Assault on a bike?!!!!!!!

Discussion in 'Bizarre and Off-Beat News' started by missacorah, Nov 16, 2007.

  1. missacorah

    missacorah New Member

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    A WEIRDO was caught having sex with a BICYCLE by two cleaners.
    The women had walked in on Robert Stewart in his hostel room, a court heard.
    Gail Davidson, prosecuting, said: “They observed the accused wearing only a white T-shirt, naked from the waist down. He was holding the bike and moving his hips back and forth.”
    But when Stewart, 51, noticed cleaners Alice Craig and Donna Clark, he calmly asked “What is it, hen?” – then carried on.

    http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article470592.ece
     
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  3. GlitchWizard

    GlitchWizard Reprobate

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    Sounds like he was just horsing around to mess with the cleaners. I think it's funny. Then again, I'm an idiot. :)
     
  4. angelmom

    angelmom The love stays...forever in our hearts

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    Okay, first of all, he was in his own room. So why is it a breach of the peace.

    Second, why does he need to be added to the sex offender registry? Are other bikes at risk? Should he be questioned if bikes are missing? Maybe he should be forbidden from living or working less than 1000 feet from a bike rack. And getting biking magazines, looking at bike websites, or hanging around with people who have bikes.

    This guy is weird, but WTF???
     
  5. GlitchWizard

    GlitchWizard Reprobate

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    It would save people money on lubing the bikes, anyway. Consider him the maintenance man.
     
  6. gman20001969

    gman20001969 New Member

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    FUNNY! :laugh:
     
  7. angelmom

    angelmom The love stays...forever in our hearts

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    EWWWWWWW!!!

    I was eating a sandwich with mayo when I read this post.

    I have to go and :sick: now.
     
  8. GlitchWizard

    GlitchWizard Reprobate

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    ....I meant like KY jelly or baby oil.... but yours is funnier!
     
  9. kahskye

    kahskye Inactive

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    If he has a thing for bikes, or maybe a bike fetish, so be it. I'll just have to remind my dd not to leave hers out front unattended. He might be partial to purple. Seriously, I'd rather have him assault a bike than an innocent child or animal.
     
  10. shwa

    shwa New Member

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    Just wondering if it was a girl's or boy's bike?

    All kidding aside, i think that he has abit of a fantasy life or quite a wild imagination, but there was no harm done.
     
  11. Jules

    Jules Former Member

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    Not unless the bike turns up pregnant. :D :D :D
     
  12. csds703

    csds703 Former Member

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    How do you have sex with a bike?????

    Never mind...
     
  13. MeoW333

    MeoW333 New Member

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    Where on the bike would he... i can't fathom this..
     
  14. angelmom

    angelmom The love stays...forever in our hearts

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    Try not to think about it. You'll only ruin your lunch.
     
  15. missacorah

    missacorah New Member

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    Lol your comments about this have really made me smile this morning. The bit I found amusing was when he just casually asked the cleaner what was up as if he was doing the most normal thing in the world lol.
     
  16. Filly

    Filly KICKING AND SHINING

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    Hey, as long as he wasn't wearing a furry Panda Bear costume while getting it on with his bike and nobody was harmed well go for it. I guess. You guys are funny.
     
  17. nappy2

    nappy2 Have you kissed your cat today?

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    This is the funnest story I ever heard of !
     

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