TxLady2
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- Aug 27, 2008
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bbm
Wow, Kateyes -- You are totally on target! Let me say first that I am fortunate that I have had a good DH for over 30 years and counting, and that is more rare than it should be.
Nevertheless.... I can remember a couple of my mother's friends who were that way -- they had had a good DH for a number of years, lost him to death, and almost immediately were in search of another one. And I have seen a couple of women co-workers who have done the same thing, mainly due to divorce, and they are now strapped with something they wish they did not have.... It's like they can't take a breath unless the man brings it to them....On the other hand, a couple of friends & co-workers have found very fine men for a second or third go-round. And when it is a bad match, the children DO pay a big price, knowing they should like this man, but also knowing he is not "Daddy," and wondering what they are doing wrong.
Yes, as Flannery O'Connor wrote, "A good man is hard to find," but "haste makes waste." Two little sayings that make sense here. And often the ones who made bad choices don't want to admit to the world, and certainly not themselves, that they have made a mistake. <shaking my head> I earnestly hope that I will never feel that way -- there are some things worse than loneliness.
(I hope this doesn't sound too holier-than-thou, but it is something I have seen, and it hurts me so see it for all people in that situation... )
And who knows what this choice means (meant) for Hailey...
Respectfully, I could say the same thing about a lot of men, who have to have a woman in their lives. However, I know many women who made bad choices in their men, but did not end up with a murdered child. Sometimes, maybe... certainly not always.