For love or money?

NCBanker

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I'm posting this for the benefit of all you talented sleuthers. This was published recently in a local LDS lifestyle newspaper in San Diego, CA, a place Raven lived as a youth. This newspaper is not an official publication of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There will be differing opinions about this, so please feel free to express! There have been several who thought Raven's family was exploiting this tragedy by setting up a fund in Utah. I personally think doing this was completely innocent in design. People do this in lieu of sending flowers quite frequently. Remember, they had been out of work and on hard times. Yes, they were putting the pieces back together, but things were still tight. I'm sure Raven's family understood this. From this article, it appears that his family in Arizona set up the fund, NOT his mother in Utah. Remember that Raven lived most of his childhood in Utah, so the bulk of any donations would most likely come from people who knew him there.

Granted, we all think Raven did this horrible thing, but I think the fund was set up in good faith by family members who genuinely care about the welfare of Kaiden. Remember, Janet is the one who died, not Kaiden. That's why the fund is set up in HER name, for HER memory. Though Raven may be guilty, his family shouldn't automatically be assumed guilty by association. This may have been an innocent act of kindness. Regardless, please post your thoughts...

The San Diego Seagull
July 2005 Vol. 25, No. 2


Wife of former San Diegan is murdered in her home in Durham, North Carolina
Raven Abaroa, age 25, is a former member of several wards in the San Diego area. Most recently he lived in the Grossmont Ward, Santee Stake, before moving to Utah with his family in 1993.

About five years ago he married Janet Christiansen in the Washington, D.C. Temple. They settled in Durham, North Carolina.

Raven arrived home on April 26 after playing in a soccer game. He found his six-month-old son Kaiden asleep in his bed where he had left him and soon after discovered his wife Janet, also 25, stabbed to death in an office in their home. Police are still investigating the crime.

The Abaroas met while playing soccer at Southern Virginia University, where Janet was an All-American in soccer. She helped lead her team to back-to-back National Small College Athletic Association championship victories in 1998 and 1999. She was a member of the Presidents Honor Roll with a 4.0 GPA.

Raven is the son of Karyn Abaroa-Bolton and the grandson of Robbie Abaroa. Robbie is a long-time resident of the San Diego area and currently in the Chula Vista Stake 2nd Ward.

Funeral services were held for Janet on May 7 at the LDS State Center in Buena Vista, Virginia and burial was in Pennsylvania. A memorial service was later held in her hometown of Annandale, Virginia.

Robbie said Church members and the Relief Societies of each area were extremely thoughtful and caring in helping the family, providing food and help in numerous ways.

Kaiden is now being cared for by his father and other relatives.

A memorial fund set up for Kaiden

A cousin of Raven’s, Deena Peterson Thorpe and her husband Jeff, of Mesa, Arizona felt they wanted to do something more helpful and enduring for the family. Deena said, "When we first heard about Janet’s death, our family felt that we needed to do something more than just send a sympathy card."

After deliberations and some fundraising efforts by the Thorpes, a memorial fund was set up for Kaiden.

Anyone wishing to make a donation may mail to:

Janet Abaroa Memorial Fund
I.B.E.W. Federal Credit Union
2405 West 1987 South
Salt Lake City, UT 94104
Deena’s husband Jeff explained to the Seagull how the memorial fund began.

"My wife and I talked about what would be appropriate and decided that I would ask my boss if I could start a collection from co-workers and friends at the hospital to send to a memorial fund. My boss felt that it was a wonderful idea, so I started talking to as many people as I could.

"Our daughters, Lexus, 9, Bethan, 6, and Sidney, 4, saw what I was doing at work and approached me one day and asked if they could have a lemonade stand and send the proceeds to the memorial fund. We made the arrangements for the lemonade stand and took the girls around the neighborhood to talk to people about their fundraiser.

"We made fliers for them to hand out and had a picture of Janet, Raven and Kaiden so the girls could explain why they were doing the lemonade stand. Some people gave them donations right there on the spot. The one thing the girls always said as they explained the family’s tragedy was ‘but the little baby was okay.’

"By the time Saturday came around we had decided that the girls would sell lemonade, cherry lemonade, lemon slushies, cherry-lemon slushies and triple chocolate brownies (which were a huge hit). We had large signs to get people’s attention and set up the table and money booth in the shade of our tree on the front lawn.

"The girls had set a goal of earning $20 to send for the fund. When all was said and done, the girls had made $230 in just four hours. From my collection at work I managed to get $980 from many very wonderful and generous people, some giving more than I knew they really could afford.

"When I would point out that a few dollars would be sufficient, the response was usually that what goes around comes around and that God would bless them for blessing others. This has been a wonderful experience for my family and has taught our girls the blessing of selflessness."

Note: Deena Thorpe is the daughter of Richard and Eva Peterson of San Diego North Stake 10th Ward. For questions or comments, Robbie Abaroa may be reached at: rabaroa@sbcglobal.net. END OF ARTICLE

Though I probably don't have to say it, let's not send any mail to the grandfather. ;)
 
I don't want to be disrespectful, and I think that it's a great idea to have a fund set up for Kaiden--to pay for college or even his LDS mission (if he chooses to do so), but--there's always a but--if Raven has access to these funds it is a crying shame. He is perfectly able to provide for himself. Now if some of the funds went to pay for Janet's funeral arrangements, that's all well and good. But if this money is being used to help bail him out of debt, buy new toys (ie the $500 cell phone golfmom had been tipped off about), pay for his lawyers, pay for his entry fees into some volleyball tournament, Raven is abusing the fund. And those who donated to it should be aware of this.

I also have some more questions:
1. Why would Arizona/California relatives set up the memorial fund in Utah?
2. Would there be a way to set up a fund specifically for Kaiden? And solely for Kaiden?
3. Who really did pay for the funeral arrangements--Janet's family or Raven?
 
Purely speculation here, but I'd assume that Janet's family paid for the funeral. If they didn't have the funds to pay for it, then the Church would step in. I highly doubt the fund is to reimburse the funeral expenses. We should find out who the administrator of the fund is.

As I mentioned previously, the fund was probably set up in Utah because that's where the bulk of his life has been spent. That's where the majority of potential donors would be. Additionally, the credit union may be based there.

Jenifred said:
I don't want to be disrespectful, and I think that it's a great idea to have a fund set up for Kaiden--to pay for college or even his LDS mission (if he chooses to do so), but--there's always a but--if Raven has access to these funds it is a crying shame. He is perfectly able to provide for himself. Now if some of the funds went to pay for Janet's funeral arrangements, that's all well and good. But if this money is being used to help bail him out of debt, buy new toys (ie the $500 cell phone golfmom had been tipped off about), pay for his lawyers, pay for his entry fees into some volleyball tournament, Raven is abusing the fund. And those who donated to it should be aware of this.

I also have some more questions:
1. Why would Arizona/California relatives set up the memorial fund in Utah?
2. Would there be a way to set up a fund specifically for Kaiden? And solely for Kaiden?
3. Who really did pay for the funeral arrangements--Janet's family or Raven?
 
NCBanker said:
We should find out who the administrator of the fund is.

This to me is the most important thing. I personally have no problem with setting up a trust fund to benefit Kaiden, at all. My only questions would have to do with the administration of the fund - who can write the checks, under what guidelines/parameters, etc. As the mailing address was a credit union in SLC (which I think is the Electician's CU, and Raven's step Dad, if I'm not mistaken, is or was an electrician???), perhaps the trust is administered by the CU? No idea, but surely that would be preferable over a family member administering the funds, as there could be an inherent conflict of interest there, at least potentially.

I wonder, too, if there legal guidelines about such a fund.

I mean the bottom line is - if the fund's purpose is to benefit Kaiden, then all funds should do just that, and nothing more. Now that said, I suppose that could range from daily things like buying diapers, to, big things like saving money for college or something. My hope would be that Raven gets a job, and takes on the responsiblity for day-to-day expenses for his son. And that monies collected in this trust would be for educational expenses or something, down the road....
 
I wanted to phone the credit union in order to find out who the administrator is, but it appears my wife is going into labor with our 3rd baby, so we're going to be heading over to the hospital in a few minutes. I'll probably be out of pocket for a few days, at least. Someone please take the liberty to contact the credit union to find out who the administrator is. You can pose as a potential donor, or even actually donate if so inclined.
 
NCBanker said:
I wanted to phone the credit union in order to find out who the administrator is, but it appears my wife is going into labor with our 3rd baby, so we're going to be heading over to the hospital in a few minutes. I'll probably be out of pocket for a few days, at least. Someone please take the liberty to contact the credit union to find out who the administrator is. You can pose as a potential donor, or even actually donate if so inclined.
How exciting!! Good luck!!
 
NCBanker said:
The San Diego Seagull
July 2005 Vol. 25, No. 2


A memorial fund set up for Kaiden

A cousin of Raven’s, Deena Peterson Thorpe and her husband Jeff, of Mesa, Arizona felt they wanted to do something more helpful and enduring for the family. Deena said, "When we first heard about Janet’s death, our family felt that we needed to do something more than just send a sympathy card."

After deliberations and some fundraising efforts by the Thorpes, a memorial fund was set up for Kaiden.

Anyone wishing to make a donation may mail to:

Janet Abaroa Memorial Fund
I.B.E.W. Federal Credit Union
2405 West 1987 South
Salt Lake City, UT 94104
Deena’s husband Jeff explained to the Seagull how the memorial fund began.

"My wife and I talked about what would be appropriate and decided that I would ask my boss if I could start a collection from co-workers and friends at the hospital to send to a memorial fund. My boss felt that it was a wonderful idea, so I started talking to as many people as I could.

"Our daughters, Lexus, 9, Bethan, 6, and Sidney, 4, saw what I was doing at work and approached me one day and asked if they could have a lemonade stand and send the proceeds to the memorial fund. We made the arrangements for the lemonade stand and took the girls around the neighborhood to talk to people about their fundraiser.

"We made fliers for them to hand out and had a picture of Janet, Raven and Kaiden so the girls could explain why they were doing the lemonade stand. Some people gave them donations right there on the spot. The one thing the girls always said as they explained the family’s tragedy was ‘but the little baby was okay.’

"By the time Saturday came around we had decided that the girls would sell lemonade, cherry lemonade, lemon slushies, cherry-lemon slushies and triple chocolate brownies (which were a huge hit). We had large signs to get people’s attention and set up the table and money booth in the shade of our tree on the front lawn.

"The girls had set a goal of earning $20 to send for the fund. When all was said and done, the girls had made $230 in just four hours. From my collection at work I managed to get $980 from many very wonderful and generous people, some giving more than I knew they really could afford.

"When I would point out that a few dollars would be sufficient, the response was usually that what goes around comes around and that God would bless them for blessing others. This has been a wonderful experience for my family and has taught our girls the blessing of selflessness."

Note: Deena Thorpe is the daughter of Richard and Eva Peterson of San Diego North Stake 10th Ward. For questions or comments, Robbie Abaroa may be reached at: rabaroa@sbcglobal.net. END OF ARTICLE

Though I probably don't have to say it, let's not send any mail to the grandfather. ;)
OK..THIS JUST REEKS OF WRONG DOING...first, of all, why wasn't the fund that Janet's family set up mentioned in the article? THAT fund gives specifics as to exactly where the money goes (was it because people could compare funds and realize that the "Janet Memorial Fund" set up in UTAH isn't specific as to where the money goes at all!!) Why was the fund set up in Utah and in Janets name? It should be in Kaiden's name IF it is for him...Does anyone know that if the fund was set up in Kaidens name, would Raven be able to get to the money? or would it just stay in the account until Kaiden was old enough to get the money?
I do think the family in AZ was kind, and just trying to help..but I think Raven and his Mom is definately trying to use connections to milk this...This whole thing just feels wrong. Am I the only one here? :mad:

I wonder how people would feel giving to the fund mentioned in the article if they knew Raven was facing embezzlement charges?
 
snapple said:
OK..THIS JUST REEKS OF WRONG DOING...first, of all, why wasn't the fund that Janet's family set up mentioned in the article? THAT fund gives specifics as to exactly where the money goes (was it because people could compare funds and realize that the "Janet Memorial Fund" set up in UTAH isn't specific as to where the money goes at all!!) Why was the fund set up in Utah and in Janets name? It should be in Kaiden's name IF it is for him...Does anyone know that if the fund was set up in Kaidens name, would Raven be able to get to the money? or would it just stay in the account until Kaiden was old enough to get the money?
I do think the family in AZ was kind, and just trying to help..but I think Raven and his Mom is definately trying to use connections to milk this...This whole thing just feels wrong. Am I the only one here? :mad:

I wonder how people would feel giving to the fund mentioned in the article if they knew Raven was facing embezzlement charges?
Snapple,

I agree with you completely. It is kind that the family in AZ wanted to help. However.... You raise very good points.

I too wonder what the reaction would be from the kind people who donated if they knew Raven had been charged with embezzlement.
 
snapple said:
OK..THIS JUST REEKS OF WRONG DOING...first, of all, why wasn't the fund that Janet's family set up mentioned in the article? THAT fund gives specifics as to exactly where the money goes (was it because people could compare funds and realize that the "Janet Memorial Fund" set up in UTAH isn't specific as to where the money goes at all!!) Why was the fund set up in Utah and in Janets name? It should be in Kaiden's name IF it is for him...Does anyone know that if the fund was set up in Kaidens name, would Raven be able to get to the money? or would it just stay in the account until Kaiden was old enough to get the money?
I do think the family in AZ was kind, and just trying to help..but I think Raven and his Mom is definately trying to use connections to milk this...This whole thing just feels wrong. Am I the only one here? :mad:

I wonder how people would feel giving to the fund mentioned in the article if they knew Raven was facing embezzlement charges?
Snapple, your right on the money...no pun intended!

So..............the Abaroas finally spoke out...uhhhhhhhhhhhhh for money!!!!!!!

Gee, where is the line, if you know anything about this murder, please call the Durham PD at this number.....as you mentioned, where is the alternative donation fund set up by JANET's family? OMG, these people are incredible..how can I benefit from my wife's murder (one that I possible did)!:furious: . Let's see know, they have put this fund in the NC paper. Mom spoke out in the memorial (sooooo tacky) in Virginia about this fund. The family has asked people in Arizona for money. The fund is in Utah and are probably begging for money there and now in California. Opportunist is too good of a word here for what is going on!
 
NCBanker said:
Note: Deena Thorpe is the daughter of Richard and Eva Peterson of San Diego North Stake 10th Ward. For questions or comments, Robbie Abaroa may be reached at: rabaroa@sbcglobal.net. END OF ARTICLE

Though I probably don't have to say it, let's not send any mail to the grandfather. ;)
Considering the grandfather's dead, that would be pretty tricky :)

Noticing your wink, I say let's email grandma with all our questions and comments! We sure have alot of them. Maybe she could answer them? I goggled her. She is a real estate agent in Chula Vista, California. I think this is by San Diego.
 
NCBanker said:
I wanted to phone the credit union in order to find out who the administrator is, but it appears my wife is going into labor with our 3rd baby, so we're going to be heading over to the hospital in a few minutes. I'll probably be out of pocket for a few days, at least. Someone please take the liberty to contact the credit union to find out who the administrator is. You can pose as a potential donor, or even actually donate if so inclined.

I just got off the phone with the credit union and was told that the grandpa is the administrator of the fund. The girl that answered the phone called him Boyton or something like that. Her exact words were, "Oh I know....Boyton....the grandpa." So, I'm not sure who this is, but that's what I was told. I'll call again later to see if I can get a full name of the administrator.
 
ItsMe said:
I just got off the phone with the credit union and was told that the grandpa is the administrator of the fund. The girl that answered the phone called him Boyton or something like that. Her exact words were, "Oh I know....Boyton....the grandpa." So, I'm not sure who this is, but that's what I was told. I'll call again later to see if I can get a full name of the administrator.

So that must be Raven's step-dad, Jim Bolton. Interesting. I was hoping the CU itself might be the administrator.
 
ItsMe said:
I just got off the phone with the credit union and was told that the grandpa is the administrator of the fund. The girl that answered the phone called him Boyton or something like that. Her exact words were, "Oh I know....Boyton....the grandpa." So, I'm not sure who this is, but that's what I was told. I'll call again later to see if I can get a full name of the administrator.
:clap: :clap: Yea, Thanks for doing that. Do you know was it Boyton or Bolton? Isn't Raven's Mom's last name Abaroa-Bolton?
 
ewwwinteresting said:
Considering the grandfather's dead, that would be pretty tricky :)

Noticing your wink, I say let's email grandma with all our questions and comments! We sure have alot of them. Maybe she could answer them? I goggled her. She is a real estate agent in Chula Vista, California. I think this is by San Diego.
Help - did I miss something? Was the memorial fund opened in the name of Raven's dead grandfather??!?!?!
 
Moxie said:
Help - did I miss something? Was the memorial fund opened in the name of Raven's dead grandfather??!?!?!
No, no Moxie. Someone called the CU in Utah to see who the administrator is on the trust fund... they were told the grandfather (meaning Kaiden's grandfather). And it SOUNDS like Bolton, which I assume would be Jim Bolton, Raven's step-dad.
 
Moxie said:
Help - did I miss something? Was the memorial fund opened in the name of Raven's dead grandfather??!?!?!
I think that Robbie Abaroa is the mom's Mother...the Mom's father is deceased.
 
snapple said:
:clap: :clap: Yea, Thanks for doing that. Do you know was it Boyton or Bolton? Isn't Raven's Mom's last name Abaroa-Bolton?
It for sure could have been Bolton. Probably was, makes much more sense. That would fit since someone mentioned that Raven's step dad is an electrician. So, that would seem correct!! Thanks for clearing that up.
 
snapple said:
I think that Robbie Abaroa is the mom's Mother...the Mom's father is deceased.
Oh - okay - thank you - it was getting confusing!
 
You know what I noticed in this article? Let me quote:

"Raven arrived home on April 26 after playing in a soccer game. He found his six-month-old son Kaiden asleep in his bed where he [Raven] had left him and soon after discovered his wife Janet, also 25, stabbed to death in an office in their home. Police are still investigating the crime."

I just thought that there's a tid bit of information that is interesting. Raven knew Kaiden was asleep because he had put him down for the night.

Maybe it's just interesting in my mind, but it makes me question when did Kaiden go down? Did he go to sleep early or later in the evening. My guess would be later so that Janet, after coming home from work, could see him and so that he'd sleep later into the morning, so Raven could recooperate from a late night on the computer.

Anyone else have thoughts?
 

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