and hug him.

Anyway, I needed this article. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
And I apologize for posting this on Leanne's thread, but I definitely wanted to show my appreciation.

Rip Leanne...

I will pass this on right away! He wrote the article just for you :hug:, believe me. :rose:

Elley Mae · Feb 15, 2014

http://www.mysanantonio.com/news/local/article/Family-Missing-woman-did-not-walk-away-5159834.php

Leanne Bearden also had her wedding and engagement rings when she left, family members said.

http://www.denverpost.com/news/ci_25136419/body-missing-colorado-woman-leanne-bearden-found-texas

O'Conner told local media the deceased woman was wearing a ring that appeared identical to that of Bearden's.

...............

Police say they have confirmed the body through identification on the body, as well as through two wedding rings, which were publically shows throughout the long probe.

Read more: http://www.woai.com/articles/woai-l...found-in-garden-ridge-12065516/#ixzz2tPaXMhVL

bbm ?

Wherearewenow · Feb 15, 2014

When someone commits suicide, the hardest part for us as survivors is try to make logical sense of something that was executed by someone that was not making any logical sense at the time.
Leanne was described as a people-pleaser. The one that was there to lift someone up when they are down.
If she was suffering from a darkness that was so unfamiliar to her and so overwhelming, the people-pleaser in her maybe did not know how to be the one that NEEDED the help.
Being vulnerable is very scary... and when you are the one that is dark and depressed-you are never thinking clearly.
She mentioned in their blog that they were forever changed for their travel experience... perhaps going to back to her old life as a new person was much more terrifying to her than we will ever know.
An identity-crisis, if you will.
We don't know if she shared any fears or sadness with her closest confidantes.
I doubt that these friends would betray her by posting their conversations on Facebook.
Perhaps now these friends will come forward and share with her husband and her family, so the puzzle pieces will slowly come together and make a small iota of sense. And maybe, just maybe, they will find some peace.
That is what my prayers are for. Every day.

ami · Feb 15, 2014

Elley Mae said:
http://www.mysanantonio.com/news/local/article/Family-Missing-woman-did-not-walk-away-5159834.php

Leanne Bearden also had her wedding and engagement rings when she left, family members said.

http://www.denverpost.com/news/ci_25136419/body-missing-colorado-woman-leanne-bearden-found-texas

O'Conner told local media the deceased woman was wearing a ring that appeared identical to that of Bearden's.

...............

Police say they have confirmed the body through identification on the body, as well as through two wedding rings, which were publically shows throughout the long probe.

Read more: http://www.woai.com/articles/woai-l...found-in-garden-ridge-12065516/#ixzz2tPaXMhVL

bbm ?

I don't know this for a fact, but Josh did say that he bought her an anniversary ring that was identical to her wedding ring, and she wore both of them with her engagement ring. So maybe the "two wedding rings" were her two identical rings (one wedding, one anniversary). Josh for sure would have mentioned if his own wedding ring had been missing.

Leomoon80 · Feb 15, 2014

Wherearewenow said:
When someone commits suicide, the hardest part for us as survivors is try to make logical sense of something that was executed by someone that was not making any logical sense at the time.
Leanne was described as a people-pleaser. The one that was there to lift someone up when they are down.If she was suffering from a darkness that was so unfamiliar to her and so overwhelming, the people-pleaser in her maybe did not know how to be the one that NEEDED the help.Being vulnerable is very scary... and when you are the one that is dark and depressed-you are never thinking clearly.
She mentioned in their blog that they were forever changed for their travel experience... perhaps going to back to her old life as a new person was much more terrifying to her than we will ever know.
An identity-crisis, if you will.
We don't know if she shared any fears or sadness with her closest confidantes.
I doubt that these friends would betray her by posting their conversations on Facebook.
Perhaps now these friends will come forward and share with her husband and her family, so the puzzle pieces will slowly come together and make a small iota of sense. And maybe, just maybe, they will find some peace.
That is what my prayers are for. Every day.

Very true what you are saying, about those who are people pleasers and vulnerable.

I wrote in an ebook kindle on amazon, about my own experiences here when my daughter was lost to suicide about Leanne's age. Actually, she was 2 years younger then Leanne and I'm thinking that if she had a bi polar disorder, it's not easily seen except those who know her well. (blowing hot and cold).

ebook I wrote:

http://www.websleuths.com/forums/showthread.php?t=59655&page=17

Wherearewenow · Feb 15, 2014

Leomoon80 said:
Very true what you are saying, about those who are people pleasers and vulnerable.

I wrote in an ebook kindle on amazon, about my own experiences here when my daughter was lost to suicide about Leanne's age. Actually, she was 2 years younger then Leanne and I'm thinking that if she had a bi polar disorder, it's not easily seen except those who know her well. (blowing hot and cold).

ebook I wrote:

http://www.websleuths.com/forums/showthread.php?t=59655&page=17

Leomoon, I am so sorry that you lost your daughter... I can not even imagine. And I respect you greatly for sharing your story.
I personally know several people that developed bi-polar in their 30s. Usually from a significant life event that acts as a trigger. Some have subtle symptoms; while others are more severe.
I am so sorry for your loss.

TxLady2 · Feb 15, 2014

cluciano63 said:
I think a lot of us here have experienced suicide...and know that there are no explanations that make sense, or even that we will ever believe. Sometimes people are even offended, thinking they were not reason enough to live for, but I doubt the person who goes this route is thinking that way at all. They are seeing a bleak or hopeful future, for whatever reason and choose not to go forward. I guess what I am saying, it is not about "us" (those left behind).

You are so right! It isn't about "us" or "them" or the family they leave behind. Those who are having such a hard time believing she did this, should stop to think... it was not about Josh, or her own family, it was about HER and her need to end her pain. We did not know her, we have no idea what her reasons were, or what she was going through.

When you think about it, suicide is a selfish act. At that point in time, they are only thinking of ending whatever torment is going through their minds. It's more about the pain they're living through, than it is about what it will do to their loved ones.

TxLady2 · Feb 15, 2014

Elainera said:
What is the difference? I would have thought manner of death is hanging and cod is asphyxiation? Is that wrong?

Manner of death would be suicide. There are only a few deaths that fall in that category... homicide, suicide and natural causes. There are numerous causes of death, too many to list. But the manner of death is suicide, and the COD is asphyxiation by hanging.

Found Deceased TX - Leanne Bearden, 33, Garden Ridge, 17 Jan 2014 #11

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