Discussion: Why are Terri's friends Acting this way.

Discussion in 'Kyron Horman' started by Kat010, Aug 7, 2010.

  1. Kat010

    Kat010 Former Member

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    Per grandmaj's suggestion, a thread to discuss in general why people are doin' what they're doing--or not doin'. Such as getting cell phones for TH, who talks to media and when/where/how. All those discussions tagging along with other topics.

    Discuss. :waitasec:
     
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  3. Nana46

    Nana46 Runs with Scissors

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    I simply cannot imagine any of this. I think of my closest friends and still cannot imagine purchasing a cell phone for them especially with fake names...and why so many phones? One lady said she bought one for herself? Well duh...........what else would she say. I guarantee you if I had been at the house with TH my hubby would surely of told me to come home and stay out of it,lol. I am just baffled by all of this and not knowing whether anything I read is actual or misstated or to quote Cindy Anthony....mis-remembered,lol
    This poor little guy is somewhere and it just looks like all of this was going on around his home instead of them trying to talk or help or something...I am babbling....so will hush now........people just never cease to amaze me.:banghead:


    ETA: If I am this frustrated a zillion miles from Portland I can only imagine the poor LE in this case....nightmare they have to deal with.
     
  4. grandmaj

    grandmaj Former Member

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    OK I just took out one word because if we leave it General the whole case could come in. Let's talk in General terms and theory about why people have responded and acted the way they have........ 10-4? Good Job.
     
  5. SurfieTX

    SurfieTX New Member

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    I think Emma's post did a fine job of summing up varying speculations.

    [ame="http://www.websleuths.com/forums/showpost.php?p=5493803&postcount=318"]http://www.websleuths.com/forums/showpost.php?p=5493803&postcount=318[/ame]



    I actually have a friend like that. The thing is, her husband was (and still is) and dear friend of mine. To hear her talk about her husband/my friend, you would think he was the devil incarnate; however, being that I know him and know her very, very well, I've seen them BOTH act like idiots and push each other's buttons.

    The truth with them, shall we say, lies in the middle. I never believe his side of things nor her's - I just surmise.

    But, for the longest time, I was suckered into her version of their marriage to and including having her come and live with me. I was caught - hook, line and sinker.
     
  6. SurfieTX

    SurfieTX New Member

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    In addition, using my retroscope, I imagine I was caught hook, line and sinker because my life was, well, boring. It was kind of exciting, I guess, to have some drama around. (BELIEVE ME, I've changed). Maybe that was the case for her "good friends" too.
     
  7. Kat010

    Kat010 Former Member

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    Thanks, grandmaj!

    So why did friends go buy bat phones, and under fake names?

    Why did KH early on instruct co-workers not to talk to media?

    Why isn't TH screaming "I'm innocent" from the roof tops?

    Why is one of KH's management-type co-workers involved in the phone gang (as I read it, if wrong, please let me know!).

    etc.

    We've got lots of snippets of good discussions about issues scattered throughout other topics. So let's have at those things here and that way we can keep all trains on their appropriate tracks. Ya know, we don't want the Philly Fliier heading to Miami.

    As for why they're acting this way, here's my big question. KH, DY, etc. have all shared all kinds of personal details. But why won't KH tell anyone, or answer when asked, how he met TH? I think that's an attempt to cover up something that may be part of how this whole mess evolved. And possibly he's something that will take the focus off TH as sole Mistress of Evil and reveal something more about KH that may taint his current image. The fact that he won't discuss how they met, when they've all discussed how he had an affair with her while still married to and living with a pregnant DY, to me is really really hinky.

    Why are TH's friends so loyal? Especially whe, according to DY and KH, she's a liar and a problem? Why the disconnect between the differing accounts, and why is the difference so huge? Are there others than DY & KH, and TY, who agree that TH is all this bad stuff. As many as there are friends standing by her?
     
  8. Kat010

    Kat010 Former Member

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    And, per Nana's post, why did MC interject himself into the case? Why did he & TH start up that sexting thing?
     
  9. Emma Peel

    Emma Peel Keep your bowler hat on in times of trouble, & bew

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    I was asked to bring this post over from the cell phone thread, where I'd originally posted it. :blushing:

    Re: Secret Cell Phone-Gate.

    Without a doubt, these women were motivated to go out of their way to "help" Terri, in spite of the enormous and widely publicized suspicion.

    Why?

    That's what I want to know. What motivated them?

    **************
    Speculating:
    This "bad marriage thing" had been going on for some time. Terri's "friends" knew about the relationship difficulties for some time - and knew enough to be motivated to come to her rescue. They may well have only "known" what Terri wanted them to "know".

    Speculating:
    Kaine was NOT clueless about it. (He couldn't be, IMO - his appeals for early privacy were all about protecting his personal relationship challenges - naive as that might have been at the time.) He could have been accustomed to denying such problems. Wondering how long it took Kaine to speak frankly with investigators about his marital relationship woes?

    Speculating:
    Kaine was avidly protecting his family's privacy early on because he didn't want the difficulties of the marriage relationship to color or slow down the massive response & hunt for Kyron. Kaine could NOT fathom that Terri would ever take her issues to the level of hurting any child. Even if Desiree could.

    Speculating:
    Kaine's bigger nightmare began when he finally believed Terri might go that far - once he learned of the murder-for-hire plot.

    Speculating:
    Terri's ill will towards Kaine had reached the ears of her supportive friends a long time prior to Kyron disappearing. They were already supportive of her. They were aligned with Terri's plight when Kyron disappeared and honestly believed it was appropriate to support their friend Terri during these very frightening accusations from Kaine, the man they knew through Terri's eyes.

    Speculating:
    Kaine and Desiree knew of these phantom phone issues some time ago - which prompted their belief in the "Terri's had friend helping her stash Kyron" theory. A hopeful theory at best, which has more recently been dashed by said friend's testimonies to investigators - as to their reasons for helping Terri.

    Speculation:
    The friends know nothing about Kyron's disappearance, except what Terri's told them - something akin to: first a bad marriage, now a missing child - how could so many bad things happen to Terri?

    Speculating:
    Desiree and Kaine's recently heightened emotions during public appearances were about being briefed that these friends of Terri's weren't helping her with anything related to Kyron. Terri's friends believed, instead, they were supporting their friend Terri during a nightmare breakup of a marriage they already knew was sour, where their friend Terri was unfairly being cast as scapegoat for everything.

    All speculation, of course.

    At the end of Cell-Phone-gate we'll find a bunch of normally normal folk (Terri's "friends") caught up unawares in the outer layers of a quietly toxic- turned-deadly family dynamic.

    IMO at the root of all of this is Terri's neediness, narcissim, deception and manipulation, and Kaine's tendency towards avoidance, denial, and carefully guarded privacy.
     
  10. Haeve

    Haeve Fear my Google-Fu

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    Slightly O/T, but when I had a friend who complained incessantly about her boyfriend. I finally ran out of patience and said, "Why don't you just leave him then?"

    I've helped another friend twice escape from a bad relationship with a boyfriend (two different guys). I also called her on it when she later mentioned meeting one of these men for lunch. This was after several friends helped her change the locks. At some point, you have to realize that the relationship issues aren't always all the guys' fault. And the woman has to take some responsibilty for her decision-making and poor choices. But apparently in some circles there are these "girl rules" where you are always supportive of your friends, no matter what. I'm not one of those girls.

    I realize when one is married that "just leaving" isn't such an easy option. With my married friends' marriage issues, I help them find solutions, but they also don't paint an "all bad" image of their dear husbands. But if their marriages were as bad as all that, I'd probably say the same thing. Would I help them sneak around LE in a situation like this? Not bloody likely. But then I have no idea what was really going on in the Horman household. JMHO, YMMV.
     
  11. gitana1

    gitana1 Verified Attorney

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    I am very supportive of my friends and I can see rushing to their side or defense quickly and wholeheartedly. I can see myself defending them publicly because I cannot imagine one of my friends doing anything as horrible as harming a child. But, I cannot see giving them cellphones to avoid LE scrutiny, in connection with the investigation into the disappearance of a little kid.
    Also, as time went on, if they acted a certain way or evidence began piling up, I feel I would be able to rationally assess the situation and revisit my support/defense if need be.
    I have a friend who was accused of doing something immoral/illegal. She gave me her version. Knowing her problems and being able to use logic, I soon saw she probably did do what she was accused of (it involved drugs). So, while my love for my friends is steadfast, I believe that if there was evidence or signs that something was wrong, i would see it and adjust my conduct accordingly.
    I think that's not necessarily a quick process though. I have seen cases where inborn loyalty causes people to publicly support someone even while doubts are beginning to mount.
    One thing I know I would NEVER do and that is to obstruct justice in any way, for anyone.
     
  12. Haeve

    Haeve Fear my Google-Fu

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    I had a friend who, unbeknownst to her, had a friend use her as a rental reference claiming she was her landlord's wife! She gets a call from the new rental agency the minute she steps in the door from an overseas trip. She doesn't have time to think and gives the friend a positive reference. The info gets back to the landlord. Long story short, she got kicked out of her home of ten years. (They had the same landlord.) She thought she was helping her friend, who had a few "issues", including some with the current landlord, but was trying to make a fresh start of things.

    Yes, she knows she screwed up bigtime. The landlord's wife even considered having her charged with impersonating her. (Not sure what the actual legal definition would be.) And given some time to think, she would likely not have helped with the subterfuge. She's a highly moral person, but made a snap decision in an "emergency". I wonder if that's what is going on with TH's friends. And no, she's not friends with that person anymore.
     
  13. Dee10

    Dee10 New Member

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    ITA - there are many ways to actually help or support a friend in need without trying to / or obstructing justice...good grief.
     
  14. gliving

    gliving Just the facts, ma'am

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    Being of the mind that an intruder might have done this, why didn't the family speak out about the lax security at the school? If I were innocent, one of the first things I would do would be to call a news channel and give a lengthy spiel about the need for increased security in our schools.

    How can Desiree be so sure, so quickly, from the first phone call, that Terri was to blame? It's like she never gave a thought to any other possibility. It's like she knew?

    And it's more than ice running through her lying veins.


    Also, I recently had a very good friend confide to me they were having an affair. Of course he went on to say bad things about his wife. I told him I didn't really want to talk about it and could only suggest he take the high road. Come clean to his wife and together work on resolving the matter.
     
  15. Mandy113

    Mandy113 New Member

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    I love my friends but no way would I get involved with helping any of them with something like getting them cell phones to avoid LE scrutiny. I can't imagine any of them helping me that way either. I also agree with the posters who stated when our friends tell us the details of their relationship issues, the truth often lies somewhere in the middle.

    My impression of TH is she knows how to present the image people want to see. She knows how to manipulate people and use them to get what she wants. So the friends someone like this would choose to have are people who are needy, missing something from their lives, naive, they enjoy drama .... I don't know, but people that meet her needs. Our friendships fulfill a need for human contact & connection that we all crave. I doubt TH's friendships were the healthy, mature type you'd expect from a woman, a mother, of her age. So it was easy for her to get these people to help her out.

    Many people here were clearly operating under their own agendas. Unfortunately, Kyron was not their top priority.

    All of this is simply my own opinion & speculation.
     
  16. nursebeeme

    nursebeeme Registered User

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    my biggest problem with the friends' behavior is that they purchased these phones with a fake name AFTER Kyron went missing. AFTER Terri was the last seen with him and her face plastered all over the fliers. AFTER a lot of other things too numerous to name.

    I can see if she had a bad marriage previously and confided in her friends they would help her... but after all of the afore stated?

    In one media article one of the friends admitted it was stupid (buying phone with a fake name). I am sure all of her friends are finding their actions rather "stupid" at this time.

    MOO
     
  17. gardeness

    gardeness New Member

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    When I think about the friend buying the cell phones, I think...why not? Apparently, one does not have to show an ID to buy this type of phone... I don't know how I would react in Terri's situation (and I am giving her the benefit of the doubt that she is wrongly accused at this time), but I might do the same. I might ask my friend to buy me an anonymous cell phone so that I can converse freely, without worrying that every word I am saying will be analyzed and over-analyzed... JMO Right now, I don't see any relevance of the cell phones, but if I see some proof of criminal activity within the texts (if there are texts), I'll change my mind...
     
  18. AbbieNormal

    AbbieNormal Runs With Scissors

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    Years ago when I was working full time I had several "good" friends and of course working 11-7 we had time to sit around and BS about our lives, some of their stories were pretty racy, and while it was fine for me to listen to their drama at work I frankly had no desire to be "friends" with most of them outside of work, hey I have my own family drama and don;t need to get involved in the drama of others.
    I can see bored people get "into" the stories and tales of one person, that being Terri, and her tales of woe bad marriage, problems with her teenage son, raising another mans kid and having to "deal" with his ex wife (she probably had a few choice names fo Desiree too, I'm betting) on a regular basis, plus being the mom of an 18 month old, trying to get her body back (maybe her friends thought Terri had some kind of 'celebrity status' since she placed 4th in a bodybuilding contest) etc Maybe when they saw an opportunity to help their good friend Terri, they threw all common sense aside and did what they could.
    The phones, DeDe advising Terri to do this and that which according to some reports was against the best interests of Kyron (why would she do that, anyway?). At what point did these friends think, whoa, maybe Terri is guilty of this? Or have they thought that at all yet? What would cause them to take Terris side when to the rest of us Terri looked so much like the guilty party from the get-go? As well as LE suspecting her for the start since they announced to the public there was nothing to be concerned about regarding their children. In other words, "we know who perpetrated this crime."
    Were her friends just "dense"? Were they steadfastly loyal to Terri for some reason? Did they know Terri had a history of being a lair? Did Terri tell them such animated lies they were just transfixed with her "exciting" life and thats what drew them to her?


    (JMO)
     
  19. debirlfan

    debirlfan New Member

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    It's possible that TH was having an affair before Kyron disappeared, and her friends knew it - and that she convinced the friends that was why she needed the phones - to talk to the boyfriend.
     
  20. jessicat

    jessicat New Member

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    I cannot for the life of me understand this. I feel so bad for Kyron and for DY, TY, and KH and extended family. What is wrong with TH and her cohorts? This is a child, a sweet innocent child. I will never understand I don't think. Children are precious. Kyron is so loved and missed and these women may know what happened to him or perhaps are responsible for what happened to him and they just go on, smirk at the camera's etc. If DD knows what happened she needs to say something. These cases break my heart. Unfortunately I think Kyron is no longer with us and I hope he knew he was loved by many. If TH did do something to him and DD and others know they should be punished to the full extent of the law. Why are they protecting her? Don't they have a heart? I'll say it again..This is a child! What do they know about TH both before Kyron disappeared and after that they are willing to lie like this, lies that have serious consequences?! I am a loyal person and would do almost anything for my closest friends, family but I would not cover up for them when its something so serious like this. Sorry for my rant...I hope it makes some sort of sense. I'm just so tired of reading these stories where family is turning out to be responsible for these children, the very people these children trust the most. Please Lord, help bring home Kyron, Haleigh, Gabriel..all of these precious children.
     
  21. human

    human Well-Known Member

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    I felt badly for that one woman whose house was shown on the news (the one that has since moved).

    I no longer feel badly for her. What in the heck was she thinking?
     

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