Misty and family psych profile

I do agree with you debs, misty paints herself as the perpetual victim (but ironically finds her strength in ron)and wants to be made to feel better by somebody else. She is needy and wants to be taken care of. She is also vindictive and does not have boundaries. She is self-absorbed and wants attention and posesses no clue on how to make that happen w/o drama. She may see pregnancy as her only chance to have a person love her. She is not to be trusted or believed. She exists in a fantasy filled world and has resorted to sex and drugs to make her ideal life happen.

Whisperer said:

I am stunned that Lisa and Hank have been together and remained married for 25 yrs. This is highly unusual, considering what all the problems they allegedly have. I doubt they are severe as people are led to believe.

Hank had his own busines and it was Drywall, inc. I do not know how well it did but there had to be income at one time. They are drifters but so are the Cummings. The croslins may have moved to find work, where the cummings move to get away and restart in a different home.

Misty was most likely a problem child. We have not heard about it but it is there. I would like to know if Juvenile Hall was part of her upbringing...I would bet on it. Is is anyone's guess on what she did to do time, which I believe she had to do at some point. This girl has no boundaries and leaps on the best train coming by. She does not connect with people in a bonding way but appears to do well in a criminal sort of way. I do not see Tommy and Timmy in the same way. Tommy has seen his share of trouble since rc entered his life but it was pretty benign before. He apparently liked to smoke weed but had no trouble with the law till his sister married RC.

If you look at all the problems we have seen with the croslin family, it appears it all started happening in 09. They may have been poor and they may be alcoholics and possibly Hank got hooked on pain meds (he may have had some help) but they had not been arrested and done time for drugs or crime till 2009.

I would like to know if misty has ever cut herself. If so, that would allow me to label her a definite Borderline. She has all the other necessary characteristics. She posseses all the personality features for a narcissistic/antisocial personality to come along and manage her, as she is easy to control if you have something she is after.

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BBM, I've been thinking that Misty and Ron seem to complement each other in some dysfunctional way. He seeks power through intimidation and threats of violence, and his acquaintances more often than not end in altercations. Misty supports this by taking his side and seeming to look up to him, validating the tough-guy image he'd like to have. Meanwhile, Misty is able to use his hair-trigger temper to play the victim when he loses it and to pit him against other people, i.e. Tommy and CJ, fulfilling her own attention needs. They may do some nasty things to each other, fake pregnancies, cheat on each other, spew verbal abuse, get divorced, but I think they'll be together awhile, because together they create a lot of drama, which is what they thrive on. Or that's what I see, anyway. MOO.

Also, I've wondered what Hank and Lisa's drug histories are. Whisperer, you say they may be alcoholics, where did you hear that? I think at one time Misty described them as "crackheads," but of course her testimony is suspect. If they have had drug problems prior to this year, I wonder what her father's drug of choice was before pills. He owned a drywall business, so I wonder if he's someone who is willing and capable of working, but tends to lose it and spiral into addiction. That could result in frequent moves, living in cars, the family getting split up, etc.

Whisperer said:

I do agree with you debs, misty paints herself as the perpetual victim (but ironically finds her strength in ron)and wants to be made to feel better by somebody else. She is needy and wants to be taken care of. She is also vindictive and does not have boundaries. She is self-absorbed and wants attention and posesses no clue on how to make that happen w/o drama. She may see pregnancy as her only chance to have a person love her. She is not to be trusted or believed. She exists in a fantasy filled world and has resorted to sex and drugs to make her ideal life happen.

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BBM, but if you're referencing her claiming to be pregnant the weekend before Haleigh disappeared, if she had a pregnancy test that she'd taken from Chelsea, I wonder if there was something going on that made her need to try harder to get Ron's attention. If cousin Jo was in town and there was a fight about a gun before her bender, could she have been on the outs with him regarding that because she'd been busy pitting Jo and Ron against each other? And then to stir the pot more, she claimed to be pregnant, knowing that he would react with anger because he was already mad about something else? And then to add pepper to the pot, she takes off and has a fling with WBG, intentionally playing to Ron's temper and mutual need for drama so that their eventual making up would be more intense, which led to a final show-down on Monday, catching Haleigh in the cross-fire, and here we are? And now another layer is added to it because she is Ron's heroine, helping to cover their crime, and now they're bound for life? If she was pushing the threshold and he pushed back, something gave way and broke, and here we are, MOO.

Misty and ron are the perfect storm. He is a narcissist and she is the ideal personality for a "N". She is the invert of rc. If she had a good job or money, he wouldn't resist her, as rc is very attracted to money. He doesn't like to spend his own but LOVES to spend other people's.
MC likes the fact that he can buy her things. I am willing to bet she was in constant conflict about her feelings for Haleigh. On one hand, Haleigh could get rc to buy things for misty; OTOH, Haleigh was an obstacle for total control of rc and any money he had. I think she used Haleigh to her benefit but lost control and didn't like her when left alone with the tiny girl.

Whisperer said:

I am willing to bet she was in constant conflict about her feelings for Haleigh. On one hand, Haleigh could get rc to buy things for misty; OTOH, Haleigh was an obstacle for total control of rc and any money he had. I think she used Haleigh to her benefit but lost control and didn't like her when left alone with the tiny girl.

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Haleigh and Jr were also a constant reminder that Ron had a long relationship before her. A visual reminder that he loved Crystal enough to make babies with her.

Misty is the supreme master at pitting people against each other. This is what makes her Borderline, imo. I am still wondering is she cuts....she SO seems like she would.

She is addicted to drama. Hard to figure out why she is not pregnant by now. She doesn' t do well with confrontation and her true self will appear if she is confronted and it won't be pretty.

We don't know if the family ever lived in cars...this could be more of misty's delusions. It is possible that they could have spent a night or two in a vehicle but misty likes to play up her self as a victimized person and it is not her fault...it is her lousy parent's fault.

We don't know if they were drug addicts or not. We now know Hank has a problem. How this occured or for how long, we don't know. What I do know is Misty marrying ronald cummings appears to have deeply affected everyone of the Croslins. Tommy feels he needs protection (wonder if he is worried about his kids being harmed). Hank sr. is killing himself and his worries with drugs. The interesting one I would like to hear from is Timmy, who has left the area and is not standing by the family BUT is also not talking.

I think the alcohol addiction goes for both families though and is not just restricted to the Croslins. The croslins remain together despite all the problems....go figure.

Lisa is an interesting mother. Her children were raised in what can reasonably be considered a chaotic home, yet she maintains a marriage for over 25 years (the only couple in all the players whose marriage has sustained for this length of time). She protects her child by filing charges against a boy for assaulting Misty, then signs the papers to emancipate her daughter in order for Misty to make legitimate the relationship she is having with an adult male who should have by law been arrested for sexual assault of Misty. She states she loves her daughter, then calls her a liar. She goes along for the ride to help her daughter leave Ron, and then appears in court with her son as support for him when Misty files for a restraining order against him.

Lisa exhausts me in all the flip-flopping she does.

Whisperer said:

Misty is the supreme master at pitting people against each other. This is what makes her Borderline, imo. I am still wondering is she cuts....she SO seems like she would.

She is addicted to drama. Hard to figure out why she is not pregnant by now. She doesn' t do well with confrontation and her true self will appear if she is confronted and it won't be pretty.

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Not that it matters but ITA with you re: Misty and borderline.

debs said:

Lisa is an interesting mother. Her children were raised in what can reasonably be considered a chaotic home, yet she maintains a marriage for over 25 years (the only couple in all the players whose marriage has sustained for this length of time). She protects her child by filing charges against a boy for assaulting Misty, then signs the papers to emancipate her daughter in order for Misty to make legitimate the relationship she is having with an adult male who should have by law been arrested for sexual assault of Misty. She states she loves her daughter, then calls her a liar. She goes along for the ride to help her daughter leave Ron, and then appears in court with her son as support for him when Misty files for a restraining order against him.

Lisa exhausts me in all the flip-flopping she does.

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Borderline mother with substance abuse issues (conflicting message to and about her daughter) in a completely codependent enmeshed marriage. My mother stayed married to her husband (not my father) for over 20 years before she died. George and Cindy have stayed together for decades. I wouldn't consider the length of the relationship to be reflective of the health of the marriage.

debs said:

Hank Sr is a creepy father. I got nuthin after that.

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I get what ya mean re: Hank sr.

Misty's comment "That's just the way my family is" to either the hypnotist or the lie detector dude stuck with me because mine was quite like that too (obviously not the same but I "got" what she meant and felt bad for her in a way). Having that in the back of my head combined with the transparency of their known history and current behaviors (drugs, no solid home for children to grow up in, not making under-aged children attend school, mother and son breaking laws together, mother claiming to love and trust her daughter then after there is a family fight mother going on TV saying she thinks her daughter is hiding something, "stand by your man" mentality, etc etc) here's my:twocents:

I think Lisa's loyalty lies with Hank and not with her children. She, to me, is the type of mother who sides with her husband regardless of what happens or who is at fault. She sees their relationship as "her life" and if the child is gonna be causing trouble in her life she'd have no problem kicking them (the "offending child") out because of fighting between father and child/ren... regardless of if the child is too young to even live outside the home (little doubt IMO this is why Misty was out of the home so young). I think Lisa feels like she "needs" him and she is willing to lose even her children to keep him happy. I think Hank says "jump" and Lisa says "how high?" Though I suspect she's probably just always already jumping. IOW, she's "well trained".

When Tommy was arrested at the house- they all refused to press charges. Hank says the guys were "wrestling", Tommy says he threw his dad dvd's and his dad hit him. Lisa says Tommy threw DVD's AT Hank and then he hit his father. Tommy was pi$$ed- http://www.***********.net/indepth/Haleigh/tommy.pdf (I hope that's OK to link, I just searched the report and gave the first link that had the whole thing)
"Tommy refused to write a written statement. Tommy kept a hostile posture throughout the investigation and was extremly uncooperative. Tommy continued to try instigating verbal altercations with his father, Hank, and his mother, Lisa Carmen Croslin..

~Snip~

***** stated that she did not want her father to stay at the house because Tommy will start the fighting again. stated that Tommy jumped on Hank and started hitting him.~ refused to provide a statement or
provide any additional information...
~snip~ Tommy did not leave and was still instigating verbal altercations with Hank and Lisa and was becoming combative."

As mad as he was? IMO Nobody was pressing charges because they had all already probably threatened one another while LE was in route that "I'll tell them what I know about you and then you'll have charges on you if you press 'em on me." This is not a loving family, it's a family that is holding one another hostage, IMO. I think Misty will end up much like her mom, I think she is already much like her mom. There is a song like that, "stand by your man" or something like that?

jmo

OLG, I have to agree. Lisa was no doubt once very beautiful, but her lifestyle has been hard on her. I'm not criticizing her looks; I'm stating that her life is worn her down. She is everything to everyone, regardless of the conflicts it causes.

In the incident with Ronald and Misty, when Tommy, Lisa, and Hank drove up to "rescue her" (per their statements).......I easily see that. But I also easily see the set-up. That Misty called for rescue, and then she "stood by HER man." Misty has always been a throwaway child for them. Repeatedly in her life-story, she is away from her family.

I do not think they were there on Lisa's insistence. She is more of a "you made your bed, lie in it" type of parent. She was nearly as giddy as Misty for signing the emancipation papers. One wonders why she even showed up that night.

I believe Hank Sr only went along because he views his family as property anyway. I think the instigator for going that night was Tommy, that the call came to Tommy to help her (Misty) and that Hank decided to go along (for reasons of hatred toward Ron, not for fear of his child) and Lisa tagged along with her husband (not out of concern for her children).

Tommy, who has the 'hero' role in family dynamics (not meaning he has any superpowers, just that he will be the one to try to fix things, however it can be that he fixes them [usually with his fists]) and he will fight whoever he needs to fight to do what he needs to do to keep his family dynamic in place.

The Damsel (Misty) calls, the Hero responds, the Jester/Antagonizer (Hank) goes along, and the peace keeper (Lisa) rides shotgun.

The center of the chaos (Misty) then pulls back, and disrupts the family dynamic enough that a fight ensues, and she sits back and gloats over what she's created: In her mind, everyone she cares about is fighting over HER! and it's wonderful. Misty learned how to control the chaos to a master's fine technique, and she has been spreading that knowledge since.

Whether she and Ronald were fighting that night is a moot point; it is quite clear (to me) she made her family believe that was what was going on, and she took full advantage of it to prove her love to her man (much like Lisa does over and again) by filling out that paperwork on her brother.

Five days later, she tries to file papers on her mother. This would be AFTER her mother was on TV telling the world she thinks her daughter isn't telling the truth and that she believes her son.

This family could keep a general psych class in notes on the family dynamics for an entire semester.

debs said:

OLG, I have to agree. Lisa was no doubt once very beautiful, but her lifestyle has been hard on her. I'm not criticizing her looks; I'm stating that her life is worn her down. She is everything to everyone, regardless of the conflicts it causes.

In the incident with Ronald and Misty, when Tommy, Lisa, and Hank drove up to "rescue her" (per their statements).......I easily see that. But I also easily see the set-up. That Misty called for rescue, and then she "stood by HER man." Misty has always been a throwaway child for them. Repeatedly in her life-story, she is away from her family.

I do not think they were there on Lisa's insistence. She is more of a "you made your bed, lie in it" type of parent. She was nearly as giddy as Misty for signing the emancipation papers. One wonders why she even showed up that night.

I believe Hank Sr only went along because he views his family as property anyway. I think the instigator for going that night was Tommy, that the call came to Tommy to help her (Misty) and that Hank decided to go along (for reasons of hatred toward Ron, not for fear of his child) and Lisa tagged along with her husband (not out of concern for her children).

Tommy, who has the 'hero' role in family dynamics (not meaning he has any superpowers, just that he will be the one to try to fix things, however it can be that he fixes them [usually with his fists]) and he will fight whoever he needs to fight to do what he needs to do to keep his family dynamic in place.

The Damsel (Misty) calls, the Hero responds, the Jester/Antagonizer (Hank) goes along, and the peace keeper (Lisa) rides shotgun.

The center of the chaos (Misty) then pulls back, and disrupts the family dynamic enough that a fight ensues, and she sits back and gloats over what she's created: In her mind, everyone she cares about is fighting over HER! and it's wonderful. Misty learned how to control the chaos to a master's fine technique, and she has been spreading that knowledge since.

Whether she and Ronald were fighting that night is a moot point; it is quite clear (to me) she made her family believe that was what was going on, and she took full advantage of it to prove her love to her man (much like Lisa does over and again) by filling out that paperwork on her brother.

Five days later, she tries to file papers on her mother. This would be AFTER her mother was on TV telling the world she thinks her daughter isn't telling the truth and that she believes her son.

This family could keep a general psych class in notes on the family dynamics for an entire semester.

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Wow, just wow!!! You are good!!! I think you nailed Misty to a *T*, imo.

I'd love to see you write about what you get from Ron.

RC will retaliate legally or physically to anyone that he perceives is out to get him. If you criicicze him, his ears perk up...and he now uses misty as his 'snake in the grass' or "go to woman' to help him resolve the problem. They are thick as thieves, these two.

misty has now gained an identity, she is rc's girl and hero. She lost the 'wife' part but I don't think she considers the divorce paper a final act in their association. She is delusional in many respects. She is also dangerous.

Whisperer said:

RC will retaliate legally or physically to anyone that he perceives is out to get him. If you criicicze him, his ears perk up...and he now uses misty as his 'snake in the grass' or "go to woman' to help him resolve the problem. They are thick as thieves, these two.

misty has now gained an identity, she is rc's girl and hero. She lost the 'wife' part but I don't think she considers the divorce paper a final act in their association. She is delusional in many respects. She is also dangerous.

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Your first paragraph is astoundingly on target, imo, whisperer. That is what is so frightening about Ron and his family, at least to me.

The profiles by OLG & debs, ehhh, not so much, but I'm certainly no authority on family dynamics and def not well-versed in reading people's psychological make-up. [long way of saying IHNI]

Whisperer said:

RC will retaliate legally or physically to anyone that he perceives is out to get him. If you criicicze him, his ears perk up...and he now uses misty as his 'snake in the grass' or "go to woman' to help him resolve the problem. They are thick as thieves, these two.

misty has now gained an identity, she is rc's girl and hero. She lost the 'wife' part but I don't think she considers the divorce paper a final act in their association. She is delusional in many respects. She is also dangerous.

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BBM.. IMHO She isn't the ONLY woman he has used to resolve his problems...JMO

ladonna said:

Wow, just wow!!! You are good!!! I think you nailed Misty to a *T*, imo.

I'd love to see you write about what you get from Ron.

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It was made clear that we weren't to even bother with that, Ladonna.

Probably because of threats of lawsuits...

debs said:

OLG, I have to agree. Lisa was no doubt once very beautiful, but her lifestyle has been hard on her. I'm not criticizing her looks; I'm stating that her life is worn her down. She is everything to everyone, regardless of the conflicts it causes.

In the incident with Ronald and Misty, when Tommy, Lisa, and Hank drove up to "rescue her" (per their statements).......I easily see that. But I also easily see the set-up. That Misty called for rescue, and then she "stood by HER man." Misty has always been a throwaway child for them. Repeatedly in her life-story, she is away from her family.

I do not think they were there on Lisa's insistence. She is more of a "you made your bed, lie in it" type of parent. She was nearly as giddy as Misty for signing the emancipation papers. One wonders why she even showed up that night.

I believe Hank Sr only went along because he views his family as property anyway. I think the instigator for going that night was Tommy, that the call came to Tommy to help her (Misty) and that Hank decided to go along (for reasons of hatred toward Ron, not for fear of his child) and Lisa tagged along with her husband (not out of concern for her children).

Tommy, who has the 'hero' role in family dynamics (not meaning he has any superpowers, just that he will be the one to try to fix things, however it can be that he fixes them [usually with his fists]) and he will fight whoever he needs to fight to do what he needs to do to keep his family dynamic in place.

The Damsel (Misty) calls, the Hero responds, the Jester/Antagonizer (Hank) goes along, and the peace keeper (Lisa) rides shotgun.

The center of the chaos (Misty) then pulls back, and disrupts the family dynamic enough that a fight ensues, and she sits back and gloats over what she's created: In her mind, everyone she cares about is fighting over HER! and it's wonderful. Misty learned how to control the chaos to a master's fine technique, and she has been spreading that knowledge since. Whether she and Ronald were fighting that night is a moot point; it is quite clear (to me) she made her family believe that was what was going on, and she took full advantage of it to prove her love to her man (much like Lisa does over and again) by filling out that paperwork on her brother.

Five days later, she tries to file papers on her mother. This would be AFTER her mother was on TV telling the world she thinks her daughter isn't telling the truth and that she believes her son.

This family could keep a general psych class in notes on the family dynamics for an entire semester.

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You really nailed it in the bolded part. I believe that Misty has found a way to wield control over a family that she feels failed her. She is enjoying the payback.

I was curious on why Hank Sr. will not get involved and make any statements to LE. He is either a wuz or is scared to cross misty. I think they all appear afraid of her or thinks she's so crazy, they better keep their mouths shut.