Discussion in 'Up to the Minute' started by scorekeeper, May 12, 2013.
Makes sense to me
What next, for Petes sake!
The only things they're not doing is embalming and using concrete liners or having some funeral home people haul the body. Doing it all by hand and it still costs more than cremation!?
I come from a long line of morticians. They always talked about how the loved ones of the deceased felt compelled to spend large sums of money, no matter how hard the funeral director tried to argue for cheaper alternatives.
(In their own wills, they specified that they be cremated and deposited without ceremony. They were devout Christians, but they didn't believe God cared what kind of funeral was held.)
That fear of the survivors that they will be seen as "cheap", "disrespectful" or "unloving" (along with the greed of some industry workers) tends to drive up the prices for all of us.
As for "green" funerals or even cheap funerals, why not? The physical body is like a suit of old clothes. The loved one isn't there to "wear" it after death.
That doesn't answer txsvicki's question and assumes that the only opinion here (moticians) is truthful. Kind of like asking occupants of a prison their opinion of LE and validating that opinion.
I don't see anything in Nora's post to indicate that she thinks that the only valid opinion is that of a mortician.
I like this alternative. It is not new, it simply became obsolete as the funeral industry added fancier and more expensive products and services.
Land shortages in a few urban areas might necessarily need regulations requiring embalming or cement vaults to avoid large numbers of fresh bodies decomposing at the same time in a small area... I don't know, maybe not.
I say keep it simple. If money is short and cremation costs less than the labor required to hand dig a grave and fill it, so be it. I think cremation and "green" burial are both more practical than fancy caskets and elaborate services.
When my body dies I don't need it anymore. My body isn't me. Burn it, bury it or scatter ashes, whatever is most practical. Go through my closet and take whatever fits, give the rest to someone who needs it. Throw a BBQ in the back yard for the friends and relatives. Let the kiddos and dogs and kitties run around and play. Wear something comfortable and bring your favorite dish to share. Enjoy each other and know that I will meet you in Heaven!
That's just my opinion, no more important than anyone else's.
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long line of morticians -,They always talked about how
The whole post comes from a mortician's POV.
seems logical to me ... now if we can get to the point where the 'greener' alternative is less expensive ...
I've said in the past I don't want to be embalmed ...
Actually, I gave two answers:
1. The willingness of survivors to overpay because they don't want to appear cheap or unloving.
2. The willingness of unscrupulous morticians to overcharge grief-stricken survivors.
I cited my mortician grandparents because they saw more funerals than almost all of us put together. Their own burial instructions were intended to save their daughters from unscrupulous morticians. I have no idea why you decided I was saying only morticians or all morticians can be trusted. The point was NOT that all morticians are honest or to be trusted; that was not my grandparents' opinion of their competitors.
TGIRecovered, I'm sure there will still have to be regulations. Cities such as London and (particularly) Paris that have buried the dead willy-nilly have found themselves engulfed in eruptions of corpses.
(P.S. I'm a dude. No offense taken, but I don't want you to feel misled.)
Oopsie! I'm sorry I called you a she!
As for the London thing, eew! I wonder if their abundant rainfall contributes to the erupting... shifting mud and all. I live in a drought prone area of Texas. Our ground is dry and hard. Things tend to stay put if you bury them deep enough.
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What was perfect and incredible was that my Dad chose not only his casket, but literally everything about his funeral a good 10 years (more like 13 or so) before his death. And chose his plot. I went with him, and afterwards, we went and had a deli lunch. Yes, it was a weird day, but I was soooo grateful knowing that he had chosen and did it his way. It was paid in full, as much as we could pay in full at the time.
There were two additional costs, but I was prepared for that - the funeral person who handled Dad's contracts had noted them in his paperwork, so I was aware of and prepared for the two additional expenses that couldn't be prepaid.
Could Dad have had it less expensively? Sure...but he got what he wanted, and as he said, "since I'm chosing it, I'll pay for it...and you won't have to worry about it that way, either".
I will say watching him "try on" caskets was a bit...well...bizarre. But if you knew my Dad, you'd understand that was actually quite normal for him. He was a cool dude. I miss him.
My point is simply that if someone has already prepared their funeral and chosen their plot and casket, then who is anyone else to change that and do something else? If someone wants to be cremated (like my Mom), then that's what we'll do...and scatter her ashes as she asks us to.
I think a lot of things happen because folks don't talk about death, and so the survivors are not prepared for it; because of that, there is pressure to do it "right", whatever that means. That allows unscrupulous folks to take advantage of things, but I also believe that there are a lot of good folk in the death industry (for lack of a better word).
As for a more ecological manner of burial, I'd like to see those who can and want to be interred on family land in rural areas, be allowed to do so. Right now, I don't believe you can bury on private property without a permit. Now, I don't see this happening in Los Angeles, but say out on a 150 acre plot in say Iowa? Sure, why not?
It's what families did for centuries...I don't see why it should not be done now.
Since I don't think being a woman is less than being a man, I promise you I was in no way offended. LOL.
Yes, the soggy climates were major factors. Also, Paris buried thousands of guillotine victims in the late 18th century (during the Revolution and Reign of Terror) and buried them quickly; the bodies started popping up again in the early 19th century. I believe that led to transporting the corpses to the catacombs, where their bones remain stacked today.
Great story, Herding Cat. My mother-in-law did the same, so her children wouldn't be burdened. What a lovely final gift from parents to their children!
hopefully ways to make a painful time far less costly than it is now. Methods in this article make plenty of sense to me.
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Most towns most likely require a cement liner and casket but pine boxes are available if people insist. Embalming may also be a requirement near towns. I'd like to donate my body to the body farm but no way would my family allow it.
Most towns and cemeteries require that because without a cement liner the ground can sink when the casket disintegrates. That either leaves a shallow pit that makes mowing difficult OR can be a liability risk if someone is walking and falls through breaking a leg or whatever.
I was shopping for life insurance this last week and the broker made me laugh regarding funeral expenses, I asked for a quote for 100k and he said "Is this for your final resting place?" I said "Yes! I plan to build a huge fancy mausoleum and since I ain't rich I will use life insurance fund it!" then said I was joking and could be cremated for a grand or two and the insurance was for my animals.
I do see the beauty in Victorian Cemeteries and can understand the value in that, leaving a lovely mausoleum or other works of art as a memorial to be enjoyed by generations. I can also see the meaning of being buried in a family plot, following ones ancestors etc... but unfortunately many burials today are lone individuals placed in cemeteries and rarely visited for long by those that knew them.
I really dislike the idea of embalming my used up body so that generations down the line it is still somewhat preserved lying in a coffin that costs much more than most of the cars I have driven.
I have decided that cremation is the way to go.....I don't feel the need to have people look at my made up body after death....take the money and throw a BBQ or whatever kind of party the family that's left might enjoy.
In the county I live in you must have the cement liner and be embalmed. There are no "green" cemetaries. Most people spend $10,000 or more burying their loved ones. What a waste that could be used for something else that might be needed.
Agree. My wife passed last December and as per our plan, she was cremated. I gave instructions to my children that when I die, I'm cremated and our ashes will occupy the same urn so we'll always be together and they're welcome to join us. Very old school in some cultures.
I hate to tell you, Thunder, but my neighbor spent $10,000 cremating his husband a few years ago. He probably could have spent a thou or so if he had selected a cheaper urn, but even cremation is expensive unless one is very assertive and demands the cheapest option. (ETA I meant "saved a thou or so". He still would have spent many thousands of dollars.)
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