Hating Valentine's Day (I'm starting to, as well.)

Discussion in 'Up to the Minute' started by Dark Knight, Feb 12, 2006.

  1. Dark Knight

    Dark Knight New Member

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    (AP) Last Feb. 14, Liz Tuccillo called directory assistance to get a phone number for a store. Big mistake.

    A message greeted her: "Happy Valentine's Day." It was the last thing Tuccillo — 43, single and the co-author of "He's Just Not That Into You" — wanted to hear.

    "It is a painful holiday," says Tuccillo, whose humorous 2004 best seller counseled women in dead-end relationships. "I'm looking up the phone number of a store, and I have to be reminded that I'm single!"

    Lots of people hate Valentine's Day. Many are single. But even people in committed relationships can have a rotten time.

    For some, it's because their partner, out of carelessness, forgetfulness or something worse, doesn't come through with that romantic gift or thoughtfully planned date. Others might be going through a difficult moment in their relationship. Valentine's Day is like a huge magnifying glass hovering over all those warts and pimples.

    http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060210/ap_en_ot/my_rotten_valentine&printer=1

     
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  3. indigomood

    indigomood New Member

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    [​IMG]

    The true purpose of the holiday typically called "Valentine's Day" is to provide tremendous economical boosts to the flower, chocolate and greeting card industries during the month of February (What, are you going to send your "true love" a Groundhog Day or Washington's Birthday card? I THINK NOT!)

    And forget Cupid! I mean really, a naked baby with wings shooting arrows at people? More creative things have been created by bad acid!

    To sum it up, Valentine's Day is a socially constructed concept created by mad scientists for the express purpose of adding stress that takes an additional 3 to 4 years off your life expectancy.


    V-Day 12-Step Program for non-daters

    Here's a quick guide to surviving Feb. 14

    -Wear black, and lots of it.

    -If someone else in the office has received flowers, chocolate, singing telegrams, and other forms of dating expressions, glare at them. Snarling and grunting optional.

    -Same goes for anyone wearing excessive amounts of red. Especially if they are wearing heart-shaped items like pins.

    -Later in the day, eat the chocolate, run the flowers through a food processor, and beat the crap out of the singing telegram people. (Most people will thank you for this, anyway).

    -For the rest of the day, labor over the effect all that chocolate is gonna have on your waistline.

    -Return home and destroy at least one item given to you by an ex. Feel guilty. Call the ex. Make up story about having a hot date.

    -Watch TV. Turn off TV after noticing every channel is airing a clone of "While You Were Sleeping," "Titanic," or, worse yet, a "Friends" Valentine's Day.

    -Realize how lame not having a hot date is. Head to bar.

    -Plot massive torture of anyone who shows up at the bar with a date. Slow torture if the couple is in anything above semi-formal dress.

    -Massive quantities of alcohol. Beergoggling. Wake up next to someone - male or female - with way too much facial hair.

    -Remember (and regret) this incident for the next 364 days. Complain about never having a good V-Day.

    -Note: If "Titanic" is on, it can be therapeutic. But only if you only watch the part where Leonardo DiCaprio sinks like a big, wet, adorable, lead anvil to the bottom of the North Atlantic! Same goes for the end of "Romeo + Juliet."
     
  4. PaperDoll

    PaperDoll When I'm Silent, I make the most sense

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    You are too funny Indigo... :laugh: :laugh:


    This year, I'm not in the mood for Valentines day.. I usually get a few cards for my friends and one for hubby, but I'm not in the mood for some reason... hubby isn't big on it but he does take me to dinner or he will buy me a little something because he feels he HAS TO so my feelings don't get hurt, and they will ... hehe
     
  5. close_enough

    close_enough Inactive

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    Indigo,
    this has made my morning...hilarious!!!! :clap:
     
  6. indigomood

    indigomood New Member

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    thanks, but I don't know who to credit with it... it's from an old email that was sent to me by my anti Valentine's Day friend. I thought too it was funny!

    :blowkiss:
     

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