I wonder whether JL was ever truly planning to leave his wife and family for Suzanne.
I think she was very vulnerable, and he exploited it. If I recall correctly, there was a party for Suzanne in Indiana prior to the move...and JL showed up. I would speculate that conversation and nostalgia were stirred up at that point in time. He may have had puppy love feelings for Suzanne...but this was a fantasy relationship...built on deceit and "escapism". He used her....and liked what he was using. But after each get together (all 6)...he went home and rejoined his "gang" as if nothing happened. Hard to tell how long this would have continued, had Suzanne not disappeared...but, I would speculate that Suzanne would have eventually popped an ultimatum on Jeff....or simply ended it on her own when she realized she was chasing a rabbit. I can't help but think that Suzanne was left with some bitterness over her fight with cancer...and Barry's lack of emotional support and understanding. She fell out of love with Barry...and was trapped. Those two components were not lost on JL...they were his ticket to Suzanne's affections.
I have known a few coworkers who have had what I call a “convention boyfriend.” The only time they meet is when the married boyfriend is out of town, at a convention or other work-related business travel.
I hope his wife asking him these same questions
Maybe Suzanne knew she was a “convention girlfriend”. It’s possible. She was very isolated, and she picked a guy that wasn’t looking for a wife-she could have the exciting fun stuff, without the daily drudgery. She could video chat naked and have stimulating intelligent conversations while her workaholic husband was not at home-which was often. Fantasy life vs real life. The escape to Ecuador and getting married could have been part of dreamy pillow talk but not grounded in reality. Suzanne was barely out of her teens when she married. She might have been chasing what she missed out on. I am not here to judge whether she was being a bad wife or if Barry drove her to it. My focus is on Barry killing Suzanne. The DV component relates to her murder, not why she hooked up with JL. You are not entitled to kill a cheating wife. If this case becomes too much about cheating Suzanne and hurt Barry, Suzanne’s murder gets lost.
Great post I think your absolutely right on. My first husband was a very abusive, workaholic, jealous businessman, I always had a bruise to coverup somewhere. The last thing I would have done is risk having a BF even though I had many opportunities to do so. I had no doubt if I got caught he would explode and kill me. Suzanne had to know she was playing with fire but I guess to her it was worth the risk. Too bad it wasn’t with a guy who truly loved and cared for her to help get her out of that life. That JL was a coward. If I were his wife I would take my kids and get as far away from him as I could.
Just wanted to say @justtrish that I thought this was a very good post. Very well said! I think Suzanne was “beaten down” by Barry emotionally & mentally over the years culminating with a period of some physical violence towards the end but it’s all abuse!
If JL was worried about Suzanne and he really loved her he would have called the police. Period. There is no excuse! When he couldn’t reach her and then he saw the news reports that she was “missing” and her bike was found etc. that is the point where a decent man would realize it’s time to come clean to my wife and talk to LE immediately. Or he could have gone to Colorado and knocked on her door and confronted Barry himself. This is a more dangerous option but if he didn’t want LE or his wife to find out but his soulmate and future “wife” was missing you would think he would want to talk to Barry man to man and look him in the eye. Maybe at first he thought Suzanne ran away from Barry but after a few days and she didn’t contact him and when he heard the news coverage about the bogus bike ride he had to suspect the worst. And if he was actually on the phone with Suzanne and heard something like Barry yelling at her or she screamed or he heard a struggle taking place and he just hung up and started deleting stuff then he is not just a coward but he also suppressed evidence and gave Barry a chance to hide Suzanne’s body and set up the bike ride and job alibi trip. If he heard something or suspected Suzanne was in danger and he called LE right away they literally could have caught Barry in the act with her body. All just MOO but I have no respect for JL. I do hope we get to hear from him at Barry’s trial and I hope he regrets his actions or non action and it haunts him…if he ever truly loved Suzanne which I have my doubts about. And if he was my husband I would not only be devastated by the long term affair and betrayal but I would be just as disgusted with him for not doing the right thing. I feel very sorry for his wife and SIX children whose lives were blown up over this too. MOO
I’m sure he was scared of Barry and he should be but if JL called the police right away there is no way Barry would have come for him. No way would he risk it if he knew JL talked to the Sheriff already and told him about the affair. JMOO
Great post.
If my husband did this, there would be war. In moo you better believe it is an affair.
BAM. Yes, I'm guessing the holiday season may not be so festive at the JL residence this year.
I’ve been thinking about those 5/9 texts between Barry & Suzanne. They seem kind of weird. Especially the text asking Suzanne if she wanted to go on a hike. She replied “where?” And then he never answered until later when Suzanne brought it up again. Why did he not answer her about where he wanted to hike or ask her where she would like to go? And then when she asked if he wanted to meet up and hike he curtly replied no he was coming home. Why did he change his mind? I still think he was spying on her and somehow he could see her messages and photo she sent to JL. But why did he tell her he was coming home if he wanted to sneak up on her?
I agree with your post. IMO, JL knew right away that something happened to Suzanne. He also had to strongly suspect that her husband murdered her when it was announced that she "disappeared."
If this situation occurred with my wife, my life as I know it would be over. She also has three sisters that could be rotated in and out on a tag team basis. (((shudder))).
