Kaine recalls when the marriage began to sour

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SO impressed with Kaine, Desiree and their faith.

I feel SO sorry for Kaine. Wow, that picture breaks my heart.

You know, Desiree seemed very sympathetic towards Kaine. I specially noticed that she smiled and consented when he talked about how he was very close to Kyron.

I'm sure Kaine has some skeletons in his closet, but don't most of all? Nothing he could have done makes it ok for Terri to harm his son like this.

I am very sympathetic towards this man and Terri seemed to have accomplished what she wanted: to destroy her husband.
 
Gee...I think all of this talking by Kaine is terrible! "My wife had our baby and then our marriage got rocky." Huh? Sorry folks, but that is not nice....not when your looking for your missing son. Every marriage goes through tough times. Thats normal. Thats what the vows are all about. If he thought Terri was depressed or having difficulties, then he needed to press her to seek some medical or psychological attention.

You have quoted text as if it should be attributed to a certain person and I do not find that quote anywhere.

THAT is not nice! It is also not nice to pounce on victims and this father is a victim.
 
You keep your friends close and your enemies closer.

IMHO, there is nothing to be gained by alienating her. If she's an attention seeker, narcissistic, whatever they believe her to be, then alienating her, humiliating her, obviously turning against her, is not going to give them what they want.

If Terri hates Kaine or Desiree or both or if she's jealous or psychotic or already felt ignored by her husband, then staging press conferences where they accuse her of this mess and then hugging in front of the cameras to drive home the point that she is out of the fold isn't going to help. Continuing to accuse, alienate and publicly badmouth her isn't going to make her want to cooperate, and they want her to cooperate.

To that end, they need to play her game. If the focus is on finding Kyron, then suck it up for the kid and find a way back into her good graces. Say they know it wasn't her fault, it was an accident, they know she loved him, have them give her what she'll believe is an out.

Honestly, I believe it's too late for that now, but it would've made sense to do that in the beginning to get what they wanted from her or to continue to do that as much as they're able.

I think they tried this tactic for 3 weeks and while she appeared to cooperate all she did was lie. They have nothing to lose IMO.
 
Sorry. My only reaction to this crap is:

Here comes the next skeleton - and it's Kaine's...

IMO, we can watch for another part of the story to break soon ... the story that explains Terri's motive(s).
 
I don't know...I don't think a mother who is jealous of her daughter would take, and show, so many pics of her on her Facebook. She seemed to dote on her daughter...

If she's NPD, K could be her "golden child". With NPD there is often a family dynamic of the golden child and the scapegoat. The girl is also like a miniature TH, which if she is NPD would please her greatly so yes she would dote on her. Also, in my experience, with the narcissistic people I've known, including my mother, looooove babies, but once the child starts talking and becoming independent, all bets are off. They can't be controlled anymore and they don't see Mom as perfect anymore. It messes up the picture they try to paint of themselves. MOO, I'm not a psychologist.

ETA: And P.S. my mother was extremely jealous of me and she takes tons of photos--it's what good mommies are supposed to do.
 
Sorry. My only reaction to this crap is:

Here comes the next skeleton - and it's Kaine's...

IMO, we can watch for another part of the story to break soon ... the story that explains Terri's motive(s).

The only story I want to read is that Kyron is safe at home with his parents.
 
I don't care about Terri's motives. There is NO motive that would make it ok to harm someone else's child. Kaine can have 394589358 skeletons, but he is not a suspect of dissapearing and possibly murdering a 7-year old.
 
Its hard to talk about this kind of thing, since its too taboo to even think of anything negative associated with having a baby.

But I will open up and explain my own experiences with the subject. Hopefully it will be met with understanding.

My husband and I had our first child five years after we got married. Because of where I was stationed, we lived about a day's drive away from any family members. I had no help. I began to realized that my husband was raised in a situation that the woman/mother/wife does everything and never complains, and he felt little responsibility in caring for and tending to our child. He was able to come home after work and rest, relax. He could take a nap. He could still come and go as he pleased, doing what he wanted after he got off of work. But if I had tried to take a nap, or go out grocery shopping alone, it was inconvenient to him since he would then have to be the one taking care of the baby. And he let me know it. I was the one who had to soothe our crying baby in the middle of the night, he would never even wake up. But I was working too, twelve hour days in fact. And he would never help me keep the house clean. He would never even try to pick up after himself. I had to do it all. I'm not trying to say he never did anything with our child. He was very involved with our baby, but he always got to "have fun" with the baby. I had to take care of the baby. I was working 60 hours a week (20 more hours than him), and I still also had to do all of the household chores.

I know he wasn't trying to be malicious. I know he wasn't trying to purposely make my life miserable. It was simply his belief on how home life was, based on his own childhood. (Although his mother never had to work.)

The situation caused me to resent him so much. I couldn't grasp how he couldn't see what he was doing, and take more responsibility. Our marriage absolutely went downhill.

I placed all blame squarely on his shoulders. I saw him as some primitive, selfish, uncaring ogre. Constantly exhausted, as if all life had been sucked out of me, I was miserable with our marriage. He was excited, happy, and energized. I was constantly angry that I never got more than 2 hours sleep at a time for the first nine months. I began having anxiety attacks, and outbursts of anger at his messiness that I always had to clean. Infact, part of me still resents him for making what should have been the happiest time of our lives, one of the hardest to survive. But we did survive it. And from what I see with our second child, he learned his lesson. He helps me infinitely more now than he did before, and I'm not even having to work now.

I'm sorry for the long story, but I can see how Kaine can associate such a life changing event with a turning point in his marriage. I don't think for one second that he is trying to place blame on his child. He just recognized a major change in his marriage after the birth.
 
Sorry. My only reaction to this crap is:

Here comes the next skeleton - and it's Kaine's...

IMO, we can watch for another part of the story to break soon ... the story that explains Terri's motive(s).

Great. Once again you come up with something that makes me start to rethink things. Well I won't have it!
Ok so you just may be right, but I will withhold any judgment for now.

And no more smelling salts for you!
 
Sorry. My only reaction to this crap is:

Here comes the next skeleton - and it's Kaine's...

IMO, we can watch for another part of the story to break soon ... the story that explains Terri's motive(s).
Good.It's about time. But....You never know, there just might be an arrest of someone else,another POI very soon.
 
Sorry. My only reaction to this crap is:

Here comes the next skeleton - and it's Kaine's...

IMO, we can watch for another part of the story to break soon ... the story that explains Terri's motive(s).

Yes... I fully expect Terri and her lawyer bustin' out Kaine's skeletons. I agree!
 
She is darn lucky! Lucky that she married him, and not someone who would hurt her for what she has done. OMG! I am so angry, and Kyron is not even my child! The ache that we all feel everytime they come on the air! She deserves no respect!

I feel the pain alongside you...
 
You have quoted text as if it should be attributed to a certain person and I do not find that quote anywhere.

THAT is not nice! It is also not nice to pounce on victims and this father is a victim.

Sorry, it wasn't an exact quote...I was just summing up the basics of what was said. I should not have put quotations there because it was misleading. And I don't mean to pounce on victims. I have great compassion for this family...but even victims have a certain amount of accountability.

I'm amazed at the way that the public seems to have sealed Terri's fate. It seems cruel to me. I preface this by saying that I am not certain she is innocent...and I am not certain she is guilty. We do not have the full picture. We have absolutely no evidence to prove that Terri did anything illegal here.
Others have suggested Terri wanted to destroy her husband. I suppose they are using the landscaper's story to accuse her. While the mfh plot seems condemning, we do not have proof of the landscaper's story.

We have folks saying Terri deserves to be homeless or worse. If she has done something to Kyron then she deserves the full measure of the law to be thrown on her. But the law says we are innocent until proven guilty. I suppose I am thinking of that.

Sorry if I have offended....
 
If she's NPD, K could be her "golden child". With NPD there is often a family dynamic of the golden child and the scapegoat. The girl is also like a miniature TH, which if she is NPD would please her greatly so yes she would dote on her. Also, in my experience, with the narcissistic people I've known, including my mother, looooove babies, but once the child starts talking and becoming independent, all bets are off. They can't be controlled anymore and they don't see Mom as perfect anymore. It messes up the picture they try to paint of themselves. MOO, I'm not a psychologist.

ETA: And P.S. my mother was extremely jealous of me and she takes tons of photos--it's what good mommies are supposed to do.


Wow, I don't know how anyone could conclude or even speculate that TH has NPD, unless they know her IRL... I feel like I've read everything "out there" and haven't seen one thing that would assist me in "diagnosing" her in any way... MOO
 
Well at least now we know. If, as we suspect, have actually been together since sometime before or around Kyron's birth, then they didn't get married until 2006. They didn't move too quickly.

Then he says he thought the marriage was doing 'pretty well' before the baby was born. That is not a love filled, wedded bliss kinda statement.

I don't want to think about what Kyron had to be living with since things took the turn for the worse.

Per RO
married: 04/15/07
mutual child born: 11/12/08
 
I don't care about Terri's motives. There is NO motive that would make it ok to harm someone else's child. Kaine can have 394589358 skeletons, but he is not a suspect of dissapearing and possibly murdering a 7-year old.

The thing that gets me is that soooo many people wanted that boy - his mom, stepdad, dad, grandparents on both sides. So if she was sick of him, why not say 'it's him or me?' that's why I see this as premeditated. Thank you KeyboardCat for sharing. I think men just tell it like it is, and I also think that he has held great restraint in not saying worse to what may be his child's murderer. And so help me, if it turns out she is to blame and she did things to try to make it look like an SO, I think my heart will break. I'm still hoping she's just nuts enough to have sold him...
 
I don't care about Terri's motives. There is NO motive that would make it ok to harm someone else's child. Kaine can have 394589358 skeletons, but he is not a suspect of dissapearing and possibly murdering a 7-year old.

Well stated. The thing that gets me is that soooo many people wanted that boy - his mom, stepdad, dad, grandparents on both sides. So if she was sick of him, why not say 'it's him or me?' that's why I see this as premeditated. Thank you KeyboardCat for sharing. I think men just tell it like it is, and I also think that he has held great restraint in not saying worse to what may be his child's murderer. And so help me, if it turns out she is to blame and she did things to try to make it look like an SO, I think my heart will break. I'm still hoping she's just nuts enough to have sold him...
 
Gee...I think all of this talking by Kaine is terrible! "My wife had our baby and then our marriage got rocky." Huh? Sorry folks, but that is not nice....not when your looking for your missing son. Every marriage goes through tough times. Thats normal. Thats what the vows are all about. If he thought Terri was depressed or having difficulties, then he needed to press her to seek some medical or psychological attention.

Not nice?? But we have no idea as to what happened with or between them, do we? Hindsight is 20/20.............
 
As an aside, I think the wording here is a bit thoughtless, and would suggest any parent wanting to talk of their marriage going sour after their child born to rethink saying this in any way that the child might get a hold of later in life, esp not in the press. I worry K., in the future, will read, "I came along, and dad and mom hated each other, so Kyron died."

Not a good load to dump on a kid, though I know it was totally not meant that way.

Wording counts.
 
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