PARENTS KILLED AMBER ALERT ISSUED FOR 13-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER
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POLICE NEED PUBLIC'S HELP IN FINDING MISSING AND PREGNANT KIERRA COLES

FL - Family Tries To Get Marriage License For Pregnant 13yo To Marry 27yo

Discussion in 'Crimes-Spotlight on Children' started by VespaElf, Aug 1, 2010.

  1. VespaElf

    VespaElf Little Miss Showcase(runner-up)

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    LAKE PLACID - A Lake Placid man was arrested Thursday on allegations that he had sex more than once with a 13-year-old girl, which led to her getting pregnant.

    Pedro Valladares Martinez, 27, of Sudburry Drive, Lake Placid, was charged with lewd and lascivious acts on a victim 12 to 16 years of age.........<more at link>



    http://www2.tbo.com/content/2010/jul/31/la-family-tries-to-get-marriage-license-for-13-yea/
    A few thoughts I will try to pose as delicately as possible.......

    HER parents were behind trying to get the license.
    The sex occurred multiple times at HER residence.

    I will bet you he's either a 'family friend' or a 'distant relative'.
    I would not be surprised if my assumption that this family is also hispanic is correct & that they may be here illegally and HE is legal.

    We keep seeing stories of very young hispanic girls impregnated by much older hispanic men with MULTIPLE family members being aware of the abuse & seemingly supportive of it.Why?Is this a rural,cultural thing ?
    Is this to secure green cards?

    Yes it happens across all ethnicities and with legal residents/citizens but ,& maybe it's just me,it seems like a pattern with it being hispanic families & I suspect we will hear more of these stories.


    I am trying to be delicate here & not offend but the girls keep getting younger & younger with the family looking the other way & it seems like it could be prevented if we could found out WHY it keeps happening.
    Has anybody else noticed this?
     
  2. Elphaba

    Elphaba Defying Gravity...

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    She's a baby having a baby, and her parents aren't protecting her. Have they lost their minds?!?!?!?! OMG!!!!!!
     
  3. LiveLaughLuv

    LiveLaughLuv New Member

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    These parents should be arrested for contributing to the deliquency of a minor. No 13 y/o should be having sex in the first place and since it's taking place at their home, they should be arrested!

    I don't know why but it seems children are having sex at such a young age, at 13 I was still playing with my Barbie dolls.

    Why are no boundries, morals and values instilled in young teens? Is it a cultural thing or just not caring enough to do what's right for your children. As a parent/grandparent, I want better for my children and have done a good job, if I say so myself. I spoke to my children about respecting themselves and their bodies. That you should wait for marriage to have sex. If they couldn't or didn't want to wait, then we spoke of contraseptives and to not get pregnant before you're ready. A forced marriage doesn't work out well and it's best to wait until you've matured enough to handle being a husband or wife. Bringing a child into the mix before you're ready can be a disaster, which is why I believe so many children suffer from child abuse. Children raising children seem to be what's going on in today's world...JMHO

    Could be this is all these parents know. Could be this was how they lived. I don't get it at all....JMHO
     
  4. Wise Old Owl

    Wise Old Owl Retired WS Staff & Founding member of AFKBPOFPOPL

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    ITA Vespaelf with your observations about the family possibly being illegal and the "groom" is LEGAL.

    It seems in the hispanic/latino culture that older men and "VERY" younger women is acceptable and condoned.

    I live surrounded by illegals - literally. My DH caught one of the men peeking in my 16 yr old DD's windows! :eek: He (my DH) was also approached by another of the "young" men who wanted to give my DD a picture he drew (full of hearts and I love you's). My DH said to him - you do know my DD is 16 - right? And the guy said yea and then DH asked him old how he was and he said "27". !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Needless to say, DH ran that guy off rather quickly and without incident although he did come inside and have to "cool off" for a few hours.

    If we, as Americans, don't get a handle on all this - we, as a country, are going to continue to decline as a society!!!!

    I hope CPS is investigating this and this poor girl can get out of this horrible situation.
     
  5. believe09

    believe09 Active Member

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    I am trying to digest your post-do you believe the men are attempting to lure your daughter so they can marry her and become "legal?" Or do you think they are trying to lure your daughter because in the culture they are from, the age difference is not a big deal?

    I guess I am confused as to how you know these men are not in the US legally?

    As to the family that is the subject of the story, I have heard this scenario from cultures outside of the Latin culture. It could be a religious belief that causes this reaction, or it certainly could be cultural. I wonder if the daughter marries, if she would then be an achor child who would hold the whole family here??? Am I making sense?
     
  6. Wise Old Owl

    Wise Old Owl Retired WS Staff & Founding member of AFKBPOFPOPL

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    First, I know they are here illegaly from various incidents, events that I've witnessed. I saw a man pull up in the front one day and they all gathered around - the guy "fanned" out social security cards and each one took one! On the east side of me - the building is 3 apartments. The back apartment houses (at any given time) 5 to 12 young men. The rotation of men in and out (there are basically 3 guys that stay all the time). Of those 3 - only 1 is legal and I've been told this by others that have "hung out" with these guys. The owner of the building - IMO is running a sanctuary house and that's why the constant rotation. All of these guys are alcoholics - witnessed by the actual drinking, staggering, and then the "emptying of the bottles and cardboard containers" the next morning. I counted one day and they brought out 25 12-pack empty containers. We had to install security cameras on our house - and through that I have watched the drug deals, the hookers, and of course "the bathroom" activities of all of them. These are from Guatamala and Houndruas and down there the sanitary systems are horrible - so they don't use a bathroom. They come outside and just do their business - last year they "wee-weed" all over my garden and ruined the entire garden.

    As for what these guys wanted to "do" with my DD - they just want to get their hands on her. I've watched the "gang" cat-call other girls that walk down the street. So, whether or not they are looking for a "marriage" or just that they like young girls doesn't matter to me. The age difference culturewise is obvious - they want younger girls and it seems to just be ok. We do have families further down the street. Once they have an "anchor" baby - everything kicks in. I watch everyday - these two women who have 7 kids between them and one is pregnant again. I've seen them in the grocery store swip their food stamp cards and then go to the desk to "western union" over $500. in cash back home.

    LE and local PD know all about this area and while they tell us that they will let ICE and INS know about it - nothing is ever done. Last year - one of the guys next door stabbed another one. LE came, the victim went to the hospital. I followed up with LE because the "stabber" was also the pedophile that was peeking in my DD's window - seems the victim refused to talk and wouldn't tell what happened or who did it. Why? Because he was illegal and knew the other was too - and they don't RAT. The victim never showed back up but the other one is still there and "livin' large".

    As for this family - it is very possible that once this girl is married, yes she will be legal - but once that baby is born - regardless of her status (married or not) that baby is a citizen and she, at least, will stay.
     
  7. believe09

    believe09 Active Member

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    Why not call INS yourself if that is your suspicion? Too bad your local LE is not cooperating.

    It is a misdemeanor offense to be in the USA illegally-akin to a traffic ticket. So deportation is expensive when you consider the fine for the offense itself.

    Speculation: In the case that started the thread-this little girl's baby may be an anchor baby that guarantees her continued presence in the US, but I dont know how it would work for her extended family. I would think that the desire to have her marry the man may be religious or cultural, depending on what they believe their status to be vs the man who raped their daughter. (She cannot legally consent and neither can her family on her behalf, so it is rape.) Perhaps they believed him to be a good catch and a good provider.

    It is immaterial-I dont believe that you can give permission for your daughter to marry at her current age in NY, and neither the family or the child can give consent to the sexual relations, to the point is moot. Dude is going to jail, and this is a case for CPS monitoring I would think. Poor little girl....babies having babies again.
     
  8. Thorkim

    Thorkim Member

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    I'm no prude, but I really wonder what the heck has happened to our family life and morals anymore. It is horrible that a 13 year old is pregnant by a 27 year old, but for the parents to appear to condone it is just unbelievable. I want to go back to the 50s sometimes.
     
  9. tiredofthis

    tiredofthis New Member

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    Maybe we are just hearing about this type of thing more due to media saturation? I feel this type of behavior as deplorable as it is, has always been around but we are made more aware of it now.

    What were her parents thinking? :furious:
     
  10. luthersmama

    luthersmama Active Member

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    This myth really needs to put away. Having a baby does not "guarantee" that an undocumented mother can stay. To the contrary, moms and babies are deported all the time. Google "anchor baby myth" to get the whole story. It is much more complicated than giving birth in the US.
     
  11. reportertype

    reportertype Dogs are awesome!

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    I think you are right.
     
  12. the seeker

    the seeker Well-Known Member

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    Coming from someone who is married into a hispanic family and living in an area with a large Mexican population...this IS NOT a cultural thing.....could be a way to get a green card; however, it is not typical for the culture to allow their thirteen year olds to get knocked up by much older men. Most of the Mexican families I know all involve the husband and wife being close in age, not the husband being much older...except for my husband and I; he is quite a bit older than me, but he is NOT Mexican, he is half Spanish.
     
  13. Kat

    Kat Kind words do not cost much

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    I agree seeker it is not cultural. In fact, I'm not sure that there is even a higher incidence of this happening in the Mexican culture than it is in other cultures within the USA. We just see it reported on more.

    This Mom and Dad need to be taken to task. So does the man who had illegal sexual relations with a child.

    Many years ago I read a study (it was after 2000 but before 2006) I just can't remember the date I'm sorry. The findings were that more than 60-70% of young teens that gave birth and received welfare for their child, had a child that was fathered by a much older man. The average age difference was about 15 to 20 years. So it's a problem here in the USA it's just not reported on and unless someone files a complaint no one is charged for the obvious crime. JMHO.
     
  14. Salem

    Salem Former Member

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    Kat - I do believe I read that same study. Iirc - it has to do with child support and teen age moms.

    I feel badly for this young lady and I hope things work out for her and her child. Will she keep the baby or put it up for adoption? At 13, you know so little about the world. I'm sure she wants to keep the baby because for 13 year olds, generally speaking, it all about the emotion, not the reality. Whatever happens, I hope she finds lots of support and things work out.

    Salem
     
  15. drip~drop

    drip~drop kiss a fuzzie

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    apparently they were thinking how grand it would be to be grandparents at the ripe age of 30.:banghead:
    That's all I'll say.
    Moo :cow:
     
  16. Nova

    Nova Active Member

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    It's certainly not a "Mexican thing." In Mexico, the average marriage age is over 23 for males and over 18 for females.

    http://www.wisegeek.com/how-has-the-average-age-at-marriage-changed-over-time.htm



    Nor, in general, is it a question of "morals." Those of us of a certain age remember when it was the Bible Belt (Appalachia, Deep South and parts of the West) where child brides were most common.

    Rather, like so many things, it's usually a question of economics. In agricultural economies, poor people need to have more children to help work the land. Girls work and work hard, but generally aren't as strong as their brothers and may be seen as economic liabilities to be "unloaded" as soon as possible.

    With industrialization--particularly when coupled with child labor laws--parents have fewer children and are better able to support those they have, including daughters. Moreover, when women are accepted as valuable members of the workforce, they require more education which further delays the age at which they marry.

    The world may be going to hell in a handbasket, but not because it's common to marry off 13-year-olds. On the contrary, the average marriage age has risen consistently over the past several decades. (See cite above.)
     
  17. OneLove

    OneLove New Member

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    Many of us can be thankful that we were raised in a 'space' where we simply weren't exposed to this sort of thing. That probably means we lived above abject poverty, our future options were not entirely bleak or hopeless, and we weren't surrounded by drug/alcohol/aid & entitlement addicted people.

    As to the 50's, isn't that around the time Jerry Lee Lewis married his 13 year old cousin and Elvis Presley imported a 14 year old for in-house easy sex? I do remember visiting Mississippi back then and seeing a celebration of a 13 year old's pregnancy because she would be marrying the baby-daddy when she turned the legal age of 14 just weeks before the baby was born and would then be "set" for life. The parents of the girl were wealthy owners of thousands of acres of rich Mississippe Delta farmland. I guess they figured their daughter's only option for a 'bright future' was by way of marriage and they were securing it early! *boggle*

    For the most part, I don't think this kind of thing is nearly as related to time in history as it is to factors in the lives of the victims, whatever the ethnicity. It is a socio-economic issue, and all the more reason to emphasize raising people out of poverty and hopelessness. We have seen that simply throwing people the bone of public aid (or mailbox income as some call it) has mostly created a generational sense of entitlement rather than a helping "hand up". Reform is a SERIOUS need in this country, for sure!
     
  18. Thorkim

    Thorkim Member

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    Just wanted to clarify my 50s comment. I was thinking about the 50s moms & dads on the TV shows like Leave it to Beaver and Father Knows Best, lol!
     
  19. OneLove

    OneLove New Member

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    That's too funny, Thorkim. :) I almost referenced those tv shows in my own post. My grown kids look at me blankly when I tell them I'm NOT June Cleaver, lol.
     
  20. Disguiseduser0308

    Disguiseduser0308 New Member

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    I'm married into a Mexican-American family. From what I know of their family history and meeting/knowing the last three generations, this kind of thing would never fly. I don't think I have ever seen a family more protective of one another. I haven't often felt that with my own, so it was welcoming to have met Dh's family and seeing just what family is supposed to be about.

    If some 27 year old male even looked funny at a minor in this family there would be he!! to pay. I'm not sure this is cultural at all. This sounds like parenting failure... something all ethnic backgrounds are unfortunate to suffer from.
     

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