Discussion thread for Jodi Arias Journals

This is the full chapter from the D & C that CMJA was quoting in the last pages of her journal: (https://www.lds.org/scriptures/dc-testament/dc/19.16-20?lang=eng)


Section 19


Revelation given through Joseph Smith, at Manchester, New York, likely in the summer of 1829. In his history, the Prophet introduces it as “a commandment of God and not of man, to Martin Harris, given by him who is Eternal.”
1–3, Christ has all power; 4–5, All men must repent or suffer; 6–12, Eternal punishment is God’s punishment; 13–20, Christ suffered for all, that they might not suffer if they would repent; 21–28, Preach the gospel of repentance; 29–41, Declare glad tidings.

1 I am Alpha and Omega, Christ the Lord; yea, even I am he, the beginning and the end, the Redeemer of the world.
2 I, having accomplished and finished the will of him whose I am, even the Father, concerning me—having done this that I mightsubdue all things unto myself—
3 Retaining all power, even to the destroying of Satan and his works at the end of the world, and the last great day of judgment, which I shall pass upon the inhabitants thereof, judging every man according to his works and the deeds which he hath done.
4 And surely every man must repent or suffer, for I, God, amendless.
5 Wherefore, I revoke not the judgments which I shall pass, but woes shall go forth, weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth, yea, to those who are found on my left hand.
6 Nevertheless, it is not written that there shall be no end to this torment, but it is written endless torment.
7 Again, it is written eternal damnation; wherefore it is more express than other scriptures, that it might work upon the hearts of the children of men, altogether for my name’s glory.
8 Wherefore, I will explain unto you this mystery, for it is meet unto you to know even as mine apostles.
9 I speak unto you that are chosen in this thing, even as one, that you may enter into my rest.
10 For, behold, the mystery of godliness, how great is it! For, behold, I am endless, and the punishment which is given from my hand is endless punishment, for Endless is my name. Wherefore—
11 Eternal punishment is God’s punishment.
12 Endless punishment is God’s punishment.
13 Wherefore, I command you to repent, and keep thecommandments which you have received by the hand of my servant Joseph Smith, Jun., in my name;
14 And it is by my almighty power that you have received them;
15 Therefore I command you to repent—repent, lest I smite you by the rod of my mouth, and by my wrath, and by my anger, and your sufferings be sore—how sore you know not, how exquisite you know not, yea, how hard to bear you know not.
* 16 For behold, I, God, have suffered these things for all, that theymight not suffer if they would repent;
17 But if they would not repent they must suffer even as I;
18 Which suffering caused myself, even God, the greatest of all, to tremble because of pain, and to bleed at every pore, and to suffer both body and spirit—and would that I might not drink the bitter cup, and shrink—
19 Nevertheless, glory be to the Father, and I partook andfinished my preparations unto the children of men.
20 Wherefore, I command you again to repent, lest I humble you with my almighty power; and that you confess your sins, lest you suffer these punishments of which I have spoken, of which in the smallest, yea, even in the least degree you have tasted at the time I withdrew my Spirit.*

21 And I command you that you preach naught but repentance, and show not these things unto the world until it is wisdom in me.
22 For they cannot bear meat now, but milk they must receive; wherefore, they must not know these things, lest they perish.
23 Learn of me, and listen to my words; walk in the meekness of my Spirit, and you shall have peace in me.
24 I am Jesus Christ; I came by the will of the Father, and I do his will.
25 And again, I command thee that thou shalt not covet thyneighbor’s wife; nor seek thy neighbor’s life.
26 And again, I command thee that thou shalt not covet thine own property, but impart it freely to the printing of the Book of Mormon, which contains the truth and the word of God—
27 Which is my word to the Gentile, that soon it may go to theJew, of whom the Lamanites are a remnant, that they may believe the gospel, and look not for a Messiah to come who has already come.
28 And again, I command thee that thou shalt pray vocally as well as in thy heart; yea, before the world as well as in secret, in public as well as in private.
29 And thou shalt declare glad tidings, yea, publish it upon the mountains, and upon every high place, and among every people that thou shalt be permitted to see.
30 And thou shalt do it with all humility, trusting in me, revilingnot against revilers.
31 And of tenets thou shalt not talk, but thou shalt declare repentance and faith on the Savior, and remission of sins bybaptism, and by fire, yea, even the Holy Ghost.
32 Behold, this is a great and the last commandment which I shall give unto you concerning this matter; for this shall suffice for thy daily walk, even unto the end of thy life.
33 And misery thou shalt receive if thou wilt slight these counsels, yea, even the destruction of thyself and property.
34 Impart a portion of thy property, yea, even part of thy lands, and all save the support of thy family.
35 Pay the debt thou hast contracted with the printer. Release thyself from bondage.
36 Leave thy house and home, except when thou shalt desire to see thy family;
37 And speak freely to all; yea, preach, exhort, declare the truth, even with a loud voice, with a sound of rejoicing, crying—Hosanna, hosanna, blessed be the name of the Lord God!
38 Pray always, and I will pour out my Spirit upon you, and great shall be your blessing—yea, even more than if you should obtaintreasures of earth and corruptibleness to the extent thereof.
39 Behold, canst thou read this without rejoicing and lifting up thy heart for gladness?
40 Or canst thou run about longer as a blind guide?
41 Or canst thou be humble and meek, and conduct thyself wisely before me? Yea, come unto me thy Savior. Amen.

I can't remember, for the life of me, why any of this doctrine ever made sense to me growing up as an LDS member. That's a huge reason why I left the church over 30 years ago.

Kind of strange that CMJA quoted verses 16-20. Not EVEN going to try to figure out "why" she wrote it.

Pages and pages of "Magical Thinking". All the mentions of "suicide" were probably for the benefit of someone else stumbling upon her writings. PPL, the Church, Law of Attraction, blah, blah, blah. Boring.

I think her biggest "downfall" was not writing daily during the week she murdered Travis and then not being "specific" or "detailed" when she got around to writing about her road trip. It's absence is pretty blaring.

CMJA is far more "tired" than I imagined. Her dad kind of nailed it, "strange". She's seriously not worth all the hype and publicity. Zero redeeming qualities, lies just for the sake of lying, very inflated sense of self............pathetic.

And the defense is creeping upwards towards the $3mil mark.........for what?!? More slander of the victim?
:gaah:
 
I read a little of them, but had to quit for awhile. It kind of feels almost too personal to be reading, maybe, or just so sad to read knowing the result? So far, my impression of her is that she is desperate - emotionally, spiritually, and financially. Empty. She knows she's not 'right' and latches on to schemes, other people, magic thinking, religion, etc. trying to compensate for what she knows is missing in herself. I have to say I don't get the impression she's lazy at it, she seems to work very hard at trying to find whatever it is that will make her and her life OK. She talks about her "dark" quite a bit, and compensates with a lot of upbeat, motivational phrases that I suspect are intended to fill her "dark" more than her bank account. She was a very sad, desperate, empty woman who was unfortunately also very good at hiding this from others - role playing. She knows what good is, she recognizes it in others and actually wants to be like that and to be happy - I'm actually surprised to see that. But she knows. She used others, but maybe because she was unable to find anything within herself, rather than what I had thought before. No, I'm not excusing any of her decisions or actions, or forgetting how she terrorized & tried to control other's lives - she absolutely knew right from wrong. She is now a murderer, and needs to pay for that. But I now don't see her as someone who did those things as an easy out, or how she would have preferred to live. She recognized this void within herself and in the end probably rage, revenge and desperation directed @ the person she believed failed to save her - he was her last hope. I guess I just wish someone had gotten her real help, and that Travis had recognized very early on what he was dealing with. If he had known, really known...<sigh>
 
On 12/31/07 she writes how she enjoys working at Mimi's. Calls it easy money. Thinks her coworkers are hitting on her, including her boss who is a woman and says the boss was very flirtatious with her the other day

I wonder if her boss, who was so smitten with her is the one who fired her for stealing :smile:
 
I read a little of them, but had to quit for awhile. It kind of feels almost too personal to be reading, maybe, or just so sad to read knowing the result? So far, my impression of her is that she is desperate - emotionally, spiritually, and financially. Empty. She knows she's not 'right' and latches on to schemes, other people, magic thinking, religion, etc. trying to compensate for what she knows is missing in herself. I have to say I don't get the impression she's lazy at it, she seems to work very hard at trying to find whatever it is that will make her and her life OK. She talks about her "dark" quite a bit, and compensates with a lot of upbeat, motivational phrases that I suspect are intended to fill her "dark" more than her bank account. She was a very sad, desperate, empty woman who was unfortunately also very good at hiding this from others - role playing. She knows what good is, she recognizes it in others and actually wants to be like that and to be happy - I'm actually surprised to see that. But she knows. She used others, but maybe because she was unable to find anything within herself, rather than what I had thought before. No, I'm not excusing any of her decisions or actions, or forgetting how she terrorized & tried to control other's lives - she absolutely knew right from wrong. She is now a murderer, and needs to pay for that. But I now don't see her as someone who did those things as an easy out, or how she would have preferred to live. She recognized this void within herself and in the end probably rage, revenge and desperation directed @ the person she believed failed to save her - he was her last hope. I guess I just wish someone had gotten her real help, and that Travis had recognized very early on what he was dealing with. If he had known, really known...<sigh>

I feel like this is probably the best characterization of Jodi that I have seen. That's the benefit to me of reading the journals. We are never going to get a good explanation for the murder because, well, because there isn't one. What we get from the journals is a glimpse into the mind of Jodi Arias. It is not a pleasant, hopeful place to dwell. Empty, yes. Dark, yes. Evil, ultimately, yes. There is something more there though. She needed help. Not mentally ill...but clearly not right.
 
Journal #6 on Beth's site

4-01-08 Jodi makes an entry (Interesting on April fools day) into Travis' journal saying that she loves him so much, and will miss his when she goes to CA. She states he has done more for her than any other friend ever has and thanks him for his generosity and friendship.

-Travis doesn't have any comment after that entry about her writing in his journal.

4-3-08 He writes that He is still quite lonely and "jodi keeps leaving but hasn't left". He says that Jodi left out of his driveway that morning headed for California, but reshowed up that evening - and he is also writing about Lisa and Mimi for that day's journaling

4-15-08 He talks about receiving an email saying he was qualified for the Cancun trip.

4-29-08 He mentions that he asked Mimi "today" to go on the trip and she said yes.

- Interesting that he never says that he asked Jodi to go on the trip anywhere in his notes, but I had thought that there was mention (by the Hughes or ??) that at one point, Jodi WAS on that list and that Travis changed it to Mimi. :thinking: So all that would have had to transpire from the 15-29th? Was it speculation or fact that Travis listed Jodi originally? What was the source of that information?
 
Thank you, everyone, for your observations on these journals, and thank you Tricia for the dedicated thread.

So interesting to have access to some of Travis' accounts. What he fails to mention about Arias appears to define how unimportant she really was in his overall life.

I have always believed that Arias rewrote at least the part of the 2008 entries leading up to, and beyond, her premeditation. Am I to stand corrected?
 
Journal #6 on Beth's site

4-01-08 Jodi makes an entry (Interesting on April fools day) into Travis' journal saying that she loves him so much, and will miss his when she goes to CA. She states he has done more for her than any other friend ever has and thanks him for his generosity and friendship.

-Travis doesn't have any comment after that entry about her writing in his journal.

4-3-08 He writes that He is still quite lonely and "jodi keeps leaving but hasn't left". He says that Jodi left out of his driveway that morning headed for California, but reshowed up that evening - and he is also writing about Lisa and Mimi for that day's journaling

4-15-08 He talks about receiving an email saying he was qualified for the Cancun trip.

4-29-08 He mentions that he asked Mimi "today" to go on the trip and she said yes.

- Interesting that he never says that he asked Jodi to go on the trip anywhere in his notes, but I had thought that there was mention (by the Hughes or ??) that at one point, Jodi WAS on that list and that Travis changed it to Mimi. :thinking: So all that would have had to transpire from the 15-29th? Was it speculation or fact that Travis listed Jodi originally? What was the source of that information?

IIRC the info came from a producer of JVM. I don't remember where the producer claims to have gotten that info
 
Thank you, everyone, for your observations on these journals, and thank you Tricia for the dedicated thread.

So interesting to have access to some of Travis' accounts. What he fails to mention about Arias appears to define how unimportant she really was in his overall life.

I have always believed that Arias rewrote at least the part of the 2008 entries just prior to her premeditation. Am I to stand corrected?

I too thought they were either rewritten or entirely contrived before reading them. Now, I am stumped. I chose not to read the last journal (post-murder, pre-meditation) until I put some time between that one and the others. I am still not done with the last one so someone else will have a better feel for it than I do. We know much of what she wrote isn't true. The question, though, is when she wrote it...or re-wrote it. In all honesty, I ain't got a clue. There is nothing there yet that makes me go "gotcha"...it is just as fanciful, wistful and unrealistic as the others. The fact that we KNOW that it's all lies colors my judgement. I am anxious to have others weight in on this!
 
IIRC the info came from a producer of JVM. I don't remember where the producer claims to have gotten that info

neither Travis nor Jodi mention the possibility of Jodi going to Cancun. I believe Jodi would have written all about it if it were true. It's not there
 
I think it absolutely had an impact. She fell hard for the cult. And for Travis. He was a success in the business. He took her to the Executive Dinner, had a 4,500 sq ft home, travel. Yet she couldn't earn in PPL.
In her mind...she gave up her Palm Desert home, her relationship with Daryl, converted to Mormonism, degraded herself sexually...all for Travis. When it became clear that he would not marry her , that she had essentially wasted 21 months of her life. When she went back to Yreka and a twin bed in her grandmothers modest home a waitress gig at the Purple Plum AND realized if she continued to fish in the PPL pond or the Mormon sea...that it was very likely Travis would be there to warn the next guy about getting hacked -about slashed tires etc. it was too much. She'd already, in her mind, sacrificed everything for him...now was she going to let this man who rejected her ruin her future too?

This whole journal, with a few exceptions regarding her family, is about TRAVIS. If you notice his journal entries toward the end of this collection, you'll find that she imitates the writing style in his journals, including all of the PPL stuff, the smiley faces, expressions, etc.. It's all about TRAVIS.

PPL = TRAVIS
LoA = TRAVIS
LDS = TRAVIS

Also, these writings do not sound like those of a woman in her late 20s. There's some kind of arrested development going on here, as I believe DeMarte pointed out during the guilt phase of the trial. Her ramblings sound like those of a teenager.

The trite expressions, mangled cliches, PPL sales lingo (most of which I had to skim), and new age terminology were hard to wade through but seemed like pure imitation. She completely immersed herself in TRAVIS.
 
It's all talk. The third journal has notes taken from a meeting where Chris Hughes spoke on how to deflect when people ask if you're trying to sell them into a pyramid scheme. Chris also gives hints on how to approach potential recruits, "are you open to making new money?"

Why spend so much time going to these systems meetings? She could have picked up an extra shift at PF Changs and actually made money

Because...TRAVIS.
 
For those of you that are not into using paypal via your personal credit card, perhaps a prepaid debit card could be an option. I really don't know if there is a minimum amount you have to apply to a prepaid card though. Just thinking it might be an option. :thinking:
 
On 12/31/07 she writes how she enjoys working at Mimi's. Calls it easy money. Thinks her coworkers are hitting on her, including her boss who is a woman and says the boss was very flirtatious with her the other day

Honestly, her entries from spring/summer of 2007 start to sound delusional, and they get worse as the year progresses. Also, I was quite surprised to find that the Palm Desert house was not foreclosed on until summer 2007...? An entry there says the water was turned off yet friends are coming to swim in the pool.
 
Because...TRAVIS.

True that. To impress Travis, to have something in common with Travis. And when she realized he would never marry her she still chose a PPL man, Ryan. She also stresses in journals that whoever she dates must be LDS.
 
In reading her journals I only see a killer. Someone waiting to pounce on her prey. A sadistic soul. I don't feel sorry for her, nor do I see her as a rambling teenager. I see the face of Travis, I sense how much he wished he had never met her. Her journals are full of lies. From the beginning she saw him as her meal ticket. She murdered him and felt no remorse. Her entries after the murder are heartless. Selfish. Cruel. It's almost as though you can see through the veil, that she is proud of the way she killed him. I hope JM can portray that to the jury.
 
U
Journal #6 on Beth's site

4-01-08 Jodi makes an entry (Interesting on April fools day) into Travis' journal saying that she loves him so much, and will miss his when she goes to CA. She states he has done more for her than any other friend ever has and thanks him for his generosity and friendship.

-Travis doesn't have any comment after that entry about her writing in his journal.

4-3-08 He writes that He is still quite lonely and "jodi keeps leaving but hasn't left". He says that Jodi left out of his driveway that morning headed for California, but reshowed up that evening - and he is also writing about Lisa and Mimi for that day's journaling

4-15-08 He talks about receiving an email saying he was qualified for the Cancun trip.

4-29-08 He mentions that he asked Mimi "today" to go on the trip and she said yes.

- Interesting that he never says that he asked Jodi to go on the trip anywhere in his notes, but I had thought that there was mention (by the Hughes or ??) that at one point, Jodi WAS on that list and that Travis changed it to Mimi. :thinking: So all that would have had to transpire from the 15-29th? Was it speculation or fact that Travis listed Jodi originally? What was the source of that information?

I bet, like everything else, Jodi learned MiMi was going to Cancun by snooping into Travis's email, MySpace, chat or Facebook. She also probably had figured out the code he used to listen to voicemail on his phone.
 
Journal #6 (Travis journal)
3-18-08

He talks about a lot of "things have been lost"
1)His IPod
2) His Diamond Ring..but follows up that Jodi took for "some reason" he doesn't go into detail about... and it was found
3) Roommate's camera...which Travis found in his BMW and couldn't figure out why/how it got there
4) His previous journal (which appears to have been stolen on/before the first date of the first entry in this journal of 3/15/08 )
 
I too thought they were either rewritten or entirely contrived before reading them. Now, I am stumped. I chose not to read the last journal (post-murder, pre-meditation) until I put some time between that one and the others. I am still not done with the last one so someone else will have a better feel for it than I do. We know much of what she wrote isn't true. The question, though, is when she wrote it...or re-wrote it. In all honesty, I ain't got a clue. There is nothing there yet that makes me go "gotcha"...it is just as fanciful, wistful and unrealistic as the others. The fact that we KNOW that it's all lies colors my judgement. I am anxious to have others weight in on this!

It's hard to say because of the delusional nature of the entries, but I have wondered about May 26 and June 1 in particular. I don't think these entries were rewritten, but I wonder about the state of mind in which they were written in the first place.
 
I'm on the phone now so I'll have to find links (and refresh my memory) later on .. By memory it was related to his house.



Was it the Hughes', or Travis' mentor Dr. Karl Hiatt that he (Travis) was supposed to have borrowed money from? There is too much to try and remember, LOL. I recall reading it, but don't ask me where.
 

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