MO MO - Betty Alexander, 69, Sullivan, 11 April 2019

[Bit of hope]

Is that in a post or a comment at that link? Sorry, I'm still not seeing it. Oh well.

Perhaps if her other family thinks she wandered off and got lost, they should launch a search to find her? They could get together a group of volunteers and, with the help of local police, scouts, etc. go searching for her again.

It's the Facebook missing page of the brothers and families, an official statement (post) of the Schoonveld families about how their view is on all of this. My quote is in there. It would be wonderful if the family could reconcile and search for Betty together.

 

[Betty P]

It's the Facebook missing page of the brothers and families, an official statement (post) of the Schoonveld families about how their view is on all of this. My quote is in there. It would be wonderful if the family could reconcile and search for Betty together.

Thanks. I have a feeling it's content that can only be seen if you follow or join the page, which I haven't done. That probably explains it.

 

[Cubby]

A few things. That $200, was it in 20s, 50s, or $100 bill? Because if it was in 20s she could’ve been saving it a little bit at a time.

Tonya the daughter, seemed to feel something wasn’t kosher about the brother and his wife breaking into the apartment and moving everything out before all investigations were completed.

This church she went to you and Sunday, was it within walking distance?

I don’t believe for one minute that it was a suicide, the body would’ve been found because she wouldn’t of been too far from home as to her inability to walk far.

That’s all I’ve got right now. All this is IMO, JMO

According to the brothers statement the authorities completed their investigation of the apartment before it as released for access.

Did you read the brothers statement?

 

[Cubby]

Dbm. Duplicate post.

 

[Cubby]

Dbm

 

[Bit of hope]

Thanks. I have a feeling it's content that can only be seen if you follow or join the page, which I haven't done. That probably explains it.

I did sent you a pm

 

[Cubby]

It's there:
We as family know Betty. She did have dementia, and her diagnosis, we don’t fully know how severe because once a patient loses their spouse, they are known to decline rapidly. At the initial search on Monday, April 15th, the police said that Betty had an episode at the hospital banging on the window because she couldn’t find her way out after a doctor visit. Betty had a history of bi-polar disorder. She had a history of visits to New Hope, and other psych wards, to level her out.

Here is some information on New Hope
Behavioral Health Services Missouri Baptist Hospital | Sullivan, Missouri

Until police rule out an accident or self harm, we need to look at all possibilities. No stone left unturned.

I wonder how long before the disappearance Betty had the incident at the hospital the police mentioned. I tend to agree about a rapid decline after losing a spouse. Especially after reading the msm link about Betty's husband posted upthread.

 

[bombardier]

wish there was more information about that still-unconfirmed sighting of Betty standing in the road near the firehouse, looking confused, I believe the day after she was last seen. If this is a 'true' sighting, it really points my opinion in the direction of no foul-play (all MOO).
Also, I'm always wary of when family say that the dementia wasn't advanced but other people say otherwise (i.e. in post #278 apparently she had gotten lost in a doctors office?). It's hard to admit when a mum or dad is declining. I work with people with dementia and they can seem very cognitive when in their typical controlled environment but are utterly lost in other situations.

 

[Laughing]

concerning to me that the 2 adult sibs have made differing statements about LE release of Betty's apartment and about the rent.

That with the other relative moving across the court into the apartment is beyond weird.

JMHO YMMV LRR

 

[Seajay]

concerning to me that the 2 adult sibs have made differing statements about LE release of Betty's apartment and about the rent.

That with the other relative moving across the court into the apartment is beyond weird.

JMHO YMMV LRR

Exactly! Weird.

Brother and his family had to break the locks, why did he do that? Why didn’t he ask the sister for the key? This leads me to believe either they were fighting and she couldn’t give him the key or he went in there behind her back.

And if it’s rent controlled and all that, and the uncle already had a place to live there in another apartment, why was he moved into that apartment?

Something stinks here. She would not have left her glasses. Who closed and locked her door between the time MOW was there and Tonya went there? The brother? He seems to be a wild card. Visits wife’s uncle but not his mother. Grabs the apartment for wife’s uncle ASAP. IMO

 

[Bit of hope]

I would love to know the official statements by LE or to read the police report, apart from information presented over Facebook and media, initiated by family members. I can't read the articles posted in the first pages, but I think this are only cries to the public by LE, warning people to look out for her, trying to find her, not the facts represented. Or am I wrong?

 

[Cubby]

Where is the link indicating the brother had to "break the locks" to get into Betty's apartment? That's hearsay. Maybe Betty gave a key to her son that her daughter didn't know about. Or, the apartment manager let him in with a master key.

I can't tell you the number of things my mom tells me, or gives me, and tells me not to tell so and so......... it's ongoing because I have one sibling who thinks it's OK to attempt to micromanage everyone's life. Maybe Betty felt pressured and didn't have the emotional energy to say no to her daughter and said something else to her son.

As for the uncle moving into her apartment. Maybe his apartment was noisier because it was closer to the street, maybe it was too close to the dumpster, maybe Betty had a better view or better yard area behind her apartment. He moved from one building to another building in the same complex. I don't find that odd.

Maybe daughter is upset she didn't recognize her mom's decline, or that she did or didn't do something else.... so it just becomes easier to discount the more painful possibilities to blame someone or something else.

 

[PayrollNerd]

Has it been confirmed Betty only had one pair of glasses?

I don't recall that being confirmed but it sure sounded like it. She has/had very little resources from all the things I've read. My thought would be she only had one pair due to the cost. If she had vision coverage as part of her Medicare, then perhaps, but I highly doubt it.

 

[PayrollNerd]

I think it depends on the prescription. Was she blind without her glasses or did she "just" have a blurry view without them? I need glasses too and my view without them is blurry and distorted, but I can distinguish things and people. Can't see faces sharp and can't read small letters, but bigger city signs? Also when your vision is (partly) gone you often compensate that with other senses.

ATA Seeing height and seeing depth could be a problem too. FI estimating how far a car is away from you.

It does and I agree, perhaps it was a prescription that she could wander around the house and be fine. However, if she left to unfamiliar places or attempted stairs or uneven ground, then she'd need them. I remember dementia patients in the nursing home I worked at years ago being afraid of a dark piece of ground. The floor entrance to each elevator on the unit was painted black. If a patient ventured toward an elevator, they'd be less likely to board the elevator (plus they didn't have a key) and they'd turn around.

 

[PayrollNerd]

Could she have taken public transport? I don't know how severe her back problems were, I'm not a medical specialist. Did she use a walker? Could she be so determent she "went through the pain"? Some people can produce a enormous psychological strength when things are not going the way they want. Or the pain was softened by the use of fentanyl. Just exploring some options.

I also wondered about this: Betty had a history of back pain and wasn’t comfortable sitting for long periods. Tonya and her Mother decided they would see each other that Sunday, after church, for an afternoon of shopping.

Betty Alexander – Missing from Sullivan MO – 4/10/2019. Who Abducted Betty? Why Isn’t Her Abduction Receiving Attention? This Grandmother Deserves to Come Home.

Shopping seems to me very exhausting if you have problems with mobility. Could it be her walking wasn't that bad. Or did she use a wheelchair?

It is possible they anticipated using a motorized scooter, rent one at the mall, use one at the grocery store, etc. That is what I did on the days I actually had a lot of shopping to get done, well pre-Covid-19 era! Your energy is good initially but at the end, the fatigue does you in. Check out lines are sometimes the last straw.

 

[PayrollNerd]

Betty’s purse was in the closet where she always kept it when in the home. It contained her apartment key, an ATM card, around $40 in cash tucked into her wallet, her typical spending money. But the wallet also contained an additional and mysterious $200. There were two envelopes in Betty’s wallet. Each envelope contained $100 in cash.

How did Betty obtain the two envelopes containing the $200? Betty did not withdraw the cash. In fact, Tonya managed her Mother’s bank account after her Step-Father passed away. She held the checkbook and paid Betty’s bills. Betty had her debit card for purchases and the $40 cash if needed. Her bank account has not been accessed.

Could she have had another account, not known to her daughter? Could she have lend the money from someone for future plans or maybe someone give it to her, feeling sorry for her she didn't had access to her own account for cash and only the 40 dollar pocket money. Or maybe she had it all along and hid it from her daughter.

On the other hand why would she have left it at home if she went away willingly (and clear enough) and what about the missing Fentanyl patches. Somehow something is odd about this all. Or in other words I don't have a logical explanation for it yet.

I highly doubt she had a separate account. When a person is in a nursing home (which the 2 son's state she was for 3 years on their FB page for Betty), the patient gets a minimal amount each month and the balance of the SS check goes to their bill. Betty would have been used to having / needing very little cash after 3 years. Anything she wanted that she couldn't afford, it sounds like her children provided. To qualify for the subsidized housing, she wouldn't have been able to have assets over a certain limit. They'd pull up her info based on her SSN and it would show what is under her name. Yes indeed, this is very odd.

 

[PayrollNerd]

Thanks!

I read through all of that and still didn't see a mention of her having bi-polar disorder, only that she was in the early stages of dementia. For now I'm going to assume that information is inaccurate as I've never seen it anywhere else. No offense.

You have to expand the Oct 6, 2019 post to see the entire thing. It's a long post.

 

[PayrollNerd]

I would love to know the official statements by LE or to read the police report, apart from information presented over Facebook and media, initiated by family members. I can't read the articles posted in the first pages, but I think this are only cries to the public by LE, warning people to look out for her, trying to find her, not the facts represented. Or am I wrong?

I remember on the Bring Betty Home FB page initially there were comments between the siblings, including their spouses, that were eventually removed. There was definitely some disagreement on the approach, the resources, the timeline, the locks, etc. Now that the comments have been removed, obviously I can't link them. However, just take it as my opinion to stay within the TOS.

I wasn't aware the brothers had created a page so whomever linked that, thank you. I'm surprised it did not show up in my research last summer. Anyway, it was an interesting read. I would be curious to compare notes between the two private investigators. Maybe I'm misunderstanding but it sounds like the daughter hired one and the 2 sons hired a different one. LE must be so overwhelmed and/or distracted with the family drama. I'm sure the case notes are quite lengthy at this point as a result. JMO

 

[Cubby]

I don't recall that being confirmed but it sure sounded like it. She has/had very little resources from all the things I've read. My thought would be she only had one pair due to the cost. If she had vision coverage as part of her Medicare, then perhaps, but I highly doubt it.

She probably had both Medicare and Medicaid if she was low income. Medicaid covers the 20% medicare doesn't cover. The Lions club gives away free glasses. She was a member of a church, or at least attended church regularly. I'm sure she had access to resources or people who knew how to help access resources. Iirc, medicare will pay for an eye exam and glasses every two years.

 

[Bit of hope]

It does and I agree, perhaps it was a prescription that she could wander around the house and be fine. However, if she left to unfamiliar places or attempted stairs or uneven ground, then she'd need them. I remember dementia patients in the nursing home I worked at years ago being afraid of a dark piece of ground. The floor entrance to each elevator on the unit was painted black. If a patient ventured toward an elevator, they'd be less likely to board the elevator (plus they didn't have a key) and they'd turn around.

Thanks. I didn't know that about the elevator/black piece of ground. Interesting.