"Oops! You're not dead yet" comment

[chemgirl]

I apologize if this has been mentioned on here before (I spent several hours catching up on my reading here on the forum, and I didn't see it).
On p.349 of Kolar's book, this really made my eyes widen:
Regarding his viewing of a videotape of Dr. Susanne Bernhard's early-in-the-aftermath interview with BR on January 8, 1997, he writes, "I was taken aback at another comment offered during the playing of a board game. The nature of the game involved guessing the features of faces hidden on the opponent's side of the game board. Burke had mistakenly flipped down a face on his side of the board and then returned it to an upright position, commenting: 'Oops, you're not dead yet.' This off-hand comment seemed extremely callous and suggested little care or concern for the circumstances at hand. I would later think that this comment might have its source in the events surrounding the death of Jon Benet."

Kind-of gives one a chill...

[hetty]

Wow...

[LadyL]

I'm RDI and that comment means nothing to me

people see sinister meaning where they want to, especially if they have an agenda - they want to use every little thing as a building block toward the creation of their truth when in fact, the majority of those little things have nothing to do with the truth IMO

Kolar condemns a child for making a comment that Kolar views as extremely callous, whereas others might think what an unfortunate choice of words but the poor child doesn't realize it

c'mon - it's a child and heck, even an adult could've easily said something inappropriate in the same circumstances

can I ask a question of those who've read or are reading the book? does it seem as though Kolar is trying to make a case for Burke being a sociopath? was the passage above noted in that context?

[DeeDee249]

I'll have more to say after I read the book, but I will say that as of this point, I do not believe BR is or was a sociopath. I think he did exhibit some "dissociative disorder" stereotypic behavior at the time, and he just seemed/looked like an odd kid. (MOO). I think there was a lot of disfunction in the family and likely some sibling rivalry (which occurs in most families). I think BR, having been caught "playing doctor" on occasion, took a dominant position over his little (and in his mind, more favored) sister when he could, and at some point that night, JB ended up bashed into a coma. His parents covered it up, having lost JB and not wanting to lose BR as well (figuratively if not literally) went into overdrive, adrenaline-fueled mode that night. One action led to another to the point of no return. Had judge who sealed the phone records had a spine, I think THERE would be the beginning of the unravelling of this case. From those first, awful, early-morning moments of the 25/26th, one step led to another. Like a child telling a lie, when questioned, one lie begets another until the point of no return. Then, they CAN'T look back. Now the truth CAN'T be told, because all the lies that preceded it might rock Boulder all the way to the (then) Governor's office, if not higher (Lockeed?).

[Britt]

I find the comment alarming in light of the totality of information, evidence and witness statements reported in Kolar's book.

If the comment had occurred in a vacuum, I could more easily attribute it to a mindless kid thing to say while playing a game.

[hetty]

Yes, thats it..there are many little things which of themselves mean nothing, but taken as a whole paint a sad picture...but perhaps I am just seeing things, I do acknowledge that.

[txsvicki]

I wonder what board game it was. I can't imagine a kid saying that during any kid's board game but it sounds like a memory game and it was a flipped down face that he associated as dead once it was down. He won by it being dead and not his skills and memory? Wow. Even nintendo wasn't violent back then. The little men just fell or whatever and had to start over so that can not be blamed..

[gypsychild]

Originally Posted by txsvicki

I wonder what board game it was. I can't imagine a kid saying that during any kid's board game but it sounds like a memory game and it was a flipped down face that he associated as dead once it was down. He won by it being dead and not his skills and memory? Wow. Even nintendo wasn't violent back then. The little men just fell or whatever and had to start over so that can not be blamed..

IMO it sounds like "Guess Who?" - one of my kids favorite games when they were little.

Guess Who? - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Guess Who? - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Guess Who? - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

[passionflower]

Originally Posted by DeeDee249

I'll have more to say after I read the book, but I will say that as of this point, I do not believe BR is or was a sociopath. I think he did exhibit some "dissociative disorder" stereotypic behavior at the time, and he just seemed/looked like an odd kid. (MOO). I think there was a lot of disfunction in the family and likely some sibling rivalry (which occurs in most families). I think BR, having been caught "playing doctor" on occasion, took a dominant position over his little (and in his mind, more favored) sister when he could, and at some point that night, JB ended up bashed into a coma. His parents covered it up, having lost JB and not wanting to lose BR as well (figuratively if not literally) went into overdrive, adrenaline-fueled mode that night. One action led to another to the point of no return. Had judge who sealed the phone records had a spine, I think THERE would be the beginning of the unravelling of this case. From those first, awful, early-morning moments of the 25/26th, one step led to another. Like a child telling a lie, when questioned, one lie begets another until the point of no return. Then, they CAN'T look back. Now the truth CAN'T be told, because all the lies that preceded it might rock Boulder all the way to the (then) Governor's office, if not higher (Lockeed?).

I totally agree with you. Do we know what BR does for a living or if he has emotional problems? He has been ke[pt out of the limelight so to speak as an adult.

[DeeDee249]

Originally Posted by passionflower

I totally agree with you. Do we know what BR does for a living or if he has emotional problems? He has been ke[pt out of the limelight so to speak as an adult.

I think he keeps a low profile- he did graduate college and he works. Not sure where. Only those closest to him would know whether he has emotional problems. If he does, it wouldn't be surprising, but obviously they are not so severe that the general public would know.

[txsvicki]

In reading various book reviews and comments i saw a mention of 3 drawings done by burke. Does anyone know if they are online to be viewed anywhere? I can't find any but seem to recall they were able to be seen some years back.

[midwest mama]

Originally Posted by DeeDee249

I'll have more to say after I read the book, but I will say that as of this point, I do not believe BR is or was a sociopath. I think he did exhibit some "dissociative disorder" stereotypic behavior at the time, and he just seemed/looked like an odd kid. (MOO). I think there was a lot of disfunction in the family and likely some sibling rivalry (which occurs in most families). I think BR, having been caught "playing doctor" on occasion, took a dominant position over his little (and in his mind, more favored) sister when he could, and at some point that night, JB ended up bashed into a coma. His parents covered it up, having lost JB and not wanting to lose BR as well (figuratively if not literally) went into overdrive, adrenaline-fueled mode that night. One action led to another to the point of no return. Had judge who sealed the phone records had a spine, I think THERE would be the beginning of the unravelling of this case. From those first, awful, early-morning moments of the 25/26th, one step led to another. Like a child telling a lie, when questioned, one lie begets another until the point of no return. Then, they CAN'T look back. Now the truth CAN'T be told, because all the lies that preceded it might rock Boulder all the way to the (then) Governor's office, if not higher (Lockeed?).

I almost agree with you totally on your overall scenario. I submit the boldtype word CAN'T in the last line of your post, might be instead: WON'T, respectfully, IMHO. Someone in either the BPD or the DA's Office who just might have a tortured sense of doing the right thing just once in his/her life, COULD step into a position of courageous bravery and help seek the resolve of justice this case deserves. Please read Kolar's book, page 422, 2nd paragraph. Even he feels there is hope! Yet, also feels great dismay at it ever being evitible.

[smart blonde]

Originally Posted by gypsychild

IMO it sounds like "Guess Who?" - one of my kids favorite games when they were little. Guess Who? - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I agree, gypsychild! This is the exact game I thought of when I read the opening post. It was my daughter's favorite game, too, when she was little, in the early to mid '90's.

[wonderllama]

I'm afraid I put this into the category of trying to connect everything to the crime when not everything is connected to the crime.

[Britt]

If I recall correctly, the "Guess Who" game has nothing to do with killing off characters, so the "not dead yet" comment makes no sense in the context of the game.

[LadyL]

Originally Posted by Britt

If I recall correctly, the "Guess Who" game has nothing to do with killing off characters, so the "not dead yet" comment makes no sense in the context of the game.

but it makes lots of sense when one considers how many 'off-hand' comments people make daily that have the word 'dead' in them

http://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/dead

and how those comments can infiltrate every aspect of our lives, including innocent game playing by children

[txsvicki]

It could possibly also be related to his knowing that his sister did'nt die right away and still thinking about it and relating it to a person being face down .

[wonderllama]

or not.....

I think we should be relying on actual evidence rather than speculating on how something might fit into a theory if used out of context.

[LinasK]

Originally Posted by wonderllama

or not.....

I think we should be relying on actual evidence rather than speculating on how something might fit into a theory if used out of context.

Yeah, I don't see the direct correlation like with Scott Peterson prophesying (sp?) his wife's death 3 weeks before he kills her. I think it's reaching...

[KoldKase]

I think--and it's just my opinion--this is why Kolar continues to refuse to "lay out" his own theory of what happened to JonBenet that night.

He's not "condemning" a child by any means. Kolar spends a fair amount of time discussing his own struggle with writing this book because of these unanswered questions and speculations.

[KoldKase]

Originally Posted by DeeDee249

I'll have more to say after I read the book, but I will say that as of this point, I do not believe BR is or was a sociopath. I think he did exhibit some "dissociative disorder" stereotypic behavior at the time, and he just seemed/looked like an odd kid. (MOO). I think there was a lot of disfunction in the family and likely some sibling rivalry (which occurs in most families). I think BR, having been caught "playing doctor" on occasion, took a dominant position over his little (and in his mind, more favored) sister when he could, and at some point that night, JB ended up bashed into a coma. His parents covered it up, having lost JB and not wanting to lose BR as well (figuratively if not literally) went into overdrive, adrenaline-fueled mode that night. One action led to another to the point of no return. Had judge who sealed the phone records had a spine, I think THERE would be the beginning of the unravelling of this case. From those first, awful, early-morning moments of the 25/26th, one step led to another. Like a child telling a lie, when questioned, one lie begets another until the point of no return. Then, they CAN'T look back. Now the truth CAN'T be told, because all the lies that preceded it might rock Boulder all the way to the (then) Governor's office, if not higher (Lockeed?).

I think this is very close to what happened to JonBenet in that family and on the night of her death.

I believe the evidence supports this.

And I believe Patsy and possibly John did the strangulation with the ligature and used the paintbrush on the child to cover up the prior vaginal intrusions.

I've felt for a very long time this was the reason so much about the evidence was confusing: multiple actors in the events of that night.

But it wasn't until I read the evidence Kolar reveals and how he puts it together that I can say I firmly fell on the side of Burke delivering the head blow. I also think it's likely he was sexually aggressive towards his sister and probably was the one who caused her prior vaginal injuries.

Possibly the only time they told the truth was when John and Patsy said they wouldn't cover for each other.

But they would each cover for Burke, IMO. With their level of position in their community, arrogance, sense of entitlement and privilege, I think they decided to "cut their losses," so to speak, and strangled JB to cover for Burke's abuse of his sister. Whether they knew she was alive but dying, I'll never know. Whatever they thought, I believe one or both carried her to the paint tray and did the deeds there.

And this is just my opinion.

[ciela]

Originally Posted by wonderllama

I'm afraid I put this into the category of trying to connect everything to the crime when not everything is connected to the crime.

Sorta like trying to devise a profile to fit your favorite POI.