Do you enjoy going to the bathroom? Charmin wants YOU! NO JOKE!

I hereby nominate Jose Baez. After all, he's already trying to sell us an enormous load of cr@p, why not sell the paper to go along with it?
 
I would be more than HAPPY to be a Charmin ambassador! I'll call them on the phone right now. Do they take cute little 61-year-old mother's and teachers?

I've gone to the bathroom or "taken them to bathroom" in every possible nightmarish situation or "pleasant" situation possible. I've cleaned up every possible, indelicate mess with, yess CHARMIN!!! You betcha - Charmin is the softest but also the STRONGEST! It doesn't just evaporate so the goo gets all over those fingers. It doesn't tear and tear and tear, before you can even get ONE LITTLE SQUARE off the danged tp roll.

$10,000 dollars. I ABSOLUTELY LOVE CHARMIN!!! YOU"RE THE BEST, CHARMIN!!! TRULY, I KNOW I'm MUCH more convincing than SALLY FIELD selling BonivA!!!!! THan Bob Dole talking about ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION. (wasn't he a cutie pie?) I Listened to you Bob Dole, I really, REALLY did!

But they actually want you to spend the money to fly up there and THEN tell you why you're the best and show them your resume?

Sorry, Charmin, I can't really afford or have the time to apply. Is this a joke?

Dang, I have a really cute little butt too, I think I might HAVE A CHANCE AT it!!

Does it sound OK if I say I enjoy the restroom if my husband and son remember to put the lid down and I DON"T FALL IN?????

PLEASE, guys, give me feedback on this. Shall I post I photo of my "attributes"???

Hilarious; thanks for brightening my day, Charmin and My Meow!

(hey, that might sound good too!! Feedback please)

I don't want to be like Carrie Prejean and BLOW my answers....

Oops, did I say BLOW, hmmm. RUN! GO for it, ladies. Don't HOLD BACK.

J Bean J Bean, where are ya gal!!! This is a funny topic.

:Banane45:
 
See, I should win this job hands down but trouble is if I audition I have to bring with me so many props to show why I LOVE going to the bathroom.

Hey . . .Whaddya thinking here. :shocked2: :shocked2:

Here is why I enjoy going to the bathroom.

3 dogs. 2 large 1 little annoying kind. All want my attention NOW

11 finches. Constant drama in their cage. It wears me out watching them

1 snake. He's cool.

And finally;

One 13 year old boy whose goal in life is to annoy me until I drop stone cold dead from annoyance. That's what it would read on my Death Certificate.

"Death Due To Extremely Annoying Behavior of Teenager."

So, for me to audition I would have to show why I like going into the bathroom, locking the door, and just breathing. I would need to bring the animals and annoying teenager to show why I have peace and solitude in that little square room.

That is until 17 seconds after I lock the door my Treeing Walker Coon Hound throws her body against the door, pops the lock open, and all dogs proceed to come in and beg, whine, and then turn on each other. All of this happens in an area about the size of small stove. Gets a bit crowded when the weiner dog is attacking the treeing coon hound for biting the lab's back leg and chewing on it acting like it's rawhide.

17 seconds of peace. I LOVE GOING TO THE BATHROOM.

I don't think my dream of becoming a Charmin rep in NYC is going to happen. I must learn to deal with the disappointment.
 
I hold your "props" Tricia if you'll hold mine.

Maybe it could be a team type situation.

Maybe then I could could consider the flight to New York, but I know if I "scream" too much on the plane I might get kicked off.

And speaking of Airplane bathrooms - I DO NOT use them, no matter how dire the need.

So not only do I PROMOTE good toilet paper, I help CONSERVE IT as well!

( I doubt that Charmin will want an environmentalist tho; shucks that will disqualify me for sure)

ANOTHER use of Charmin is when your teenagers paper your neighbor's trees, or a friend's trees.

Then they are no longer your friends. But that's another good use for Charmin!!!
 
OMG, you guys have me in stitches!!!!!!!! :laugh::applause::rolling:


Tricia, my 14 lb dachshund does the same thing, and if I do not close the door all the way, he finds his way in. Obsessive little dog, he would be attached to me with velcro if he could!

I think my husband would win. He has set his bathroom (yes he has his own, I would not touch it except to put in gloves and clothespins to clean it) as his home office. He has a magazine rack, makes his business calls from there, etc.

Too funny!!!!!!!!!!
 
OMG!!! That's unbelievable. (ejector man)

Well, I've been laughing alot at this, but I think I need to go get some things done.

One advantage of older age is WISDOM, and I've learned that I don't usually win contests.
 
This summer, when I kept the back door open, my geese would come in the house and follow me everywhere, including the bathroom. I had to let them in or they'd honk and wake up the baby. They discovered that toilet paper on a roll is VERY enjoyably chewed, shredded, and eaten. Did they say only humans could apply?
 
OMG, you guys have me in stitches!!!!!!!! :laugh::applause::rolling:


Tricia, my 14 lb dachshund does the same thing, and if I do not close the door all the way, he finds his way in. Obsessive little dog, he would be attached to me with velcro if he could!

I think my husband would win. He has set his bathroom (yes he has his own, I would not touch it except to put in gloves and clothespins to clean it) as his home office. He has a magazine rack, makes his business calls from there, etc.

Too funny!!!!!!!!!!

It's best ALWAYS to have separate bathrooms. The one thing I hate about going on vacation is SHARING A BATHROOM WITH (ta da!! THE BATHROOM HOGGER)

I mean, what am I supposed to do when I need to go? Use the trashcan and keep Charmin by the bed????? so usually I RUN in and use it before he even gets up the morning.

I'm sure my husband could win a prize for sure, cause he's very ANAL about what kind TP we use.

Oh, yes. Well, now my "chuckles" are starting to turn into "nightmares" (using the trashcan at Yosemite), and resentments.

Please don't bring back these bad memories. I'd better go check now to make sure I have enough Charmin in every separate bathroom. Would Charmin like to hear about my MENTAL BREAKDOWN, if I go to the bathroom and NOBODY REPLACED THE PAPER?

In these cases, I am quite resourceful and have learned to fish USED KLEENEX out of the trashcan. Or other soft items. No, Charmin, I don't believe you would choose me, even though I love you.

Bye now!
 
This summer, when I kept the back door open, my geese would come in the house and follow me everywhere, including the bathroom. I had to let them in or they'd honk and wake up the baby. They discovered that toilet paper on a roll is VERY enjoyably chewed, shredded, and eaten. Did they say only humans could apply?

Your goose??? That's hilarious, PeteyGirl.

"You had to let them in or they'd honk and wake the baby." :)

Been there, done that long ago, but I've never had a Goose, just cats, dogs or gerbils.

Of course now I remember our first dog, a Basset Hound, when we both worked all day - we left him in the house and the toilet paper was from one end of the house to the other.

Of course now I remember my toddler daughter did exactly the same thing as the dog.

THERE'S MUCH MORE TO TOILET PAPER THAN MEETS THE ....err....eye!

I think we could all win the contest!
 
I think Charmin should just do a commercial on all the ways that toilet paper is used. Dogs chew it up (and geese!), kids pulll it all over the house, teenagers use it to TP houses! Heck, this halloween my son had a halloween party and they used the TP to make mummies out of the kids for a game!
 
I think Charmin should just do a commercial on all the ways that toilet paper is used. Dogs chew it up (and geese!), kids pulll it all over the house, teenagers use it to TP houses! Heck, this halloween my son had a halloween party and they used the TP to make mummies out of the kids for a game!
 
My cat likes to unroll then shred the TP now and again, and has been known to put her claws in the rolls still in the package. I could switch to Charmin to see how well it withstands cat attacks. BTW, my teen boy won't come anywhere near the bathroom when I'm in there, I leave the door open. Only took once.
 
OMG....my son would love to be an ambassador. We use Charmin Plus with Aloe and E. I actually bring it on vacation because we are so spoiled. My son spends tons of time in the bathroom.
 
I have a recurring dream, actually it's a nightmare, that I am sitting on the "T" in a very public place naked as a Jaybird! But, Hey throw a royal red robe around me, hand me a staff, crown my head in jewels and sit me down in Times Square. I'm sure I can look like an Ambassador to something!
 
WOW! Having actually worked for a "toilet paper" distributor myself, and coming from a family in the advertising industry, I'm scratching my head on this one. Why on earth would Proctor and Gamble want to have someone blog "bathroom experiences" in New York?

Have they not seen the thread in the Bizzare and off beat news thread about the guy that was found covered in Plastic Wrap sitting at the bottom of a porta potty. I think he'd win the job and they could save the 10 grand!

Are they not selling enough Dial soap? or are they thinking along the lines of copying the Balloon Boy, Octomom, the Anthony's? McDonalds crossed my mind as a co-advertiser, but I don't want to go there.

I guess the Leo Burnett's of the world have lost out on new young and upcoming ad exec's.

If Charmin would like my honest opinion, I'd pass... too linty.

I'm still trying to wrap my head around WHY Proctor and Gamble would like to blog bathroom experiences in New York?

ETA: I think this thread needs to be moved to the bizzare and offbeat news thread... jmo of course.
 

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