HELP! Need ideas on how to stop someone.

Jennerbear

Active Member
Joined
Aug 5, 2004
Messages
166
Reaction score
62
My uncle (will name names if someone says I legally can. I certainly will. Yup) years ago molested BOTH of my big sisters that are 10 and 12 years older than me when I was a baby. This TEACHER (teacher!!!!) then went on to molest MANY of my female cousins and we think his own daughter (who is now deceased). His wife (my auntie) left him. The family didn't do ANYTHING legally at the time because of the proud matriarch of the family not wanting to look bad. :furious:

When I was a girl he was EXTREMELY mean to me to the point where I would come home from family functions crying. I was 12 when they told me what went down and why he was mean to me. My father threatened to kill him if he came near me. My family was a very hush hush family. I tell MY girls - I don't care WHO makes you uncomfortable you tattle!!!!!

My sister tried to kill herself a couple of times - never matured past 12 (she is 48) and is just... sad sad sad. Years later she had tried to prosecute him... they told her the statute of limitations was up. She called the school where he was teaching and tried to turn him in and they fired him... no legal stuff. This guy was NEVER punished sufficiently for what he did. I continue to see my sister (he got to her the worst and over a two year period) just destruct. My other cousins tried to do something but not until later when they realized that they had a voice I guess.

Other than trying to track this man down and make his life a living heck... is there anything I can do? What is done is done in my family but this man NEVER got hinderance or help... and an object in motion will stay in motion, yes? Advice?
 
Wow. I am so sorry for your family's pain. What a horrible parasite. I am sorry you'all had to endure this man, but I'm not sure anything can be done at this point other than keeping your loved ones FAR FAR away.

My heart goes out to you guys. XO
 
Thanks, Rob. Unfortunately he is a teacher of kids this SAME age. He likes 12 year olds. So it isn't just MY family.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Dre
How sickening. I pray for you and the rest of the innocents.
 
i don't know how it all works there. But you should go to the education board ( if you have such a thing there) and tell them his history
They should remove him immediate pending a investigation.
usually people like this continue to carry out their sick lives doing it over and over again. especially if never caught.
Im so sorry your family has had to endure this :(

Have you googled his name to find out if there is anything out there on him ?
 
I have googled, yes. Thanks Jane. I am sickened by this man. I have NO idea where he is. My plan is to call the school districts in the state where I am, look for him, and write a SNAIL MAIL letter. It seems like letters go further these days than they used to. I am just thankful to God that it didn't happen to me and I am able to raise my girls without that kind of garbage around them!


-JB
 
Oh, I'd never let it rest until the freak drops dead. I'd try to file any sort of lawsuits I could on this man. Maybe all the cousins could file a large lawsuit. Someone anonymous could make sure all his neighbors know that he's a pedophile, as well as any women he had taken up with. If he married a woman with kids, the other family needs to know. If he's so brazen about it, I'm suprised that he's actually lived this long without being killed by some irate male relative or beaten to a pulp.
 
o_O


I used Yahoo people search and asked my mom for a couple of things and I found him. I'm calling the school district Monday morning. PLUS I found his neighborhood and I am going to write letters to the people next to him. I will update you all.

I don't think anyone has hunted him down because a) no one wants to go to jail for this creepo b) we're hoping that God's punishment is going to be worse than anything he could get here.
 
Oh, I'd never let it rest until the freak drops dead. I'd try to file any sort of lawsuits I could on this man. Maybe all the cousins could file a large lawsuit. Someone anonymous could make sure all his neighbors know that he's a pedophile, as well as any women he had taken up with. If he married a woman with kids, the other family needs to know. If he's so brazen about it, I'm suprised that he's actually lived this long without being killed by some irate male relative or beaten to a pulp.
I agree you should seek advice from an attorney or two and bring with you statements from all who have been assaulted by him that you know of, and see if he can be sued. If he can be, it should ruin his future chances of working around other children. then send a shout out and you and lots of other folks would be more than willing to keep tabs on where he is and what he's doing to keep him the wanderer, with no roots, until and unless he turns himself in, and seeks justice for his victims. jmo
as a side note, God doesn't want anyone to perish, but to turn away from evil, repent, and turn toward good. Victims needs to know that it's not their fault, and that their abuser is truly remorseful for their crime, so they can begin to heal. jmo
 
I thought I had heard that maybe the law was being worked on to be changed on molestation. I don't know where I heard it but it seems like it was around a yr ago. This uncle thing happened to me to. I finally got to where I was telling anybody that would listen. My friends anyway, and my husband told his attorney, who was a friend of this uncle. ( we separated at one time ) She actually believed my husband. I have told enough people who have a good reputation that it has gotten around our small town. I feel this has been very effective. My mother, his sister, was all in a huff and told a relative she was tired of me being able to control their lives. Needless to say, I was very happy that I have gotten to them in some way. He doesn't work with children thankfully but it doesn't mean he hasn't done it again, I just pray that he hasn't. Sorry, I know that didn't help you figure out what to do, but I like to think that I've caused enough of a stir that he's not willing to risk his high paying job to do it again.
 
I agree with you about God's will for victims AND offenders. He is working with special ed apparently. I will email all family members involved and ask if they'd be willing to make statements. My other sister is ex LE and will probably get together with me on this and see what we can do. Thanks for the help.
 
JennerBear - don't forget your sister. Please try to help her seek counseling and whatever else she might need to help her heal.

My prayers are with you in your search for justice.

Salem
 
I have a very similar story. My pastor, grandfather molested me from the age of 6-9. He also has a long history of being sued, fired, etc from counseling jobs for sexual harrassment. I tried to do something about this a few years ago, contacted Ohio det. and they said the statute was out, 7yrs. Maryland said 20yrs but I couldn't lie and say that it ihad been w/in 20 yrs. My dad is crazy over the whole thing, I repressed until I was 17, ever since, he can't let it go. He's called his friends, employers, chuches, SDA conference. No one wants to help. I'm sure he's done this to other children and probably continues.

I'm sorry for your dead end, I understand.
 
Maya - so sorry to hear you went through that atrociousness! Maybe post on craigslist?? Can you get in trouble for that? Dunno. Anyway...

what we've done for my sister is this:

Paid for Christmas for her kids for several years. Playstations, trips to Disneyland, etc. We are NOT rich or anything... we weren't buying OURSELVES stuff like that, lol. We paid for their car to be fixed SEVERAL times. Her husband left her for a 21 year old and she got hooked up with a meth addict. We had her move in with us, helper her get a job and offered her to stay there until she got on her feet. We offered to help her get a vehicle and pay NO rent, NO chores - no room and board... nothing. The only deal was she couldn't talk to her crack head boyfriend. She lasted one month. My hubby told her that she had to choose if she wanted to go back to her state or stay and not talk to crack head bf. She chose to go back to her state. We HAD to wash our hands and just pray for her as it came to the point where it was going to be to the detriment of our family.
 
If I remember correctly, in many states, there is no statute of limitations when it comes to sexual abuse to children under 16. I would get legal council and attempt to throw his butt in jail and MAKE SURE that the population there knows WHY!
 
o_O


I used Yahoo people search and asked my mom for a couple of things and I found him. I'm calling the school district Monday morning. PLUS I found his neighborhood and I am going to write letters to the people next to him. I will update you all.

I don't think anyone has hunted him down because a) no one wants to go to jail for this creepo b) we're hoping that God's punishment is going to be worse than anything he could get here.

With all of that "false reporting" and "slander" business it can be VERY hard to seek justice once the legal system is out of the question. Does anyone know of ways to do this without getting yourself fried for "slander"?
 
I was in a similar situation. I found the guy who had molested me as a child. He's sitting in prison in Ohio for 4 years for doing something similar. Sickening. Wish I could have stopped it- I was only a kid. I wonder if there is anything I can do now? I would love to post his mugshot because I know he has been doing this for at least 25 years.
 
If he is still teaching somewhere I would not just call, but write the schoolboard and District Attorney's office and inform them of his history. I would insist that in addition to firing him, this time an investigation should be done.

That way you have proof that they were made aware, and it will become their liability if they don't investigate him and he molests someone after they are informed. Tell them if that happens you WILL send a copy of the letter to the media proving they knew about him. His past firing should've come up in his background check for his new teaching job. Don't they check references anymore????

My elementary school principle WILLIAM DEGRACE was a fugitive before being tracked down and arrested for molesting boys at the school and also his foster sons at his home.

The school district sent letters to the parents of the students and the local paper ran an article so any parents of or former students could come forward if they were victims.
 
:confused: After "minor" molestation by 2 separate offenders (1 at the age of 7 <he's in prison for molesting his stepchild>) and (a string of offenses by a 17 year old babysitter when I was appr. 9/10 <he was never prosecuted>), I was molested by my uncle. It wasn't invasive or painful, and I told my parents who didn't do anything (I think they just wanted to avoid family problems.) Strangely to me (due to the fact of the other molestations) it seemed fairly normal. He later plead guilty to molesting his own daughter (non-sexual assault plea):furious: I feel if I had pushed the issue more I could have prevented this from happening to her. Now in the course of talking to his new family (the one he got after all the other incidents happened) I'm getting the strange suspicion that he has at least done this to his step daughter and possibly his other daughter. She made some chilling comments without saying that he'd done that to her as well. She read about my experience in my blog and asked me if it was her dad. When I replied yes and explained the situation she said well that's one of a list from what I understand. I feel (intuitively) that she's on that list. They now have 3 Toddler/infant girls that he regularly has access too and i'm wondering if it's still happening?:confused: I can't prove what he did to me, how can I help?
Oh, and it's my very first WS post.
 

Members online

Online statistics

Members online
111
Guests online
1,563
Total visitors
1,674

Forum statistics

Threads
589,162
Messages
17,915,034
Members
227,745
Latest member
branditau.wareham72@gmail
Back
Top