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  #1  
Old 10-31-2007, 03:06 PM
Nocgirl Nocgirl is offline
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mother arrested after leaving 17 month old to die in hot car

22 year mother hooters waitress, apparantly "forgot" to drop the child off in daycare. Friends and family say that the young mother was overwhelmed with being a mom and that her child was not a priority so they arrested her. It has not mentioned who or where the father of the tot is.

http://www.azcentral.com/community/p...1baby1031.html
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  #2  
Old 10-31-2007, 03:12 PM
Amraann Amraann is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nocgirl View Post
22 year mother hooters waitress, apparantly "forgot" to drop the child off in daycare. Friends and family say that the young mother was overwhelmed with being a mom and that her child was not a priority so they arrested her. It has not mentioned who or where the father of the tot is.

http://www.azcentral.com/community/p...1baby1031.html

Lets all note how the business man who had the alarm on his car did not go to jail even though he kept turning the alarm off while his child died.
I guess his child WAS his priority???
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  #3  
Old 10-31-2007, 03:14 PM
ckwood32 ckwood32 is offline
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Sorry if she was overwhelmed with being a Mom! Who isn't? So sad her child wasn't a priority. That sweet baby. I really hope this was an accident. Friends and family saying she wanted her freedom?
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  #4  
Old 10-31-2007, 03:22 PM
SadieMae SadieMae is offline
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She apparently had no interest or time to be a mother. At 22, she knew there were things she could have done NOT to get pregnant or options available if she didn't want to keep her baby.
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  #5  
Old 10-31-2007, 03:28 PM
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This child didn't die which could be the difference, but still...it does point out how much it varies upon prosecution of such an offense.

Tulsa County prosecutors say they will not charge a woman who left her one-month-old son in a hot car earlier this year. The child was left in a locked car outside an Owasso business with the window rolled up in August. Temperatures at the time were 104 degrees.

http://kotv.com/news/local/story/?id=138606
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  #6  
Old 10-31-2007, 03:28 PM
AmandaBrown23 AmandaBrown23 is offline
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They always "forgot". Yeah right. Poor little baby.
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  #7  
Old 10-31-2007, 03:43 PM
pjop pjop is offline
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I have 3 children. They are older now but I can tell you I never once "forgot" they were in their car seats in the back of the car! I'll never understand this....not ever!
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  #8  
Old 10-31-2007, 03:51 PM
comfort80 comfort80 is offline
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my son is 21 months old, and believe me, if i left the car without him @ 17 months old, the world would know it- its not like a 3 month old who sleeps most of the time and is quiet in the car... sometimes my son is so loud, jabbering away to himself, i have to turn the radio up loud just to hear the traffic report at 7 in the morning...
I know its not the daycare or caregivers responsibility, but both places ive taken my kids, would call me if they weren't there when they were supposed to be...
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  #9  
Old 10-31-2007, 03:55 PM
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I have 3 children. They are older now but I can tell you I never once "forgot" they were in their car seats in the back of the car! I'll never understand this....not ever!
I totally agree! If they were communicating with their children instead of talking on their cellphones, listening to their music, or otherwise being so self-absorbed...they would KNOW their children were there!!
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  #10  
Old 10-31-2007, 04:11 PM
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Originally Posted by Amraann View Post
Lets all note how the business man who had the alarm on his car did not go to jail even though he kept turning the alarm off while his child died.
I guess his child WAS his priority???
There seems to be a huge disparity in the ways these types of cases are handled - with people on the lower end of the socio-economic system bearing the harshest punishments.

My prayers for this overwhelmed young mother.
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  #11  
Old 10-31-2007, 04:27 PM
SadieMae SadieMae is offline
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Originally Posted by southcitymom View Post
There seems to be a huge disparity in the ways these types of cases are handled - with people on the lower end of the socio-economic system bearing the harshest punishments.

My prayers for this overwhelmed young mother.
I have noticed in some of the threads about it here also. It seems to be more "accidental" when the parent/s are middle/upper class, than if a poor single mom does it. I can understand where the mother has NO daycare and takes the baby to work, it's no way accidental the child was left in the car.
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  #12  
Old 10-31-2007, 04:36 PM
CarpeDiem CarpeDiem is offline
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I have 3 children. They are older now but I can tell you I never once "forgot" they were in their car seats in the back of the car! I'll never understand this....not ever!
Me either! And, to go all that time, in this case 7 hours, and she never thought about her child, never thought to take 30 seconds on her break and check-in with the sitter? I don't understand as a parent how you go all day with such a young child and never think about them, which might then remind you, child is in car!!
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  #13  
Old 10-31-2007, 04:37 PM
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Originally Posted by SadieMae View Post
I have noticed in some of the threads about it here also. It seems to be more "accidental" when the parent/s are middle/upper class, than if a poor single mom does it. I can understand where the mother has NO daycare and takes the baby to work, it's no way accidental the child was left in the car.
I agree SadieMae, the doctor was not charged but why is this girl who works at Hooters being charged. I am sure the doc got a lawyer right away though... I do not understand how someone can forget their baby but I don't condone her being charged when other people have not been.
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  #14  
Old 10-31-2007, 05:08 PM
Nocgirl Nocgirl is offline
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This girl is being charged because it is very obvious from what her friends and family are saying, its possible this was not an "accident".

NO mother that loves her child passionately, and has bonded with the child, forgets about them for 7 hours. I think about my 3 year old 24/7 and when she is not with me, I think of her every few minutes.

Some mothers are charged, some are not and it all depends on each circumstance. I am thinking this mother thought the child was a burden, interfered with the dating and love life, etc..
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  #15  
Old 10-31-2007, 05:39 PM
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I think it's an accident. Whatever she said, however much she may have had mixed feelings about being a mother - her car was parked where people were walking by it - police theorize the tinted windows made the child hard to see - but if she wanted him dead, she would have parked someplace more isolated.


Definite "class" tones to this report though - they have to specify she was a waitress at "Hooters" - which has a tone of - "one step up from a pole-dancer or prostitute".
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  #16  
Old 10-31-2007, 06:15 PM
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iNTERESTEDWOMAN iNTERESTEDWOMAN is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CarpeDiem View Post
Me either! And, to go all that time, in this case 7 hours, and she never thought about her child, never thought to take 30 seconds on her break and check-in with the sitter? I don't understand as a parent how you go all day with such a young child and never think about them, which might then remind you, child is in car!!
She was a Hooters Waitress, I can guarantee you were her mind was...and probably other body parts.

(Yes, I know I'm stereotyping, but she could get paid just as well at Red Lobster or a nice streak house, she just rather have men gawking at her and be the center of attention) I bet she spent more time on her hair that day, than her child.
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  #17  
Old 10-31-2007, 06:25 PM
Littledeer Littledeer is offline
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This case so reminds me of what happened here in Ohio recently. I am going to have to paraphrase the circumstances.....

The mother was an Assistant Principal (?) or Principal of a School, and she had her child in her SUV in the moring and stopped to buy doughnuts for a school meeting. She then when to the school and had her meeting, etc. She did NOT realize that she had forgotten to drop off her child at the daycare until the police came to the school to tell her the child was dead and took her into custody.

Live videos show she was extremely distraught............she was not charged.

I also thought, how can a Mother FORGET that their child is in the vehicle??? But after listening to this mother and seeing how distraught she was over the fact she HAD CAUSED THE DEATH of her child, I think I can give a little leeway and say, okay...........hard for me to accept, but it can happen to the best of us.

However, in this case it appears that it is "alleged" that she forgot. Totally different circumstances.

I agree that at 22 years old, you are still a child yourself. So it was probably a case of forgetting and not a case of intentional muirder.

Either way, in both cases a child died from forgetfulness.
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  #18  
Old 10-31-2007, 06:31 PM
Littledeer Littledeer is offline
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Interested:

You were stereotyping unfortunately. I used to work at Hooters and Max Doogan's but now working for the State. And in none of those jobs were the kids LESS IMPORTANT than me. They were my number ONE priority.

I know, it's hard not to stereotype......... I've caught myself doing it at times!!
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  #19  
Old 10-31-2007, 09:33 PM
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Maybe there needs to be legislation at the federal level, so that these cases are treated more evenly?

I just don't get it. At one point, I had THREE kids age 2 and under, one of them medical needs who required various therapies and treatments (my twins were born when my oldest was 26 months old.) I don't think anyone could have been more overwhelmed than I was at the time! I never "forgot" my kids anywhere. How do you forget a human being?
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  #20  
Old 10-31-2007, 09:37 PM
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OK, I just went to read the actual article. I'm having a hard time believing this was an accident.

Quote:
Just a day before Ryan's death, his father, Clayton Gallagher, had volunteered to take full custody of his son, according to court documents. He had spoken on the phone with Duchene for 1½ hours. She told him she “couldn't do it anymore” and she didn't want Ryan around because he cried so much. But she also couldn't stand not seeing him everyday and rebuffed his offer to take him.
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  #21  
Old 10-31-2007, 09:41 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hipmamajen View Post
OK, I just went to read the actual article. I'm having a hard time believing this was an accident.

Yeah, that's not good.
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  #22  
Old 10-31-2007, 09:49 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hipmamajen View Post
OK, I just went to read the actual article. I'm having a hard time believing this was an accident.
Not me - the article portrays a confused young mother who is struggling with the dificulties of raising a young child, but loves him and can't stand the thought of not seeing him every day.
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  #23  
Old 10-31-2007, 09:51 PM
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Or a mom who's sick of dealing with him, but doesn't want anyone else to have him, either.
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  #24  
Old 11-01-2007, 12:22 AM
philamena philamena is offline
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Originally Posted by SeriouslySearching View Post
This child didn't die which could be the difference, but still...it does point out how much it varies upon prosecution of such an offense.

Tulsa County prosecutors say they will not charge a woman who left her one-month-old son in a hot car earlier this year. The child was left in a locked car outside an Owasso business with the window rolled up in August. Temperatures at the time were 104 degrees.

http://kotv.com/news/local/story/?id=138606
Seriously,
The baby this article discusses did die.
Quote:
hours before dying in her car, Ashly Duchene's 17-month-old son smiled at her as she looked at him through her rearview mirror.

But for some reason, when Duchene, 22, arrived at work Tuesday morning, she forgot about Ryan's happy face and left him in her Honda Civic for seven hours while she waited tables at Hooters. She now faces charges of neglient homicide.
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  #25  
Old 11-01-2007, 05:43 AM
aussie_mum aussie_mum is offline
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Well I can admit to not being the perfect mother. I am a single parent to 3 children ages 3,4 and 9. The childcare centre the 2 youngest attend is slap bang in the middle of our house and where I work. About 2 weeks ago I was 3/4 of the way to work when my son piped up from the back seat "Where are we going mum?".... oopps.... turned around and took them to childcare. It scared me! Because they could have so easily not said anything. And when I got to work I could have been out of the car in 2 seconds flat without it even occuring to me that I had left them in the car. Yes my mind was on other things, and as much as it sucks I can easily see how this could happen. It's not that I don't think about them, because I constantly do, but we often do things in a routine, without thinking, so sometimes when we miss a step we don't even realise.

I will also put my hand up to leaving the iron on, leaving the oven on, leaving a bath tap running, leaving the front door wide open, forgetting to feed my kids breakfast and a whole list of other things. Because when we do these things we often have a routine we adhere to, so if we do one thing different, we may miss a step.
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