Found Deceased PA - Paul Kochu, 22, Allegheny County, 17 Dec 2014 - #2

[Ski1987]

I was able to confirm on The Find Paul Facebook page that Paul bats and throws right-handed. However, in watching the video, I can't really tell which hand is injured. The video is so far away that I can tell which hand is holding the other.

 

[Treelights]

My goodness, what a lively thread! I can see everyone cares deeply about this accomplished missing young man.
I tend to favor Det. Klimpt's theory. I see a bunch of liquored up young guys all ripping up the town. Maybe something happened or was revealed in beer talk that embarrassed our missing subject. Perhaps under normal circumstances he could have dealt with this head on,and effectively. But, perhaps he is one of these folks who "can't hold their liquor" and becomes psychologically fragile when they are inebriated. Sounds like it.

Similar to Det. Klimpt, I *theorize* based on what I have read, that something was indeed done or said to horribly upset/embarass Paul. (And I agree that the roomies aren't giving that info up, or maybe just to LE). I think Paul was so drunk that he completely lost all judgement and committed self harm. I have seen young men act in such a manner inebriated, but usually it's over a girl. If I had to guess, this had to do with something embarrassing related to something relationship oriented, but that's just guessing on my part. There's only so many things that upset a young man that much, and many times it's a relationship.

But in the end, I think a very distraught, and very drunk young man stumbled along outside and ended up falling in, or jumping in the water. That's the best I can deduce from what I know of this case. I think the roomies may be holding back specific conversational details to protect Paul's privacy, vs. protect themselves. I don't think they are guilty of harming him physically. Emotionally, probably, but not physically. I get the sense this is about SHAME and embarrassment.

In my thinking, I am thinking that perhaps he was upset with a girl. Maybe he didn't want to get food with the roommates because he was upset over something that happening earlier that night.
Maybe he had plans to talk again with a girl, or maybe he needed to be alone in his thoughts. Maybe there was an incident at the bar, phone call maybe, or maybe that person was at the bar.
If Paul was drunk, why would a drunk person leave around midnight? Unless they got thrown out of the bar, the people that I knew that drank to excess continued to drink at the bar, not leave early.
The roommate in the news video said Paul was emotional. That makes sense that he would be emotional about a girl. He called his roommates home because although he cut himself, I think he needed someone with him
because he was "emotionally distraught". When Paul seemed fine, the roommates left. But Paul wasn't really fine. Perhaps Paul was thinking about a girl and their relationship, or perhaps the girl was seeing
someone else? What makes a man emotional concerning a woman?

IMOO.

 

[Treelights]

Why should someone have to respect an opposing view? It doesn't mean they don't respect the person, only they don't think that person's opinion is believable. One minute a poster is saying Paul went to get food at Getgo, and in a subseqent post they are saying he was badly beaten, head injury, etc. See what I mean? Theories need to flow in order for me to respect them. And...I doubt anyone gives a hoot what I think anyway. Won't stop me from posting and sticking to my theory, although I'm slowly by surely getting bored with this case and no new information.

Since Nobody that I am aware of has the Theory that has found Paul at this minute, then ALL theories could be looked at, not just some that flow in order. Life isn't always orderly. Twists and turns. Strange things happen.

IMOO.

 

[Ski1987]

Why should someone have to respect an opposing view? It doesn't mean they don't respect the person, only they don't think that person's opinion is believable. One minute a poster is saying Paul went to get food at Getgo, and in a subseqent post they are saying he was badly beaten, head injury, etc. See what I mean? Theories need to flow in order for me to respect them. And...I doubt anyone gives a hoot what I think anyway. Won't stop me from posting and sticking to my theory, although I'm slowly by surely getting bored with this case and no new information.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts DK. I would respectfully disagree that no one gives a hoot about what you think. I, for one, enjoy your posts and find your knowledge of the case and the players involved to be very thorough. I hope you continue to post.

In regards to not having to respect other people's opinions, I appreciate your perspective, which, in all honesty, is new to me. My parents and teachers always taught me that respecting others opinions was a key element to being a person of character. I also had the belief that respecting one's opinions is central to respecting the person. I guess I made the mistake of thinking my experience was universal, which was a mistake on my part. I don't agree with your opinion, but I do respect it. I should also say that my comment was in general and not specific to you; however, if it appeared it was directed to you, I sincerely apologize.

 

[Treelights]

Since reading this comment when it first came out, I have thought it to be interesting when Paul's friend saw the video of Paul and thought he was ok.

http://www.wpxi.com/news/news/local/search-resumes-wednesday-missing-agh-nurse/njdP4/

" “We had an image of him. We knew it was him. It was nice to see him there and it was nice to see he was OK,” " (Snipped By Me)

It's interesting that she thought he was "OK" in the video, as my perception of Paul and looking at the video, to me, he does Not look "OK".

In My Opinion, Only.

 

[Ski1987]

Since reading this comment when it first came out, I have thought it to be interesting when Paul's friend saw the video of Paul and thought he was ok.

http://www.wpxi.com/news/news/local/search-resumes-wednesday-missing-agh-nurse/njdP4/

" “We had an image of him. We knew it was him. It was nice to see him there and it was nice to see he was OK,” " (Snipped By Me)

It's interesting that she thought he was "OK" in the video, as my perception of Paul and looking at the video, to me, he does Not look "OK".

In My Opinion, Only.

Thanks for posting that link. I think I had forgotten that his dad said he might have been trying to get to his cousin who is at Duquesne. I agree the comment by his friend seems interesting. I am guessing that she was using the word "ok" in relative terms. I am think she meant it was good to see evidence of him alive.

 

[momthebomb]

Just a feeling and a thought that has come over me. Mario, the roommate whom seems closet to Paul was not there that night. He was working. I cannot help feel that if the other roommates were involved in any way to what happened to Paul, I would think Mario would come forward. I am not a strong believer that the roommates are nvolved, although not totally convinced of their innocence, but if they were, the chances are low that since Mario was working, he had nothing to do with it. Even if the roommates did not confide in Mario or make him privy to any involvement that night, just by living with them and having known them on this level, surely I would think he would have some kind of sense of their involvement. The more people involved or privy to something nepherios, the better the chances someone will cave and spill their guts, especially if they were not a part of it. JMO

 

[rosesfromangels]

In my thinking, I am thinking that perhaps he was upset with a girl. Maybe he didn't want to get food with the roommates because he was upset over something that happening earlier that night.
Maybe he had plans to talk again with a girl, or maybe he needed to be alone in his thoughts. Maybe there was an incident at the bar, phone call maybe, or maybe that person was at the bar.
If Paul was drunk, why would a drunk person leave around midnight? Unless they got thrown out of the bar, the people that I knew that drank to excess continued to drink at the bar, not leave early.
The roommate in the news video said Paul was emotional. That makes sense that he would be emotional about a girl. He called his roommates home because although he cut himself, I think he needed someone with him
because he was "emotionally distraught". When Paul seemed fine, the roommates left. But Paul wasn't really fine. Perhaps Paul was thinking about a girl and their relationship, or perhaps the girl was seeing
someone else? What makes a man emotional concerning a woman?
IMOO.

To this degree, I would say it's usually *alcohol*. Some people just shouldn't drink. Upthread I spoke of a mild-mannered geeky engineer I knew. A gentleman, reserved, polite. When he drank, he went berserk! He used to BITE people, and became completely uncontrollable.
Bottom line, some people should never drink. Sounds like Paul might have been one of them. I have seen seemingly stable people get very maudlin and foolish when they drink.

And, as I stated in my last post, I think this has to do a lot with shame and embarrassment. Something revealed that caused terrible shame. Perhaps that didn't have to do with a girl, at all. Again, this is just all speculation from picking bits and pieces of info from the thread. The roomies know, but I believe they are protecting Paul more than themselves. In the end, the motive itself doesn't matter as much as finding this young man. I apologize for being so direct, but the current map should be tracked for that day/time, and predictive modeling could be used to help determine where his body should surface. My apologies again for being so graphic, but I truly believe this will be the outcome.

 

[Ski1987]

To this degree, I would say it's usually *alcohol*. Some people just shouldn't drink. Upthread I spoke of a mild-mannered geeky engineer I knew. A gentleman, reserved, polite. When he drank, he went berserk! He used to BITE people, and became completely uncontrollable.
Bottom line, some people should never drink. Sounds like Paul might have been one of them. I have seen seemingly stable people get very maudlin and foolish when they drink.

Wow, he must have been fun to party with. The next day, in order to get rid of the hangover, I guess you would "bite the hair of the engineer who bit you."

 

[rosesfromangels]

Since Nobody that I am aware of has the Theory that has found Paul at this minute, then ALL theories could be looked at, not just some that flow in order. Life isn't always orderly. Twists and turns. Strange things happen.

IMOO.

This is true. I will change, or alter my thought trail if someone posts a nugget of info that helps me reveal an insight. LE does this as well. The ability to pivot with if/thens, is a good sleuthing skill. "All good" as the kids say : )
I think what we are all saying is that it's fine to vigorously pull apart ideas, just don't pull apart the poster. : ) : ) : ) : )
All good!

 

[rosesfromangels]

Wow, he must have been fun to party with. The next day, in order to get rid of the hangover, I guess you would "bite the hair of the engineer who bit you."

LOL. Sadly, we had to banish him from our little gang of revelers. He became too much. At first the guys thought it was kind of funny, but that quickly turned to concern. He was something else. Never knew what happened to him, but he was a brilliant engineer apparently.

 

[momthebomb]

I'm sorry DK, I see that you also came up with that thought about Mario going to LE if he thought they were in loved. I had not seen that post. I guess great minds think a lot.

 

[Ski1987]

LOL. Sadly, we had to banish him from our little gang of revelers. He became too much. At first the guys thought it was kind of funny, but that quickly turned to concern. He was something else. Never knew what happened to him, but he was a brilliant engineer apparently.

For some reason I find the best part was that he was an engineer. I guess that was something that he could sink his teeth into.

 

[momthebomb]

SKI, you so remind me of my husband and the corny jokes. Just to let you know, I appreciate them

 

[Ski1987]

I was able to confirm on The Find Paul Facebook page that Paul bats and throws right-handed. However, in watching the video, I can't really tell which hand is injured. The video is so far away that I can tell which hand is holding the other.

SKI, you so remind me of my husband and the corny jokes. Just to let you know, I appreciate them [/

Thanks for being the only one who appreciates my corny jokes, mom. (I have been saying this exact line my whole life. LOL)

 

[wendybtn]

To this degree, I would say it's usually *alcohol*. Some people just shouldn't drink. Upthread I spoke of a mild-mannered geeky engineer I knew. A gentleman, reserved, polite. When he drank, he went berserk! He used to BITE people, and became completely uncontrollable.
Bottom line, some people should never drink. Sounds like Paul might have been one of them. I have seen seemingly stable people get very maudlin and foolish when they drink.

And, as I stated in my last post, I think this has to do a lot with shame and embarrassment. Something revealed that caused terrible shame. Perhaps that didn't have to do with a girl, at all. Again, this is just all speculation from picking bits and pieces of info from the thread. The roomies know, but I believe they are protecting Paul more than themselves. In the end, the motive itself doesn't matter as much as finding this young man. I apologize for being so direct, but the current map should be tracked for that day/time, and predictive modeling could be used to help determine where his body should surface. My apologies again for being so graphic, but I truly believe this will be the outcome.

I absolutely agree with your assessment of alcohol use. Some people lose it, even after what you and I would not even consider an excessive amount of alcohol. And I notice people tend to drink more at the holidays. Starting his first "real" job as a an RN in the ICU is stressful for anybody. Add a little extra alcohol and if he gets overly emotional, maybe these guys felt like they had been more babysitters than roommates with him lately. Just a thought that's been on my mind for awhile.
That does not mean I believe the roommates are involved. Maybe they just didn't act as concerned as some thought they should act, but maybe his emotional, alcohol induced outbursts were just getting old.

 

[rosesfromangels]

SKI, you so remind me of my husband and the corny jokes. Just to let you know, I appreciate them [/

Thanks for being the only one who appreciates my corny jokes, mom. (I have been saying this exact line my whole life. LOL)

I do too! We are discussing/sleuthing some very grim situations, and a little laughter goes a long way. Thank you! : )

 

[rosesfromangels]

I absolutely agree with your assessment of alcohol use. Some people lose it, even after what you and I would not even consider an excessive amount of alcohol. And I notice people tend to drink more at the holidays. Starting his first "real" job as a an RN in the ICU is stressful for anybody. Add a little extra alcohol and if he gets overly emotional, maybe these guys felt like they had been more babysitters than roommates with him lately. Just a thought that's been on my mind for awhile.
That does not mean I believe the roommates are involved. Maybe they just didn't act as concerned as some thought they should act, but maybe his emotional, alcohol induced outbursts were just getting old.

Agree. And the roomies were busy getting plowed themselves. And typically, guys will tend to say, "shake it off!" and not really pay much attention to emotional outbursts. So combine all that, and here we are.

 

[charminglane]

What makes a man emotional concerning a woman?

Seeing her with another man!

 

[Ski1987]

When I was a guy in my 20's, busting chops amongst my group of friends was very common. Some were better than others at giving it, and some were better than others in taking it. We generally felt it was all in good fun and didn't think we were being mean. However, once in a while someone might go over the line and it could result in someone getting emotional. Other times, you might just catch the guy on the wrong night, and get a similar result. If, and this is a big if, this happened with Paul and his friends, and Paul did harm itself, then I'm sure his friends would feel a tremendous amount of guilt, shame, and embarrassment. These are extremely powerful emotions and may have impacted how the told the story. I think the people who are suspicious of the roommates interpret the way the story was told as an indication of covering up a physical altercation whereas people who are not suspicious of them interpret it as feeling bad for triggering Paul to hurt himself. Who knows what the real story is?

BTW, as a guy, I can say that I would never describe an angry friend as "emotional.". "Emotional, to me, has a very distinct connotation, and that is someone who is crying, weepy, teary-eyed, etc. However, I can not speak for all guys or Paul's roommate.