Found Deceased NC - Maddox Ritch, 6 w/Autism, Gastonia, 22 Sept 2018

[Miamama]

This has probably already been said, but this case is even scarier since little Maddox cannot scream or cry -- or did not, if he was taken by someone. That will also make it more difficult, IMO, for the rescue team to locate him -- but if he were to hear his name, perhaps he will be able to make noise somehow -- with a stick, throwing a rock or banging on something.

Let's hope this one will have a happy ending, folks!

Non verbal doesn't mean he can't be vocal. It just means he doesn't have meaningful expressive language using speech.
To me the scariest, or strangest, part is that the dogs haven't picked up a scent. A little boy running should have been throwing off scent.

 

[rosesfromangels]

Yes I’m very confused about this. There is a huge difference between being non verbal and not talking to strangers. Like HUGE. As I mentioned pages back, my aspen is non verbal. There are no words. He does hum, cry, laugh. If he were in danger though, he would not know the appropriate response. So who said non verbal?

Second, the no food or drinks for days. This is very typical of ASD kids. Aspen takes a special medicine at night to increase appetite. He would go hours and hours not eating but we encourage eating and he will usually eat something after a little while. I find it concerning they’d let Maddox go days bc most autistic kids are super picky. They don’t get all the veggies and fruits neurotypical kids get. So you can’t let them go for days!

Lastly, I’m not saying the parents did it. I can say though, I could see it. I love my boy. With all my heart. He’s in diapers and I’ll wipe him til the day I die and feed him each piece of cereal like I do every night. But there are days, oh are there days. There are days where I ask what kind of life we are living? What kind of life is aspen living? Am I making him suffer when he screams and hits me and himself bc he’s so upset? I’ve has suicidal thoughts - that we’d be better off bc this isn’t a life for us. Some days we can’t enjoy anything bc of his tantrums. I’m not saying the parents did it but I could see it.

Thank you for your honest and powerful post. I believe God beings special children to this earth to teach compassion and love. Thank you for being a great example. Apparently God trusts you with this important assignment.

 

[swanniee11]

my1nonlyaspen- GOD BLESS YOU!!!! I'M ACTUALLY CRYING READING YOUR POST. GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR SON. PRAYERS.

 

[Miamama]

Yes I’m very confused about this. There is a huge difference between being non verbal and not talking to strangers. Like HUGE. As I mentioned pages back, my aspen is non verbal. There are no words. He does hum, cry, laugh. If he were in danger though, he would not know the appropriate response. So who said non verbal?

Second, the no food or drinks for days. This is very typical of ASD kids. Aspen takes a special medicine at night to increase appetite. He would go hours and hours not eating but we encourage eating and he will usually eat something after a little while. I find it concerning they’d let Maddox go days bc most autistic kids are super picky. They don’t get all the veggies and fruits neurotypical kids get. So you can’t let them go for days!

Lastly, I’m not saying the parents did it. I can say though, I could see it. I love my boy. With all my heart. He’s in diapers and I’ll wipe him til the day I die and feed him each piece of cereal like I do every night. But there are days, oh are there days. There are days where I ask what kind of life we are living? What kind of life is aspen living? Am I making him suffer when he screams and hits me and himself bc he’s so upset? I’ve has suicidal thoughts - that we’d be better off bc this isn’t a life for us. Some days we can’t enjoy anything bc of his tantrums. I’m not saying the parents did it but I could see it.

Hugs. I was there year one...maybe even year two. It gets so, so much better though.

 

[HeartOfGranite]

Is there an obvious path around the lake? Or was it just grass/trees, etc.?

It's a wide, flat paved path, about a mile and a half total. You can see the whole loop from almost anywhere on it. There is one corner that goes behind a public works building where you might lose sight of someone briefly but that's about it. It certainly is possible someone could get lost from the trail, but it's not very likely as there's little concealment on the trail itself.
However, there are some woods on the outside of the loop, some of them dense and swampy. There's an old structure of some sort behind the public works building, fenced off. I posted a photo upthread of the woods. They are swampy and creeks run through as well. IMO, it would be possible for a small child to get lost in there, but to remain lost for this long seems less likely. If there are holes or deep areas in the swamp, it would be more possible for sure.

 

[heartgoesout]

Non verbal doesn't mean he can't be vocal. It just means he doesn't have meaningful expressive language using speech.
To me the scariest, or strangest, part is that the dogs haven't picked up a scent. A little boy running should have been throwing off scent.

Was that confirmed no scent has been picked up?

 

[Miamama]

Was that confirmed no scent has been picked up?

I don't know for sure, but haven't seen any mention of it. Would LE take that as a confirmation that he was in the park? If a dog picked up his scent but lost it?

 

[TeaTime]

Yes I’m very confused about this. There is a huge difference between being non verbal and not talking to strangers. Like HUGE. As I mentioned pages back, my aspen is non verbal. There are no words. He does hum, cry, laugh. If he were in danger though, he would not know the appropriate response. So who said non verbal?

Second, the no food or drinks for days. This is very typical of ASD kids. Aspen takes a special medicine at night to increase appetite. He would go hours and hours not eating but we encourage eating and he will usually eat something after a little while. I find it concerning they’d let Maddox go days bc most autistic kids are super picky. They don’t get all the veggies and fruits neurotypical kids get. So you can’t let them go for days!

Lastly, I’m not saying the parents did it. I can say though, I could see it. I love my boy. With all my heart. He’s in diapers and I’ll wipe him til the day I die and feed him each piece of cereal like I do every night. But there are days, oh are there days. There are days where I ask what kind of life we are living? What kind of life is aspen living? Am I making him suffer when he screams and hits me and himself bc he’s so upset? I’ve has suicidal thoughts - that we’d be better off bc this isn’t a life for us. Some days we can’t enjoy anything bc of his tantrums. I’m not saying the parents did it but I could see it.

Thank you for your honesty. People need to speak up and acknowledge that special needs kids take a huge toll on the family. We need to have mothers and fathers who act as caretakers be able to be compensated for it. Many must give up one of the 2 jobs in order for a parent to take care of the child and the child care is brutally expensive. We need to fix that, at least. It does take all of one's life and requires a lifetime commitment to sacrifice of self for another. May God guide you all, those of you who parent these special human beings. No greater love. But, everyone has a breaking point. Everyone. I could see it too. I do not suspect it here. I suspect the child ran off when the adults turned their attention elsewhere momentarily. I believe this child is lost in that park and will be found.

Surely, heat sensing radar is being used.

 

[Steelslady]

Yes I’m very confused about this. There is a huge difference between being non verbal and not talking to strangers. Like HUGE. As I mentioned pages back, my aspen is non verbal. There are no words. He does hum, cry, laugh. If he were in danger though, he would not know the appropriate response. So who said non verbal?

Second, the no food or drinks for days. This is very typical of ASD kids. Aspen takes a special medicine at night to increase appetite. He would go hours and hours not eating but we encourage eating and he will usually eat something after a little while. I find it concerning they’d let Maddox go days bc most autistic kids are super picky. They don’t get all the veggies and fruits neurotypical kids get. So you can’t let them go for days!

Lastly, I’m not saying the parents did it. I can say though, I could see it. I love my boy. With all my heart. He’s in diapers and I’ll wipe him til the day I die and feed him each piece of cereal like I do every night. But there are days, oh are there days. There are days where I ask what kind of life we are living? What kind of life is aspen living? Am I making him suffer when he screams and hits me and himself bc he’s so upset? I’ve has suicidal thoughts - that we’d be better off bc this isn’t a life for us. Some days we can’t enjoy anything bc of his tantrums. I’m not saying the parents did it but I could see it.

I am so sorry to hear of your pain. I have several friends and a family member with an autistic child, and I know they can all relate to how you feel. It is challenging and emotionally and physically exhausting. One of my friends was so shocked that her son loved not only coming to my house and loved playing with my kids, but that when she went to the store or ran an errand of two, he was wonderful at my house. Unfortunately, he was not comfortable with anyone else, and she has a loving and caring family and other friends who tried to help give her a break, but they would frantically call her and tell her he was having a rough time, screaming, crying, rocking back and forth, and in a couple of instances, he kept trying to get out of their homes to try and find his mother. She was just so grateful and relieved for that few minutes of time alone, and one time she stayed out and got her hair done and a ran a few other errands, calling me inbetween to make sure everything was ok, and she just couldn't get over how he was happy and content. I've had this with several autistic children that have come in my home, however, I had one slight advantage over the other family members and friends- because of my schooling and field placements working with children from autism (Mental Health) I learned to gently gain the trust of these children by simply letting them be, when they were around me. Some would sit on my lap, while some stayed away, but after several visits, they grew comfortable with me. I would tell my friends, after we brought all of our children outside to play, to go and grab a coffee in the house for a few minutes. Sometimes, the child was fine, others, it took a few tries before they were comfortable to stay outside with me. It takes a lot of love, patience, and understanding.

Autistic children have their own routines and sets of likes and dislikes. They will only eat a certain food- such as Honey Nut Cheerios- so one of my friends had to stock up and keep it in the house, and believe me, her son knew when she tried to serve him the store version because they were out of his regular cereal, and he screamed and threw the box and bowl across the room. This is so so hard for parents to live with daily, and while you learn what triggers some of their tantrums, there are days when something new will trigger one and it dumbfounds the parents, as they may not know what upset them in the store or at the park, as nothing seems obvious to the parent. One of my friends used to have to sit down on the floor in the middle of the floor with her son while he rocked back and forth, humming, until he was ready to get up. People made some rude comments to her, but she ignored them and took care of her son.

My heart aches for all of your loving and wonderful parents- it is so hard to see how you really have no lives at all, and it is even harder when there are other children in the house hold who don't understand why you can't go to the lake that day or why you have to leave the playground just as you got there. This is why I feel that there needs to be more help from the community and medical profession- parents need a break, and they also need a vacation, even if it's just three or four days, to recharge their own batteries. It's also hard when your handsome autistic son ends up taller and more muscular than you, and you have no choice but to put him in a home because physically, you can't handle him anymore, for your own safety- one of my family members and another friend went through such an excruciating decision to put their sons in homes with 24 hour care because they just couldn't do it anymore. The poor mothers feel so guilty, like they let down their sons, when they did every thing that they could to give them a happy, healthy, safe and loving environment.

 

[Steelslady]

my1nonlyaspen- GOD BLESS YOU!!!! I'M ACTUALLY CRYING READING YOUR POST. GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR SON. PRAYERS.

I am crying with you. It is so so heartbreaking, what these poor parents go through every day and every night. No break from it, no holidays, no vacations- it is a daily and constant battle for them. We really really need to do something to help these parents out, to give them a day a week out, to just be able to spend time with their spouse at a movie or dinner, to spend time with their other children so that they can focus on them for a few hours while their autistic child is in safe and loving hands.

 

[MsMarple]

Maybe Maddox’ father was there to play Pokémon Go and he was busy looking at his phone to notice that Maddox had wandered off? JMO

My guess is no, judging from his mother's description of him in an interview today (linked below) but I do think there were lots of people out that day. Maybe that's what LE was calling leads?
WDBJ7 on Twitter
I'm glad Maddox' mom is finally using msm to spread the word. I'm also glad to read that LE will keep searching the park tonight.

LE says there were hundreds of people at the park including a professional photographer who they want to speak to. They have finally named the parents too.

Maddox's father, Ian, was not at the Tuesday briefing. FBI spokeswoman Shelley Lynch said the father was at the park with searchers, retracing his steps with Maddox from Saturday.

"He is with us across the street helping us with this investigation and to further this case," Lynch said.

The father and the other adult, who has not been identified, told authorities they got around the back of the lake when the boy started running.

When they started running after him, they lost sight of him.

'I want my baby back:' Mother of missing Gastonia boy makes tearful plea
More at the link. Apologies if this has already been posted - I left for a while and haven't caught up yet.

 

[Amonet]

I think when a child goes missing and LE are informed of the word 'autism' maybe they are trained to automatically ask if the child is verbal or non-verbal. I don't think it's as much about whether the child can/will speak at home with family, but more to do with whether the child would speak to a stranger who approached and said, "hello, are you lost?" or for when the searchers are looking, and the parents could be asked how they believe the child would act in various scenarios, for instance the child is hiding or stuck and a searcher passes five feet away but the child isn't visible, if the searcher is calling the child's name will the child call out in response, will the child remain not speaking, or maybe the searchers need to focus their ears not on listening for a child's words but on 'noises' that a scared or injured child might be making.

So I think it's purely about getting a basic understanding of the child for the benefit of searching for the missing child, not about getting a 100% detailed description of whether the child can say a few words, or a few more, or if the child will only speak to parents or if the child might speak to some teachers or relatives and not others.

 

[my1nonlyaspen]

Bare with me as I reply on my phone. I’m usually on a PC. Thank you to everyone for the kind words. Especially PP, you’re a god send to do that for the mother. Seriously. Our families live further away and I don’t really trust anyone since aspen can’t talk. But you are right, those who let him be, he’s close with.

I won’t derail the thread but it’s true, there needs to be more resources. And while I hope and pray this boy is found, I think it can bring to the light the pressure we have on us. Aspen is an only so no other siblings. Shoot, that scares me too. Anyway, even if hurting his kid never crossed his mind, it is hard to do this and maybe people will see this.





Autistic children have their own routines and sets of likes and dislies. They will only eat a certain food- such as Honey Nut Cheerios- so one of my friends had to stock up and keep it in the house, and believe me, her son knew when she tried to serve him the store version because they were out of his regular cereal, and he screamed and threw the box and bowl across the room. This is so so hard for parents to live with daily, and while you learn what triggers some of their tantrums, there are days when something new will trigger one and it dumbfounds the parents, as they may not know what upset them in the store or at the park, as nothing seems obvious to the parent. One of my friends used to have to sit down on the floor in the middle of the floor with her son while he rocked back and forth, humming, until he was ready to get up. People made some rude comments to her, but she ignored them and took care of her son.

My heart aches for all of your loving and wonderful parents- it is so hard to see how you really have no lives at all, and it is even harder when there are other children in the house hold who don't understand why you can't go to the lake that day or why you have to leave the playground just as you got there. This is why I feel that there needs to be more help from the community and medical profession- parents need a break, and they also need a vacation, even if it's just three or four days, to recharge their own batteries. It's also hard when your handsome autistic son ends up taller and more muscular than you, and you have no choice but to put him in a home because physically, you can't handle him anymore, for your own safety- one of my family members and another friend went through such an excruciating decision to put their sons in homes with 24 hour care because they just couldn't do it anymore. The poor mothers feel so guilty, like they let down their sons, when they did[/QUOTE]

I think when a child goes missing and LE are informed of the word 'autism' maybe they are trained to automatically ask if the child is verbal or non-verbal. I don't think it's as much about whether the child can/will speak at home with family, but more to do with whether the child would speak to a stranger who approached and said, "hello, are you lost?" or for when the searchers are looking, and the parents could be asked how they believe the child would act in various scenarios, for instance the child is hiding or stuck and a searcher passes five feet away but the child isn't visible, if the searcher is calling the child's name will the child call out in response, will the child remain not speaking, or maybe the searchers need to focus their ears not on listening for a child's words but on 'noises' that a scared or injured child might be making.

So I think it's purely about getting a basic understanding of the child for the benefit of searching for the missing child, not about getting a 100% detailed description of whether the child can say a few words, or a few more, or if the child will only speak to parents or if the child might speak to some teachers or relatives and not others.

 

[MsMarple]

Reposting the latest update for convenience:

 

[Scrapper18]

Unless you have a child with autism. It’s impossible to understand how this happens so often. You are emotional drained , you have to be “on 24/7” what I mean is a lot of autistic kids do not sleep. We went 18 month of HELL with our daughter when she totally stopped sleeping. I’m not joking her brain couldn’t shut down. I don’t know how I lived through that period of time. We found a new dr who rx her a Med used for blood pressure. That lowers her bp forcing her body to finally sleep. That no sleep started at age 3, that’s when she regressed into autism. Now 11 years later she still needs that medication to sleep. She takes a dose so high that it would kill a typical person. But her chemistry isn’t typical she reacts to meds so different.

Anyway I had to lock myself in the bedroom with her at night. She still got out of the bedroom a time or 2 but I woke to catch her. I still sleep with her . She escaped from our house one time we had chains and locks. And her siblings all 7 to 14 yrs older then she was plus her dad and I where home. Yet she some how got out without us noticing. She used a broom handle ( we lAter found out to undo the top chain and hook lock. We had to call the police. It was my worst day of my life . They wouldn’t let us look. But found her in the middle of the busiest intersection in town about 1/2 mile from home. All the cars in all directions thankfully had noticed and stopped so it was quite a traffic jam right at the noon hour. How she came back unarmed is a mystery.

A year later she was at school with 4 adults supervising 6 kids. When they were going inside they realized one was missing. Mine of course. She got out of the fence ran about the length of a football field. There’s a main road that runs to the north of the school. They thought she was inside the school until another child said they sAw a child running towards the Main Street. Except there is a 8 foot drainage ditch that also runs along that street . They found my 5 year old in that ditch which you couldn’t see her unless you went into the ditch it had 4 ft of god knows what kind of crappy water in it. My daughter was covered to the bottom of her pig tails in that crap.

So even at school she was able to escape. Again I don’t know how the child is still alive. I don’t know how long she was there before they found her. Her dr even went to the school to check out the ditch. About 2 yrs later she became really ill. Hospital for 2 weeks. She had a internal parasite in her body. Attacking her liver. They couldn’t figure out how she got it. It’s only really found in 3rd world countries. But her great dr had kept a sample from that ditch water and the rare parasite she had was also found in that sample from 2 years prior. She had been living with it until it took over parts of her body and was detected. For awhile they were talking about a liver transplant.

Point is sorry this got so long. We heAr all the bad parent at fault cases. But there’s so many more we don’t hear about where the parent is diligent . It’s so hard when your baby is non verbal and can’t even tell you something is going on in thier body. I swear my child has a guardian angel she’s just beat the odds to many times. My dad died right before these episodes happened. I swear he had to of been protecting her. I still can’t get over that she didn’t drown. She’s attracted to body’s of wAter but in this case it seems she was prob running and fell in. They found raw sewage in this ditch . I will never judge a parent of a child with autism who is a known eloper. Not until I see prove they did something. I can only imagine what people thought of me. And I’m super over protective. Never thought this would happen to me. Geeze sorry for the book.

Completely relate. We have a 15 year old with autism. She takes 10mg of melatonin every night and still does not sleep through the night. We now have an alarm on the house - every door and every window. We did not give her the code; so she can not disarm it.

 

[BlueFish]

In regards to the FBI and local police commenting on people needing to stop gossiping on social media, this is sorely needed. I am local and I can tell you I have lost all faith in humanity based on what I have seen on FB since this child went missing..........-.

Absolutely all of this!!!
There was even a pastor criticizing the family for not speaking out.

It’s so sad and I believe this is why the father’s statement speaks of never being able to hurt his child.

Add to this people who claim to know the family saying “he would never hurt him” and those who say “I wouldn’t be surprised if he did something.” It all makes me pray nothing ever throws me into the spotlight.

It’s all very shameful!!!.

 

[Alethea]

I really like this FBI media contact. I think she does a really good job explaining what is going on and why they are asking the media to do certain things. The FBI has historically been uncomfortable with direct communication and I think this is a good step in this 24/7 media day and age.

 

[AmyPond]

I think when a child goes missing and LE are informed of the word 'autism' maybe they are trained to automatically ask if the child is verbal or non-verbal. I don't think it's as much about whether the child can/will speak at home with family, but more to do with whether the child would speak to a stranger who approached and said, "hello, are you lost?" or for when the searchers are looking, and the parents could be asked how they believe the child would act in various scenarios, for instance the child is hiding or stuck and a searcher passes five feet away but the child isn't visible, if the searcher is calling the child's name will the child call out in response, will the child remain not speaking, or maybe the searchers need to focus their ears not on listening for a child's words but on 'noises' that a scared or injured child might be making.

So I think it's purely about getting a basic understanding of the child for the benefit of searching for the missing child, not about getting a 100% detailed description of whether the child can say a few words, or a few more, or if the child will only speak to parents or if the child might speak to some teachers or relatives and not others.

I think you are 100% right. I refer to my son as non-verbal when asked about him. And he wears an AlertMe Band that says he has non-verbal autism. But...he can repeat many words. And at home he has started saying a few things (like a specific snack he wants.) However, for the purpose of something like getting lost...he would definitely be considered non-verbal. So I am sure that is why the parents said that initially.

 

[UnicornShoe]

Considering how many registered sex offenders live within 3 miles of the Rankin Lake Park (140), it wouldn't surprise me a bit if he was kidnapped. These types of reservoir/lake parks are really common in NC, and they seem to attract and unsavory element that preys on the unsuspecting families that visit. When we first moved there, we were going to take our kids to one about 20 minutes away, and some neighbors warned us that there had been some creepy incidents of weirdos hiding in the trees and exposing themselves to passerby, chasing people off the trail into the woods, cars broken into, etc. Obviously, we didn't go. The park was lovely but we didn't want to take the risks.

And I found a bunch of pictures of Rankin Lake Park on tripadvisor, if you want to get an idea of the place: Wow, awesome park - Review of Rankin Lake Park, Gastonia, NC - TripAdvisor

 

[Amonet]

I think LE used a lot of similar methods when searching for little Joe Clyde Daniels, and I'm not sure if he was totally non-verbal at home?

I vaguely recall that in the search for little Joe they used things like recordings of his parents voices and played songs that he liked in an attempt to try and get him curious about a safe sound that he might move towards rather than away from.

So I think these are likely techniques that LE is trying to develop for children with conditions like autism spectrum, and it doesn't really tell us anything more than that. Whatever has happened to a missing child, LE tend to run multiple lines of investigative inquiry at the same time, and searching the last known/reported location is just one of those lines of inquiry. They might also be looking into local sex offenders, and unfortunately they'll also likely investigate the home situation just out of an abundance of caution. So there'll be a lot going on behind the scenes, it's almost never 'just' the visible searchers.