How not to react when your child tells you he is gay.

Discussion in 'Up to the Minute' started by fruity, Aug 31, 2014.

  1. jellybeanz

    jellybeanz Well-Known Member

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    Any parent struggling with their child telling them they are gay should watch Prayers For Bobby. Especially if said parents claim to be religious and use that as an excuse for ostracising them.

    [video=youtube;Ys5TyY8RaxI]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ys5TyY8RaxI[/video]
     


  2. noZme

    noZme Well-Known Member

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    This makes me so sad.... and sadder still that I am not completely shocked by the Christian's reactions. They actually believe gay is behavior instead of being. I wish they could have formed opinions based on the whole Bible, not just Leviticus. And, I wish they could care as much about their son as what the church folks would be saying. Not all Georgians are so narrow-minded.

    I wish Daniel much love, happiness & success. His Bible-thumping folks threw this Daniel into the lion's den. I have a feeling he will overcome that & all other adversity.


    I am reminded of the old saying, "These homosexuals came from heterosexual couples."
     
  3. TrackerSam

    TrackerSam New Member

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    Their behavior is being used to denigrate all Christians and the term "bible thumper" soooo demonstrates how tolerant you are.
    I don't believe their reactions have anything to do with them being Christian. You can make the same argument without dragging their religious beliefs into it and I don't understand why it's done. The article mentions it several times.
     
  4. Linda7NJ

    Linda7NJ Well-Known Member

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    Religion is often used to justify hate.

    I have zero tolerance for people that hate and base that hate on a book.

    IMO


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  5. TrackerSam

    TrackerSam New Member

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    That doesn't make every church goer a hateful person, which is being implied in the article and some responses here.
    It's a two way street. Are there any gay Bible thumpers? Only Bible thumpers are intolerant of gays? Or they're intolerant of gays, so they must be Bible thumpers? The most intolerant people I've ever met were progressives, liberals or whatever they're calling themselves these days.
     
  6. Linda7NJ

    Linda7NJ Well-Known Member

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    You're right it doesn't.

    I did not limit myself to any one religion or just to the hatred of homosexuals.

    My point simply was I have no patience or tolerance for hatred of targeted groups based on religion.

    IMO


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  7. gitana1

    gitana1 Verified Attorney

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    The most intolerant people I have ever met have always been those who profess to be super religious Christians. Does that mean all Christians are intolerant? Not by a long shot. But this fanily adheres to a particularly intolerant form of it and it (their purported faith) is precisely the basis for their rejection and hateful attitude toward Daniel. They actually state that.

    I don't agree, however, that what they profess to believe in is actual Christianity at all. But it is 100% the basis for their reaction and thus an integral part of the story.

    Finally, "bible thumper" is a term that I take to mean someone who constantly pounds the bible, yelling about how everyone is a terrible sinner and how the bible proves it, while hypocritically not walking the walk themselves. It's basically someone who is aggressive about rebuking others. And that's not what Christianity is really about. You will never hear that term used to describe the quiet missionary building homes, handing out clothes or building wells and latrines in some third world hell hole, for example. It does not apply to the majority of people of faith and is simply not a blanket term for bible believing Christians. IMO.
     
  8. Nova

    Nova Well-Known Member

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    Did you watch the video, Sam? It is the father and stepmother who brought religion into the equation and used their brand of Christianity to justify disowning their son.

    My post and the others here question their definition of Christian values. I argued that their values are inconsistent with those of Christ Himself, while noZme argued that the parents are cherry-picking their Biblical interdictions. Every poster here (whether Christian or not) has implied a view of Christianity that is more tolerant and compassionate that that espoused by the parents in the video.

    This is the opposite of Christian-bashing. We are suggesting the parents failed to live up to the values they themselves claim to espouse.

    In this context, the term "bible-thumper" is akin to the hypocrites denounced by Jesus in the Gospels. Didn't He say quite a bit about people who cling to the word of the Law while ignoring the essence of God's commandments?

    Just in case this post isn't clear, let me sum up by saying most of us are not condemning Christians, but those who wrap themselves in so-called "Christian values" for the sake of appearances.
     
  9. Ausgirl

    Ausgirl ...

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    However. The boy's mother is the one 'dragging' religion into it in the first place. It's not like people here are pulling that out of their butts. Religion is part of the reasoning used to heap intolerance on this kid, so IMO it's quite appropriate to discuss the dichotomy many people see there -- between a faith which often preaches love and forgiveness, which is here used to bolster an attitude of hatefulness and rigid intolerance.

    I'm not seeing people bashing ALL Christians. But it does often happen that profound hypocrisy occurs where fundamentalist Christians meet heinous behaviour, and God is the stick they use in attempting to beat the world into their preferred shape. There's folks like that among all the major religions, obviously. Just so happens these particular ignoramuses are Christians.
     
  10. Linda7NJ

    Linda7NJ Well-Known Member

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    Well....I could easily bash all religions...but I won't because it's against the rules...:)


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  11. TrackerSam

    TrackerSam New Member

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    Doesn't invalidate the statement you quoted. I guess the derogatory word ' Bible thumper' was meant in a good and tolerant way. The whole story is based on a lie. He wasn't coming out, this was an intervention, so why did the author feel the need to change the fundamental circumstance of what really happened? Re-read the title and first line - How not to react when your child tells you he is gay.
    Daniel Pierce, a 19-year-old college student from Georgia in the United States, secretly filmed a conversation with his Christian parents where he is allegedly attacked after revealing his sexuality.
     
  12. Ausgirl

    Ausgirl ...

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    Sam - a 'lie', cmon. Maybe a bit of misinformation, but basically nothing untruthful in any of that. That his parents felt the need to hold an intervention at all is pretty solid evidence that they weren't marching under the rainbow banner on the day he actually came out to them.

    Don't you find the mother's attack (not 'alleged' -- the woman clearly attacked her son physically) kind of sad and scary?
     
  13. Dogface

    Dogface Well-Known Member

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    Maybe he saw it as coming out in the regards that he was telling his parents he won't be forced to change who he is and he is going to live his life as a gay man?

    Regardless of the semantics, how these parents acted is awful, violence is never the answer. They could have said they don't agree with his lifestyle, and it is their right(albeit I think stupidly) to think its a choice. But they simply could have said they don't agree, and that they need him to move out, and came up with a plan to get him on his own.

    When I hear the term "bible thumper" I don't think of all Christians, I think of the ones who try to cram their beliefs down your throat while not respecting others, again, that's my opinion. It makes me think of the extremist if that makes sense.
     
  14. Ausgirl

    Ausgirl ...

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    Ditto.
     
  15. TrackerSam

    TrackerSam New Member

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    Of course and I think most would. So why the disinformation in the title? It doesn't matter. Nor must the mother jump on the rainbow bandwagon. She loves her son and hates that he's gay. She's refusing to pop a bottle of bubbly.........let's get her.
     
  16. Linda7NJ

    Linda7NJ Well-Known Member

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    I would hope above all else every parent would love their child and simply wish for them to be happy and healthy.

    And yes that means being supportive.


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  17. Dogface

    Dogface Well-Known Member

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    I don't think it's the fact that she is refusing to pop a bottle of bubbly, it's the fact that the interaction turned into a violent, screaming attack. And IMO, you don't just wake up one day and tell your kid to get out of the house because you disagree with their perfectly legal lifestyle. I could understand if you found out your kid was involved with drugs, gangs, other violent things...but as a parent, you are suppose to parent. That means setting your kid up for success, not failure. Suddenly throwing you college going kid out of the house is not doing that. They should have said "look, we don't agree with your lifestyle, and we need you to move out by X date, what can we do to help make sure that deadline is met?".

    Setting your child up for failure based on your own beliefs only hurts your child and distances families. There is a right and wrong way to handle things. They did this completely wrong. IMO, MOO and all that jazz.
     
  18. TrackerSam

    TrackerSam New Member

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    Judging from the amount of money that's been donated to him he'll be going to college for free.
     
  19. Linda7NJ

    Linda7NJ Well-Known Member

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    I wish they could make the leap to 2014 and embrace SCIENCE!


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  20. Donjeta

    Donjeta Adji Desir, missing from Florida

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    I saw more evidence of hate than love in that video. JMO

    There is a lot of middle ground between opening a bottle of bubbly and violently attacking your children for being who they are.

    You don't usually disown someone you love
     

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