GUILTY MO - Tyler Dasher, 1, Affton, 15 Nov 2011 - #1

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My oldest is 16 I was just 21 when I had her... I learned as I went along without a mother in my life to help guide me. There's no excuse IMO for any child to be murdered...

Thank you. I'm another young mother who had no mother. I nurtured my kids, I finished school, and now I'm going working on grad school. We ALL have choices.

I know that nobody is implying it's an excuse, but IMO it's not even a factor. It's not even relevant. Correlation does not equal causation. Women who don't think ahead to the consequences of sex and pregnancy, they may be more likely to abuse because they are treating life like a game- but that doesn't mean their age is the reason they are more likely to abuse.
 
Asked why he was charging Dasher with second-degree murder, not first-degree murder, McCulloch cited the lack of deliberation.

"It's the difference between hot-blooded and cold-blooded murder," he said.

McCulloch said the lesson for the community was, "Raising a child can be frustrating. There are a myriad of ways to deal with that. This isn't one of them."


http://abcnews.go.com/US/dead-toddl...told-cops-beat/story?id=14966236#.TsRVdXFGz5I

Appears that Mom simply pitched the biggest fit of her 20 years.
 
TorisMom, Hi.
After watching the 2nd video of the friend-cousin that was interviewed yesterday-my dh said the young lady was too sure of herself-looked into the camera trying to make people think shelby was a perfect mom. IDK, I'm guessing these young people knew shelby was a drug user. :waitasec:
I like you want to know if grandma tried to get her daughter help. If not that in and of itself is neglect in my mind.

Her best friends touting about what a good mother she is, are probably her "party" buddies.
 
Thank you. I'm another young mother who had no mother. I nurtured my kids, I finished school, and now I'm going working on grad school. We ALL have choices.

I know that nobody is implying it's an excuse, but IMO it's not even a factor. It's not even relevant. Correlation does not equal causation. Women who don't think ahead to the consequences of sex and pregnancy, they may be more likely to abuse because they are treating life like a game- but that doesn't mean their age is the reason they are more likely to abuse.

I'm also thinking that just because shelbys mom lived in the same home dosnt mean she could be a good support for her/tyler either.. Don't get me wrong, shame on shelby!! but who knows what went on behind doors?? I think people will really start talking soon and we may not like it...
 
What keeps stunning me, is little Tyler was not just refusing to lay down for a sleep, it was time for him to get up! The only one who hadn't had enough sleep was that cranky mother. And I remember when I had young ones, very consciously knowing I would pay the piper for staying up or out late-- I used to say it was like volunteering for the flu, I'd feel like carp, need a nap, things would be slow, but I'd be doing the baby's/toddler's/child's routine nonetheless. It's the price you pay, not a surprise!

I wonder if this Shelby had some aggression toward her own mother, as well. What a horrid, horrid, situation. :mad:

Exactly, Quiche! To say the least, "real" mothers put their chilldren's well-being BEFORE their own social life! IMHO, SD only used this baby for attention from her friends. As the excitement faded, and the baby required more of her attention...his basic needs became a burden on her. I am furious with that , and with the "friends" who are more concerned about her, than the innocent angel she brutally killed...and tossed away like trash!
 
I'm also thinking that just because shelbys mom lived in the same home dosnt mean she could be a good support for her/tyler either.. Don't get me wrong, shame on shelby!! but who knows what went on behind doors?? I think people will really start talking soon and we may not like it...

JMO...
Grandma was the one that was there to tuck Tyler in for a good night sleep...where was mom...out partyin' it up! I feel that Grandma was a good support for the 2 of them.

From SAD's actions I feel that Grandma must have looked after the toddler alot of the time. G'ma went off to work and poor Shelby had to tend to her "own" child, she couldn't handle it, went bazurk and we have a murder on our hands. If G'ma was there, Shelby most likely would have gotten her beauty sleep while G'ma took over the mom role.
 
My oldest is 16 I was just 21 when I had her... I learned as I went along without a mother in my life to help guide me. There's no excuse IMO for any child to be murdered...

I agree - I feel age is not a factor. What you wrote that I highlighted says it all!
 
Whether Grandma was a good or bad support system/role model/influence is moot in my opinion. There are scores upon scores of young women who are impoverished, lack education, come from abusive backgrounds, and grow up in less than ideal circumstances who become wonderful, loving, attentive parents and do not beat their babies to death.

Shelby could be the daughter of the most abusive, drug-addled, negligent mother herself and it still would do nothing to diminish her culpability in her own child's murder. JMO
 
Well, i am taking a break from WS. Have already seen enough bad stuff in my profession to last me a lifetime. So just need a little break from this. You guys are really really great. Sleuth on! Gonna spend any extra time i would be on here with my infant. :heartbeat:

And one quick note to Tyler:
Ha! Tyler, bet you are looking down wondering why all these big people are crying about you while you are up there playing and jumping and probably throwing stuff. Big people are hard to understand, you were perfect when you were where we are at. Gonna try hard to make it to the really fun cool place you are at. Enjoy having all you want with no poopy diapers, and no scary big people, AND NO BEDTIME! YAY!!! See you soon, love. :baby:
 
Working on a new thread, will be closing this one in a few...
 
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