What's a woman to do on the trail when she runs into a hiker who shows off a little more of his "equipment" than she's interested in checking out?
A longtime on-again, off-again resident of the Roaring Fork Valley faced just such a conundrum earlier this month when a buck-naked man popped out from behind a tree on the trail up Conundrum Creek.
Sasha's tale began at about 10 a.m. on a Sunday. She parked and set out what she hoped would be a daylong sojourn to Conundrum Hot Springs. About 20 minutes into the hike she encountered a man, fully clothed, in his late 30s or early-40s hiking out.
"He appeared fit and well-equipped - no pun intended," she said, referring to the fact that it appeared he had a large pack full of camping gear with him. She also recalled that the man had blond hair, glasses and was about 5 feet, 10 inches tall. They spoke briefly and then parted ways. Sasha, who asked that her last name not be used, began to forget about him.
Around three-and-a-half hours into the hike, the skies darkened and Sasha decided to call it a day, despite the fact she hadn't reached her destination. She sat down, ate lunch, smoked a big ol' fatty, and then began walking back to her car. Raindrops began to fall, so she pulled out her umbrella.
About two miles from the parking lot, she was passing a couple headed up the trail when the towheaded hiker whom she had met in the morning reappeared.
"At the same time I was greeting them, this guy pops out from behind a tree, naked except for the backpack," Sasha recalled. "We all looked. He was, like, 10 feet away and walking toward us in a jovial manner."
He was indeed fit, tan from head to toe, but not especially well-equipped. Nor was he aroused. "It was just sort of perched there," she said.
After the man made a lame attempt at a joke about the rain and his nakedness, everyone scattered - the couple up the trail and Sasha down the trail.