CA - Elliot Rodger kills 6, injures 13 in Isla Vista, Near UC Santa Barbara, #2

Discussion in 'Rampage Killings and Terrorist Attacks' started by Coldpizza, May 24, 2014.

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  1. Elley Mae

    Elley Mae Well-Known Member

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    No stones from me. I wish you all the best for your son, I hope he continues on his positive path of a drug free life. Addict is a tough one to beat. The next time you are in his presence hug him for me, just don't tell him. :blushing:
     


  2. Zuri

    Zuri Well-Known Member

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    Thank you for your kindness. I remember when my son was 8 and he was delightful. I never thought in a million years we would end up where we did. He is incredibly smart, looks like Paul Walker, had everything going for him. It is a long road back. We are smart, well educated parents and we missed this. We believed him when he said he wasn't using.

    We had no idea he would be stupid enough to shoot heroin in his arm. He hid it well. It wasn't until we noticed massive amounts of money missing that we got a clue. And mind you, he was seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist because we thought he had bipolar subset 2. He wouldn't take the meds because they made him feel bad.

    This can happen to anyone, of any socio economic background, education level. You just never know. Bless you and yours.
     
  3. jjenny

    jjenny Well-Known Member

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    Some do. It's even used as a defense against criminal charges nowdays. Remember another victim off affluenza who killed several people in a drunken driving accident? I am sure it's a combination of nurture and nature.
     
  4. bettybaby00

    bettybaby00 Active Member

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    *hugs*

    I completely understand what you're saying. My brother was an addict for 20+ years, and it was so difficult for my family, my parents in particular.

    In many of these situations, the family has very little control, not only of the addiction, but also what brought on the addiction. I'll never forget when one time my father, who was in his 70s at the time, broke down and asked, "what did we do wrong?"

    As a younger sibling, I always questioned, why him... why not me? We had the same parents, and the same upbringing. As a teen I had a solid set of self-regulatory instincts to know how far to take experimentation, and partying. My brother on the other hand, would see the boundary, and figure out how far he could propel himself past it.

    I'm no expert by any means, but my experience has led me to believe that addiction, and I think many mental illnesses/disorders are due in part by our "wiring." And idk how we can effectively change or intervene in these situations.
     
  5. Paladine

    Paladine Active Member

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    Check out page 123-126 of the writings. His Dad drove up to SB and took him to hospital for his leg. Then he stayed with his Mom for a bit. His Mother drove him to surgery at begininng of August. Shortly after his surgery, his Mother went on a vacation to Hawaii. She said he couldn't stay alone at her place and his step-mother had guests over and said "it was too much for her to handle". So, his Mother booked him a hotel room at Extended Stay in Woodland Hills, across from Taft School, which he despised. He had one visitor, Gavin. And ruminated over his plan to kill. (page 123)

    After his Mother returned, he went back to his Mothers, to stay till he was able to not use crutches. He was there for a month and said it was "very relaxing". This is also when he saw Dr. Sophy and was prescribed the Respirdone. He mentions his Mom and Step-Mom were arguing, and took half the session, because the Step-Mom wouldn't let him recover at her house, earlier and Mom was angry.

    Page 126: After he had a walking cast and cane, "Before long, my Mother said I was now well enough to return to Santa Barbara" He then said she told him he could come back in two weeks for a visit. He said she 'made' me leave.


    http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2014/05/25/us/shooting-document.html?_r=0
     
  6. jjenny

    jjenny Well-Known Member

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    I think it's a fair guess he was unpleasant to have around. Mother was likely made to wait on him hand and foot if he found it "very relaxing."
     
  7. Zuri

    Zuri Well-Known Member

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    Thank you for the correction. My brain is not as good as it once was. I found his perception of things so profoundly screwed, it has boggled my mind. :seeya:
     
  8. kaos

    kaos Active Member

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    That's what I can't get passed either. Many of us have no doubt told our children we wanted the best for them, they're our little princes/princesses etc but there are bound to be many children of real life millionaires, aristocracy, royalty etc who don't have the self entitlement belief that ER had. Where did it come from? Stories from his own imagination, stories related to him or words and images surrounding him?
     
  9. Flutterby80

    Flutterby80 Active Member

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    Yes didn't that kid sue his own parents or something? The root of much of of society's recent decline is lack of responsibility for oneself IMO. It's always somebody else's fault. I see it across all socioeconomic groups, races, cultures. It's a generational thing. Pretty sure my grandparents wouldn't have dreamed of blaming their parents/teachers/employers for their adult actions. And they wouldn't have put up with it from others either.

    ER is an extreme case of blame-shifting, but I see it in varying forms throughout society. For a society that seems so freaking self-obsessed, there doesn't seem to be a lot of true introspection going on.

    Sorry. Rant over.
     
  10. Tulessa

    Tulessa Well-Known Member

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    Oh sweetheart! A good mom NEVER gives up on her child. :( Bravo for you!
     
  11. Whiteorchids

    Whiteorchids Well-Known Member

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    Parents can't do much he was over 18.

    Too bad the friends didn't step up to the plate to alert the authorities. From what I read he relayed his violent thoughts of happy couples and the awful things he wanted to do to them and that's why they ended the friendships. I believe they had some responsibility to inform his parents and authorities. Who knows maybe they did. Maybe they didn't take his threats seriously. Authorities probably wouldn't have done anything anyway since only threats. It seems they don't do anything until someone is hurt.

    I can't believe that ER would actually follow and stalk some of these couples. He was a real whack job probably a psychiatrist worst nightmare. Some brains are just un-fixable
     
  12. Paladine

    Paladine Active Member

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    Zuri,

    I am a recovering addict since 1989 and the daughter of a recovering, now deceased, alcoholic. I know your pain. I know the pain I caused my parents. I, too, am bi-polar. I believe the love and support you give your son in recovery is to be commended. It's not easy to get clean and stay clean. Many relapse plenty of times before they finally have long periods of sobriety. But I've seen it happen, lives changed, again and again. As long as an addict is trying to stay clean, I believe family support should be there. I've seen more recover with support than without it. Again, my heart goes out to you...I admire your strength, addiction is one heck of a road.
     
  13. bettybaby00

    bettybaby00 Active Member

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    OMG yes.

    I would never claim to be a perfect parent but one thing that I really try to do is make my kids understand that they are responsible for their actions, and those actions often have consequences!!!

    I'm infuriated when I see parents intervening on behalf of their kids at school over EVERYTHING, and it's often b/c they don't want little Johnny to get into trouble, even when they deserve it.

    When I was in school and got into trouble, I didn't go home and try to whine to my parents, b/c then I would have had to face the punishment at school as well as receive more punishment from my parents!
     
  14. Disguiseduser0308

    Disguiseduser0308 New Member

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    I have to agree. He comes across as a vampire of a friend. He sucks the lifeblood right out of people. I get the feeling his friends tried their best. The soul suck ER was, it was just impossible not to be brought down by it.

    ER truly was his own worst enemy. Where most young men would feel a twinge of envy of their friend having a new girl -- most would chime in with the all too famous question "does she have a sister, friend, cousin etc. for me. ER instead turned everyone into enemies. I'm mentally exhausted just by his stories. I didn't even know the guy.
     
  15. Flutterby80

    Flutterby80 Active Member

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    He talked about his Facebook "stalking accounts" like it was perfectly normal. He would feed his own anger and resentment by following people he was jealous of on social media. There is always a point while participating in a WS thread that the thought occurs to me that, here is one dude who outed himself. How many others like him are out there?

    How many Ariel Castros? How many abusive elementary school teachers? How many Boston Marathon bombers? How many highway snipers?

    How many Elliot Rodgers?

    Then I usually lose a couple of nights' sleep, because it truly scares me how many depraved, disturbed, or just delusional people are living among us. People with a very fragile hold on their self-control.
     
  16. bettybaby00

    bettybaby00 Active Member

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    I meant that I would hope that his shrink would have voiced their concerns when the plans for college were being made (I'm assuming he went right out of HS?).

    Even if he went later, his therapist was obligated to inform if he really presented as dangerous. He seemed to have manipulation down to an art form.

    The friends alerting someone could have proven to be very beneficial, but that takes a lot of guts. Idk if most kids that age would do that. IDK :(
     
  17. Disguiseduser0308

    Disguiseduser0308 New Member

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    Honestly, I think ER's friends were so exhausted trying to deal with him. I've known people like this just not anywhere near as bad. They really suck the life right out of you. Even just being in their presence.

    They probably do wish they had went to authorities about his rantings. I know I would. :(
     
  18. Flutterby80

    Flutterby80 Active Member

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    Plus, I imagine he didn't give off the vibe of actually having the guts to go through with it. He probably seemed like a whiny little b@#$&, all hot air. I doubt they took him seriously.
     
  19. Disguiseduser0308

    Disguiseduser0308 New Member

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    Wow, finally finished the manifesto. I need a nap now. The end is terrifying. I felt true anxiety when he talks about his dream to place all women in concentration camps and starve them to death.

    You were your own worst enemy ER. You really and truly were.
     
  20. Elley Mae

    Elley Mae Well-Known Member

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    bbm I would be willing to bet at least 1 in every public school in this country,usa. A few years ago I worked in a elementary school, there were 3 kids that had an aide with them from the time they got off the bus till they got back on the bus.
     
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