Ashley Rogers, Glenn HS, committed suicide after harassing texts

Discussion in 'Bullies and Stalkers' started by Paladine, Apr 16, 2010.

  1. Paladine

    Paladine New Member

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    Saw this sad news and thought I'd post...I don't have much time, right now, but felt this poor child deserved her own thread.

    Published: April 16, 2010

    KERNERSVILLE

    http://www2.journalnow.com/content/2010/apr/16/officials-student-glenn-hangs-self-after-receiving/
     
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  3. Laurence

    Laurence New Member

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    Not posting a link, but she does have a FB page that currently is still up. Privacy settings are active, so can't see if she was getting harrassed there like we've heard about in the Phoebe Prince case.
     
  4. Phoenixfla

    Phoenixfla New Member

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    Snipped from this article:

    "The students were told that such behavior would not be tolerated. Because the messages were not sent during school hours, no disciplinary action was taken against the students, Helm said."

    That does not sound right to me. If an employer would allow an employee to remain employed, that is know to be harrassing another employee, even off hours, I believe the employer could be held liable.
     
  5. Paladine

    Paladine New Member

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    Yes, I agree. There needs to be a shift in attitude and law. I have been reading about so many of these young girls commiting suicide over this, it's tragically stunning. I never knew there were so many. I'm reading about a new one, again, now.

    I also read rumor kids we're taken in for questioning, in this case...I'll keep an eye open for more on poor Ashley...
     
  6. Paladine

    Paladine New Member

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    Police are still investigating...

    http://www2.journalnow.com/content/2010/apr/17/girl-15-didnt-intend-to-kill-herself-parents-say/
     
  7. Paladine

    Paladine New Member

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    Photo of Ashley...
     

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  8. Jenni979

    Jenni979 Member

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    I don't want anything in what I am writing to make it seem like I am condoning bullying in any form, or saying that being cruel to any other person is acceptable, but...

    I tried to kill myself in my early 20's, and came VERY close to succeeding... So, although I have no idea what was going on in this girl's world (or her head) I feel like I have some idea of how she may have been feeling...

    I can say, with all honesty, that I had suicidal thoughts throughout my teen years and early 20's. I only actively tried to do myself in the one time... No one bullied me, or was cruel to me... I can't blame my mental state on anything or anyone other than the fact that there was something amiss within me.

    I kept everything inside and never told my family or friends what I was going through, so I did not go to therapy. I just tried to deal with all that on my own...

    Well, in my early 20's I was in a terrible and abusive relationship... While I will admitt that this situation may have added fuel to the fire, it did not create the problem. Finally, I got to the point where I just didn't want to deal with any of "this" any longer. I ODed on everything in the house and wrote my little letter to my family and was ready to go die.

    Well, the evil boyfriend found me and took me to the ER. The entire ride he was screaming about how I better not tell the ER staff that this was because of him and that if they had to admit me, he would kill me himself... Blah, blah, blah... The ER staff took me in, pumped my stomach, forced activated charcoal down my throat via tube, and all that other fun stuff...

    I was in the ICU for the longest time because they could not get my heart to find it's rhythm... After that I had to go to psych, etc.

    I guess I felt the need to tell this story because a huge part of my recovery was being able to see the world through eyes that were not clouded by all the wierdness that was only in my head. Being able to tell the difference between the real world and what I was creating in my own mind.

    I just know that had I not been in my abusive relationship the same thing would have happened... If not then, then some other time in the future. He may have been a trigger, but I had been a woman on the verge way before I ever knew he existed.

    These bullies may have spead up the process, but it seems like this young girl had started this journey a while ago.

    None of this is to say that I think her death was inevitable... I just know that once all the elements are already there for the perfect storm, all you do is wait for an excuse.

    If it hadn't been these bullies, it may have been the 1st boy that broke her heart, failing a class in college, loosing a loved one or just having a bad day...

    I do think that these bullies should be punished. What they did was wrong and there is no excusing that...

    I guess maybe I just have a slightly different way of looking at this...

    I am sorry if I offended anyone, and if you think I am just blatantly wrong, then so be it... This is just what I have experienced. I know each of us is different and have different views... This is just my opinion...

    Thanks for listening to my Loooong post...
     
  9. Paladine

    Paladine New Member

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    hey Jen...:) Thank you very much for your long post. And heartfelt words.

    And you are right, there can be many reasons for suicide...and some people do have more troubles dealing with this world we live in...I'm just happy YOU found your way...*hugs*
     
  10. Hucklepie

    Hucklepie New Member

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    I graduated from Glenn (Ashley's school) in 1998 and still know a number of students there who are my Facebook friends, and I was able to see Ashley's page in the days right after her death, although I haven't checked in about a week to see if it's still visible. I looked back as far as the beginning of March but didn't see anything untoward - mostly horoscope/application posts generated by Facebook, and a few "hey, what's up?" kinds of things from her friends.

    From what I've heard from friends, her suicide really rocked the school and community. Glenn is a big school but not giant - maybe 1,400 students by now - and she was involved with the swim team, drama club, French club, and a few other school activities. Her classmates have posted kind messages on her Facebook memorial page and talk about good memories, but I haven't heard anyone mention who the boys were that sent harassing text messages. (or anything about the harassment at all, really.)

    My heart goes out to her parents. I've read that they aren't pressing any charges at all because they don't believe the harassment was responsible for Ashley's death, and they don't feel that she was trying to kill herself - just a cry for attention. It's so sad.
     
  11. babygirl94

    babygirl94 New Member

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    Good Evening Websleuth Members,

    First let me introduce myself. I am Christine Rogers, Ashley Rogers mother. I happened to stumble upon this website and have found it very informative. However, I feel I need to clear up some misinformation. My husband and myself did NOT CHOOSE to NOT have the boys charged. We were advised by the local police dept and DA that no charges WOULD be filed. I am confused about this for several reasons. I did go to the school on April 13th due to a report from Ashley that one of the boys in question, spit drink in her face. During this interation with the school officials and SRO, I brought up the fact these boys had been sending very mean and degrading text messages the week before. Ashley asked me not to say anything at the time because the boys started the conversation to try to get her to have sex with them. When she refused, they resorted to very hurtful comments, including "go kill yourself you fat cow". So, the night my daughter came home and said she had a "bad day at school" and would not discuss it and then became very angry because we, as her parents, would not allow her to stay out of school the next day. She was alone for less than 10 minutes. I do not feel this was a "cry for help". I feel whatever happened at the school, possible retibution from th boys or their friends, made going to school very stressful. I wish she had spoken to me about it. Ashley had made some bad decisions last year. This was the cause of her depression. She was making the changes she needed to make for herself. However, once a person has a reputation, some judgmental people will not let go of those mistakes. Ashley was a wonderful person. Her father and I miss her TERRIBLY. She is our only child and we have a HUGE void in our house.
    Her father and I went public because we feel there needs to be more attention not only on the bullying and the loop holes in the laws but also to teen depression and suicide. Many people do not publicize the suicide of a loved one, let alone a child. We have recieved many unkind words because of this. We will continue to fight to prevent another family from going through the HELL we are currently experiencing.
    Sorry this is so long. Thank you for taking the time to read. Please reply if you have any questions.
     
  12. Pandora

    Pandora New Member

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    My heart goes out to you, Mrs. Rogers. There are not enough words to express how I feel.
     
  13. rosario

    rosario New Member

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    thankyou for your post I think it takes incredible courage and strengthto admit our deepest pain and weaknesses...My son is going into 7th grade and he seems well adjusted and "ok" but I really try to be watchful for triggers or things that are a part of him they may cause him to suffer silently...i really appreciated your thoughts...god bless..
     
  14. rosario

    rosario New Member

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    Christine, let me first say how deeply sorry I am for your loss. As a parent I cannot even fathom your pain, Iwill put you and your husband in my prayers..Thankyou for posting on websleuths, this site has soooo many caring, thoughtful and very helpful people on here. Your daughters story seems so tragic and senseless. After reading your thoughts I think most of us can look back at our youth and say we made "mistakes", that is absolutely no reason for that kind of treatment to ever be allowed or tolerated by the school, parents or staff. Were you able to speak to the boys parents at all?? What did they say?? Did the school have any programs in place for bullying???Im sure your daughter knew she was loved, and I am sooo sorry you are going through this pain, I truly believe these boys should have some very serious consequences for their actions.I really think a lot of adults just view this kind of behavior as "kids being kids", it is not right..Without going into a huge story,( which is not the same as what you are going thru) when I was caught at a high school party drinking by the police, I was forced to go to a class where parents of children who died in alcohol related crashes were there and other teens who had been the drivers were also present, it was horrific...so sad, As a 16 year old I really thought it was ridiculous and unncessary because everyone "partied" I thought I was being just like everyone else, and I was humiliated at having to attend, I thought the police and my mother were over reacting ..., well I have never, ever forgot what i felt that day. It was probably one of the most important things that have ever happened to me..I am 36 now and I have never driven while drunk or gotten into a car while someone else has. That 2 hour meeting had a profound affect on me..The reason why i wanted to tell you this was I think you speaking about your daughter and everything that has happened, WILL really save and help other teens and parents who unfortunately are suffering the way you have and can , also law enforcement can really learn from what is and is not happening with your story...Please dont give up, we wont give up on the memory of your daughter, I will be speaking to my children tonight...thankyou again for your post and your courage...God Bless
     
  15. babygirl94

    babygirl94 New Member

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    Rosario,
    Thank you for your kind words and prayers. They are truly needed at this time. To answer your question; No, We have not spoken to the boys/man (one of them is 20) or their parents. We called the school when we heard other teens threatening them. We did not want the cycle to continue. We were told that both students no longer attended Glenn. This was the decision by the parents and school. The parents have not tried to contact us at all.
    We will continue our fight against bullying as well as getting teens help with depression or get a suicide prevention program in place. To my knowledge, there is no program at Glenn. Ashley was the second known suicide in 2 years. That shows a pattern and a definite problem.

    Sincerely,
    Christine
     
  16. rosario

    rosario New Member

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    Thankyou Christine, your bravery is inspirational, I want you to know that I had a really indepth conversation with my soon to be seventh grader about a lot of this, your pain is so horribe but I want you to know that I will do my best to inspire, educate, and perserve for education of these issues at my sons school, I would love to contact you directly if you are comfortable with that so I will e-mail you my personal information....I would love to bring anything that can make a difference at my childrens school, thank you for sharing and again, keep going, please , there are soooo many parents who need you, I know that sounds sooo selfish but there is such a battle out there for our children and you can offer sooo much to us who are learning and suffering and trying to prevent things.... I would love to utilize anything that can help other children who are suffering....You are such an inspiration..God bless
     
  17. rosario

    rosario New Member

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    Thankyou Christine, your bravery is inspirational, I want you to know that I had a really indepth conversation with my soon to be seventh grader about a lot of this, your pain is so horribe but I want you to know that I will do my best to inspire, educate, and perserve for education of these issues at my sons school, I would love to contact you directly if you are comfortable with that so I will e-mail you my personal information....I would love to bring anything that can make a difference at my childrens school, thank you for sharing and again, keep going, please , there are soooo many parents who need you, I know that sounds sooo selfish but there is such a battle out there for our children and you can offer sooo much to us who are learning and suffering and trying to prevent things.... I would love to utilize anything that can help other children who are suffering....You are such an inspiration..God bless I have to figure out how to e-mail you privately so just bare with me....Thanks again...
     
  18. babygirl94

    babygirl94 New Member

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    Since I am new to this forum, I am not sure how to send a private email. I have changed my options to receive emails from members.

    All members, Please understand if I do not respond immediately, if at all. I am still in shock and grieving. I am trying to make a difference but it will take some time on my part. I still miss my baby girl so much it hurts! Thank you for your understanding.
     
  19. rosario

    rosario New Member

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    of cousre no worries I will really try not to overhwelm u..xoxoxooxoxo
     
  20. rosario

    rosario New Member

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    christine ...just wanted to let you know i am thinking about you...
     
  21. Hucklepie

    Hucklepie New Member

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    babygirl94, my heart goes out to you and your family.

    As a Glenn graduate (and now a high school teacher in another community), it makes me angry that there is not more of a support structure in place in high schools to combat bullying. The school where I teach did a bullying awareness week this past year, with a video contest and other events, but by and large it was treated as a joke. It's painful to realize that kids don't take such a subject seriously until it comes to something like this.

    I'm not familiar with Glenn's current administration, but I substitute-taught there several times in recent years and was horrified at how little they seemed to care about the students' and teachers' well-being. Granted, it's hard to get any school to take a substitute's feelings seriously, but there were multiple incidents between students in classes I was subbing for that were brushed off as "stop overreacting" by the then-administrators, leading me to stop subbing there altogether. I hope something changes there - and in all high schools - very soon.
     

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