Circumstances of separation and divorce with strangers 'taking over' such as well-meaning costly lawyers and costly counsellors saying the damndest most insensitive and totally off things to their clients can send good people / preciously vulnerable parents - bad.
jmo
But there are suicides that aren't allowed to be reported at such times to consider also.
Relevance?
All the more reason why Allison would stay with GBC knowing, feeling and intellectualising her's and her girls' options.
People crack/snap and when you know a propensity exists and you have three little girls to protect you take the path of safety/least resistance.
I think GBC was a ticking time bomb given all the balls he had in the air.
I think It's possible Allison considered he was too.
jmo
Just as Darcey's dad was a ticking time bomb for 180 degree different reasons than GBC (May she rest, dearly rest in peace and all her loved ones find peace)
Agree with this 100%
My sister went through a dangerous time with her ex-husband while extricating herself from the marriage. She had to play a very careful game---calm and smiling was her face to him, while desperately trying to find public support. She did find that paying him a lot of money made him go away, eventually. And he didn't want anything more to do with the children after he got the money. He was very well-educated and a high-up government employee too. AND EVENTUALLY HE HAD HIS TIME IN JAIL TOO. Not for murder, although he did attempt to poison my mother, sister, and I. That's why we were on our guard. At the time we didn't have enough evidence, we just chose to fly under his radar and get my sister away safely.
The trial has really brought home to me how much private pain and worry Allison must have borne.
The image of the narcissist in the middle with lonely spokes radiating out is illuminating to me. I would also add that IMO you can "sense" a psychopath by listening to a group of family/friends/employees talk about their misery---sooner or later one name will pop up again and again, and voila! One person is revealed at the centre of anguish and destruction. What it takes is for people to get together and open up! If any of you feel you might be under attack, no matter how subtly, please consider finding as many trustworthy people as you can and telling them about your feelings, particularly if you have a viseral "gut" intinct to pull away from someone.
I wish Allison had gotten away.
My understanding leads me to imagine that she had tried every reasonable and rational way to live with GBC. The trigger for her to leave him might have been, for all we know, the conference. Allison might have taken Toni's presence there in her stride, Toni and Allison might have talked, compared stories, both gotten angry but also both enlightened about GBC. The outcome would equal divorce, loss of sex (Trooper's 'extra bonk' description is so apt), major loss of face, no more loans to the social pariah, no more family man construct...still, people can and do rebuild themselves from these uncomfortable outcomes. So I must agree with those who say the pivot was the insurance $$$. Just too much dosh to turn a back on.
So sordid.
So tragic. Waste of a beautiful life.
