BBM
I am touched by these past few posts between you and
@Love Never Fails .
I just wanted to speak to the desire you have each expressed about prevention.
I've shared a very small bit of my dysfunctional childhood on here. Today I'm a healthy, mature adult with struggles... But we all have struggles, so I'm no different in that regard.
I was emotionally and psychologically abused (words from a professional, not my own), as well as a little bit abused physically and possibly even sexually (subtly, not outright).
I've never murdered anyone. I have faith in God, a good husband, the best ever kids, and I'm a damn good mother. I delved deep into some painful things in order to grow into who I am now. And I'm honest about it. I try to help others from similar backgrounds.
My mother, my abuser, and my father, her enabler, have never murdered anyone ( to my knowledge
).
So, after all my prior talk about compassion and the need for understanding how people are shaped by their childhoods, I just want to say
personal accountability is key.
There but for the grace of God, go I.
I think, given the right circumstances, any person is capable of murder. We don't want that to be true; we'd like a gap between "us" and "them". but the capacity for evil in the human mind/soul, is matched only by its capacity for greatness.
A person has to want to be "fixed". And that desire to be "fixed" is really just the desire to be better than we currently are. I don't think that desire is fired up in anyone simply by showing compassion and friendship to the depressed, suicidal, murderous individual. Your friend so sadly found this out.
Maybe it's done by showing them what they could be... hold up
hope for them to take a good look at. Put goodness and beauty out into the world. Appeal to the good in people, even if there's only a tiny bit there, make them want to be a hero. Shine your light. Encourage them to see how great they can be, to not be "just human," but to be
fully human.
I dunno. I'm just rambling here, but those are my thoughts.