Deceased/Not Found CA - Heidi Planck, 39, left son’s football game in Downey, dog found in Los Angeles, 17 Oct 2021 #4

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I don’t think anyone here is shaming her? That is true though, that no one should be shamed or ridiculed for getting treatment. Are you referring to the court filings? But practically and logistically speaking, shouldn’t a child be entitled to a more stable home life if it’s an option - while a parent is in treatment, working out meds, getting things back together?

No, I don't believe anybody is shaming her here. I mean in the filed documents, he is clearly trying to use mental illness as a reason to gain full custody, citing that she checked herself into a hospital. If that is the case, then she sought treatment when she needed to rather than be forced by probate. That shows good judgement and insight. If she were to have brittle diabetes, would that be grounds for the father to be awarded full custody? Sometimes diabetics are hospitalized but I bet nobody tries to use it against them in a custody matter. The stigma is unfortunate and it prevents many people from seeking help.
The child should absolutely be in a safe place if or when mom needs treatment and only during that time - then back to 50/50. He clearly loves mom and they have a close bond. Close enough that dad wants therapy for him.
 
Totally own opinion, but I’ve shared before that in my experience, this kind of language is common for children who have grown up with separated parents, or divorced when the child was very young. Saying “dad” kind of implies a personal relationship between the mother and the dad, and it can be awkward and unnatural. “My dad” and “my mom” is reflective of the separation, separate households. It’s kind of like how you wouldn’t refer to a brother as “brother” to a friend. You’d say “my brother” because the friend doesn’t share a relationship with the brother.
Agree!!
 
We have to take this with a grain of salt. Like many custody battles, a lot of claims are made, complete lack of any context, and nobody has to prove or substantiate any of them. I am not sure what to believe. We know that her ex husband was not granted sole custody so perhaps the court couldn't substantiate that she was as dangerous as these documents indicate.

In my mind this adds an ongoing (bitter) custody battle to the mix as well as the possibility any of these mental health accusations might be true.

I agree with this 150%.
 
I very much doubt that JWs accusations are true. There may be a grain of truth like she has a prescription for Adderall but he's not been 100% truthful. He said Heidi is a good mother too. Once again which is it? MOO
I'm sure that there is truth to these accusations. There's probably a police report from the day the neighbors called LE when HP was turning on and off the breaker. JW could get into a lot of trouble if he was caught lying to the court.
 
Ok, so who here knows how custody agreements work? The night of the neighbor incident and then her checking herself into treatment shortly after the fact I can see as being enough for temporary full custody...probably not for two years as it shows one incident whether mentally ill episode, drug/drinking effects or a combo of the both. But that just seems like it's the only main incident they have actual proof of and other witnesses etc...is that not enough for full custody for two years? Bc that is pretty long for one incident and if so, then why say all of the other personal accounts, incidents, behavior, phone calls etc. as well?

OR did he add all of the other stories bc the one incident is not enough and so he thought or was advised he needed to make his case bulkier to get full custody a greater amount of time as opposed to just temporary? If so, that is kind of scary considering what proof do they have of any of the things he said? Unless somehow in her declaration she said they were all true? Surely they don't have investigators trying to track down the three doctors prescribing her, or the Fat Burger (where I am guessing no police report was made) or getting phone records to see if that is what she said from the facility (also, why even add that detail...she is in a psychiatric facility why would that make her look more mentally ill?)

I guess I am just saying that both alternatives would be terrifying...if you could have one bad incident that there is proof of and did the right thing and got help that you could lose your child for 2 years and equally that if the one time was not enough but all of the other allegations and stories (if untrue) your ex made that could not be realistically substantiated could be enough of the icing on the cake of the one reported incident. But at the same time, most domestic incidents like that you are not able to provide proof of unless you are literally recording and videoing every single thing.

DM just released the ones about HP but from JWs point of view so I would love if we could see if HP agreed or had a rebuttal or even if she had a series of complaints/issues with him type of thing and we are only seeing one side. You can easily find them and there are plenty declaration reports from both parties so what we are hearing is just one of his and his so just would be interesting to see anything from her side.
 
No, I don't believe anybody is shaming her here. I mean in the filed documents, he is clearly trying to use mental illness as a reason to gain full custody, citing that she checked herself into a hospital. If that is the case, then she sought treatment when she needed to rather than be forced by probate. That shows good judgement and insight. If she were to have brittle diabetes, would that be grounds for the father to be awarded full custody? Sometimes diabetics are hospitalized but I bet nobody tries to use it against them in a custody matter. The stigma is unfortunate and it prevents many people from seeking help.
The child should absolutely be in a safe place if or when mom needs treatment and only during that time - then back to 50/50. He clearly loves mom and they have a close bond. Close enough that dad wants therapy for him.
I think if a parent is unable to care for a child during their custody time, and other arrangements can’t be made because supportive family lives out of state (as in HP’s case) - then yes, I would hope custody would be changed temporarily to accommodate the child. Children need to be driven to and from school on time, they need to be fed, they have to get to bed at certain times, etc. it’s not easy. I’m not sure there’s discrimination here toward the specifics of her struggles. If a cancer patient was totally alone and needing help taking care of a child, I’m sure temporary custody arrangements could be made. JMO
 
Ok, so who here knows how custody agreements work? The night of the neighbor incident and then her checking herself into treatment shortly after the fact I can see as being enough for temporary full custody...probably not for two years as it shows one incident whether mentally ill episode, drug/drinking effects or a combo of the both. But that just seems like it's the only main incident they have actual proof of and other witnesses etc...is that not enough for full custody for two years? Bc that is pretty long for one incident and if so, then why say all of the other personal accounts, incidents, behavior, phone calls etc. as well?

OR did he add all of the other stories bc the one incident is not enough and so he thought or was advised he needed to make his case bulkier to get full custody a greater amount of time as opposed to just temporary? If so, that is kind of scary considering what proof do they have of any of the things he said? Unless somehow in her declaration she said they were all true? Surely they don't have investigators trying to track down the three doctors prescribing her, or the Fat Burger (where I am guessing no police report was made) or getting phone records to see if that is what she said from the facility (also, why even add that detail...she is in a psychiatric facility why would that make her look more mentally ill?)

I guess I am just saying that both alternatives would be terrifying...if you could have one bad incident that there is proof of and did the right thing and got help that you could lose your child for 2 years and equally that if the one time was not enough but all of the other allegations and stories (if untrue) your ex made that could not be realistically substantiated could be enough of the icing on the cake of the one reported incident. But at the same time, most domestic incidents like that you are not able to provide proof of unless you are literally recording and videoing every single thing.

DM just released the ones about HP but from JWs point of view so I would love if we could see if HP agreed or had a rebuttal or even if she had a series of complaints/issues with him type of thing and we are only seeing one side. You can easily find them and there are plenty declaration reports from both parties so what we are hearing is just one of his and his so just would be interesting to see anything from her side.
As has been discussed before, courts usually order extensive evaluations of the situation(s) (can be ordered more than once throughout a case). They appoint a mediator (usually a social worker or psychologist) to interview third parties, the children, collect records, etc. It’s not made totally on a whim or by favoritism toward a certain parent. Is it perfect? Of course not. But the focus is on the children’s best interest in a custody issue, not a parent’s.
 
I think some of you are confusing legal custody with physical custody. Legal custody means you are the decision maker, not that you have the kid full time. You can still have sole custody and share parenting time 50/50. The only time parents have joint custody is when they have an agreement to do so. A judge doesn't typically assign joint custody because if the parents could agree on anything, they wouldn't be in court. So the judge assigns sole custody to one parent based on a number of factors and does not mean the other party is a bad parent. The father probably needs sole custody at this point to be able to make decisions without the missing parent (therapy, school, travel, etc.).
 
I think some of you are confusing legal custody with physical custody. Legal custody means you are the decision maker, not that you have the kid full time. You can still have sole custody and share parenting time 50/50. The only time parents have joint custody is when they have an agreement to do so. A judge doesn't typically assign joint custody because if the parents could agree on anything, they wouldn't be in court. So the judge assigns sole custody to one parent based on a number of factors and does not mean the other party is a bad parent. The father probably needs sole custody at this point to be able to make decisions without the missing parent (therapy, school, travel, etc.).
Excellent distinction!
 
Sorry for the delayed reply. According to this DM article:

10/20: JW went directly to the police station after picking up his son to file the MP report.

10/21: JW asked police to perform a welfare check at her home, and police plus the landlord went through the empty house.

10/26: JW files the Request for Order for full custody with the court

Ex-husband of Heidi Planck shares texts from their 11-year-old son as he is granted full custody | Daily Mail Online

I guess even though the MP was filed on 10/20, the LAPD did not post the bulletin until later—10/27, did you say? I think you’re right to wonder why they waited that long.
Thank you! I’ve lost track of Docs we’ve seen here.
Did we post the MP report itself? ? It was filed on 10/21.
 
Just a few thoughts I have so far: The released documents are the ex-husband's accusations and his point of view. I'll take it with a grain of salt.
Secondly, I really wish our society would recognize that checking oneself into a mental facility should be encouraged as needed instead of ridiculed and shamed. If she checked herself in during a crisis, that shows good judgement and insight on her part and should never be used against her.
Thank you for writing this. I totally agree. There is absolutely no shame in asking for help for a physical or mental issue. I applaud her for recognizing she needed help and taking steps to resolve it.
 
Thank you for writing this. I totally agree. There is absolutely no shame in asking for help for a physical or mental issue. I applaud her for recognizing she needed help and taking steps to resolve it.
BBM.
Yes, @waldojabba, I too applaud HP for seeking the help she needed.
Off topic:
When I sat through a contentious custody battle – embarrassingly my own with my former husband –the judge declared:
"This is the first case over which I have presided when I must consider awarding custody of the parents to the children."
 
I'm sure that there is truth to these accusations. There's probably a police report from the day the neighbors called LE when HP was turning on and off the breaker. JW could get into a lot of trouble if he was caught lying to the court.
I understand but his perceptions may not be reality and we don't have all the info. IMO the courts don't always get it right. MOO
 
The missing person report has not been posted by MSM or LE, so we cannot post it or discuss it here. Private conversation is available for things like that. jmo

Thank you! I was looking earlier, trying to find it here, but could not remember if it had found its way onto MSM. So much hasn't, it is hard to remember what has.
 
I very much doubt that JWs accusations are true. There may be a grain of truth like she has a prescription for Adderall but he's not been 100% truthful. He said Heidi is a good mother too. Once again which is it? MOO

Using Adderall (even illegally) and being a good mother are not mutually exclusive. (Some of the best anesthesiologists and trial lawyers use and abuse narcotics and amphetamines, by way of analogy). JMO.
 
Using Adderall (even illegally) and being a good mother are not mutually exclusive. (Some of the best anesthesiologists and trial lawyers use and abuse narcotics and amphetamines, by way of analogy). JMO.
Absolutely. And since HP has been missing, JW has never once said publicly that HP was anything but a great mother.
 
CBS News never officially revealed the source of the leaked video of JS leaving muffins off at HP’s home, correct?

In the initial release of footage, the CBS reporter simply states that CBS “obtained” the footage, but that neighbors identified the man delivering the muffins as JS.

More Video Evidence Found in Heidi Planck Case

If the footage were intentionally released by law enforcement, … why?

ETA: Also, it is probably irrelevant, but who would have been the one to first come across the muffins on the doorstep if they were placed there one or two days after she vanished? JW on October 21 when he claimed to pick up her electronics?

New Heidi Planck clues revealed from odd text to her multiple phones and strange behavior when she was last seen - California News Times
 
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According to JW in the court filings, Heidi had, at least for a while, an addiction to Adderall.

Wayne said his ex-wife was addicted to the amphetamine, Adderall. He claimed she would go to three different doctors so she could get three separate prescriptions, making sure she always paid for two of them in cash so her abuse wouldn't be discovered.'

In the Missing Person report he filed, JW stated that Heidi was currently taking Adderall for ADD. If she really had been abusing Adderall, maybe she was beginning to again? Might that explain her presence at H+F? Perhaps she was no longer able to get them as she had been. I know that college kids around here seem to have easy access to them, especially at exam time, so I assume they could be easily gotten on the street in LA as well, and we have read or heard from Yelp reviews that drugs were not at all uncommon in the high rise. Btw, Adderall may cause or worsen psychosis in users with mental illness or Bipolar Disorder, and many in here have opined that Heidi may suffer from BD, though we have never been told that. JMO

Missing mom Heidi Planck had history of psychotic breakdown | Daily Mail Online


I have shared my story on a couple of other cases, but not this one yet. However, with the mention of Adderall...

My step-son was prescribed Adderall for ADD. I will say now and forever, I HATE THIS DRUG!!! Within a couple of years, he began to abuse it. He had graduated HS by then and had moved out on his own. We didn't realize he was abusing it until some very concerning signs. His GF at the time asked if we thought he was acting strange, and we saw the signs of a mental break. Within hours, I took him to the doctor and he was diagnosed with Adderall induced psychosis. He had taken so much Adderall, it had become toxic to his system. They flushed his system with a lot of fluids, and he had to go "cold turkey" on the Adderall instead of stepping down. We saw an almost immediate change for the good in him. The doctor warned us that if he used and/or abused Adderall again, we may not get his mind back. 2 years down the road, we unfortunately ended up in the same situation. He began to act strange, not rational. We tried for 6 weeks to get him help to no avail. He was driving to work every day, but there was definitely something wrong!! Long story short, he was abusing the Adderall again. He is now in a facility and we will find out soon if his mind is permanently broken or not. He exhibits signs of schizophrenia including paranoia, hearing voices, and mania. Truth be told, we are not sure if the schizophrenia was there before and he was trying to quiet the voices, or if it was brought on by the abuse of Adderall. Either way, mental health is a crisis in America. It is hard to get help for adults especially because they often times do not think they are sick.
 
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