Lori Ruff Identified as Kimberly McLean of PA

A part of me feels like this cases resolution leaves me helpless and powerless. We've seen at least three cases in the last year that featured "runaways" - Tammy Jo Alexander (Caledonia Doe), Jason Callahan (Grateful Doe) and now Kim McLean (Lori Ruff/Becky Sue)... in each of these cases we've seen their parents helpless. "I tried to file a report but because they left on their own accord..." It makes me feel like a great number of the cases we see here, the unidentified ones, are born of kids leaving home and just never looking back. And that makes me feel helpless. If their parents can't or don't report them as missing, how would they ever know? I suppose, at the end of the day, our efforts are not in vain, as at least we're getting these cases into the public eye. And I suppose without that, they'd still be Does.

There should be a rule, whereby if a grown adult is missing for more than, say, 10 years, they should be allowed to be entered for DNA testing. Pretty sure that would clear up a few UIDs. I think in the UK if someone is missing more than 7 years they can be declared dead.
 
There should be a rule, whereby if a grown adult is missing for more than, say, 10 years, they should be allowed to be entered for DBA testing. Pretty sure that would clear up a few UIDs. I think in the UK if someone is missing more than 7 years they can be declared dead.

I wonder how we could push for change. Maybe I'll contact my local reps about that. It would solve a lot of problems for sure.


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Wonder if this ability to locate family of a DNA donor could be used to locate unidentified criminals? I guess none of us would want the call, we think one of your cousins is a serial killer..can you give us a list of their names? So signing up with one of these ancestry dna sites, might now have new privacy concerns. the crimes solving part of me says go for it. the privacy rights part of me says whoa.
 
OMG I have been away for nearly two weeks as my mother's health failed. She passed yesterday and I have been a wreck. I thought of coming here tonight for a distraction. THANK YOU!!!! Wow.
:rose: so sorry for your loss..........
 
So am I! In fact, I think it would make a great thread topic. If anyone would like to kick one off -- perhaps do a little research on the subject to share with the rest of us -- I know the effort would be appreciated.

Off and on throughout the years I've done the family tree route with my own family. By so doing I was besieged by reporters when "they" inadvertantly let a man "suspected" of killing my cousin and many others out of prison. I had written to a newspaper for clippings, and next thing I know there was a crowd and a blurb about me. The second time, I met relatives from way across the country who gave me a quilt done by my greatgrandmother. The last incident was a plea by a woman looking for her father - my uncle - and no one in the family even knew she existed. Unfortunately, by the time I saw the post, she was long gone.

The family tree idea is good, but DNA is beyond most of us. Even so, this is fascinating and I'm glad this case was resolved. Mainly.
 
Wonder if this ability to locate family of a DNA donor could be used to locate unidentified criminals? I guess none of us would want the call, we think one of your cousins is a serial killer..can you give us a list of their names? So signing up with one of these ancestry dna sites, might now have new privacy concerns. the crimes solving part of me says go for it. the privacy rights part of me says whoa.

I wrote 3 govt officials (like senators) and brought that up -- I said perhaps we should allow families of missing/runaway persons to go to the police and give up DNA *solely* to see if they match anything in the UID database, without fear of being put through the ringer to match them with unsolved crimes.


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I wonder how we could push for change. Maybe I'll contact my local reps about that. It would solve a lot of problems for sure.


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i was just going to say this same thing. maybe this will ultimately be kimberly's legacy. maybe we can honor her and the countless other UIDs by calling for change. i felt the same way after this was solved. THOUSANDS of people spent years scouring over every database or news article about any missing person across the country in the years around 1988 (and some, even foreign countries) and it never really mattered too much because she wasn't in any of them. that is a crushing blow to the hope of all of us who pray and hope and volunteer to give everyone a name and their dignity back as they leave this world. things have come a long way with missing persons investigations and reports since the 70s and 80s but, as has been made clear this year with so many long-term cold cases being solved), there is still so much more progress that is needed. i just started posting here so i am not sure about how to create threads but maybe someone could create a thread where people discuss what changes are needed and others could pose ideas on steps to make those changes, and we could put together some sort of preliminary call to LEO (or later, even congress) that would officially change the future for UIDs to come. unfortunately, there are many that may never be solved for a myriad of reasons but instead of kimberly's story draining us of our hope, perhaps we could use this as a stepping stool to help others in the future? just an idea. if this is not something can can be done on this site, i am sorry for the suggestion. if anyone is able to make that thread, please link me. i think we have some truly amazing sleuths on this forum who could shed incredible light on these processes and it might actually lead to REAL and LASTING positive change if even a few of us are committed. i am just a fly on the wall compared to some of you skilled, genius sleuths but i would be 100% committed to this cause if it starts and i would help in any way possible.

maybe it is the height of hubris to think that we could be this major source of change but when i think about tim miller, john walsh, and the like - these were normal people with day jobs who just decided to turn despair into hope, right? so, i may not be related to any of these missing persons, but i am a lover of humanity and i pray that one day no one will have to go to their grave stripped of their identity and dignity like so many before them. i have been looking for a way to be more involved but there are so many cases to choose from. i guess i never really thought until now that maybe i could (with A LOT of help and guidance) be helpful to the overall success of ALL the cases but i think together we absolutely could be a force that strong. kimberly, grateful doe, wetterling, etc have filled me with SO MUCH hope this year. some of these people can and will still be identified and restored in our lifetime, lets make it so those that come after us have learned from our mistakes?

just a thought. sorry for disorganized word vomit and sorry if this was too off topic. kimberly's revelation has made me so emotional and caused me to reflect a lot on how i can truly be of help, and not just a lurker or studier of these cases. kimberly has truly inspired me. i want to be a tool for change and i just didn't know a better time to speak up or a better place to do so. y'all are the best "armchair sleuths" (does y'all no justice) i have ever seen and i hope one day to be as skilled as y'all. lets do this?

:websleuther::praying::couch:
 
Here's what I wrote to my reps:

I'm writing to see if you would be interested in researching or putting forth a bill that allows families to file missing persons reports if the person leaves on their own accord. We've seen three cold cases solved this year alone, linked below, that involved "runaways."

1.) Tammy Jo Alexander
2.) Jason Callahan
3.) Kimberly McLean

In each one of these cases, these decedents left. Families tried filing police reports but those reports were either "lost" or were denied because they left of their own free will. Kimberly McLean's case was solved through DNA; investigators took DNA samples from her living child, and matched it to that of a family in Philadelphia. Without the DNA testing, they would've never known. Kim left in 1986, told her family never to come after her and that she would change her name twice so they couldn't find her. She committed suicide in the driveway of her in-laws home in TX in 2010, under the identity of "Lori Ruff." It took 6 years to figure out who she truly was and over 30 years to bring her mother closure.

I understand that people who leave their lives behind by choice do so for a reason, and that there is reasonable expectation for privacy, but who knows how many people ran away during the 60s, 70s, 80s, 90s, and are now dead and unidentified.

I suppose my point in writing is to see if you can't help get a law or something passed that allows the family of a missing person to go to the police if they haven't heard from them in 10 years. I'm sure police don't have the manpower to investigate and hunt down every missing person ever, but maybe if the families requests were taken seriously? Maybe they could voluntarily give their DNA samples (without fear of being searched in a crime database) to match them to unidentified remains throughout the US?

Two of the most intriguing cases that are still unsolved are that of Lyle Stevik and our very own, local Annandale Jane Doe. Wouldn't it be grand to solve their identities and bring their families closure?

Anyway, I hope you can help, or at least point me in the right direction. I sincerely appreciate you taking the time to read this and consider my proposal.

Feel welcome to use it, or, bounce your own ideas off of it. But I encourage you all to write your reps about this.
 
Thanks, Astrid. I used your template to email my legislator, also.
 
Thanks, Astrid. I used your template to email my legislator, also.

Thank YOU!!!! I hope everyone else will follow suit - we could help bring some much needed closure to thousands of families here in the US :))) (hey and maybe even create new jobs in the process lol)
 
So glad there is a positive ID for this case, and that her daughter knows who her family is now.
 
i know we are not supposed to sleuth kimberly's family but while looking for old high school photos of her i stumbled across some information that seems... interesting? i am so unskilled at investigating compared to y'all but if i am right, it definitely sheds some light on a few of the things scribbled on the "notes" page found in the lock box. if what i found is relevant, it is not so much a mystery as it is sad proof that she missed and perhaps monitored/kept track of her family after she left. if what i found is correct, the "notes" page is just a sad look at someone who missed home (or certain aspects of it at least) and may have regretted leaving for at least those reasons.

since we can't sleuth the family here (which isn't really what i am doing anyway) is there anywhere people are currently carrying on conversations like this one? i just thought it would be interesting to see if someone could help me verify and then possibly share with you all (once i can be sure) how it connected with the notes page. but since it relates to the family (all innocent and perhaps "boring" information - nothing disparaging) i don't know where to share this information if it does turn out to be accurate. again, it could be nothing. i don't have the paid accounts to look further. is there a closed thread where people are discussing things like this? or is there *gasp* a forum on a different site where someone might be doing similar things to carry on with this case to wrap it all up for everyone and their lingering questions? :X
 
Kimberly may have hated the changes in her life and wanted to be anyone but herself. I wonder as she matured if she had any regrets about what she did. Once she committed the crime of identity theft there would be no going back. She would never be able to celebrate her birthday, see her mom or her sister if she started missing them. Never able to tell her family she had a child. What a heavy burden to pack around. I wonder if she ever googled and tried to keep tabs on these people? Would love to hear from the sister and hear what the family dynamics were like at home. There are more chapters to this story. I hope some of it comes out. When her marriage fell apart she must have felt she had reached the end of the line. No where else to go. Backed in a corner. It puzzles me why she kept the BST identity stuff. Was she wanting someone to figure it out if something happened to her? But why not keep something from her Kimberly Mclean life locked up with it? Its bizarre and makes no sense.
 
i know we are not supposed to sleuth kimberly's family but while looking for old high school photos of her i stumbled across some information that seems... interesting? i am so unskilled at investigating compared to y'all but if i am right, it definitely sheds some light on a few of the things scribbled on the "notes" page found in the lock box. if what i found is relevant, it is not so much a mystery as it is sad proof that she missed and perhaps monitored/kept track of her family after she left. if what i found is correct, the "notes" page is just a sad look at someone who missed home (or certain aspects of it at least) and may have regretted leaving for at least those reasons.

since we can't sleuth the family here (which isn't really what i am doing anyway) is there anywhere people are currently carrying on conversations like this one? i just thought it would be interesting to see if someone could help me verify and then possibly share with you all (once i can be sure) how it connected with the notes page. but since it relates to the family (all innocent and perhaps "boring" information - nothing disparaging) i don't know where to share this information if it does turn out to be accurate. again, it could be nothing. i don't have the paid accounts to look further. is there a closed thread where people are discussing things like this? or is there *gasp* a forum on a different site where someone might be doing similar things to carry on with this case to wrap it all up for everyone and their lingering questions? :X

Ok, so now I am burning with curiousity! I have been trying to find school pics of her as well and haven't stumbled on anything yet.
 
I have encountered two schizophrenic individuals without identities in my career as a psych nurse. No real names no real history. Spent hours trying to break through the barriers. Sat at the web sites with them when stable on meds. Nothing. That is what I thought Kimberlys situation was. Very sad families out there I'm sure, never to know.
 
No sleuthing KM's family, nor posting names, addresses, telephone nos., etc.

Thank you :tyou:

Thanks for clarifying this - are we allowed to keep sleuthing on KM and how she ended up with the BST ID and so on, or is it kind of case closed from a websleuths perspective? This is the first case I've followed on here that's been solved so I'm not sure how it works.

Hi, Sunny. I wouldn't say it's "case closed" just yet. Many questions have been left unanswered, particularly with regard to the missing two years. I suggest further sleuthing be limited to tracing KM's footsteps during that period of time, when she was away from her family.

Naturally, we're all a bit curious about why she left in the first place. But it's practically impossible to explore that question without violating TOS. So we'll have to pass on that one, I'm afraid.

ETA: MSM reports covering KM's home life, should there be any, can be discussed.

Thank you for the clarification! I just wanted to quote to make sure people saw this and didn't get carried away. I did a little sleuthing but I think I might just let it go now. For those curious, however, there are not really 2 missing years of Kim's life. In 1986 she lived alone in King of Prussia, PA just as the ST article said. I found her address in 1987 and she was still in PA, living in an apt alone. She lived in Devon only 1.5 miles from the Strafford library that she had the phone number for on the notes page. It seems she never used her name again when she left PA in 1987 or 1988. The time frame for when she did this was very short--I would guess less than a year. A lot can happen in just a few months, however.
 
The biggest question is why Kimberly was not reported missing? Was it because she was 18 and could legally do what she wanted?

Of course we must remember that things were totally different back then. If a child of legal age said she was leaving, I do not think the parents would go running to the police department to file a missing persons report. JMO?
 
Some of those dates I found are wildly wrong though! The Devon one said 1987-1998 which we know can't be true since she was already LEK by 1998.

Thank you for the clarification! I just wanted to quote to make sure people saw this and didn't get carried away. I did a little sleuthing but I think I might just let it go now. For those curious, however, there are not really 2 missing years of Kim's life. In 1986 she lived alone in King of Prussia, PA just as the ST article said. I found her address in 1987 and she was still in PA, living in an apt alone. She lived in Devon only 1.5 miles from the Strafford library that she had the phone number for on the notes page. It seems she never used her name again when she left PA in 1987 or 1988. The time frame for when she did this was very short--I would guess less than a year. A lot can happen in just a few months, however.
 

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