11 year old commits suicide.

[Hopeful One]

Depression can affect you at any age unfortunately. I remember being about five (I know I hadn't started school yet) and sitting on my front porch talking with God about wanting to die and be with him. I'm not sure I understood the finality of it but I knew I didn't want to be where I was.

Another unfortunate thing is most people don't think young children or pre-adolescents can suffer this much so they don't recognize it until sometimes it's too late.

I wish there had been someone in this little girl's life that she could open up to and maybe work through those feelings. Somewhere she felt that she was safe from ridicule and whatever else was going on in her life.

I think part of the problem is that someone who hasn't experienced true clinical depression cannot comprehend the feelings associated with it. I know I have tried to explain it to my mom on several occassions and she's just blown away. Even when I'm feeling 'good', I can barely comprehend the feelings. But in the midst of it, it complelety and utterly changes your mind.

 

[Boyz_Mum]

When I was working as a social worker I once had a child, 8 years old, that tried to kill himself several times in really imaginative ways. Myself and several others worked really hard to have him admitted AGAIN to a children's crisis center. Took quite awhile because Medicaid didn't want to pay again. Finally got him in and while there ON SUICIDE WATCH he managed to kill himself by ramming a plastic fork down his throat while in the bathroom. So much for suicide watch.


I was devestated...

Thank you Linda7NJ for trying. Why was an 8 year old taking such desparate measures? Was it home life? Was it school life? I'm angry because I don't know what to do to protect my own 11 year old- it happens, even in the best of families.

 

[OneLostGrl]

The term "Depression" has become so broad and is so widley used in our society that there is massive misconception as to what "true" depression is.

A marriage breaks up and a person becomes "depressed", our car breaks down, we fail a class, we have financial problems, a loved one dies, our beloved pet runs away from home, we get laid off from our job...we get "depressed", it is "depressing". These are examples of situational depression which differs from clinical depression.

A person does not have to have difficulties in their life to become "depressed". In fact, they could have everything they ever dreamed of and still they want to die. These people have a chemical imbalance in their brains. Their depression is not a reaction to a person or event. They have a brain disorder, theirs doesn't work like yours!

I can understand you all wanting a reason for a kid wanting to die at 11 or at 8 years old but it's as simple and as complicated as this- some people are born not wanting to live... our depression is uncaused and comes from within. It is a part of our very existence. Sadly sometimes mental illness is fatal, no matter a sufferers age.

You should be angry! You should be scared to death because it very well could be one of your loved ones someday. More people suffer from Depression than Cancer, Heart disease and HIV. Over 30,000 Americans die by Suicide each year.


We need more funding for mental health research. We need more studies on causes, treatments and prevention. We need to DEstigmatize mental illness- we need to stop feeling ashamed and speak up.. we need to tell our stories and get in peoples faces.

We need to find a cure!


okok, I'm sorry- I'm done now!

 

[txsvicki]

When I was working as a social worker I once had a child, 8 years old, that tried to kill himself several times in really imaginative ways. Myself and several others worked really hard to have him admitted AGAIN to a children's crisis center. Took quite awhile because Medicaid didn't want to pay again. Finally got him in and while there ON SUICIDE WATCH he managed to kill himself by ramming a plastic fork down his throat while in the bathroom. So much for suicide watch.


I was devestated...

Do you think he was bipolar? It's not easy trying to find help for a child who is having severe problems unless there is some really good insurance involved. It's disgraceful.

 

[dingo]

What could be so bad about an 11 year old's life that they'd want to end it?

Its too sad to even comprehend

 

[lizzybeth]

Shamrock, I'm right there with you. I don't know how many times my mom told me to think about my blessings, to rise above it, etc. She still doesn't understand.

OneLostGrl, you said that so well. My father suffered from depression all of his life and threatened to end it all ever since I can remember. He committed suicide at the age of 75. A lot of people couldn't understand why he did it at such an ADVANCED age. All I know is it was a struggle for him daily NOT to end his life.

This little girl may have been having problems at school with bullying, or petty little girl games but there are many girls that do that don't choose suicide. My doctor claims a lot of my depression comes from not having coping skills. Every obstacle is another reason not to want to be here. It sounds like this little girl had the same problem and like I said unfortunately no one recognized it and sought help for her.

I think her mother even said in the article that she didn't realize that the problems she was having at school were that bad. Maybe to everyone else they weren't that bad but to her they seemed insurmountable.

 

[Linda7NJ]

Do you think he was bipolar? It's not easy trying to find help for a child who is having severe problems unless there is some really good insurance involved. It's disgraceful.

I don't think so. I honestly don't know or understand his reasoning. For the year I knew him, I spent lots of time with this child. He was the most pessimistic person I have ever known. Perhaps that had something to do with it.

 

[Hopeful One]

OneLostGirl, you said that so very well. So many people don't understand that true clinical depression can be a FATAL disease.

 

[IrishMist]

Shamrock, lizzybeth and OneLostGirl, we are kindred spirits. I, too, know depression well. Suicidal thoughts have been with me for most of my life, until the last few years. Now they are few and far between.

The first time I tried to kill myself, I was 11. Yes, sometimes life is too hard, even at 11.

 

[Hopeful One]

Shamrock and OneLostGirl, we are kindred spirits. I, too, know depression well. Suicidal thoughts have been with me for most of my life, until the last few years. Now they are few and far between.

The first time I tried to kill myself, I was 11. Yes, sometimes life is too hard, even at 11.

I'm so sorry you have suffered with this as well. People just don't understand how hard it is to live with. I feel as though I do have a nearly perfect life but I have those moments where I feel like I can't possibly take another breath. It's been much better for the past five years or so but I still have my moments.

Bless you. :blowkiss:

 

[IrishMist]

Shamrock: :blowkiss:

 

[OneLostGrl]

Shamrock, I'm right there with you. I don't know how many times my mom told me to think about my blessings, to rise above it, etc. She still doesn't understand.

OneLostGrl, you said that so well. My father suffered from depression all of his life and threatened to end it all ever since I can remember. He committed suicide at the age of 75. A lot of people couldn't understand why he did it at such an ADVANCED age. All I know is it was a struggle for him daily NOT to end his life.

This little girl may have been having problems at school with bullying, or petty little girl games but there are many girls that do that don't choose suicide. My doctor claims a lot of my depression comes from not having coping skills. Every obstacle is another reason not to want to be here. It sounds like this little girl had the same problem and like I said unfortunately no one recognized it and sought help for her.

I think her mother even said in the article that she didn't realize that the problems she was having at school were that bad. Maybe to everyone else they weren't that bad but to her they seemed insurmountable.

It is- it really is! I remember the feeling of utter fear and dread that filled me one time I went to the pharmacy and they couldn't get my anti-psychotic (which rids my suidical ideations) until the following week. I said, "This is a life saving medication, I can't be without it until next week!" and it's true, at that time I couldn't, I probably would have died from my disease.

 

[OneLostGrl]

Irishmist and Shamrock *hugs*

It never goes away, even when we are medicated.. it's always lurking around back there. I feel it trying to push it's way foward often but it's different now because I have learned how to shove it back without the aid of narcotics.

What we have is a lifelong illness and every day we make it we are survivors!

 

[mywarmbluefleece]

The term "Depression" has become so broad and is so widley used in our society that there is massive misconception as to what "true" depression is.

A marriage breaks up and a person becomes "depressed", our car breaks down, we fail a class, we have financial problems, a loved one dies, our beloved pet runs away from home, we get laid off from our job...we get "depressed", it is "depressing". These are examples of situational depression which differs from clinical depression.

A person does not have to have difficulties in their life to become "depressed". In fact, they could have everything they ever dreamed of and still they want to die. These people have a chemical imbalance in their brains. Their depression is not a reaction to a person or event. They have a brain disorder, theirs doesn't work like yours!

I can understand you all wanting a reason for a kid wanting to die at 11 or at 8 years old but it's as simple and as complicated as this- some people are born not wanting to live... our depression is uncaused and comes from within. It is a part of our very existence. Sadly sometimes mental illness is fatal, no matter a sufferers age.

You should be angry! You should be scared to death because it very well could be one of your loved ones someday. More people suffer from Depression than Cancer, Heart disease and HIV. Over 30,000 Americans die by Suicide each year.


We need more funding for mental health research. We need more studies on causes, treatments and prevention. We need to DEstigmatize mental illness- we need to stop feeling ashamed and speak up.. we need to tell our stories and get in peoples faces.

We need to find a cure!


okok, I'm sorry- I'm done now!

This is somewhat off topic but related to what you said. In some families, depression is genetic. I began suffering from depression in early childhood as did my mother, her mother, her sister, her cousins (everyone on that sad) Johns Hopkins University is trying to do a study to see if they can find the gene for depression. I am taking part. Depression is a very tragic misunderstood illness and I feel so terrible for this child. Yes, it can get that bad when you are 11. I remember feeling like that and I've had 11 year olds in my class seriously threaten suicide. They were miserable.

If anyone wants to know about the research study please send me a PM. We can't save this poor little girl but maybe eventually we can save someone.

 

[OneLostGrl]

This is somewhat off topic but related to what you said. In some families, depression is genetic. I began suffering from depression in early childhood as did my mother, her mother, her sister, her cousins (everyone on that sad) Johns Hopkins University is trying to do a study to see if they can find the gene for depression. I am taking part. Depression is a very tragic misunderstood illness and I feel so terrible for this child. Yes, it can get that bad when you are 11. I remember feeling like that and I've had 11 year olds in my class seriously threaten suicide. They were miserable.

If anyone wants to know about the research study please send me a PM. We can't save this poor little girl but maybe eventually we can save someone.

Research shows that mental illness definitely has a genetic component and suicide does run in families.

Here is more research that may be of interest to you or to others here. http://www.brainbank.mclean.org/

I am pre-registered with a brain bank and my family knows of my wishes.

 

[mywarmbluefleece]

Research shows that mental illness definitely has a genetic component and suicide does run in families.

Here is more research that may be of interest to you or to others here. http://www.brainbank.mclean.org/

I am pre-registered with a brain bank and my family knows of my wishes.

Yes...they are trying to find the actual part of the gene its on using DNA samples. This poor little girl...

 

[chiperoni]

One of the difficult parts of the disease of depression is that it affects everyone else that is close to you. You become a shell of your former self. Some people shun you and others are perplexed and heartbroken. This all happened after the birth of my twins over thrirty years ago. At that time people were put in state hospitals. My husband left me with four children and my family was ashamed of me. I never wanted to hurt my babies but I did try suicide (obviously I'm here). I was taking thorazine and prolyxin. It took me over 5 years but I got over it slowly by throwing away the pills. Those medications were horrible. Even after improving (I am very thankful) I felt depressed but I kept going and finally antidepressents became available. They have helped and they don't make me euphoric or sleepy, but they cannot do the whole job. It's like a sleeping tiger. I basically got over the worst depression when I was in my thirties, raised my children, and remarried a wonderful man; however, I am always aware of my limitations because It never goes away. It does get better. Of course I have had some hits in life because I'm a young old lady, but I have survived. For you young guys I pray that researchers find a cure for depression in your lifetime but in the meantime we'll all take it a day at a time. OneLostGirl, mywarmbluefleece, IrishMist, Shamrock, and Lizzybeth I'm with you. My heart breaks for that 11 year old girl. Where were her parents and teachers? I think Junior Highs are not a good situation for young adolescents. The school population is too big and a child gets lost in the crowd. I wish the educational system would go back to K-8. Teachers and counselors could keep a closer eye on an at-risk child.

 

[txsvicki]

I don't think so. I honestly don't know or understand his reasoning. For the year I knew him, I spent lots of time with this child. He was the most pessimistic person I have ever known. Perhaps that had something to do with it.

That pessimistic at age eight. I can only imagine the thoughts that went through his mind and these other kids who commit suicide. They don't even have the life experience or knowledge of mental illness to even verbalize what all is going on in their thoughts and probably can't even explain why they feel certain ways.

 

[6angels]

How very sad My prayers are with her family and prayers. I wonder what was going on in her life that made her take this step.


I also wonder WTH was she doing with a myspace account at 11 years old. I don't care what my daughter says she would not have a myspace at such a young age! ( my dd is also 11)

It says she made comments on myspace that she was going to kill herself by taking pills. This child needed help and called out for help but it does not look like she received it in return.

 

[6angels]

I found this in the comments on this page .. Makes me so sad. If she was being abused and her dad and grandparents and family knew this why did they not step in and do something?
http://www.pjstar.com/news/x192204800/Parents-mourn-senseless-death

bethanysdad
8 hours ago
Report Abuse
Listening to your child's complaints, fears, and other issues aren't limited to just teasing at the hands of cruel classmates. I assure you Bethany wasn't ignored solely on those things alone. That little girl was subjected to some of the most heinous abuse and neglect imaginable, and more than once, her claims went untended.
I'm quite sure her mother is heartbroken, but ask her about the years of disgusting sexual abuse at the hands of her boyfriend, Michael Good. Ask her how many boyfriends she had that threatened, neglected, and abused my baby girl. Ask her how long she'd been bouncing from place to place. Ask her about living with my brother and sister, and how my brother and sister-at different points-had to care for, and look after Bethany and Erik. Ask her why she never contacted me to help with things if her life consisted of living out of hotel rooms, while at the same time locking those little kids out of them. While you're at it, ask her about Bethany coming to live with me in 2000, with a case of head lice so advanced and ignored, Bethany had dug scabs into her scalp. Go on, ask her. Ask her if she knows that both her parents have told me those kids were better off with me because Bethany's mom couldn't quite get it together. Then ask her why her baby girl wanted out of this life so badly. Watch her distribute blame to everyone but herself.

Where would Bethany get an idea like that? I don't know, but you could ask her mother about the many years of allowing those kids to watch graphically violent movies. Then ask her what she said to me when I expressed concern on the issue.

Don't kid yourselves...a little girl doesn't hang herself in the yard without a good reason, and simply being teased or bullied at school isn't a good enough reason to me. I knew my daughter better than that. She was strong-willed, and confident. Ask her mother if she knew about Bethany telling me over the phone that her mother was a 'failure as a parent'.

Then ask yourself if something shouldn't be done.