MD MD - Judith 'Judy' O'Donnell, 19, Baltimore, 30 Nov 1980

Daughter and two sons! :) bitofhope


A good friend was mowed down by a drunk driver when I was 15, and 4 months before my first child was born, my former sister in law's nephew and friend were mowed down. Both by drunk drivers. It's possible she sold the ticket for cash before she ever boarded. It's possible she made it back to NYC. It's all possible -- and the reason I have been so far down so many rabbit holes. My parents checked local morgues often before electronic stuff became available, and a relative of my dad's was working the interpol stuff. I have worked with the us marshal service And several local PD along the journey. It has been gut wrenching.

Wonderful to hear you have two sons also. I lost a friend killed by a drunken driver when he was fixing his bike on the roadside. The father of one of my neighborhood friends did it and he had to go to jail for 9 month. Cheap for a human life...it was a horrific situation for everybody. Those are things you'll never forget. And on top of that your sister disappears. Life hasn't been that good for you in certain areas, but I'm very happy you have a nice family of your own.

I was thinking that too about her selling the tickets and go hitchhiking instead. She could have gone anywhere. I understood she didn't really had her own place in NYC, so no obligations persé and no belongings to go back there. Did you ever hear something about friends she had in other places, maybe people she had contact with from your hometown? Without money she could have reached out to one of them. Did somebody from "the old days" ever reached out to you? If she was hit by a car, you would think her body would have been found by know. But America is big and there is lot of rural land....
 
So I created a web with three epicenters. I chose Philly as one because if the bus did stop (idk the route or bus line), it would have stopped in the middle or shortly after depature. I have taken the Greyhound here and they stop about 40 mins after the bus departs around dinner time to eat and smoke, they do the same on the way back. The route I took is around 2-3 hours as well. Back then they might have stopped later than sooner. Atlantic city is not far off the route and the border isn't as close, but it's still a hop and a skip away. Has there been any efforts to connect with the Royal Canadian Mounted Police?
 

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So I created a web with three epicenters. I chose Philly as one because if the bus did stop (idk the route or bus line), it would have stopped in the middle or shortly after depature. I have taken the Greyhound here and they stop about 40 mins after the bus departs around dinner time to eat and smoke, they do the same on the way back. The route I took is around 2-3 hours as well. Back then they might have stopped later than sooner. Atlantic city is not far off the route and the border isn't as close, but it's still a hop and a skip away. Has there been any efforts to connect with the Royal Canadian Mounted Police?
Yes, I worked with the rcmp on a separate case in the western part of the country, her case is known to them. Additionally, there was a case on qe 401, the hwy 81 becomes when it crosses into ontario, it wasn't Judy. That was when I was 17; my mom was on sabbatical in Texas, I was a freshman in college, taking care of my father and brother. We were planning a memorial for her, then that doe's denrals didn't match.

My parents were relieved at the beginning. There were hundreds of dollars of phone bills (they didn't save them ???????). There were occasional calls at the beginning. But everything stopped. Like at the beginning she wanted to disappear. And frankly, at the beginning, I wouldn't have blamed her for feeling that way.

My parents had a pulse on the morgues and does up and down the east coast for the first several years, but the case went cold. And now it's arctic.
 
I should likely disclose: I know the areas well. I live in the philly suburbs, lived here 20 years ago too. Lived in md not far from rte 95 for 2 years, and worked in midtown west (nyc) for a few years. Still have family in NYC, Maryland, and upstate ny. Have been on 81 full length and 95 full length, as well as several road trips coast to coast. To put a search party out for Judy with so many variables would be impossible. That's why I have relied on uid & local pd, as well as reaching out to the us marshal service to find out if she was in protective custody, going public on chopped & long island press story, casting a wide net.
 
I should likely disclose: I know the areas well. I live in the philly suburbs, lived here 20 years ago too. Lived in md not far from rte 95 for 2 years, and worked in midtown west (nyc) for a few years. Still have family in NYC, Maryland, and upstate ny. Have been on 81 full length and 95 full length, as well as several road trips coast to coast. To put a search party out for Judy with so many variables would be impossible. That's why I have relied on uid & local pd, as well as reaching out to the us marshal service to find out if she was in protective custody, going public on chopped & long island press story, casting a wide net.
Sorry for my ignorance and if I am pressing too much, there just really is nothing in terms of details I could find. I am truly empathetic for all the stuff you have had to endure over this situation and will do all I can (even if it isn't much) to help.
 
Sorry for my ignorance and if I am pressing too much, there just really is nothing in terms of details I could find. I am truly empathetic for all the stuff you have had to endure over this situation and will do all I can (even if it isn't much) to help.
It's not ignorance. I appreciate your willingness to help, truly. By the same token, I don't want to see you spinning your wheels. <3. You would have no way of knowing my geography or specific cases I have "worked" I do wonder why this was moved & merged from the cold case thread. That irks me. I want to keep looking because, frankly, if in fact she is alive, she is entitled to inheritance!
 
It's not ignorance. I appreciate your willingness to help, truly. By the same token, I don't want to see you spinning your wheels. <3. You would have no way of knowing my geography or specific cases I have "worked" I do wonder why this was moved & merged from the cold case thread. That irks me. I want to keep looking because, frankly, if in fact she is alive, she is entitled to inheritance!

Hi Maureen, I know a lot of people from rich family's who don't want money from their deceased family, for all sorts of reasons. If Judy is still alive, she can find you and all you posted. I can't imagine that she is not wanting to meet you if she knows you are searching for her....but sometimes the past is to painful, better to leave it alone (talking about Judy's perspective) and money is just money.
 
Hi Maureen, I know a lot of people from rich family's who don't want money from their deceased family, for all sorts of reasons. If Judy is still alive, she can find you and all you posted. I can't imagine that she is not wanting to meet you if she knows you are searching for her....but sometimes the past is to painful, better to leave it alone (talking about Judy's perspective) and money is just money.
Maybe. But she and I always had a special relationship. I was her kid sister. The reason I have been *so public* and easily found is so she can reach me. If you search her, you will find me. If you search me, you find her. Now that the priests have been outed and defrocked, mom and dad, aunt Carol and uncle bill, all of her gparents are dead, I can't imagine her not wanting to reach out if she is alive. That likely sounds incredibly self absorbed , but I'm telling you, it was special between us.
 
Maybe. But she and I always had a special relationship. I was her kid sister. The reason I have been *so public* and easily found is so she can reach me. If you search her, you will find me. If you search me, you find her. Now that the priests have been outed and defrocked, mom and dad, aunt Carol and uncle bill, all of her gparents are dead, I can't imagine her not wanting to reach out if she is alive. That likely sounds incredibly self absorbed , but I'm telling you, it was special between us.

No not at all....I really think she would have reached out for you after all this years. If she is still alive, for me, it's almost impossible to think she wouldn't.....I think she is no longer amongst us....sorry Maureen....I really hoping with you that one day.....Looking at my family and spouses and friends...one day somebody would say....isn't it time to contact your sister....she is so lost without you....and you without her....and it would be a big "push"..... I can't tell you everything about myself but if she is still around there would be a time for getting in peace with your past, forgiveness ... I really hope this day is coming.
 
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Maureen
... I was having a conversation earlier, and was reminded of comments you have written and their importance to sketching out where you have been with your search. The conversation was about how many family members - myself included - have talked about having thoughts and feelings, intuition and experiences, that validate a belief, in whether or not their missing loved one is living ... In earlier posts you expressed your thoughts about Judy having returned to NY Nov 1980, being last sighted January 1981 and having died sometime later, maybe 3 years ... If possible, I'd like to know if there has been a shift in thinking ... and if you feel they are important markers along the way. Thanks.
 
Maureen
... I was having a conversation earlier, and was reminded of comments you have written and their importance to sketching out where you have been with your search. The conversation was about how many family members - myself included - have talked about having thoughts and feelings, intuition and experiences, that validate a belief, in whether or not their missing loved one is living ... In earlier posts you expressed your thoughts about Judy having returned to NY Nov 1980, being last sighted January 1981 and having died sometime later, maybe 3 years ... If possible, I'd like to know if there has been a shift in thinking ... and if you feel they are important markers along the way. Thanks.
Janiss, the last time I personally saw her in person, was Nov 30th 1980. She was on the TV the night of Jan 19, 1981 (might have been the night before the inauguration, the 18th). Other family members have claimed they saw her a couple of years later, in east Brunswick, nj. But they were hesitant to share the info (cue wtf). I know the hurt she felt. I know the shame my parents felt. Our family has never been the same. When I was working on the midtown doe angle, my mother was PISSED at me for including her maiden name, mcgrorty-- again, why? Seriously, why would.you be angry? Your daughter is missing. And she made bad choices. Her choices, not yours. Meh
I am whining.

I have vacillated on whether I think she is dead or alive - I am mostly on the she's dead side, no idea when, where, or how. That's why I have been down so many rabbit holes trying to find her so she can finally be laid to rest. Knowing her lifestyle, there's little chance she made it much more than a year. She always came home for money or charging phone calls to my parents number.

She told my dad at their last goodbye, that she recognized she screwed up and that she wanted to come home to finish her GED
 
  • Judith Erin O’Donnell – The Charley Project
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    • Missing Since 11/30/1980
    • Missing From Baltimore, Maryland
    • Classification Endangered Missing
    • Date of Birth 04/28/1961 (58)
    • Age 19 years old
    • Height and Weight 5'10, 140 pounds
    • Distinguishing Characteristics Caucasian female. Brown hair, blue eyes. O'Donnell has scars under her chin and on her left arm. She has had a tonsillectomy and her adenoids have been removed. O'Donnell may use the aliases Judith Tuffy and/or Tuffy O'Donnell.
 
Janiss, the last time I personally saw her in person, was Nov 30th 1980. She was on the TV the night of Jan 19, 1981 (might have been the night before the inauguration, the 18th). Other family members have claimed they saw her a couple of years later, in east Brunswick, nj. But they were hesitant to share the info (cue wtf). I know the hurt she felt. I know the shame my parents felt. Our family has never been the same. When I was working on the midtown doe angle, my mother was PISSED at me for including her maiden name, mcgrorty-- again, why? Seriously, why would.you be angry? Your daughter is missing. And she made bad choices. Her choices, not yours. Meh
I am whining.

I have vacillated on whether I think she is dead or alive - I am mostly on the she's dead side, no idea when, where, or how. That's why I have been down so many rabbit holes trying to find her so she can finally be laid to rest. Knowing her lifestyle, there's little chance she made it much more than a year. She always came home for money or charging phone calls to my parents number.

She told my dad at their last goodbye, that she recognized she screwed up and that she wanted to come home to finish her GED


Thanks, this is helping me understand. Glad you added about Judy wanting to further her education and make a better life for herself ... such a positive indication of being able to make better choices and in some ways may even reflect Judy having found a way to begin resolving some of her traumas. Take Care.
 
So I created a web with three epicenters. I chose Philly as one because if the bus did stop (idk the route or bus line), it would have stopped in the middle or shortly after depature. I have taken the Greyhound here and they stop about 40 mins after the bus departs around dinner time to eat and smoke, they do the same on the way back. The route I took is around 2-3 hours as well. Back then they might have stopped later than sooner. Atlantic city is not far off the route and the border isn't as close, but it's still a hop and a skip away. Has there been any efforts to connect with the Royal Canadian Mounted Police?

Beginning in Baltimore ... in 1980, I'm thinking the the downtown bus station was on Fayette St ... true?
 

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