Hi Zella, I recently listened to my Fatal Vision audiobook four times in a row because I wanted to dive into the evidence and commit them to memory.I think he's an arrogant pathological liar who will never admit he is guilty because it dismantles the persona he tries to sell. However, I also don't think he believes the bullcrap he peddles.
I couldn't actually finish Fatal Vision because the chapters from his perspective were so annoying. It was all about how great and wonderful and amazing he was and what little he said about his family was incredibly disinterested.
I think it genuinely baffles him that people want to focus on the fact that he murdered his family instead of his professional accomplishments of going to highly ranked schools and becoming a doctor for the Green Berets, but I think he has enough social skills to know that this isn't something you say out loud.
Jeff’s notes and recordings were super annoying but they
were useful to compare with known facts and witness
testimony; they illustrate what a narcissistic liar he is.
It also shows what he really thought about Colette.